After All
by FebWriter
Summary: A standalone story set in 1996 and unrelated to all my other stories. After the mistakes they've both made, can Roger and Holly find their way back to each other and make it last forever this time? An AU take on certain events from GL from 1995 onward.
1. By Way of Explanation

_**This story is going to be different from the other stories I have written so far, and also requires a bit of an explanation.**_

_**While my previous stories have established me as a Roger and Holly fan, and a Ross and Blake fan, I am also a fan of the soap Another World. A lot of things happened to favorite, beloved characters on AW that I would rather hadn't happened, and of course I hated what happened to Roger and Holly on GL. **_

_**This story is set in 1996, specifically May to December of that year, combines elements of both Guiding Light and Another World, and turns everything about both shows involving all of the characters featured in the story on its ear. I would have to say I am more faithful to GL canon than AW canon, since for the GL part of the story, Holly did marry Fletcher, but Meg does not exist, and Dinah and Hart did gaslight Roger, but this story goes a completely different way than GL did with regards to that particular marriage, and the progress and outcome of the Dinah and Hart gaslight Roger story. As for AW, I changed pretty much everything: Frankie and Ryan are not dead; John and Sharlene never got divorced; Rachel and Carl are getting divorced; Ryan and Vicky are married and Ryan is Kirk's father; Michael and Donna are living together. **_

_**If you were a huge fan of Dinah and Hart, and/or never had any desire to answer the question, "What if Holly realized what a monumental mistake she made ever getting involved with Fletcher at all and decided that she wanted Roger back, and on the same day she's going to go to him and tell him this, she discovers that Dinah and Hart are gaslighting Roger?," I suggest you read no further, because this story, like all of my stories so far, is very much pro-Roger and Holly. **_

_**It isn't necessary to have ever seen even one episode of AW to be able to follow this story. Five characters from AW will play a major part in it, three will play minor but significant parts, several others will be mentioned. The main characters are really Roger and Holly, with appearances by Dinah and Hart, Blake and Ross, Kevin and Jason, and Detective Cutter. **_

_**This is my way of fixing the things I hated the most from both shows, and hopefully by the end of the story, you will have found something to like about the denizens of Bay City that you'll meet in this story, and enjoyed the journey that Holly and Roger undertake herein.**_

_**Here are the Bay City residents, along with the actors who portrayed them in case you want to look up what anyone looks like, that Roger and Holly will be meeting and interacting with in this story:**_

_**Michael Hudson (played by Kale Browne): Michael, the oldest son of a single mother, grew up on a farm and worked as a stable boy for the wealthy Love family as a teenager. He and the oldest Love daughter Donna fell madly in love, but when Donna's evil, sociopathic father Reginald found out about their relationship, he beat Michael to within an inch of his life and drove him away, telling him that Donna never wanted to see him again. Michael vowed that he would make his way in the world and someday return to Donna...not knowing that she was pregnant with their twin daughters. Michael joined the Marines, became a helicopter pilot, then worked for the CIA, and after leaving the Agency, he worked hard at his own company, ultimately becoming a wealthy, self-made success as a businessman. He returned to Bay City in the mid-1980s, and he and Donna found each other again. Michael was shocked to learn that Donna had given birth to his daughter Marley after Reginald forced them apart and ran Michael out of town, and that Reginald had forced Donna to raise Marley as her sister. But Michael, Donna, and Marley all three were in for another shock when Victoria turned up in town; Donna had given birth to identical twins, and Reginald had given Vicky up for adoption. Vicky's adoptive parents died when she was a baby, and she was raised in Lassiter, Pennsylvania, by her adoptive parents' housekeeper Bridget Connell (Barbara Berjer). Vicky and Marley were 18 when they met and learned that Michael and Donna were their parents. After much difficulty, Michael, Donna, Vicky, and Marley eventually settled in as a family. Vicky (Anne Heche) is now married to police commissioner Ryan Harrison. She is the mother of Steven Frame, age 7, her son by her first marriage to Dr. James "Jamie" Frame, and Kirk Harrison, age 2, her son with Ryan. Marley (Anne Heche) is married to Jamie Frame (Russell Todd), and they are the parents of a baby son, Christopher. Reginald died in 1988, but not before causing more heartache for Michael and Donna. When Michael was drawn back into the Agency for one last assignment in 1990, in order to protect Donna, he lied to her that he was having an affair and moved out. Donna was devastated and threw herself into work, and eventually had a one-night stand with her and Michael's former son-in-law Jake McKinnon. When Michael found out, after his assignment was over and in the middle of Marley's trial for her ex-husband Jake's attempted murder, that spelled the end of their third marriage for real. It took several years, but Michael and Donna found their way back to each other in November 1995. Michael now helms Hudson Enterprises, and he and Donna are living together, but after three strikes in the marriage department, both are wary of tying the knot again. Michael will always go to the wall for the people he cares about, no matter what it takes...and when an old friend is in trouble, Michael eagerly volunteers to jump into the fray.**_

_**Donna Love (played by Anna Stuart): Donna was raised by her emotionally abusive, sociopathic father Reginald Love after he murdered her mother Elizabeth. Her brother Peter followed in their father's footsteps and eventually fled to Europe, and her sister Nicole battled a cocaine addiction, murdered Jason Frame, and ended up in a mental institution, so Donna is the only family member who really survived Reginald. Michael Hudson is the love of her life, the father of her daughters Marley and Victoria, and they have three grandsons, Steven, Kirk, and Christopher. Though she was expected to be a socialite, Donna ultimately defied both her father and expectations first by falling in love with and ultimately marrying Michael three times, and then by going to work, first at Jake McKinnon's video company, then at local TV station KBAY, and currently as the owner of restaurant/bar The Harbor Club. When Marley was accused of shooting Jake in late 1990, Donna confessed to the crime and spent some time in jail in order to spare her daughter before it was discovered that neither Donna nor Marley was the shooter. The night before Donna was to marry the much younger Matthew Cory in 1995, she and Michael made love. Late to her own wedding the next morning, Donna crashed her car on the way to the ceremony and married Matthew in her hospital room (she only had minor injuries), but when Matthew found out a few months later about her night with Michael, he got an annulment. Michael and Donna eventually reconciled in November 1995 and are solidly, happily together, but resisting getting married for a fourth time, not wanting to fail at marriage yet again. Donna is high-spirited, outspoken, with a mischievous streak, and Michael is the feet on the ground type, a man with a plan at all times. The one thing Donna doesn't have is a close female friend...but that's about to change.**_

_**Mary Frances "Frankie" Frame (played by Alice Barrett Mitchell): Frankie, a private investigator, came to Bay City in 1989 to find out who murdered her uncle, Jason Frame. She and Cass Winthrop, the attorney for the accused killer Felicia Gallant, were not thrilled with each other at first since they were working at cross-purposes (Cass to prove Felicia's innocence, Frankie to prove Felicia's guilt), but Frankie was the one who discovered that the real killer was Nicole Love...Cass's then-fiancée. When Nicole threatened Frankie's life after Frankie exposed her as Jason's killer and Cass had broken up with her, Cass became protective of Frankie, saving her from an increasingly unhinged Nicole after a heads-up from Michael that Nicole had gone to see Frankie alone, and Frankie and Cass became friends and co-workers, then fell in love. They were married August 1, 1990, but Cass's dead first wife Kathleen McKinnon wasn't dead after all, and when she returned from the dead in early 1991, an unhappy triangle was born. By the time of what would have been their first wedding anniversary, Cass realized that Frankie was the one he loved and wanted to be with, but he had to earn back her trust. Cass's love brought Frankie back from the brink when she nearly died saving Kathleen from an explosion engineered by Carl Hutchins, who had tried to kill Kathleen in the first place, sending her into hiding and causing her to fake her death to Cass and the world at large for four years. Carl went to jail for trying to kill Frankie but was released only a few months later on a technicality. Cass and Frankie continued to grow closer after Kathleen left town, but learning that Frankie had miscarried their baby (she hadn't told Cass she was pregnant because she didn't want him to feel obligated to come back to her since that's when he was back with Kathleen), and the presumed death of Frankie's beloved aunt Sharlene Frame Hudson in a boat explosion, presented more challenges for Cass and Frankie to work through. Frankie was confused over whether to trust and reunite with Cass, or to step in and take care of the husband and son Sharlene left behind. Finally Frankie left town to concentrate on thinking over the dilemma, and after three months meditating on a mountaintop in Peru, she returned home knowing exactly who and what she wanted: Cass. They reunited and then became engaged again, but their friends and family had one crisis after another that Cass and Frankie stepped in to help with, and then a friend from Frankie's past, Christy Carson, came back into Frankie's life, framed Frankie for the murder of Christy's husband Douglas, and poisoned Cass. After surviving Christy, Frankie and Cass were prepared to live in sin for the rest of their lives, since every time they scheduled a wedding, some kind of disaster happened to torpedo it (their August 1990 wedding was on the spur of the moment at home only hours after Cass rescued Frankie, who had been kidnapped in a case of mistaken identity), but their friends and family were determined to see them married and so the group planned the wedding for them and then kidnapped the bride and groom to Venice, Italy, where they were (at last) legally married on May 19, 1993. Their daughter Charlotte "Charlie" Frame Winthrop was born February 2, 1994 in Bay City. Frankie is still a private investigator, often working with Cass on cases, as well as consulting with the Bay City Police Department in a similar capacity at the behest of her best friend Commissioner Ryan Harrison. Frankie is a big believer in karma and helping her fellow travelers through the universe, and she sees echoes of her and Cass's past issues in the two clients in her latest case, Holly Lindsey and Roger Thorpe, and becomes determined to help them in every way she possibly can.**_

_**Cass Winthrop (played by Stephen Schnetzer): The original Casanova of Bay City, legal eagle Cass had several relationships and one marriage under his belt before meeting the love of his life, Mary Frances Frame, in 1989. Frankie was different from every other woman Cass had ever known, and Cass slowly found himself falling hard for her. Frankie was falling just as hard for him, but never having been in love before, she was terrified, but Cass was patient with all of her insecurities and was not above doing the absolutely craziest thing possible at several junctures to prove that Frankie was it for him, including dressing as a nun and sweet-talking his way past the Mother Superior when the upset, insecure Frankie fled to a convent to try and work through her feelings for Cass. Cass was a nervous wreck the night he proposed; after all, he and Frankie, having known each other for a year at that point, already had a history of getting caught in dangerous situations, including facing a gunman in Arizona while searching for Rachel Cory, finding a dead body floating in the bay while walking there on the night of their first date, and Cass rescuing Frankie from a theater that was slated for demolition after criminal mastermind Griffen Saunders locked her in a storeroom and left her there to die. But they decided to take the chance on the beautiful disaster that could be marriage, and Frankie happily said yes when Cass popped the question. Of course, being Cass and Frankie, Frankie was kidnapped from their scheduled wedding in late July 1990 in a case of mistaken identity, but Cass rescued her, and they were married in the home they had just bought together on August 1 of that year. Cass's whole life was turned upside down when the wife he thought had died four years earlier in a plane crash in Alaska, Kathleen McKinnon, returned from the dead, having been in Witness Protection because of Carl Hutchins. Carl was still targeting Kathleen, but Kathleen, who had returned home when her cousin Jake was shot and near death, wanted Cass back. Kathleen granted Cass a divorce, but then fainted at Cass and Frankie's next scheduled wedding attempt in April 1991, putting the kibosh on those nuptials. Cass left Frankie to try to recapture the past with Kathleen, not knowing that Frankie was pregnant. After three months, Cass realized the mistake he had made; Kathleen was his past, Frankie was his future...but Frankie was not eager to get her heart shattered again by the only man she ever loved, though she loved him still. Cass then had to earn back her trust. His own trust was shaken when he learned, after Frankie nearly died saving Kathleen from an explosion engineered by Carl Hutchins, that Frankie had miscarried their baby and never even told him she was pregnant because she didn't want him to feel obligated to come back to her because of their child. Cass willed Frankie to come back to him when she was clinically dead at the hospital after the explosion, and from then on he was on a relentless campaign to earn back her trust and make her his wife again, forever this time. They grew closer, worked together, and Cass proposed several times, but Frankie just wasn't ready to reconcile with him yet. Then the presumed death of Frankie's beloved aunt Sharlene Hudson confused the issue further, since Sharlene, knowing her life was in danger, had made Frankie, her best friend as well as her niece, promise to look after Sharlene's beloved husband John and their baby son Gregory if anything happened to Sharlene. It was a promise Frankie made willingly and wholeheartedly, but it frustrated Cass, who feared losing Frankie to John. On Valentine's Day 1992, Cass left his sickbed after a film noir dream featuring himself, Frankie and John, among others, tracked Frankie down at the annual Valentine's Ball, and asked her again to marry him. Frankie's response was that she was leaving town to meditate on the entire situation, and when she returned, she would know for sure where her future lay. Cass bided his time, but misunderstood when he learned that Frankie was back in town and had gone to see John first. She had gone to see John to tell him that she was getting back together with Cass, but Cass, thinking she had gone to see John to tell him that she was going to be with him and Gregory, decided he could no longer live in Bay City without Frankie and was ready to move to California to work with his attorney sister Stacey. Frankie learned from Cass's best friend Felicia Gallant what was going on and frantically raced to the airport, where she and Cass finally reunited. Further issues with their family and friends forestalled their next attempt at a legal wedding, and then they had to fight for their very lives when Frankie's old friend Christy Carson framed Frankie for the murder of Christy's husband Douglas and poisoned Cass after realizing that Frankie would not go to jail for the murder, and that Cass loved only Frankie and not Christy, but after Christy was taken to a mental institution, Cass and Frankie could finally get on with their lives. Their friends and family arranged a wedding for them and then kidnapped them to Venice, Italy, where they were married on May 19, 1993. They honeymooned in Europe, and Frankie was pregnant when they returned home. Their daughter Charlie was born the next February. Cass and Frankie are the strongest married couple in Bay City, always there for each other and for their friends and family. Cass is drawn into Frankie's latest case when Holly needs legal help unrelated to the case, and soon sees what his wife means when she says that Holly and Roger remind her of where they were in the months after Kathleen, when they were working to rebuild their relationship.**_

_**Rachel Cory (played by Victoria Wyndham): Rachel's life drastically changed after the sudden, unexpected death of her beloved husband Mackenzie "Mac" Cory in June 1989. Mac was the love of Rachel's life, and their family is Mac's enduring legacy, numbering six children (his, hers, and theirs), eight grandchildren, and one great-grandchild at last count. A talented sculptor by trade, Rachel took over the running of the company Mac built from the ground up, Cory Publishing, upon his death. Mac's daughter Iris Wheeler (Carmen Duncan), and Mac and Rachel's daughter Amanda, work at Cory Publishing in Bay City with her, while Mac's son Sandy heads up the San Francisco office. Mac's daughter Paulina Cory McKinnon (Judi Evans), and Mac and Rachel's son Matt (Matt Crane), work at KBAY, the television station that the Cory family owns, and that Rachel is now looking to sell. Rachel's oldest son, Jamie Frame, is a doctor at Bay City General Hospital, and the only one of their six kids not somehow involved in the family business, although he did have a novel published before going to medical school in the mid-'80s. In 1994, Rachel married Carl Hutchins, who swore that he had reformed because of both her love and the discovery of his previously unknown son, police commissioner Ryan Harrison. But it was all lies, and Carl is now headed back to prison, so Rachel is in the process of divorcing him. She did gain another son out of the marriage though, in Ryan, who, like Paulina, never knew his real mother and considers Rachel the closest thing he has to one. Rachel wants to get back to her artistic roots, hence the sale of KBAY, and her turning over most of her duties at Cory Publishing to Iris. The train wreck of her marriage to Carl has made her realize that she truly had a once-in-a-lifetime love with Mac, although they certainly had their ups and down, divorcing twice and marrying three times over many years before staying married until Mac's sudden, unexpected death of a heart attack. Rachel started out as a devious schemer, but Mac's unconditional love and acceptance gave her the security she had never known and always wanted in life, and though she still misses him and always will, more acutely these days than she has in quite a while, she is an astute businesswoman, talented artist, loving and devoted mother, stepmother, and grandmother, and loyal friend. Rachel meets Holly and Roger first separately, then together, and befriends Holly. **_

_**These five are the major players in Roger and Holly's journey in this story, but a few others will be making minor but significant appearances as well.**_

_**Dr. John Hudson (played by David Forsyth): Michael's younger brother, Chief of Staff and head of internal medicine at Bay City General Hospital. John was a combat medic in Vietnam, then went to medical school and tried to put his life back together, but he was so affected by what he saw during the war that after med school, he spent 20 years drifting, wandering the world. Michael finally found him and brought him back home to Bay City in 1987. John reconnected with Sharlene Frame (Anna Kathryn Holbrook), whom he had known in high school and who was still living on her family's farm, which was right next door to John and Michael's mother's farm. John and Sharlene were married in November 1989, and John passed the medical boards and joined the staff of Bay City General shortly before the wedding. John's marriage made him stepfather to Sharlene's 17-year-old daughter Josie, who never knew her own father and eventually began calling John 'Dad.'John and Sharlene welcomed son Gregory John Hudson in February 1991. Sadly, Sharlene was presumed dead after her obsessed psychotic psychiatrist Taylor Benson blew up her yacht Windswept with Sharlene aboard in November 1991. Sharlene returned to town with amnesia, calling herself Kate Baker, in December 1993. John worked overtime to help her regain her memory, and to woo her again, and they were joyfully remarried in June 1995 with Gregory, Josie, and family and friends including Frankie and Cass, Michael and Donna, and Rachel in attendance. John and Michael have a close, strong relationship, and there isn't anything these two brothers wouldn't do for each other.**_

_**Amanda Cory (played by Sandra Ferguson): Amanda is Mac and Rachel's only daughter together, and the flighty one in the family. She became pregnant at 19 by her first boyfriend, artist Sam Fowler, and they married and welcomed daughter Allie a short time later. But Amanda felt tied down and was not as ready for the responsibilities of marriage and family as Sam, five years her senior, was. She became attracted to business wunderkind Evan Bates and began an affair with him, and that spelled the end of her marriage to Sam. Her relationship with Evan didn't last, but Sam found lasting love with ballet dancer and dance instructor Olivia Matthews, and they married and have primary custody of Allie, in addition to their own son Brian. Amanda works at Cory Publishing and often jets to the European offices to handle things, but she's back in Bay City for an extended visit, and is therefore paying close attention to the prospective buyers of KBAY when they come to talk to Rachel at her Cory Publishing office. **_

_**Ryan Harrison (played by Paul Michael Valley): One of Michael and Donna's sons-in-law (married to Vicky Hudson), Ryan is the youngest commissioner in the history of the Bay City Police Department. A former FBI agent, he settled in Bay City in 1990 after coming to town to run a sting operation. He was one of the agents who kidnapped Frankie Frame by mistake from her first scheduled wedding, which is how they met. They soon became best friends. Ryan was raised by his emotionally distant stepfather Spencer Harrison with his half-brother Grant Harrison, and although he and Grant were close as children, when Grant stole Vicky away from Ryan, then later tried to kill Ryan when their long-absent psychotic mother Justine Duvalier returned, Ryan severed all ties with Grant before Grant went to prison for attempted murder. Though he tried building a relationship with his biological father Carl Hutchins, Carl's criminal lifestyle directly clashes with Ryan's law and order values. Ryan has taken the Hudsons, including Bridget Connell, the woman who raised Vicky and is now nanny to their sons Steven and Kirk, and the Corys, particularly his soon-to-be-ex-stepmother Rachel, as his family. Vicky is the free spirit in the relationship, while Ryan's feet are firmly planted on the ground; Vicky loosens Ryan up, while Ryan keeps Vicky grounded. Since Vicky takes after her mother Donna (Marley's temperament is closer to that of their father Michael), Ryan has experience dealing with Vicky and Donna both when they cut loose, which ultimately comes in handy in this story.**_

_**While this is technically a crossover story with Another World, the core of the story, its heart and soul, is Roger and Holly, how they find their way back to each other, and what they find, what they learn about themselves, and what they learn about one another on the course of this journey. **_

_**I would like to thank my friend Carol for properly sizing the picture that accompanies this story since I am hopelessly inept at that sort of thing, and PriscillaPal for her enthusiastic encouragement when I first came up with the idea for this story. **_

_**I hope you enjoy this different kind of story, and this take on Roger and Holly. I will be returning to the alternate timeline I created with a sequel to "With Arms Wide Open" after the completion of this story. In the meantime, here we go with "After All."**_


	2. Just One Chance

The calendar may have read late May, but for Holly Lindsey it was Independence Day.

She had just come from filing for divorce from Fletcher Reade, her latest, and in some ways her greatest, mistake.

But then, it wasn't like she hadn't done this before. She really had to break the habit of marrying her rebound men. First Ed Bauer, what felt like a million years ago, and last year, Fletcher.

At least she was well versed in divorce procedures, and it wasn't nearly the bureaucratic headache in the United States that it was in Switzerland. (She would have liked to blame marrying Dietrich Lindsey on being on the rebound, but that wasn't the case. She hadn't even known Roger was alive when she had married Dietrich, not that she had married Dietrich for love, or even lust.) This was divorce number four.

Fletcher hadn't put up much of a fight, and what protest he had lodged had been strictly to assuage his own ego. When he had seen how determined Holly was to end their marriage (not that it was much of a marriage, really, since Fletcher was really already married to his job at the _Springfield Journal_), he had acquiesced and then promptly informed her that all of the details, including the filing, were up to her. He was too busy, what with a newspaper to run and a teenage son to raise.

That suited Holly just fine. Getting out of this mistake of a marriage with the minimum of difficulty was half the battle.

The other half was really up to Roger.

_The face of all the world is changed, I think, since first I heard the footsteps of thy soul._

Since the instant Roger entered her life, she had never been able to read that particular sonnet of Elizabeth Barrett Browning's without automatically thinking of him.

Holly had cursed herself for a fool ten million times for believing Alexandra Spaulding when Alex made it look like she had gotten Roger into bed, which had pushed Holly to find solace in Fletcher's arms. Alex was at fault for trying to destroy Roger to keep him out of her family's company. Alan Spaulding was at fault for trying to use Roger to get the company away from Alex after Alan was released from prison. Roger was at fault for letting himself get so blinded by the promise of control of Spaulding that he put that above his and Holly's relationship. But Holly was at fault for cheating on Roger, and then for panicking and chickening out and going with the rebound man instead of seeing if she and Roger could actually work things out.

They had both made mistakes, but Roger marrying Dinah Marler was strictly a reaction to Holly marrying Fletcher. She knew that as well as she knew her own name, and that the sun rose in the east every morning.

One year. That was all the time they had together before Spaulding, stupidity, and poor choices on both of their parts had blown their relationship apart.

But in that year, Holly had never been happier, felt more alive, felt more at ease in her own skin, than she had ever been or felt in her life.

Roger hadn't married Dinah for love, that was certain. They were already maintaining mostly separate residences, Roger having taken a room at the country club and Dinah living in a swanky penthouse apartment when she was in town, which apparently she was a lot more lately than she had been for the past few months, according to Holly and Roger's daughter Blake, who also happened to be Dinah's stepmother. Dinah's father, Blake's husband, Ross Marler had nearly gone into an apoplectic rage when his daughter married Roger.

But Blake, with practically newborn twin sons and her own set of difficulties with Dinah, wasn't aware yet that Holly had filed for divorce from Fletcher, and that she wanted Roger back. But Blake might have an inkling of Holly's true feelings; she always had believed that Holly and Roger belonged together.

Now Holly finally knew that she and Roger belonged together too.

And she was willing to do whatever it took to get back together with Roger. After 30 years of fighting the tidal wave, she was finally honest enough and brave enough and just flat out ready to admit the truth: Roger was the only man she would ever love, and the only man she wanted to be with.

Before everything between them had imploded, Roger had asked Holly to marry him. She had wanted to say yes, but she hadn't. It seemed so long ago, but it wouldn't be two years until November.

Holly wanted to marry Roger. And this time, she vowed to herself, she would not let anything get in the way of their relationship, their hopefully eventual marriage.

Of course, they couldn't get married right away, and not only because she was still legally married to Fletcher.

They had to rebuild their relationship. Work up to marriage.

Whatever it took, no matter how long it took, Holly was finally ready to give Roger and a real relationship, a real marriage with him, everything she had and everything she was. Being married to the absolute wrong man (again) had a way of crystallizing what you wanted with the absolute right man.

She only hoped he would give her the opportunity to prove that this time she meant it, and would mean it for the rest of their lives.

She was sitting there in the park, trying to figure out what to say to Roger, when she heard people talking and walking on the nearby foot path. The bench on which she was sitting was partially obscured by a large hydrangea hedge, so she couldn't see the people as they approached, but she could hear them.

"I'm telling you, Hart, we've got Roger so turned around he doesn't know if he's coming or going. The gaslighting is working perfectly, and makes it worth the time I have to spend with him at the penthouse. At least it has two bedrooms, so we don't have to share a bed anymore."

"He's not turned around enough yet. We have to keep turning the screws until he's so convinced he's losing his mind that he checks himself into a mental hospital or a psychiatric ward somewhere."

"Piece of cake."

"I don't know, Dinah. He's stubborn. And he feels no guilt about draining your trust fund."

"True, but I know exactly where in the Cayman Islands he put my trust fund. And once he's in the loony bin, you and I can jet down there and get it back. I got him to sign the papers putting me on the account this morning, so I have full access to it. Nothing can go wrong, Hart. Everything is going according to our plan. We get the money, we get each other, and Roger gets up close and personal with the local version of Nurse Ratched."

"That's what I call win-win-win," Hart said.

Holly carefully, silently crept closer to the twelve-foot hydrangea hedge and peeked around the corner, and sure enough, there were Dinah and Hart, ambling lazily down the path, and holding hands as they walked, looking very, very familiar...downright cozy, in fact, and very much like a young couple in love.

Just as Holly was realizing this, the two stopped walking, and Hart pulled Dinah in for a kiss.

_Great, so not only are they gaslighting Roger, they're sleeping together on top of it,_ Holly thought grimly.

_He has to know about this. He probably already does. He's too smart not to realize what they're really doing...isn't he?, _she wondered.

Hart and Dinah were in a full-on makeout session now. Holly kept her eyes focused on the ground, making sure she didn't step on any twigs or dry leaves or trip over any rocks, not wanting to alert them to her presence.

Now she had two excellent reasons to see Roger, she thought as she drove to the country club: to make sure he knew what Dinah and Hart were really doing...and to tell him that she was divorcing Fletcher and that she still loved him and wanted him back.

A few minutes later, she was standing in front of Roger's door at the country club, and with a deep breath and a hopeful prayer, she knocked on the door.

When Roger opened the door to find Holly standing there, his surprise was palpable. They just stared at each other for a long moment, and finally Holly asked, "May I come in?"

Roger wordlessly stood aside, and she entered the room. He closed the door and said, "What are you doing here, Holly?"

This was it. Holly set her purse on the desk, nervously wiped her sweaty palms on her slacks, and opened with, "Dinah and Hart are gaslighting you, trying to convince you that you're losing your mind."

Roger regarded Holly coolly. "Yeah, they're sleeping together too. I know," he said, "so if that's all you came here to tell me-"

"What are you doing about it?" she interrupted him to ask.

"I'm in the process of figuring out exactly what to do," Roger replied. "Thanks for the warning, though. Really."

Roger hadn't been this standoffish toward Holly since after Acapulco, after he had learned that she had gotten him alone down there as part of some plan to test his fidelity to Alexandra, to whom he was married at the time, even though Holly had abandoned the plan before it ever really got off the ground, and they had ended up hashing out their disastrous first marriage, analyzing and realizing for the first time why it had failed, and he had finally apologized and she had finally forgiven him, for the rape, for cheating on her, for all of it.

"I didn't come here just to warn you about Dinah and Hart," Holly said.

"Is your husband going to be pounding on the door in a minute to punch my lights out?" Roger asked then. "'Cause I've gotta tell you, I'm really not in the mood for that today."

_The perfect opening._ "What I do and where I go is none of Fletcher's concern," Holly said.

"How do you figure that?" Roger asked.

Holly looked Roger right in the eye. "Because I filed for divorce this morning."

Roger's standoffishness disappeared in a look of pure shock as he stared at her again, his mouth open. "You're getting divorced?" he finally asked, surprised.

"Yes." She held his gaze.

"Why?"

"Why?" Holly echoed.

"Yes, why?" Roger persisted.

"Because marrying him was a mistake," Holly said, "one of the biggest mistakes I've ever made."

"Is that so?" Roger asked.

"Yes, that's so," Holly replied. She closed the distance between them until she was standing right in front of him. "I don't love Fletcher. I don't think I ever really did." Their eyes locked, she said, "The truth is, I love _**you**_, Roger."

"You love me," Roger said, sounding dazed.

"Yes," Holly said.

"But Fletcher was the safe choice," Roger said mockingly. "You thought I cheated on you, so you ran into his arms. I knew something had happened. I'm not stupid."

"I've never thought you were stupid," Holly said.

Roger stalked away from her, ranting all the while. "I screwed up by putting Spaulding ahead of us, but did you ever once stop and think? For God's sake, Holly, I wanted to marry you! The proposal was on the table! I was going to get a ring to go with it! I had changed enough by then that you were it for me. I didn't want any other women, and no matter how much I wanted Spaulding, I never would have slept with Alex to get it, but you were so sure that I had. I knew you'd been with somebody else, but I didn't know who. I only knew it wasn't Ross this time, because you wouldn't do that to our daughter. Not now."

He stopped by the window and turned to look at her again, and this time pain was radiating from his entire being as he gave her a wounded look. "I didn't care. I just wanted _**you**_. I just wanted to be married to_** you**_. And then at that awards banquet, that son of a bitch got right up in my face and told me it was him, told me that he had made love to you, and that was what he called it."

Holly wanted to strangle Fletcher for that, because that certainly had not been how she had seen that night. For her, it was partly about revenge on Roger and Alex both, and partly about wanting to feel something other than abject devastation over what she had thought at the time was Roger's betrayal.

Roger continued, "He was so smug about it, too, so self-righteous. So determined to prove that he was a better man for you than I could ever be." The pain radiating from him grew more pronounced. "He stood up on that damned balcony in front of the entire town and declared his love for you, and you went running into his arms after he did. Do you have any idea what that did to me, watching that and hearing that, seeing you with him like that? Knowing that you married him, that you hadn't said yes to me, but you married him..." He trailed off, swallowed so hard that she saw his Adam's apple bobbing up and down, and swiped at his eyes with one hand before turning his back to her and looking out the window.

Holly's own throat was aching because of the tears she was holding back. She crossed to the window and stood behind Roger, resting her hand on his shoulder and hoping he wouldn't shake off her touch. When he didn't, she said tearfully, "I was wrong. I was so wrong, about all of it. Yes, I thought Fletcher was the safe choice. But I've been a zombie since I married him. Stuffing myself into a mold that's his idea of what his wife should be like, not able to be myself. You're the only one who ever took me as I am, and didn't expect me to try to live up to some impossible ideal. You love me for who I am."

"That's the hell of it," Roger said, turning to face Holly once more. "Even after everything that's happened in the past year, I still love you."

Holly's heart soared at this. Roger still loved her!

"Loving you isn't the problem," Roger continued. "Trusting you is, because right now, at this moment, I don't trust you. I can't." He raked a hand through his hair. "When we were young and I lost you, I drove you away. But two years ago, I watched you walk away from me, and it damn near killed me. I was just completely gutted emotionally. I couldn't survive that again. I barely did the last time."

Holly's heart crashed at her feet then. She understood Roger's feelings. Ironically, she had felt that way about him many times before. If he had felt as sick inside, as fearful, as self-loathing as she felt right now, then she had a whole new appreciation for what he had been through when she was shooting him down and shutting him out in the past, because it was the worst feeling in the world.

At the same time, though, Holly was determined to make it work this time, to make Roger see that he was all she really wanted, and that she would never leave him again if he would only give her one more chance.

"Let me prove it to you," she said then. "Give me one chance to prove to you that if you take me back, this time it really will be forever. You won't lose me ever again."

Roger's mouth twisted in a wry half-smile. "This is a switch," he said. "Usually I'm the one pleading for another chance with you."

"And usually I'm the one whose heart and head are at war over what to do about you," Holly replied.

"What's that saying about walking a mile in another person's shoes?" Roger wondered.

"I will gladly walk in your shoes for as many miles as it takes for me to earn your trust again, because I want you back, Roger. I want _**us**_ back," Holly said fervently. "I was wrong not to believe you, not to believe in us, and I was wrong to cheat on you and I just kept making more and more wrong decisions. But that's done. I am so very sorry that I hurt you so deeply. But whatever it takes, no matter how long it takes, I'm going to make you see that we can make us work, and that this time it'll be for the rest of our lives...if you'll give me that chance. Will you?"

Roger looked at Holly for another long moment, so Holly looked back at him, her gaze steady and unwavering, and he saw in her eyes a blazing determination and an undisguised hope that he couldn't deny. He honestly didn't know if he could trust her again, but she had never come to him like this before. He knew her well enough to know that she was more serious about this, about them, than she had ever been before over all the years they had known each other, forever tangled, stumbling in and out of each other's orbits and lives no matter how many times they tried to stay away from each other or disavowed their feelings for each other. Roger had been honest when he told Holly loving her wasn't the problem. He had loved her since they were young, and he would love her beyond the end of his days. But if he ever got her back again, he couldn't live through losing her a third time.

But if there was any chance at all for them to get back together and never break up again, Roger had to take it, because life without Holly was no life at all.

"Yes," Roger said.

Holly's heart was no longer at her feet, but it wasn't quite back in her chest either; it was somewhere around her stomach. "Yes?" she asked hopefully, wanting to be certain she'd heard him right.

"Yes," Roger repeated firmly. She smiled then, and it was a smile that encompassed her whole face, chasing from her eyes the shadows of fear that had been so clear only a couple of minutes ago. He couldn't help the small smile he gave her in return. "The shoe is on the other foot now," he reflected. In the past, Roger had always been the one pursuing Holly, doing everything he could think of to get her to admit that she loved him, to get her to trust him, to get her to be with him. When he woke up that morning, the last thing he expected was for Holly to come to his door and tell him that she still loved him and wanted him back, and that she was divorcing that plaid-shirt-and-stupid-hat-wearing baboon she had married ten months ago.

"So it is," Holly said.

"I, ah...There's something you should know, in the interests of full disclosure," Roger said. "The reason that Dinah and Hart are gaslighting me and trying to drive me insane is because Dinah is angry at me for sort of...taking her trust fund."

Holly nodded. "How do you think I found out what they're really up to?" she asked. "I overheard them in the park, talking about it. Dinah mentioned that, and something about a Cayman Islands bank account where you put the money."

"She probably wants to take Hart down there and get the money and then celebrate locking me up in a mental hospital with him...since they're already sleeping together," Roger reflected.

Again Holly was unfazed. "That's their plan."

"You knew they were having an affair?"

"Considering the way Hart shoved his tongue down Dinah's throat, it couldn't have been anything else," Holly replied.

"Brazen little puppies aren't they, doing that right out in public now," Roger said.

"It was a deserted area of the park. They didn't know I saw and heard them," Holly replied, "which gives us the advantage."

"Us?" Roger asked.

"You're not going to let them get away with this," Holly pointed out. "You're already faking being gaslighted." She cautiously reached for his hand, and he let her take it. "Let me help you get proof of what they're doing."

"How?" Roger asked. "Leo's off sucking up to the Spauldings, and if I hire anyone else to tail them or bug Dinah's apartment, they could catch on easily. Dinah knows the usual suspects I pay for that kind of thing."

"So you don't pay one of the usual suspects. We go out of town and find somebody they don't know, and I pay for it. There has to be at least one top-notch private investigator in Bay City or Oakdale or Henderson," Holly replied.

"You're really going to help me with this," Roger realized.

"If you'll let me," Holly replied, praying that he would let her.

Roger seemed to be considering. Then he said, "I think we should leave Chrissy out of this until we have something definite. The last thing I want is for her to get caught in the crossfire. She'll have enough to deal with once Dinah and Hart have been exposed, because Ross will take Dinah's side no matter what. Our daughter is not going to be collateral damage."

"I agree completely," Holly said. She paused, then said, "About us...I don't think we should tell her that yet either."

"There's nothing to tell," Roger said. "Yet."

Holly clung to that "yet" with a figurative white-knuckled grasp. "It's just that we have the advantage over Dinah and Hart right now because they don't know that we know what they're really doing. Not that Blake would tell either one of them, but if no one knows that I'm trying to...well..."

"Win me back?" Roger inquired.

"Regain your trust so that we can have a future together," Holly corrected. "If we keep that just between the two of us until there _**is**_, hopefully, something to tell, then we will retain the element of surprise."

"I have to admit, no one would think that you would be helping me," Roger agreed.

"So we keep Blake out of the loop until we have something definite, and we work together to prove what Dinah and Hart are doing...with the help of a private investigator from out of town," Holly said.

"Agreed," Roger said.

"I'll make some calls," Holly said. "I'll get back to you as soon as I've found a private investigator we can trust."

"So first I trust the P.I., and then I trust you again," Roger said.

"I'll do everything in my power to make that so," Holly said earnestly. She retrieved her purse from the desk. "Are you going to be here later, or at the apartment?"

"Probably here," Roger replied. "They'll know downstairs if I am."

Holly nodded. "I'll call you later, then," she said.

"Okay," Roger agreed. She walked to the door and he followed her.

He opened the door, and she stopped and turned to face him once more. "We had something good once," she said. "We can have something great in the future. I know we can. I believe that, and I'm going to make you believe it too. I'm going to rebuild your trust in me, Roger, I promise."

"I hope you can," Roger replied, surprising both himself and Holly with his honesty. But he did hope that he could learn to trust Holly again. He wanted her back. But he had to be sure that she wasn't going to emotionally eviscerate him again. He wouldn't survive it a third time.

Holly looked at him again for a moment, seeming to be debating something, and finally she put her arms around his neck and gave him a careful hug. He hesitated, but then he put one arm around her waist, his heart racing at feeling her this close to him again after all this time, at feeling her arms around him. She held the hug for a moment, then stepped back. "'Bye," she said quietly.

"'Bye," Roger echoed. He watched her walk down the hall and disappear around the corner, then he went to the chest of drawers beside the bed, opened the middle drawer, and removed the framed photograph he had put there beneath his shirts. He sank down on the edge of the bed, and looked at the photograph cradled in his hands: he and Holly at Blake and Ross's wedding, after Holly had caught Blake's bouquet. Roger's eyes were twinkling in the picture, and he and Holly had matching mile-wide grins as she triumphantly held Blake's bouquet aloft.

They had been happy then. Could they be that happy again?

Could he trust Holly not to hurt him by leaving him for some other man, some safer, better-on-paper choice?

Time would tell.


	3. The First Steps

"Great! I'll be there in a little while," Holly said into the phone as an insistent knock came at her front door. "Goodbye." She hurriedly hung up the phone, checked her watch because she'd have to be leaving soon, and rushed to the door. When she opened it, Blake was standing there, with Kevin and Jason in their double stroller, Jason asleep and Kevin awake. "Blake!" she exclaimed.

"I know I've been busy with these guys," Blake said as she pushed the stroller past Holly and into the house, "but would you mind telling me why I had to find out you're getting a divorce from Fletcher, and why he asked Ross to represent him?"

"I've been busy," Holly said lamely, "moving back here, and filing the papers, and-" _And finding a private investigator to get the goods on Dinah and Hart because they're gaslighting your father and having an affair, and most importantly, I want your father back and I'm going to do everything possible to make him trust me and believe in us again. _But Holly couldn't tell Blake that, so she finished, "-and I'm actually just on my way out. I'm meeting with my lawyer in a little while." Technically that was true; the private investigator Holly had hired had recommended a lawyer in Bay City, and Holly and Roger were meeting with both the P.I. and the lawyer, who shared an office. It wasn't like there was much for her and Fletcher to divide up; she had moved in with him and Ben after the wedding, but kept her own house, just closed it up while trying to decide if she should sell or rent it, though she never did put much thought into that decision, thankfully. Now she had moved back home-back to the house that she had shared with Roger-and she had also kept her own bank account. Really all the divorce would entail was legally ending the marriage, and dropping 'Reade' from her name, and she should probably find another job. She didn't enjoy the _Journal_ nearly as much as she had enjoyed working at WSPR when she had worked there.

"Who is it?" Blake asked. "Please don't say Leo Flynn. He's become a Spaulding sycophant. I don't think he's even in touch with Dad at all anymore."

"Cass Winthrop," Holly replied.

"I don't know him. I'm not sure if Ross does," Blake said. "You're sure he's not some ambulance chasing creep?"

"Not according to the referral I got," Holly said. "I was going to tell you about the divorce after the meeting with my lawyer today. I didn't want to put you in the middle of anything."

"I can't say I'm sorry that you and Fletcher are splitting up," Blake said, picking Kevin up out of the stroller when he began to fuss. "You haven't been happy for a long time, Mom. You already look happier, and all you've done is file for the divorce."

_If you only knew why I look happier already. But you can't know yet. But when you can, I know you'll be happy for me and your father. _

"How about I come over for dinner tomorrow night?" Holly offered. "We can really sit down and talk, and I'll help you put the boys to bed before we do that."

"That would be great," Blake replied. "Ross is a little preoccupied with Dinah lately." _I'll bet,_ Holly thought. "I think all she's doing is spending Daddy's money and throwing the fact that she married him in Ross and Vanessa's faces (Vanessa Chamberlain Reardon was Dinah's mother). She only did it to tick them off. And I can't believe Daddy loves her."

_He doesn't. He loves me. He just doesn't trust me...yet._

Holly knew that this would require delicacy and diplomacy on her part, because she and Roger were in complete agreement that Blake not know anything until there was something definite for her to know.

Blake was gently swaying Kevin, and hadn't even noticed that Holly had slightly zoned out as she thought these things. Blake continued, "Of course, Ross won't hear one word against his sainted daughter. I'm just afraid he's riding for a really big fall where she's concerned, because sooner or later, she's going to do something that's going to force him to see her true colors. I've stopped trying to get him to see it, because all we ever did was fight about her, and I hate fighting with Ross. I've been so busy with Kevin and Jason anyway. He's going to have to find out for himself. I just hope he doesn't blame me when he does."

"Why would Ross blame you?" Holly asked.

"Okay, maybe not blame me, but hate that I was right about Dinah all along," Blake said ruefully. "I'm not planning to say 'I told you so.' I just... It seems like everything's such a mess, and I can't seem to come up with anything to do to make it better."

Holly put her arm around Blake's shoulders. "Oh, honey," she said sympathetically. "I've been there. I know how frustrating and maddening it is when you feel like that. You just have to hang in there and everything will work out the way it's meant to, for all of us."

"I really hope you're right, Mom," Blake said.

Holly glanced at her watch again. "I'm sorry to run out like this, but I really do have to get going," she said.

"Right, the meeting with your divorce lawyer," Blake said. Kevin was now asleep as well, and Blake strapped him back in the stroller. "Well, I won't hold you up. Good luck at your meeting. You can tell me about it tomorrow night. But do you mind if we just order in for dinner? These guys still aren't sleeping through the night, and I was never a very meticulous housekeeper anyway, so the house will be kind of a mess when you come over."

"I'll bring dinner myself," Holly promised, "anything you want."

Blake hugged her mother then. "I'd better get Kevin and Jason home for their nap. Jason fell asleep in the car on the way over here, and Kevin just went down, and hopefully I can lie down myself for 45 minutes or so until one or both of them needs something. I'll call you tomorrow afternoon about dinner. Will you be here or at your office?"

"Here," Holly replied, hugging Blake back. "I'll talk to you tomorrow, then."

"'Bye, Mom," Blake said.

Holly followed Blake outside and helped her load the sleeping boys into their car seats. After Blake had driven off with a wave, Holly hurried to pick up the purchase that the phone call she had gotten right before Blake arrived was about, and with it tucked safely in the secret compartment of her purse, she drove to the country club to pick Roger up.

The private investigator and the lawyer were both in Bay City, which was about a 35-minute drive from Springfield. On the drive, Holly told Roger about her visit from Blake, and what Blake had said.

Roger couldn't help himself; he was curious. "Is it going to be a big hassle? The divorce, I mean?"

"Not as much as in the past," Holly admitted. "I kept my house, and I've already moved back there. I kept a separate bank account. I think I unconsciously knew it wasn't going to last. Probably the biggest hassle is going to be finding another job. I don't see myself staying at the _Journal _much longer. My heart's not really in it. It never really was."

"What are you thinking of doing?" Roger asked.

"I'm not sure yet," Holly replied. "Exploring my options, I guess." She glanced at him before returning her full attention to the road. "Right now, I'm concentrating on getting the divorce and helping you prove what Dinah and Hart are doing. And most importantly of all, earning your trust again."

Roger was still wrapping his brain around the fact that Holly wanted him back and was determined to regain his trust so they had a future together. She had never been this serious or this resolute about him or about them before, and it would take some getting used to. He wanted to be able to trust her again; he wanted to be with her again. But he had to be sure this time that she wouldn't leave him for the next "good man" that came along.

"And Chrissy doesn't know about anything but the divorce?" Roger asked.

"There's nothing for her to know yet, is there?" Holly asked. "You don't trust me yet, and we don't have concrete proof of what Dinah and Hart are up to yet." She looked at Roger out of the corner of her eye.

He nodded. "I'm going to give the money back," he said then. "Dinah's trust fund. I shouldn't have taken it in the first place. I shouldn't have married her either." He rubbed at the back of his neck. "Marrying Dinah was..."

"A reaction to me marrying Fletcher," Holly replied matter-of-factly.

"Yes, and a big mistake," Roger said.

"We really have to stop doing that," Holly remarked. "Making big mistakes like marrying other people."

"Yes, we do," Roger agreed evenly.

They had arrived in Bay City now, and a few minutes later, they were walking through the front door of Cass Winthrop, Attorney-at-Law.

A redheaded woman a few years older than Blake was sitting at a desk in the outer office area. She looked up from her computer when she heard Roger and Holly walk in, and she stood up, greeting them with a warm smile. "You must be Ms. Lindsey," she said as she rounded the desk to greet them.

"Holly," Holly said, extending her hand to the woman.

"Frankie Frame," the redhead replied as she and Holly shook hands. Frankie looked at Roger then. "And that would make you Mr. Thorpe," she said.

"Roger," Roger replied, shaking hands with Frankie.

"Cass is in his office," Frankie said. "Follow me." She crossed the outer office area and knocked on a sliding wooden door that was slightly ajar. "Cass, our two o'clock is here!" she called before opening the door and walking in.

Cass Winthrop was tall and looked to be about seven or eight years older than Frankie, with dark, curly hair and a pair of reading glasses that he took off as he stood up from his desk and folded, putting them in his shirt pocket. He buttoned his collar button and cinched his blue-and-white-striped tie tightly again before pulling the navy blue suit jacket off the back of his chair and shrugging into it. He closed the file he was working on, and reached across the desk to shake hands with Roger and Holly as they introduced themselves.

"I understand we're dealing with two separate issues here," Cass began as he regained his seat. "Holly, you're getting a divorce and need a lawyer, and then you and Roger both want to hire Frankie to tail a couple of people."

"That's correct, yes," Holly said as she and Roger sat in the chairs in front of Cass's desk. Frankie was seated next to Cass's desk, pen and notebook at the ready to take notes.

"Why don't we start with the people you want me to tail, and why you want me to tail them," Frankie said.

"Their names are Dinah Marler Thorpe and Hart Jessup," Roger said. "Otherwise known as my wife and my son." He handed snapshots of Hart and Dinah to Frankie. She studied them intently for a moment, nodded, then reached for an empty manila folder on the corner of Cass's desk, tucking the snapshots inside it, after which she took Dinah and Hart's home and work addresses, their license plate numbers, and descriptions of their cars.

"She's cheating on you with your son, and you want proof for your divorce," Frankie said after she had finished taking down all that information.

"Well, that would be helpful," Roger admitted, "but that's not the main thing."

"Dinah and Hart are gaslighting Roger," Holly piped up then. "We need proof of what they're doing."

"Preferably something that would stand up in a court of law," Roger added.

Frankie started writing again, and while she was doing that, Holly happened to notice two of the framed photographs on the credenza behind Cass's desk: a wedding portrait of Frankie and Cass emanating pure joy and gazing adoringly into each other's eyes in a courtyard, and a picture of the two of them beaming with a giggling redheaded toddler girl perched half on Frankie's lap and half on Cass's lap. _They're married and have a daughter,_ Holly realized. She hadn't known that was the case when she had initially spoken to Frankie over the phone, and Frankie had recommended Cass when Holly had mentioned that she was looking for a divorce lawyer for herself.

Frankie looked up from her notes then. "Why are they trying to gaslight you? Other than wanting you out of the way so they can be together. Gaslighting someone is really sinister."

"It's complicated," Roger said, looking at Holly. She started to reach for his hand, then stopped herself, not wanting to push him. They looked at each other for a minute, Holly trying to gauge whether she should take Roger's hand, Roger trying to decide if he should let Holly take his hand. Cass and Frankie exchanged their own look at this; there was clearly a story here with these two people.

"Break it down," Frankie said encouragingly. Those three words broke the spell; Holly slowly, reluctantly rested her hand on the arm of the chair in which she was sitting, and Roger ducked his head, looking sheepish. It was one thing in Springfield, because everyone knew him there and expected the worst of him at all times. But this P.I. and this lawyer were, as far as Roger could tell, nice people who didn't know him. Frankie Frame did not strike him as the type that would bend or outright ignore the rules, or doctor any evidence in his favor, and in this case, he didn't want that. He wanted everything to be honest and aboveboard. As far as that went, Frankie was the right investigator for the job, but would she still take the case if she got to know the kind of man Roger was, if she came to see him the way everyone in Springfield did?

Roger looked at Holly again, and she met his gaze once more. "I married Dinah for all the wrong reasons. She's younger than our-my daughter," he hastily corrected himself. Again, Frankie and Cass both noticed this. "I do want to get out of it, yes. But I compounded my mistake by draining Dinah's trust fund, though I'm prepared to give back every cent. She knows where it is, which bank in the Cayman Islands I put it into, and she can have it."

"The problem is that she and Hart want to drive Roger crazy enough that he's in a mental hospital or psychiatric ward, and then go down to the Caymans and get the money," Holly said.

"And probably have a romantic vacation while they're at it," Cass said.

"Of course," Frankie agreed. She regarded Holly now. "You said when we spoke a few days ago that you heard them discussing this in the park, and they didn't know you were there."

"That's right," Holly said.

"Proving the affair will probably take less time than proving they're trying to gaslight you into a mental hospital," Frankie continued. "I'll get proof of both, but the infidelity will be enough for you to file for divorce, Roger."

"We definitely need proof of both," Roger agreed. "They think the gaslighting is working. They don't know that I'm onto them and faking being driven to the edge, or that Holly knows too, or that you're going to be tailing them to get evidence."

"And let's keep it that way," Frankie said. "The fewer people who know you're faking being gaslighted and I'm gathering evidence against Dinah and Hart, the better. What kind of time frame are we thinking here?"

Roger and Holly exchanged another look now. "As soon as possible," Roger said. "They've been gaslighting me for two months, and I'm letting them think it's working."

"You'll need to keep that up while I'm investigating them," Frankie said.

"Don't worry, I will," Roger said.

Frankie scribbled something else in her notebook, then looked to Cass and said, "Okay, Winthrop, you're up."

Cass put on his reading glasses once more and reached for the pen and legal pad he had standing by. "Frankie, Roger, if you'll excuse us," he began.

But Holly said, "They don't need to leave, Cass. There's nothing you could ask me that Roger can't hear, and the same goes for Frankie."

Cass paused for a moment, then said, "All right. Now, it's my understanding that you've already filed for divorce on the grounds of irreconcilable differences?"

"Yes, three days ago in Springfield," Holly replied. She then produced copies of the forms she had filled out at the Springfield courthouse and handed those to Cass.

He perused the forms, then dove into the questions, making notes on what she told him about assets, and that the only thing she really wanted was a legal end to the marriage and her last name legally changed back to 'Lindsey.' "How long do you think it will take until the divorce is final?" she asked.

Cass consulted the papers again. "Fletcher isn't contesting it?" he asked.

"No," Holly replied.

"Once he gets his copy of the papers and goes over them with his lawyer, it's mostly a matter of getting a date on the judge's calendar to have the final decree granted," Cass said. "You're not asking for spousal support, you have no joint assets that need to be divided or sold such as a house, cars, a joint bank account, no custody issues because there are no children. You do still have time to change your mind about things before the final settlement, and we'll need to meet with Fletcher and his lawyer at some point, just to make certain that we're all on the same page before we go before the judge. I don't know what the judges' calendars are like in Springfield, so I can't say for certain exactly how long it will take before you get a court date, but do you happen to know who Fletcher's lawyer is?"

"Ross Marler," Holly said.

"Ross is representing Fletcher?" Roger asked, surprised.

"Fletcher got to him before I did," Holly said. "It's fine, really."

"So much for family loyalty," Roger muttered.

"Family loyalty?" Cass asked.

"Ross is our-my son-in-law," Holly said. She looked at Roger. "You're not going to make this a thing with Ross, are you?" she asked.

"No," Roger replied. "I think Dinah will be enough of a thing."

Frankie consulted her notes now. "Dinah and Ross are related?" she asked.

"Ross is Dinah's father," Roger said. He waited for some kind of horrified reaction from Frankie, Cass, or both of them, but there was no reaction at all. "You're not shocked by this?" he asked after a moment.

Frankie waved a hand dismissively. "We've seen stranger things than that," she said.

"Yes, we have," Cass agreed. He set aside his legal pad, then took the papers Holly had given him to the outer office, where he copied them. He returned a moment later and gave the original papers back to Holly. "Once Fletcher receives his documents, he'll have thirty days to respond or risk a default judgment. Once he has responded, you and I will then schedule a meeting with Fletcher and his lawyer, so if you think you might change your mind about spousal support or anything else, it would be a lot less complicated all the way around if you would do that before we sit down with Fletcher and his lawyer."

Holly nodded her understanding. That was more than fair. The sooner she and Fletcher were divorced, the better off they would both be.

"I think that's everything for now," Cass said. "Frankie?"

"I have enough to get started," Frankie said. All four of them stood up and shook hands again. "I'll be in touch with a progress report in a week. If your contact information changes, let me know where to reach you."

"Thank you," Holly said. "Both of you."

"It's what we do," Frankie replied. She held the handshake with Holly for a few seconds longer than absolutely necessary, looked her right in the eyes, and said, "Everything is going to work out."

Holly was strangely comforted by Frankie's assurance.

"Thank you," Roger echoed.

"I'll be in touch," Cass told Holly.

"I look forward to hearing from you," Holly replied honestly.

After Roger and Holly had left, Cass said, "Well, that was interesting."

"There's a story there," Frankie mused.

"Definitely," Cass agreed. "They both slipped and said **_'our,'_** then corrected it to **_'my'_** when they mentioned their daughter and son-in-law."

Frankie nodded. "And did you see Holly start to reach for Roger's hand at one point and stop herself, and the way they looked at each other after that? It was like you and I weren't even here."

"He looked like he wanted her to take his hand, but he wasn't sure if he should let her," Cass said. He sat down in his chair, and Frankie sat in his lap and put one arm around his neck.

"He doesn't trust her," Frankie said. "She loves him, she wants to comfort him, and he wants to let her, but he's holding back because he doesn't trust that she's not going to hurt him again. She hurt him when she married this Fletcher guy, and he obviously married Dinah as a reaction to that."

Cass winced. "You really think so?" he asked.

"I really do," Frankie replied.

"Thank God you didn't do that," Cass said.

"Who was I gonna marry? Ryan? Please. You and Vicky and Donna all thought we were having some torrid affair, when all we were doing was trying to nail Carl and Signet," Frankie reminded Cass. "All along, Ryan just wanted to be with Vicky, and he only sent her away to keep her safe from Carl, and I just wanted to be with you."

"Well, Donna and Vicky were a lot more worried than I was," Cass said.

"Uh huh," Frankie said with a smirk. "You were the one that busted into that motel room and scared Signet away, totally ruining the stakeout Ryan and I were on. Vicky was in Switzerland at the time, and I don't know where Donna was, but she wasn't with you."

"And that's why I don't listen to Donna Love anymore," Cass said. "It was her fault. She was the one insisting that you and Ryan were at some motel on the interstate with vibrating beds and X-rated movies."

"Well, that's what she gets for listening to Ryan's answering machine," Frankie said. "We were there for a stakeout. And you were crazy jealous." She laughed at the memory, not for the first time grateful that she _**could**_ laugh about it now. She had been furious then, thinking that her best chance to expose the danger to Kathleen and get her out of Cass's life had just slipped through her fingers.

"I was," Cass admitted. "The thought of you with Ryan, with anyone else, made me feel like my insides were leaking out." He looked at her intently. "Trying to recapture the past with Kathleen was the biggest mistake I ever made."

"We got through it," Frankie reminded him, running her fingers through his hair. "You're the only man I've ever loved, Cass, and the only man I ever will love. It was true before Kathleen came back, it was true after she left town, and it will always be true."

"You are the love of my life, Mary Frances," Cass replied, "forever." After they kissed, Cass brushed Frankie's hair behind her ear and said, "I know that look."

"What look?" Frankie asked innocently.

"What look, she says," Cass said. "You're going to get the whole story on Holly and Roger, and do everything you can to help them find their way back to each other."

"It's good karma," Frankie said. "Besides, I remember what it felt like when you and I were in that place. It's hard. You need friends and family around you. If I hadn't had Ryan and Sharlene and Dean, and you hadn't had Felicia and Stacey, it would have been even harder for us than it already was."

"That's true," Cass replied. "Well, I'll do my part, and represent Holly in her divorce. It's going to come down to the two of them, though. She's the only one that can get him to trust her again."

"And maybe you could give Holly some advice on how to regain Roger's trust? You were in her position with me then," Frankie said.

"Only if she asks," Cass said.

After leaving Cass's office, Holly asked Roger, "Would you like to go somewhere and get a cup of coffee or something?"

"Okay," Roger agreed.

They were both silent on the drive, and when Roger saw a restaurant called The Harbor Club, he said, "Here?"

"Looks good," Holly replied. She pulled into the parking lot, and they went inside.

The Harbor Club was an upscale restaurant and bar. As it was only 4:00 PM, the place was mostly deserted, since it wasn't time for the dinner rush yet. After Holly and Roger were shown to a table, seated across from each other, and after they had ordered coffee, when they were alone, Roger said, "I think we need to establish some boundaries."

"Boundaries?" Holly asked.

"Back there, in Cass's office, you started to reach for my hand before I told them about Dinah's trust fund," Roger said. "You stopped yourself."

Holly smiled ruefully. "I wanted to take your hand, but I didn't want to seem like I was pushing too hard," she replied. "This is new for me."

"For me too," Roger said. After a beat, he said, "I wouldn't pull away. If you held my hand. I didn't pull away when you hugged me the other day." He folded his hands and rested them on the table. "I want us back too, Holly," he said. "I do. More than anything, I want us back. But if we're ever going to be together again, it has to be forever."

"I'm not going to change my mind and decide that I don't love you, or that I don't want to be with you," Holly said. "I've spent a lifetime fighting it, and I don't want to do that anymore." Now she did reach across the table, resting her hand atop his folded ones. "When we were together, before everything went to hell, that year was the happiest, the best, the most fulfilling time of my life."

"Mine too," Roger admitted.

"I love you, and I want to spend the rest of my life with you. No third parties, no secrets, no lies, no running away from each other no matter how upset or angry we get or what we think has happened, no jumping to conclusions, no assuming the worst and reacting destructively and thoughtlessly."

"You really think we can do that?" Roger asked.

"Yes," Holly said firmly.

"I need time," Roger said. "Time to be sure that you're not going anywhere, time to learn to trust you again, to trust that this is real, that I'm not imagining the whole thing...that Dinah and Hart's gaslighting isn't starting to work on me."

"It's not. It won't. We won't let it," Holly insisted. "You can have all the time you need. Just..." She unfolded his hands and threaded her fingers through the fingers of one of his hands. "Let me into your life. Let me prove to you that I mean everything I'm saying, that I've never meant anything more in my life, and that you _**can **_trust me not to hurt you like that ever again."

"We're both going to have to change," Roger said. "No secrets, no lies, no assuming the worst, no running away from each other. We both messed up. I let myself get blinded by the pursuit of Spaulding, and in the process I drove you away."

"We were both at fault, yes," Holly agreed anxiously. "What about Spaulding, though?"

"I think if we're ever going to have a real chance, I have to give up on it," Roger replied.

"I'm not making you choose," Holly said.

"I know you're not. I am," Roger said. "Spaulding is toxic. When has it ever really made me happy? When has it ever really been worth all the trouble?"

"Am I worth all the trouble?" she asked.

Roger looked deeply into Holly's eyes. "You are," he said. "You really are."

Roger and Holly were so engrossed in their conversation that they paid no attention when the door to The Harbor Club opened and a tall man about Roger's age, with a mane of dark blond hair shot through with fine strands of silver and wearing an impeccably tailored black suit and yellow tie, entered. The man scanned the restaurant with a slight frown, not finding who he was looking for, but then he saw Roger, who was facing the door, and he did a double take. _Could it be?,_ he wondered.

The man approached Roger and Holly's table, and peered at Roger critically, intently. "It _**is**_ you!" he exclaimed after careful scrutinizing Roger's face for several seconds. The exclamation wrenched Roger and Holly's attention away from each other and they both turned to look at the stranger staring at them in delighted surprise. "The one and only Black Fox! More of a Gray Fox now, I guess, huh?"

Roger's eyes lit with recognition, and his face took on the same look of delighted surprise. "Rotorhead?" he asked.

"You're the only one who ever called me that," the man said. "I was actually-"

"Hawk," Roger and the man said at the same time. "Yeah, well, you'll always be Rotorhead to me." Roger grinned, stood up, and shook hands with the man, then pulled him into a one-armed hug that the man returned.

"I wouldn't want to be anything but Rotorhead to you," the man said with a grin.

Holly looked at Roger and this man, fascinated. But she was completely blown away when the man looked at her and said, "Hello, Holly."

"How do you know my name?" she asked, looking from the man to Roger.

"I'd know you anywhere," the man replied, grabbing a chair from a nearby table and sitting down with Roger and Holly. "The Fox Head here and I told each other everything about the girls we left behind and vowed to one day return to. I'm really happy it all worked out for you and Roger."

Roger's smile faded now. "Ah, well, it, um, hasn't exactly all worked out yet, Rotorhead."

The man known to Roger as Rotorhead looked from Holly to Roger. "Are you trying?" he asked.

"Yeah," Roger replied.

Rotorhead rapped his knuckles on the table. "That's what matters," he said.

"Excuse me, but who are you, exactly?" Holly asked.

"I'm sorry," Roger said. "Holly, this is the best helicopter pilot in the history of the CIA, Michael Hudson. Michael, this is Holly Lindsey."

Michael smiled and shook Holly's hand. "It's nice to finally formally meet you after all these years, Holly," he said.


	4. An Old Friend

"So you two were in the CIA together," Holly said.

Roger and Michael looked at each other before both looking at Holly. "We were partnered up several times on assignments," Roger said. "Michael saved my life on more than one occasion."

"You returned the favor a few times," Michael reminded him.

"Well, thank you, Michael, for saving him," Holly said seriously.

"All in a day's work," Michael said. He looked from Roger to Holly. "Besides, we both had the same ultimate goal: surviving to get back to the women we loved. And as I recall, you and Roger have a daughter, Christina?"

"She goes by her middle name now, Blake, but I still call her 'Chrissy,'" Roger said. "She's married now, and has two baby boys."

"No kidding," Michael said. He grinned. "I'm a grandfather myself. Three boys between my two daughters."

"Two daughters?" Roger asked, pleased for his old friend.

"Victoria and Marley," Michael replied proudly. "Identical twins, but personality wise, total opposites."

"And is their mother the fair Donna?" Roger inquired.

"Yes," Michael said with a big smile.

"Congratulations," Roger said honestly. "That's terrific, Michael, really. You and Donna, married with kids and grandkids."

Now Michael smiled sheepishly. "Actually, we're not married," he admitted. "We were. Three times. And divorced...three times."

"I'm sorry," Roger said earnestly.

"No, we're together, and we're doing great," Michael assured him. "We're just not married. Neither one of us wants to go for divorce number four. So what brings you to Bay City?"

Recognizing that his old friend wanted a subject change, Roger said, "I'm in trouble." He looked at Holly now. "Holly and I just came from meeting with Frankie Frame."

"If you need a P.I., she's the best," Michael said. "What kind of trouble are you in, Roger? Can I be of any help?"

"My son and my soon-to-be-ex-wife are gaslighting me," Roger replied. "And I'm not sure if you can help."

Michael looked at Holly. "I'm not Hart's mother," she said.

"He probably would have turned out better if you were," Roger murmured. Holly wasn't so sure about that, but then Roger always did give her more credit for being a good mother to Blake than she gave herself.

"What, are they shacking up behind your back?" Michael asked.

"Does it count as behind my back since I know all about it?" Roger countered.

"I'd say no," Michael replied. He shook his head, then glanced from Roger to Holly and back.

"I love Holly, not Dinah," Roger said. He rubbed at the back of his neck.

"It's a long story, and it doesn't make either one of us look very good," Holly said.

"I'm the guy who married and divorced the love of his life three times and is currently living with her without benefit of clergy," Michael said. "I'm in no position to judge either of you, and I don't want to judge either of you. I just want to help, if I can."

Roger and Holly looked at each other. "I thought Roger had cheated on me," Holly began.

"I wasn't honest with Holly about where I was going that night, and I let myself get into a situation that made it look to Holly like I had cheated on her," Roger interjected.

"And I was so devastated that I cheated on Roger," Holly continued.

And so it went, Roger and Holly taking turns telling Michael the whole story of the past almost two years of their lives. He listened silently, patiently, noticing that each of them blamed themselves far more than blaming the other. "So I'm getting divorced," Holly finished.

"And I _**want** _to get divorced, but I need proof that Dinah's cheating on me, and that she and Hart are gaslighting me, and I need to return her trust fund to her," Roger concluded.

Michael nodded. "Who's your lawyer? Do you have one?" he asked Holly.

"Cass Winthrop," Holly replied.

"Then you two have nothing to worry about there," Michael said, looking from Holly to Roger. "Frankie will get the proof you need of both the cheating and the gaslighting, and Cass will handle the legalities." He then focused on Roger. "If you get to a point where you want them to think you really have flipped your lid, I can get you into a psychiatric ward without a problem."

"I don't really need the psychiatric ward, Michael," Roger said.

"I know," Michael said. "You wouldn't have to actually stay there. Just be there for a few minutes when Dinah and Hart come to visit, playing the dutiful wife and son. In reality, you can stay at The Bayshore, or some other hotel."

"You have an in at a mental hospital?" Holly asked.

"He has ins at all kinds of places," Roger said seriously. "The Berlin Wall would not have come down if not for this man. Where is this mental hospital?"

"Right here in Bay City," Michael said. "And it's not actually a mental hospital. The psych ward at Bay City General Hospital has a long-term care wing. My brother John is Chief of Staff of the hospital, so if you need to, you just let me know, and he'll get you into the long-term care wing for a couple of hours for Dinah and Hart's benefit."

"I may take you up on that, Rotorhead, but not just yet," Roger said.

"You would do that for Roger?" Holly asked. "And your brother would do that for Roger? It won't be a problem?"

"No problem at all," Michael assured. He looked at Roger again and smiled. "I know the reason is lousy, but damn, is it ever good to see you again."

"The feeling is mutual," Roger replied, smiling back.

"Michael, I have been waiting for you in my office for 45 minutes! What are you doing out here?" The trio at the table turned to look at the woman standing beside Michael's chair with her arms folded across her chest and a frown on her face. Her raven-colored hair was cut in a chic chin-length bob, her clothes were designer label, and her brown eyes flickered from Holly to Roger to Michael.

Michael stood up, and Roger did too. Michael then kissed the woman quickly, chastely. "I'm sorry, Donna. I was here 45 minutes ago, but I ran into an old friend and we got to talking, and I lost all track of time." He put an arm around her shoulders, then looked at Roger and Holly. "Donna Love, I'd like you to meet Roger Thorpe and Holly Lindsey. Roger, Holly, this is Donna, my..." He paused for the briefest of seconds, then concluded, "Significant other."

"Michael and I were in the Agency together years ago," Roger said as he shook Donna's hand. "I've heard a lot about you."

"All good, of course," Donna said. "Well, this is the first time I've ever met one of Michael's spy friends." Roger and Michael both looked amused at this. Donna then looked at Holly. "And you're Roger's wife?" she asked.

Before Holly could answer, Michael said, "She's his Donna. I heard as much about her and their daughter back then as Roger heard about you."

Donna grabbed an adjacent chair and pulled it up to the table next to Michael's chair as Michael and Roger took their seats again. "So, what brings you to town, Roger?" Donna asked. Then her face suddenly took on a look of terror. "You're not going back in the Agency, are you, Michael?" She looked from Michael to Roger and insisted, "Michael is _**not**_ going back in the Agency! The last time they dragged him back in, it ruined both of our lives, ended our marriage, and took us five years to work through!" She grabbed Michael's arm with both hands then and glowered at Roger fiercely. "Save the spiel about national security and the good of the country. Michael is retired from the CIA, so you can just go back to Langley or wherever and tell them to get somebody else."

"I'm not here to recruit him for the Agency," Roger said. "I didn't know he was here until he came over to our table an hour ago. I'm not with the Agency anymore either."

Donna palpably relaxed, but did not let go of Michael's arm. "Oh," she said. "Well. All right. Why are you here, then, if you don't mind my asking?"

"I'm in some trouble," Roger said. Donna tensed up again, so Roger hastily added, "Entirely of my own making, and Holly and I have hired Frankie Frame and Cass Winthrop, and we were telling Michael about it, and he has offered to help out if need be. But it's nothing dangerous."

"And it has absolutely nothing to do with the CIA?" Donna asked, staring hard at Roger.

"Nothing at all," Roger said. "I got out in late 1988, and I'm out for good. I have no reason or desire to go back."

"Well, now you've got me intrigued," Donna said, leaning in in anticipation. "What kind of trouble are you in? How is Michael going to help? How can I get in on this?"

"You don't have enough to do running this place?" Michael asked, gesturing around them.

"I can pull off subterfuge or create a diversion or look for files as well as anyone," Donna insisted.

"You and Victoria wearing berets and sunglasses and breaking into Lucas's suite seven years ago and then having to hide in the closet when he came back unexpectedly doesn't count," Michael retorted. "You were on probation at the time. You're lucky you two didn't get caught."

"Lucas?" Roger asked. "_**The**_ Lucas?" Holly frowned thoughtfully, trying to remember where she knew that name from, but it wasn't coming to her.

"Yeah," Michael replied. "He turned out to be one of the good guys after all. He took out Griffen Saunders right when Saunders had raised his gun to fire at me."

"You got Griffen Saunders?" Roger asked, impressed.

"I was trying to. Lucas got him before he could get me," Michael replied. "But you know who was a double agent? Ariane."

"I remember her," Roger said with a nod. "She had a thing for you."

Michael winced slightly. "Donna's sitting right here!" he said. "Anyway, I did _**not**_ have a thing for her then or ever, and she obviously got over it, since she was working with Saunders and she gave the order to have me killed, and it got her a 25-year stay in the penitentiary."

Roger shook his head. "I have to say, I don't miss Agency life," he said.

"Neither do I," Michael agreed. "But we did have some good times."

"Yes, we did," Roger said. He grinned, then looked at Donna. "Like that time in East Berlin."

"No," Michael said. "Not the time in East Berlin."

"What happened in East Berlin?" Donna asked.

"Yeah, what happened in East Berlin?" Holly echoed.

"You just had to bring up East Berlin," Michael grumbled at Roger.

Roger laughed. "Hey, it wasn't just you. I did it too."

"That's right, you did," Michael remembered.

"Did what?" Donna asked impatiently.

"Sang karaoke," Roger said. "Early '80s, the first karaoke bar in East Berlin. We had just finished a successful mission, so we went out to have a few drinks, and the place we went was this little hole in the wall dive with a karaoke machine crammed full of oldies."

"And that Russian guy with the fur hat kept singing Bobby Darin songs," Michael recalled.

"How'd we ever get the microphone away from him?" Roger asked.

"He was drunker than we were. He passed out in the middle of 'Mack the Knife,'" Michael said.

"Oh yeah!" Roger said as his eyes lit with recollection.

"So you two got drunk and sang karaoke at a dive in East Berlin?" Holly asked, resting her chin on one hand.

"Separately," Roger said. "We had to. We couldn't agree on a song."

"Well, you were just showing off, with your five choruses of 'Holly Holy,'" Michael said. "How you got through that song five times, as hammered as you were, without screwing up the words, I'll never know."

"I at least managed to get through the whole song, unlike you, who broke down crying during the first verse of 'Donna,'," Roger retorted.

"I told you, it was Donna's birthday," Michael said. "Are you telling me if it had been Holly's birthday, you wouldn't have broken down crying? I was three sheets to the wind. I always get maudlin when I get drunk. Not that I get drunk nowadays," he added hastily, looking at Holly.

"No, I'm sure I would have broken down crying if it had been Holly's birthday, or Chrissy's, but it wasn't," Roger said. "Although I have to say, you do the best drunk Ritchie Valens I've ever heard."

"I think you said so that night," Michael said. Then the two men broke into laughter.

Holly found Roger and Michael's interaction fascinating. She had never seen Roger so at ease with a contemporary before. He and Michael were clearly friends, and though they hadn't seen one another in many years, the bond they had forged when they worked together and saved each other's lives years before was irrevocable, and strong enough to carry over to their civilian lives despite all the time and distance.

For her part, Donna had only ever seen Michael behave like this with one other person: his brother John. But while John and Michael had a good relationship now, that had not always been the case, especially when Michael thought John was romantically interested in Donna. He wasn't, but that had caused quite a rift between the brothers. Michael was completely comfortable with Roger in a way he had never been with John, because they had their dynamic as brothers, with Michael forever the older brother and John forever the younger one. They had come very far since Michael had found John and brought him home, but the brotherly dynamic underscored their entire relationship, even now that they were on the best terms of their lives since they were children. Donna herself had never had a close female friend; her own contemporaries in Bay City were civil to her, for the most part, especially Rachel Cory, since they shared grandchildren, but she was not actually friends with any of them. Even with only seeing them together for these few moments, Donna knew that Roger was a good and dear friend to Michael.

Roger and Michael recovered themselves. Roger saw Holly watching him fondly, and he gave her a small smile in return. Donna noticed this and not-so-subtly elbowed Michael in the ribs under the table. Michael, of course, had seen it for himself. Having already heard the story of the last two years from Roger and Holly before Donna joined them, Michael knew that Holly wanted Roger back, and that Roger wanted to be with Holly, but what Roger hadn't said, and Michael knew anyway because he'd been there himself with Donna once upon a time, was that while Roger loved Holly, he didn't trust her at the moment. He was still hurting from her marrying this other guy.

But knowing Roger as well as he did, and knowing that Roger loved Holly the way Michael himself loved Donna, Michael also knew that Roger _**wanted**_ to trust Holly again. That was the key here.

Well, that, and both of them getting divorced, and nailing Roger's son and soon-to-be-ex-wife for trying to gaslight him, and Roger returning the trust fund he stole from said soon-to-be-ex-wife. That was the part that Michael could help with.

Michael pulled his wallet from his inside jacket pocket then, opening it and removing a couple of his business cards from it. "Do you have a pen?" he asked Donna.

"I do," Holly said as she pulled a pen from her purse and handed it to Michael.

"Thanks," Michael said. He turned one of the cards over and wrote something on the back of it, then shoved it, the pen, and the other card across the table to Roger. "My office number is on the front of the card, and my home number is on the back. Give me your numbers too. You need anything at all, any time of day or night, all you have to do is pick up the phone. And I'm a good listener."

"I remember," Roger said as he scribbled his contact numbers on the back of the second card and pushed it across the table to Michael before returning Holly's pen to her. "That, I'll definitely take you up on, Rotorhead."

"'Rotorhead'?" Donna asked, eyebrows raised.

"A nickname," Roger said.

"You know I flew helicopters in the Marines, and I also did some flying for the Agency," Michael said.

"That was your code name?" Donna asked. At Michael's look, she said, "What? I watched _Scarecrow and Mrs. King_."

"No, that wasn't his code name," Roger said. "That's just what I called him after he pulled my, ah, bacon out of the fire a couple of times with his helicopter."

"So what _**was**_ your code name?" Donna asked interestedly. "You never talk about your CIA days. I never even knew you _**had**_ a code name."

"Hawk," Michael said. "My code name was Hawk."

"And what was yours?" Donna asked, turning to Roger.

"He was The Black Fox," Michael replied.

"Hawk, Black Fox, were all the code names after animals?" Donna asked.

"No," Michael said. "We had two of the better code names. Some agents were not so lucky." Michael looked at Roger again. "Remember Chunks?"

Roger made a face. "I hated being paired with him on missions," he said.

"'Chunks'?" Holly asked.

"Every time he got nervous or scared, he threw up," Roger said. "Once in Poland, he got sick so many times, he almost dehydrated."

"He threw up in my helicopter once too," Michael recalled. "Took two weeks to get the smell out."

"And Pyro," Roger said.

"As in 'pyromaniac'?" Holly asked.

"Yeah," Roger said.

"He's still in," Michael said. "I still don't get why they didn't kick him out when he found out. But if you needed a fire set anywhere, he was the guy."

"He could make it look like arson or an accident," Roger said. "That's why they kept him. And probably promoted him to bureau chief at some point."

"They did," Michael said.

"Well, if he ever gets fed up with the job, we know how it'll end," Roger said.

"With a five-alarm fire," Michael agreed with a nod.

"And Pyro standing in the shadows, watching it burn and muttering about how pretty it looks," Roger added.

"Excuse me, Ms. Love," said a young man in a plain white polo shirt and black Dockers who had materialized behind Donna's chair. "There's a problem that needs your attention."

"Excuse me, everyone," Donna said, rising and following the man. "What's the problem, Robert?" she asked as they walked away from the table.

After Donna had left to take care of whatever the problem was, Roger said, "So Donna runs this place?"

"Runs and owns it," Michael replied, pride evident in his tone. "She's good at it too, and really enjoys it. What are you up to these days, Fox Head? Where are you living now?"

"Springfield," Roger said.

"That's not far from here! That's great!" Michael enthused. "You busy workwise?"

"Not really," Roger said.

"I've got this deal coming up, and I'd love to get your input on it," Michael said. "Computers. Specifically, the Internet. Yahoo."

"I don't know anything about that," Roger admitted.

"Neither do I," Michael said. "But we can learn. If nothing else, it'll be a good distraction for you."

"Okay," Roger agreed.

"Great," Michael said. "So you can come by my office sometime next week and we can go over everything I have so far."

"All right," Roger said.

Donna returned then. "I'm sorry about that," she said. "Although Robert is authorized to sign for deliveries, the new delivery man insisted that I had to be the one to sign for this one." She looked at Holly then. "What do you do?" she asked.

"Publisher of the Springfield _Journal_, but I'm looking to get out of it," Holly replied.

"You work with an ex or something?" Donna asked. "I did that for a while. Very awkward and uncomfortable."

"Yes," Holly said.

"And you, Roger? What do you do?" Donna asked.

"I'm looking for something new too," Roger said. "Something in business."

"It looks like Roger and I are going to be working together on my new project," Michael replied.

"In addition to whatever kind of trouble he's in that you're going to be helping him with?" Donna asked.

"Yes," Michael said.

"So what kind of trouble are you in?" Donna asked Roger then. "You never did tell me."

"Donna," Michael said warningly.

"I just want to know if I need to have bail money at the ready," Donna said. "And we should probably also alert Ryan that you might be arrested at some point if that's going to happen. Ryan is our son-in-law. He's the police commissioner."

"I don't think we need to involve Ryan in this," Michael said. "And you won't need to have bail money at the ready."

"You say that now, but how am I supposed to be sure of that if I don't know what you're helping Roger with?" Donna inquired.

"It's okay, Michael," Roger said. "My son and my soon-to-be-ex-wife are having an affair and they're gaslighting me, but I'm on to them."

Donna blinked. "But Michael said that Holly is to you what I am to him."

"She is," Roger said. "We...Well, it's a long story."

"Which he doesn't have time to go into right now because your dinner rush is starting," Michael pointed out.

"Michael," Donna said in an I-want-to-know-now tone.

"Donna," Michael retorted in the same tone.

"We'll bore you with the story some other time," Holly piped up then.

"Really?" Donna asked.

"You don't know what you just said, Holly. Now she'll keep after you until you tell her," Michael said. "She's part pit bull, I swear." Donna swatted at Michael, but there was no strength or intent to hurt him behind it.

"I'll hold you to that," Donna said, ignoring Michael.

"She will," Michael added.

"I think we're going to be spending a lot of time in Bay City in the near future," Holly said. "I'm sure the subject will come up again. In the meantime, we should get going, since it's your dinner rush and all."

All four of them stood up then. "Hang in there, Fox Head," Michael said. "Between you and Holly, and Cass and Frankie, and me, we'll get you out of this."

Roger shook hands with Michael again, then clapped him on the back. "I'm really glad we ran into each other today," he said.

"So am I," Michael said. "I'll give you a call in a few days to set things up for next week, or you can call me before that if you want or need to."

"Thanks," Roger said.

"It was nice meeting both of you," Donna said.

"It was nice meeting you too," Holly said. She shook hands with Donna.

"Yes, it was," Roger added. He too shook hands with Donna. After they said goodbye to Michael and Donna, Roger and Holly left.

When they were alone, Michael said, "If Holly doesn't want to go in to a lot of detail about it, don't push her."

"Really, Michael, I know that," Donna said, annoyed. "If anything, I can be a sympathetic ear...no, an empathetic ear...for Holly."

"Donna, I love you, but empathy is not exactly your strong suit," Michael said.

"But it won't require any work this time, because I've already had the similar experiences," Donna pointed out. "You know, they remind me a lot of us when you came back to town. The feelings were still there, the love, but you didn't trust me. You had to learn to trust me again. Clearly, Roger and Holly love each other. But he has to learn to trust her again." At Michael's somewhat surprised look, Donna said, "I know something about that. Besides, while you're off playing with Roger, I might as well get to know Holly."

"Okay, Roger and I are not going to be 'playing,'" Michael said. "We're going to be working on that new project-"

"Yes, Whoopee," Donna said.

"Yahoo," Michael corrected.

"Whatever," Donna replied. "But Roger obviously means a lot to you. You aren't even that way with John, and he's your brother."

"What way?"

"The way you just were with Roger. All laughing and bonded and obviously thrilled to see each other after how many years. All I'm saying is that if you're going to be spending a lot of time with Roger, it only makes sense for me to get to know Holly." When Michael opened his mouth, Donna added, "And I promise, I will not push her to tell me a lot of sordid details." She added, "If she doesn't want to," under her breath.

"I heard that," Michael pointed out. Donna merely smiled in reply.

Meanwhile, Roger and Holly were on their way back to Springfield. "Michael's nice," Holly said.

"He's one of the good guys, no doubt about it," Roger replied.

"How many times did he save your life?" she asked.

Roger thought for a moment. "Four," he said. "And I saved his life three times."

"It sounds like he's a good man to have around, then," she said. "You obviously think a lot of him."

"I really do," Roger admitted. He paused, then said, "You don't have to tell Donna anything if you don't want to."

"She's a bit nosy, true, but she also strikes me as the kind of person who speaks her mind and doesn't care what anyone thinks of what she says," Holly reflected. "If anyone would be shockproof, I get the feeling it would be her. She and Michael have been married and divorced three times."

"The way Michael always talked about her, that doesn't surprise me. She was it for him," Roger said.

"Kind of like us," Holly replied, glancing at him before returning her attention to the road.

"Kind of," Roger agreed. "But then, Michael always was the type that if he wanted something, he wouldn't stop until he got it, no matter what it took."

"An admirable quality," Holly said.

"Very much so," Roger agreed. "That was one reason we bonded. Michael's the only other agent I ever met who had somebody he wanted to get back to more than anything in the world."

"Do you still feel that way about me?" Holly asked.

"Yes, I do," he replied. "It's like I told you. Loving you isn't the problem. I'll love you beyond the end of my days. I just have to be able to trust you again, because I can't, I _**won't**_, go through you leaving me again for some man that's better than me."

"There _**is**_ no one better than you. Not for me," Holly said. "_**You're**_ the one I want, Roger. The _**only**_ one I want to be with."

"As long as that doesn't change," Roger said.

"It won't," Holly replied. "Who's Lucas?"

"Lucas," Roger said. "We thought he was involved in some shady doings, but it turned out he wasn't. Whatever Griffen Saunders had on him was unrelated to the espionage Saunders was performing for the KGB in Europe. He went on to become a hotshot PR man, known only by his first name, Lucas. He was killed a few years ago."

"I think I remember seeing something about his death at the time," Holly said with a nod. "I'm having dinner with Blake tomorrow night, spending some time with her and the boys, although they're still in that sleeping-a-lot stage."

"That'll be nice, spending time with all of them," Roger said. "I'll have to get to that myself soon, though I'm sure I'm not welcome at their house, at least as far as Ross is concerned. But you were right when you said we'd be spending a lot of time in Bay City, since Frankie and Cass live there, and Michael."

They had arrived at the country club now, and Holly turned off the car and turned to look at Roger. "So..." she said.

"Yeah," Roger said, meeting her gaze. They sat in silence for a moment, looking at each other, and then he said, "I'm not looking for anybody else. You don't have to worry about that. It's you or no one. So right now, it's no one."

Holly smiled. "That's good to know," she said.

Roger reached across the console, took Holly's hand from the top of the steering wheel, and squeezed it. "I'll call you tomorrow," he said.

"Okay," Holly replied. "I'll talk to you then."

When she got home, she retreated to her bedroom, removed the purchase she had picked up on her way to pick Roger up to go to Bay City, and looked it over carefully, just as she had in the store. After scratching out the prices, she folded the receipts and carefully tucked them into the box with the purchase. "Someday," she said aloud as she put the box in the drawer in her nightstand. "Someday."


	5. Visits With the Marlers and Michael

Kevin and Jason were both screaming their heads off when Holly arrived at Blake and Ross's house the next evening with a large mushroom and sausage pizza. Blake, frazzled herself, had Kevin strapped to her chest and Jason in her arms when she opened the door to her mother. Holly immediately put the pizza on the coffee table, took Jason from Blake's arms, and headed to the nursery with him.

"What's all the fuss about, hm?" she asked. She checked his diaper and found that he needed to be changed. "Ah. No wonder you're protesting so loudly." After she had changed him, she carried him to the bathroom, where she gently wiped his red, tear-stained face with a cool washcloth. The two-month-old, exhausted from his outburst, wearily laid his head on her shoulder. She gently rubbed his back. "There, that's better," she said. She returned to the nursery, talking softly to Jason as she walked the floor with him. "Boy, does this bring back memories. I spent so many nights walking the floor with your mommy when she was a baby. I have to say, you're calming down a lot sooner than she did. Must get that from your dad. You certainly didn't get it from me, or from your grandpa. You look a lot like your grandpa, though. Dark hair, brown eyes." Jason gurgled then. "Yeah," she said. "Your grandpa is crazy about you and your brother. He'd be here tonight if he could. The day will come when Grandpa and I will come and see you and Kevin together. At least, I hope it will. There's nothing I want more than to be with your grandpa for the rest of my life. Your mommy doesn't know about this yet, but I know you'll keep my secret, won't you, Jason?" Jason was now asleep on her shoulder. "Yeah, you'll keep my secret," she mused. "I'm not sure if I bored you to sleep or soothed you to sleep. I'm going with soothed you to sleep." She gently kissed his cheek, settled him in his crib, and, snagging the nursery monitor from the top of the dresser by the lamp with the shade made of plastic balloons in green, red, blue, and yellow, returned to the living room, where she found Blake restlessly swaying a still-fussing Kevin.

"Is Jason asleep?" Blake asked.

"Yes," Holly replied.

"You are a miracle worker," Blake replied. She had removed Kevin from the sling she was wearing and was holding him now, swaying him.

"Kevin just doesn't want to sleep, huh?" Holly asked.

Blake sank down on the couch wearily. "He hates sleeping," she said.

"You were the same way," Holly said. She reached over and rubbed Kevin's back, which made him fuss harder. "Okay, Grandma gets the message," she said. "You only want Mommy."

"I grew out of it eventually, right? Now I_** love** _sleeping. I just don't get to do it on a regular basis anymore," Blake said. "How long was it before I grew out of hating to sleep?"

"Well..." Holly hedged. "You started sleeping through the night when you were three."

"Three _**years**_ old?" Blake asked, horrified.

"But you started sleeping for longer stretches by the time you were six months old," Holly added hastily.

Blake looked slightly relieved. "Longer than two hours, you mean?"

"Sometimes as much as five hours," Holly said.

"Five hours," Blake said dreamily. "That's how I know I'm a mom now: it used to be the first thing I'd want to do with five uninterrupted hours was S-E-X. Now the only thing I want to do with five uninterrupted hours is sleep." Kevin fidgeted in Blake's arms. "I don't think he's going to go down for a while. You'd better bring the pizza in here, Mom. Otherwise we'll be eating it cold. And grab me a ginger ale out of the fridge to drink, please."

Holly returned with the pizza, a handful of napkins, Blake's ginger ale, and a bottle of water for herself. She set the pizza box on the coffee table, flipped it open, and since Kevin went into full-throttle screaming when Blake tried to put him in his swing, Blake had to eat one-handed because she had to still hold him.

"So how was the meeting with the divorce lawyer?" Blake asked when Kevin had settled down to minor whimpering once more.

"It went well," Holly replied. "It's not really going to be that complicated, thankfully."

"That's good," Blake said. "You seem happier now than you've been in a long time, Mom, and a lot more hopeful, and it's really good to see."

"I am," Holly assured her daughter. "Happier and more hopeful. That's definitely true."

Kevin really started crying again, and Blake looked like she was about to cry herself. "It's too early for teething, right?" she asked her mother.

"Yes," Holly said. "He's only two months old."

Ross arrived home then from his late meeting. After kissing Blake hello, he took Kevin out of her arms. "Such a fussy boy," he said, gently bouncing Kevin. "Hello, Holly," he said.

"Hello," she said. "Yes, Kevin's very fussy tonight. Jason's asleep, though."

"That's usually how it goes," Ross said. "Kevin's not a big fan of sleeping." Kevin snuggled against Ross's chest, right over his heart, the sound of his father's heartbeat soothing his cries somewhat.

Jason awoke crying then. Blake noticed the time and said, "Oh, he needs to be fed! Excuse me," and hurried off to the nursery to nurse Jason.

Holly started cleaning up the leftovers of dinner, and Kevin finally exhausted himself enough that he fell asleep against Ross's chest. Ross eased himself down on the couch with the sleeping Kevin in his arms. "I hope you're not angry about my representing Fletcher in the divorce," he said softly. "It's just that he showed up at my office at lunch the day you two decided to end the marriage, and asked me to be his lawyer, and you know that he and I go way back, and he was just really pushing, saying he wanted this resolved as soon as possible..." Ross trailed off.

"We both do," Holly said. "No, Ross, I'm not angry with you. We're family. I think it's more important that we're family and you and I are friends than it is that you represent me in this divorce."

"I agree," Ross said. He looked at Holly contemplatively. "You seem lighter than you've seemed in a long time," he said.

"I _**feel**_ lighter than I have in a long time," Holly agreed.

"You know, the last time I saw you this much at ease, you were with Roger," Ross said.

Holly was careful to keep her voice neutral and her eyes on cleaning the crumbs off the coffee table. "Are you asking me something?" she said. "And if so, are you asking as my friend, or Fletcher's lawyer?"

"I wasn't asking anything, I was just making an observation," Ross replied. "Fletcher isn't planning to respond to your filing for divorce with a charge of adultery."

"There's no reason for him to do that. Adultery is not involved," Holly said.

"Just irreconcilable differences," Ross said.

"Yes," Holly said. She took the trash out to the kitchen, and then returned to the living room.

"So, about that observation I made a few minutes ago," Ross said when she returned.

Holly pushed her hair off her forehead. "If you're asking if Roger and I are back together, the answer is no," she said as she sat down in the chair.

"I figured that. Blake isn't bouncing off the ceiling in jubilation," Ross replied. "But I also know _**you**_, Holly. You and Roger are like a magnet and steel. You always have been, and you always will be. And you at least know how to handle Roger...or at least, you know how to handle him better than anyone else."

"Anyone else like, say, Dinah?" Holly inquired evenly, sensing where this was going. _Oh, if you only knew that your daughter is not as innocent as you believe, Ross,_ she thought.

"It's no secret that Dinah and Roger did not marry for love," Ross replied. "Roger has only ever loved you. And you love him." Holly didn't deny these truths. "But in order to truly make another go of it with you, Roger would have to divorce Dinah, and she would be infinitely better off."

_I wonder if you'd think that if you knew she's sleeping with Hart,_ Holly thought. "So you're what, sanctioning my breaking up Roger's marriage to Dinah?" Holly asked.

"Do you want him back?" Ross countered. "Because if he knew you wanted him back, he'd drop Dinah like a hot potato."

"Roger's not a cheater," Holly said.

Ross snorted. "Your memory can't be _**that** _short," he said. "Does Acapulco ring any bells?"

"We did not sleep together in Acapulco," Holly said firmly.

"But he was cheating on Alexandra anyway," Ross pointed out. "If Roger were to cheat on Dinah with you, and Dinah found out about it, she'd have grounds for divorce. She's too proud to stay with a man she knows is cheating on her."

_But apparently she's not too proud to stay with a man and gaslight him while she's sleeping with his son. _Blake was right, Holly realized; Ross was indeed riding for a big fall where Dinah was concerned, and it was going to really hurt him when he learned exactly what she had been up to these past few months. "Ross, I understand how desperate you are to get Dinah away from Roger, but do you really think my being the other woman is the best way to accomplish that?"

Blake returned then. "Jason ate, burped, I changed him, and he went right back to sleep," she reported. When she saw Kevin sleeping against Ross's chest, she sagged against the wall with relief. "Kevin's asleep, too?" she asked. "For how long?"

"About 10 minutes," Holly said.

"Do you think he's asleep enough that you can put him down now and he'll stay asleep for at least a couple of hours?" Blake asked hopefully.

"I can try," Ross said. He carefully got up from the couch and carried Kevin to the nursery to put him in his crib.

Blake sank down wearily on the couch. "You're exhausted. I should go," Holly said.

"I'm not trying to push you out the door, Mom," Blake said apologetically, "but yes, I could really use some sleep."

"Then I'll let you get some," Holly said. She and Blake hugged goodbye. "Don't get up. I can show myself out. Sleep while you can, honey. And tell Ross I said good night."

By the time Ross returned from settling Kevin in his crib, Blake had fallen asleep on the couch, so Ross carried Blake to their bed so she could get some much-needed.

While Holly was with Blake and the boys and Ross, Roger went to Bay City, to Michael's office, having spoken to him on the phone earlier that day. They looked over what Michael had on the Yahoo deal, but Michael could tell that most of Roger's mind was elsewhere, so when they had gone over the preliminaries on that particular project, Michael set everything aside and said, "Okay, Fox Head, let's talk."

"About what?" Roger asked.

Michael just looked at him. "Roger. It's me."

Roger shifted in his chair. "Nothing gets by you, does it," he said rhetorically.

"You look like you have something on your mind. Something unrelated to business," Michael replied.

"Holly," Roger said. "Whenever I'm not thinking about the mess I'm in, I'm thinking about her."

"Spoken like a man in love," Michael said. "Coffee?" he offered.

"Please," Roger said. "Black is fine."

Michael got them both cups of steaming hot coffee before resuming his seat behind his desk. Roger took a sip, then said, "I _**am**_ in love with Holly. That's not the problem. Trust is the problem."

"You trusting her, or her trusting you?" Michael asked before taking a sip of his own coffee.

"Me trusting her," Roger admitted.

"Her trusting you is not an issue?" Michael asked.

"Not as far as Holly's concerned," Roger replied. "At least she hasn't said anything about not trusting me. Which is kind of ironic, because it was her not trusting me that broke us apart two years ago, although I didn't really give her a good reason to trust me then. I said one thing and did another, and you know what they say about actions speaking louder than words."

Michael winced. "This sounds painfully familiar," he said.

"In what way?" Roger asked, puzzled. He had always thought that Michael was so much more together than he was. He couldn't imagine Michael getting into the kind of mess with Donna that Roger had gotten into with Holly because of his unholy pursuit of Spaulding. He lied to Holly, she jumped to the wrong, but only, conclusion his actions caused her to reach, and in the end, he was left with nothing-no Spaulding, and far worse than that, no Holly.

"You saw how freaked out Donna got when she thought you were there to drag me back into the Agency," Michael began.

"Yeah, but I thought that was because she didn't want you getting shot or worse," Roger said.

"That was part of it, but that wasn't the main reason she got so upset," Michael continued. "When I got dragged back into the Agency for one last mission six years ago-"

"Griffen Saunders?" Roger interrupted.

"Yeah," Michael said. "I didn't tell Donna that's what I was doing."

"Unless they've changed the rules, you _**couldn't** _tell her what you were doing," Roger pointed out.

"I'm actually going somewhere with this, if you'll stop interrupting me every ten seconds," Michael said.

"Sorry," Roger said contritely. "Please, continue."

"You know how dangerous Griffen Saunders was," Michael continued. Roger nodded. "Between that and the need for secrecy, I had to come up with some kind of cover story so that Donna would understand why I was moving out on her, and so she'd stay away while I was on this mission. Ariane was the person the Agency sent to recruit me for the mission, before anyone knew that she was actually a double agent. So I lied to Donna that I was having an affair with Ariane."

When Michael went silent for a long moment, Roger said, "Can I talk now?"

"You can."

"I know you needed a cover story, but that was really stupid."

"Yes, it was," Michael agreed firmly. "Because on the occasions I saw Donna in public, or with our daughters, I was purposely mean to her, a real jerk, and that's putting it mildly. She was hurt and confused and didn't understand why I was doing this, but after a couple of months she accepted that I must want this other woman, so then she was hurt and angry. It took almost five months to get Saunders...and Ariane...and I was so relieved when it was over. I was also incredibly naïve, because I thought I could just go home and explain to her what had actually happened, and she'd welcome me back with open arms and we could just put the whole thing behind us and pick up where we left off."

"I'm guessing that's not what happened," Roger said.

"When I showed up at home at 2:00 in the morning after Saunders was in the morgue and Ariane was in police custody and I had been debriefed, Donna was not the least bit happy to see me," Michael said.

"Could you blame her? She thought you'd been stepping out on her and sleeping with Ariane for almost half a year, and you'd been a jerk to her every time you saw her all that time," Roger said.

"I was not aware enough at the time to be anything but hurt that she wasn't letting me come home yet," Michael admitted. He held up a hand to forestall what Roger was about to say next. "I know, I know. It was short-sighted and self-centered of me, and when she opened the front door, I should have crawled in on my hands and knees, begging her forgiveness."

"Yes, you should have," Roger agreed. "So what _**did** _happen? I take it this was the cause for one of your divorces?"

"The last one," Michael said with a nod. "Several months later. That's how long it took me to find out that the night I came home and finally told Donna the truth, she had another man upstairs in our bed."

Roger knew that kind of pain firsthand, although Fletcher had never been in his and Holly's bed, to Roger's knowledge. He decided in that moment if Fletcher _**had** _been in their bed, he didn't want to know about it.

"We got back together, but things started spiraling out of control. It was only that one night, but the guy was a real snake, and he blackmailed her. Our daughters found out, and then I found out, when Donna confessed to shooting a man because she thought our daughter Marley had done it. The affair came out on the stand at the trial. Then I was the one who was hurt and angry. I filed for divorce while Donna was in jail. She wasn't there long, though, because she didn't shoot the guy, and neither did Marley. Donna only said she did it because she was so certain Marley had done it, and she would rather have gone to jail herself for the rest of her life than let Marley spend one night behind bars for shooting her rapist."

Now Roger winced.

"And yes, I was hurt and I was angry about Donna cheating on me, even though it was just that once," Michael said, "but the person I was angriest at was myself, because I drove her to it. I couldn't tell her the truth about what I was doing. Her life would have been in danger if she had known. I went with the first, most clichéd cover story that came to mind, because she saw me with Ariane around town, so when Donna assumed that Ariane was the other woman, I did nothing to correct that assumption. I was awful to her, even though it was killing me inside, and no one understood why I was doing this-not Donna, not our girls, not my brother. If I had come up with something else, anything but making Donna believe that I was cheating on her, that I cheated first, then maybe she wouldn't have been so hurt and angry, and after all those months so lonely, that she went to bed with another man. The fact that she did is just as much on me as it is on her, because she did it, but she did it because of what I did to her first."

"That sounds painfully familiar," Roger said ruefully. "I was trying to steal Spaulding Enterprises from the Spauldings. Because of that, I had already nearly blown it with Holly more than once in the past few months, but she kept giving me second chances, kept forgiving me, because she wanted us to work. I did too...but I got greedy." He raked a hand through his hair. "I had asked her to marry me, Michael," he admitted painfully. "She wanted to say yes. She told me that she wanted to say yes, but she couldn't yet. The proposal was on the table. I was going out to get a ring to go with it, but I made a detour first...to the Spaulding Mansion."

Michael already knew how this particular story ended-with Holly married to another man that she was now divorcing, and Roger married to the woman who was now sleeping with his son and gaslighting him-but he knew they weren't at that point of the story yet, so he said, "Sounds like you made your own big mistake."

"I did," Roger said sadly. "There's no excuse for it, and the poorest of reasons: my own stupidity and greed. We were so close, Michael. Holly wanted to marry me. She wanted to say yes. She had already hinted that she would say yes if I formally asked again that night with a ring. She was waiting for me to come home so we could have a romantic dinner, just the two of us." He looked angry now, and Michael knew Roger was angry at himself. "But I just _**had**_ to go over to the Spaulding Mansion. I was trying to suck up to Alexandra Spaulding. She drugged my drink and got me into her bed." Now he looked ashamed. "Holly knew enough to go looking for me there when I didn't come home. She saw me in Alex's bed, and Alex was out to destroy me, destroy what mattered most to me, so she lied to Holly that I'd slept with her. She was devastated, Michael. She was so hurt, and so angry, and so betrayed. She fell right into Fletcher's arms that same night. That's what I drove her to."

"So what happened when you woke up?" Michael asked quietly, feeling badly for his old friend, knowing well the anger and self-loathing and pain that came from having so deeply hurt the only woman you ever loved and driven her into the arms of another man by your own stupid actions.

"I went straight to Holly, of course, but she wouldn't see me," Roger said. "She didn't believe me when I said I hadn't slept with Alex, that she had drugged me and planted me in her bed and lied to Holly that I'd slept with her. I pleaded with her to give me another chance, to let me prove that Alex was lying. I was able to prove that, and she forgave me, but she was still distant from me. She still wouldn't answer my proposal. She got more distant and more secretive. She didn't want me to know what had happened, but I figured it out. And you know what, Michael? I didn't care. I knew it was my fault she did it. I could forgive her for that one slip. But she didn't tell me." Now Roger looked angry. "_**He**_ did. And he was so smug about it, too. Practically bragging, the bastard."

Michael remembered how he had wanted to tear Jake McKinnon limb from limb when he learned about Donna's night with him, and then that Jake had not only blackmailed Donna over their one night together, but that Jake had raped Marley when she had gone to him to return his engagement ring and break things off with him permanently. "If I'd been there, I would have held his arms for you while you knocked his teeth down his throat," he muttered.

"When she saw Fletcher had me cornered at that damn banquet at the country club, and the look on my face, she knew that I knew," Roger said. "I've been shot more than once, I've been stabbed, beaten, I fell off a cliff in Santo Domingo, but all of those things taken together didn't hurt as much as that moment did. It felt like my heart had been ripped from my chest and trampled by several herds of bulls until there was nothing left." He scrubbed at his jaw with one hand. "I was reeling. I'd had it confirmed, and I needed time to process it. It's not like I took months. But by the time I did, she was dating him. The next thing I know, he's making this big public spectacle, declaring his love for her from a balcony in front of half the town, and she went running into his arms. Then she married him."

"And you and what's her name?" Michael asked.

"Dinah," Roger replied. "She's younger than my daughter. It's...It was a reaction on my part. She needed her trust fund, she wanted to stick it to her parents, who have never been fans of mine, I thought we were friends, so I married her. Then I started siphoning off her trust fund, and I'm guessing she found out and decided to start an affair with my estranged son. Who better to stick it to me with than Hart? And Hart never misses an opportunity to get back at me, so he probably figures stealing my wife is the way to go...except Dinah's not the one I really want. She never was. It's Holly. It's always been Holly, and it will always be Holly...if I can trust her not to leave me again for some other man that's better than me, at least on paper, because this last time...it damn near killed me, Michael. There were moments where I wished it would. But she says there's no one better for her than me, that I'm the only one she loves and the only one she wants to be with."

"She really wants you back," Michael said. "She loves you. Donna and I could see that clearly, and I just met Holly, and Donna just met both of you." Roger had set his now-empty coffee mug on the corner of Michael's desk and was toying with it. "Okay, Fox Head, it's gut check time." Roger looked up and met Michael's gaze. "Trusting Holly is a separate issue, and that one I'm afraid you're going to have to work out between the two of you, my friend. But you have to ask yourself two very important questions on the same subject: number one, you said you can forgive Holly for sleeping with this other guy the night she thought you slept with Alexandra Spaulding, but can you forgive her for marrying this other guy? Don't answer, just think about it."

"What's the second question?" Roger asked.

"Can you forgive yourself for being so monumentally stupid that you drove Holly into this other guy's arms and then everything spiraled out of control and went to hell after that?" Michael asked. "Again, don't answer me, just think about it. And I can tell you from experience, forgiving yourself is a lot harder than forgiving her."

"You forgave yourself?"

"Eventually," Michael said. "Took me a long time to do it, though."

"And you forgave Donna, and you were able to trust her again?" Roger asked.

"Eventually," Michael said again. "I took up with someone I knew she hated after we got divorced, but it didn't last. I knew it wouldn't going in. Then I moved to Hawaii for a few years. We had failed at marriage three times by then, and it really hurt. But I couldn't forget Donna any more than I could when I was in the Marines, or the Agency, or building my business empire. When I came back to Bay City, Donna was engaged to someone else. But we still had our daughters, and by that time two grandsons. We couldn't stay away from each other. The more time we spent together, the more we fell back into being us, even before we were officially us again. I made some more mistakes...more than Donna, at any rate...but I was able to forgive her, and I was able to forgive myself, and finally, one night last November, we were having dinner, and she said, 'This is ridiculous. You love me, Michael Hudson, and I love you. We have loved each other since we were 16 years old, and we will love each other until we die. And we've forgiven each other, and we have two amazing daughters and two wonderful grandsons and another on the way, and it's past time we address the elephant in the room. I don't need another wedding ring. I just need you.'"

"What did you say?" Roger asked, admiring Donna's forthrightness and moxie.

"I told her that I needed her too, that I've loved her from the moment I saw her and always will, and yes, we have forgiven each other, and that all I wanted was to go home with her that night and stay forever," Michael replied. "We've been together ever since. It's not always easy, but we're not gonna screw it up this time. We've been there and done that and burned the t-shirts. I am Donna's, and she is mine, and that's all."

"I hope I can say that about Holly and me someday," Roger said. He glanced at his watch then and said, "I should get going." He stood up, so Michael did too. "Thanks, Michael. For everything. Really."

They shook hands. "Anytime," he said. "I mean that."

"You're one of the very, very few people in my life that I know does," Roger replied honestly. "And that Yahoo deal looks good. I'd like to get in on that."

A grin creased Michael's face. "Great!" he exclaimed. "I was hoping you'd say that, and not just because I know you could use the distraction. We always made a great team, and this Internet thing is going to be huge. We get in on this at the right time, and we'll both be able to send all our grandchildren, including the ones that haven't even been born yet, to Ivy League schools to get their bachelor's, masters, and doctorates all three if they want them. Plus there's the thrill of the deal, the adventure, the excitement."

"It sounds great," Roger replied honestly. "It's been a long time since I've been involved in a business deal with someone that I knew wasn't going to screw me over."

"We'll have to meet again soon to go over more of the details before our first meeting with these guys," Michael said, tapping the folder of papers pertaining to the deal on his desk.

"Will they mind that you want to bring me in on this?" Roger asked. "Because if it's going to cause you problems-"

"They won't mind," Michael assured him. "I'll call you tomorrow afternoon after my conference call with them. Around 4:00?"

"Okay," Roger agreed. "Thanks again. Good night."

"Good night," Michael replied, clapping Roger on the back before Roger took his leave, silently mulling over the matters of forgiving Holly, and forgiving himself.


	6. The Winthrops' Advice and Holly's Intent

When the phone rang in his room at the country club, Roger had been expecting it to be Michael. He had been hoping it was Holly. He was somewhat surprised to learn upon answering that the person on the other end of the line was Frankie Frame. He had just had a difficult couple of days with Dinah and Hart, but he had played his part well; at least they hadn't seemed to suspect that he was only playing a part. In the time he was alone, he tried to focus on the good things in his life: Chrissy and her boys, Michael Hudson returning to his life, and Holly divorcing Fletcher and wanting him back.

Frankie had made some progress on the case, she said. "Probably not the kind of progress you were hoping for," she added. "But I'm working on proving the gaslighting angle. When and where would you like to meet to discuss what I do have in the way of proof?"

"Your office in two hours?" Roger suggested.

"That's fine," Frankie replied. "I'll see you then."

As soon as he hung up from Frankie, Roger called Holly. She answered on the first ring. "Hello?"

"I just had a call from Frankie Frame. I'm meeting with her in two hours at her office. Do you want to come along?" Roger asked.

"Yes," Holly replied instantly. "She has something already?" Holly had been impressed with Frankie over the phone and at their initial meeting, and she was even more impressed now.

"On the affair, apparently, not on...the other matter," Roger replied, belatedly wondering if Dinah and Hart could have tapped his phone here, since they knew he was staying here when he wasn't at the penthouse. What was the old saying about being paranoid, and just because you are paranoid that doesn't mean they're not out to get you? He already knew full well they were out to get him.

"Frankie did say that would probably take longer," Holly reminded him.

"Yeah," Roger agreed. "Anyway, I'll pick you up in an hour."

"I'll be waiting," Holly said.

Roger got the distinct feeling that she didn't only mean she'd be waiting for him to pick her up in an hour. She wanted him, wanted them, back. She loved him. He loved her too. Love wasn't the problem; he'd told her that already.

And forgiveness was not an insurmountable problem for Roger. Michael had been right: forgiving himself was harder than forgiving Holly. His dishonesty drove her to Fletcher that horrible, fateful night. He'd been thinking the past few days, ever since his talk with Michael, about forgiveness, about forgiving Holly, about forgiving himself. Holly referred to her marriage to Fletcher as a mistake. She was remedying the situation now. Roger was almost as conversant in the state divorce laws as Holly was, having been through...he stopped and counted in his head...four divorces-Peggy, Holly, Alexandra, and Jenna-with number five-Dinah-looming large. How many times had Holly been divorced? Roger thought and counted her divorces in his head now: Ed Bauer, himself, what's-his-name Lindsey in Switzerland, and now Fletcher.

Not that keeping score mattered. They had both made several mistakes in the marriage department. And it wasn't like Holly was talking about marriage. Did she even _**want**_ to marry him now? Did Roger want to marry Holly?

His heart said yes, of course he wanted to marry Holly.

But his head couldn't abide a possible sixth divorce being from her.

He popped a couple of ibuprofen tablets as he reflected that if this kind of confusion and uncertainty were what Holly had gone through for years, since they had both turned up back in Springfield, no wonder she had almost constantly put him off and insisted that they couldn't be together. It was emotionally draining to be so conflicted and in such turmoil, and it was far easier to listen to your head.

But the heart wants what it wants, and Roger wanted to be with Holly, and yes, he wanted to marry Holly. But after four divorces herself, maybe she wasn't thinking in that direction. She hadn't actually said she was. And being together but not married had been working for them when they had gotten back together the last time. It was working out just great for Michael and Donna, who had three divorces from each other under their belts and were not eager to risk divorce number four either.

The main issue at the moment was still, as always, trust. He had to be able to trust that she would not emotionally obliterate him again if they did get back together. And she was in the process of divorcing Fletcher, and he still had to divorce Dinah. He would not make Holly the other woman, not again. She deserved better than that. And the last thing he wanted to do was push for marriage and make Holly change her mind completely about wanting to be with him. Five minutes out of another marriage, even one that was a mistake of the magnitude as his marriage to Dinah and her marriage to Fletcher, was not the time to be asking for a lifetime commitment from another person, even if that person was the only person you ever saw yourself growing old with, and even if you shared an amazing daughter and two bouncing baby grandsons.

While Roger was thinking about this, Holly got ready to go with him back to Bay City, and she was having her own thoughts. She knew that the fact that she was the one coming to Roger and asking for another chance had thrown him for a loop, because always in their past, it had been him coming to her and wanting another chance. Not for the first time, she reflected that she had a whole new understanding of what Roger had gone through all those times in their past when he wanted her to be with him and she shut him down and shut him out. And she understood his reticence perfectly; she had been in his place so many times before, her heart and head at war with each other about what she wanted regarding Roger and what she should do regarding Roger, and she had been the one holding back, the one afraid to trust him, afraid to believe that they had what it took to go the distance this time, to make their relationship last forever this time. She had guarded herself against the kind of pain and heartbreak Roger was guarding himself against now, because just as only Roger could inflict that particular pain and heartbreak on her, only she could inflict that particular pain and heartbreak on Roger, because they only loved each other that way, the kind of love that could give you the most vast, absolute joy and the most utter, pervasive heartbreak it was humanly possible to feel. The love and the bond they shared had survived the unsurvivable; it was impossible for anything or anyone to sever that bond, to end that love. And Holly was finally ready to open herself up to all of the possibilities of that love and that bond, to put herself completely on the line this time and to do whatever it would take to make things work this time and last the rest of their lives this time.

The great irony was that now, when Holly was finally ready to be with Roger completely, holding nothing back, letting nothing and no one get in between them or drive them apart ever again...Roger_** wasn't** _ready for that. And he wasn't ready for that because Holly had hurt him deeply, badly. She was still figuring out exactly how to fix this, how to make Roger see how serious she was, how to make him see that at last, all she wanted was to be with him, to have a life together that lasted until death did they part, because she wanted a life and a future with Roger like she had never wanted anything in her entire life. She wanted to marry him, but she wasn't going to risk scaring him off completely by bringing marriage up just yet. Nevertheless, her resolve was clearer than it had ever been in her life, too, and no matter how much time it took, she would wait for him to be ready, and whatever she had to do to prove to Roger that he could trust her and believe her and that she would never leave him again, she would do. Then when the time was right, she would ask him to marry her, and this time she would mean it and she would follow through. And this time, their marriage would last forever.

A short time later, Roger picked Holly up at her house, and on the drive to Bay City, he asked her how her dinner with Blake a few nights ago had gone, and how she, Kevin and Jason were doing. "Kevin was really fussy when I was there, and he only wanted Blake," Holly replied. "I got Jason settled down and sleeping, but Blake and I were basically eating on the fly. She couldn't put Kevin down, because whenever she tried he'd scream his head off, so we didn't get much of a chance to talk. Then Ross got home and Jason woke up, and Blake went to tend to Jason while Ross took charge of Kevin." She paused, wondering if she should mention her chat with Ross to Roger.

"Did Ross say anything?" Roger asked.

"About?" Holly inquired, tucking her hair behind one ear.

"Then he _**did**_ say something," Roger concluded.

"He wanted to make sure I wasn't angry with him for representing Fletcher in the divorce instead of me," Holly began. "I told him I'm not. Then he remarked that the last time he saw me as light as I've been since deciding to get divorced was the last time I was with you."

"He doesn't-" Roger began anxiously. The last thing he needed was Ross alerting Dinah about the current situation between him and Holly, and where it had the potential to go, where deep down he and Holly both wanted it to end up.

"I told him that you and I aren't back together. But he knows how we feel about each other. At least, he knows that we have feelings for each other. He isn't looking at the issues that we're going to have to work through," Holly continued.

"He's probably hoping to catch me cheating on Dinah with you, because that would be convenient for her," Roger said acerbically. "I want a divorce, but I'm _**not** _putting you in the middle of it as the other woman. You deserve so much better than that. You would think Ross would know that."

"He's just concerned about his daughter," Holly replied, but at the same time she was encouraged by Roger's refusal to make her the other woman because she deserved better than that.

"Yes, well, he doesn't know the whole story yet," Roger said grimly, "though I doubt his feelings will change when he learns the whole story. I'll be the bad guy in his eyes. Not that I care. I just want to protect Chrissy from as much fallout as possible. This isn't going to be easy for her."

"It's not easy for _**you**_," Holly said. When Roger glanced at her, surprised, she continued. "Dinah and Hart are gaslighting you. You have to pretend it's working, and it has to bother you that Hart is doing this to you, because no matter how strained things are between you, he's still your son."

Roger smiled ruefully. "I always did say you're the only one who knows what it's really like between me and my kids," he remarked.

"Well, what I'm saying now is that you don't have to keep the way you're feeling about all of this to yourself," Holly told him earnestly. "I'm here. You can talk to me about it, if you want to." She bit her lip. "I don't want to push, but I also don't want you to feel like you don't have anyone to talk to about all of this if you want or need to talk. I want to be there for you, Roger. If you let me, I will be there for you."

They had arrived at the law office now, where Frankie was waiting. Roger turned off the car and turned to face Holly. "I appreciate that," he told her. "I have so much on my mind lately. Some of it I have to figure out for myself, but some of it...If I'm going to talk about it with anyone, it has to be you, Holly, and not just because you know everything that's going on." They just looked at each other intently for a long moment as Holly tried to come up with the exact right thing to say, but before she could formulate the perfect reply, Roger unbuckled his seat belt and said, "We should get in there. We don't want to keep Frankie waiting."

"Right," Holly said with a nod, fighting back a feeling of disappointment.

Frankie did indeed have photographic proof of Dinah's infidelity with Hart. Roger's expression remained impassive as he looked at the black-and-white photographs of Dinah and Hart passionately kissing in the living room of the Jessup farm. The kisses, the body language, the way Dinah and Hart were wrapped around each other, left no doubt that they were lovers.

"Getting proof of the gaslighting is going to take more time," Frankie said as Roger pushed the photographs back across the desk toward her. "But I'll get it, don't worry."

Cass came in then. "Holly, I left a message on your answering machine earlier," he said by way of greeting. "I heard from Ross Marler. Fletcher has responded to the divorce papers, so the next step is the four of us setting up a meeting to go over everything before taking it to the judge."

"Good," Holly replied. _Let's get this over with and settled so I can focus on the most important thing...or rather, the most important person,_ she thought as she met Roger's gaze, wondering what he was thinking and feeling about this. The divorce was a necessity, the necessary first step before she could really make another go of it with him, but he hadn't said much about her divorcing Fletcher, or her admission that marrying him in the first place was a mistake. They needed to talk about that, as difficult, even painful, as it might turn out to be. They needed to clear the air in order to keep moving forward, and Holly wanted to keep moving forward with Roger.

"If you have a few minutes, we can discuss that now," Cass said.

Now Holly looked at Roger questioningly. "Go ahead," he said.

After Holly and Cass were in Cass's private office, Frankie turned from the filing cabinet where she had just put the locked file containing the incriminating pictures of Dinah and Hart. "You remind me a lot of myself a few years ago," she said.

Roger was surprised to hear Frankie say that. "In what way?" he asked.

"In the way you look at Holly," Frankie replied, resuming her seat at her desk, "and in your body language when she's near you. You're fighting an instinct because you're trying not to get hurt any more or any worse than you already have been. Your instinct is telling you that she's right there, she's close enough to you that you can put your hand at the small of her back or at her elbow while you're walking, or to take her hand to help her out of the car, or to brush her hair off her face. That's the same part of you that wants to let her thread her fingers through yours and brush her hand across your cheek or play with the hair at the nape of your neck, squeeze your shoulder in affection. All those little touches and gestures that used to come as naturally to both of you as breathing. But your trust in her has been broken. She hurt you in a way you never knew or even thought she could. It hasn't stopped you from loving her, but you don't trust her right now. As much as you might want to, you have to be sure like you've never been sure of anything in your life that if you trust her again, she won't leave you again, because you're still not entirely sure how you survived it the first time."

Roger looked at Frankie in shock. "What are you, psychic?" he asked.

"Little bit," Frankie said with a nod. "But that's not how I know that everything I just said about you and Holly is completely true."

"Then how _**do** _you know?" Roger asked. "You're right, but how do you know?"

"Because I was once in exactly the same place you are now," Frankie replied. Seeing Roger cast a dubious look at the photograph on her desk of her, Cass, and their daughter Charlie all wearing matching Santa Claus hats from last Christmas, she said, "That's our life now. Five years ago, on the other hand..." She trailed off.

Roger had to ask. "What happened five years ago?"

"Cass was married once before," Frankie began. "Her name was Kathleen. She was an investigative journalist. She didn't tell him that she was tracking a big story, a known criminal, on their extended honeymoon. The criminal caught up to them and threatened her. So she sent Cass on ahead to the next place they were supposed to go, and then her plane crashed in Alaska. Supposedly she died."

"She didn't die," Roger said with great certainty. He knew how that went.

"No, she didn't," Frankie agreed. Roger saw a flash of remembered pain in her eyes for a few brief seconds before her expressive blue eyes returned to normal.

"How long was she gone, letting Cass and everyone think she was dead?" Roger asked.

"Four years," Frankie replied. "I met Cass two years after she supposedly died. I'd never met anybody like him before. He saw me for who I really was and liked me for being that person. My quirks and eccentricities didn't strike him as weird. He didn't think I was out there, which is more than I can say for my own mother. I'm a lot closer to my aunt Sharlene than I am to my mother. But Sharlene is more accepting than my mama. I love my mama, but we just don't really connect on any level. She once told me that she would go to her grave wishing I was more like her.

"And then here was Cass, who had been battered by things and people in his own past, telling me to look into his eyes and believe, and that I was fine just the way I am, and challenging me and annoying me and always being there for me even when I told him I didn't want him to be, which of course was a lie, and making me fall absolutely, completely, irretrievably in love with him because he was so loving and sweet and kind and good. No one ever loved me as unconditionally and as completely as Cass, and I was never in love with any man until Cass. He was the other half of me that I thought I'd never find, but somehow I did. We built a life together. We got married. We made a home together.

"And then Kathleen came back. She wanted Cass back. He was drawn to her, because this criminal that sabotaged her plane and made it crash, sending her into the Witness Protection Program, came back too, and he still wanted her dead. The second he knew she was alive, everything changed. And these were not changes I asked for or wanted. They just happened, and I was left to deal with them."

"He left you to go back to his first wife," Roger realized.

"Not right away," Frankie said. "But yes, eventually." She swallowed hard. "I didn't know I was capable of feeling pain of that magnitude. It just swallowed me whole. I was so empty inside, so numb, so broken."

"Like your beating heart was ripped from your chest, stomped into the dirt, and shattered into a million pieces," Roger murmured.

"Exactly," Frankie agreed. "At first, Kathleen made noises about not wanting him back, and Cass said he didn't want her, he wanted me. She granted him a divorce with no trouble, but then she fainted at the wedding when we tried to make it legal, which stopped the wedding cold while everyone including Cass tended to her."

Roger felt awful for Frankie, because he knew firsthand the kind of pain of which she spoke.

"It wasn't too long after that that Cass and I...parted ways," Frankie said quietly. "I loved him enough that I wanted him to be happy, and if Kathleen was what made him happy..."

"I'm not that selfless," Roger confessed. "I didn't do a very good job of making Holly happy when we were together, but thinking that someone else could do what I failed to do..."

"Nobody is a big enough person to want the love of their life to be happy with someone else," Frankie said. "But about two months after Cass left me for Kathleen, he came to me and told me that leaving me for her was a mistake, that he wanted me and us back. And he expected me to be all happy about this and fall into his arms, which I didn't."

"You couldn't," Roger said. "He hurt you. He broke your trust. How could you be sure that he wasn't going to up and change his mind in a few days or weeks or months and go back to her again?"

Frankie nodded. "But he wasn't going to leave me for Kathleen or anything or anyone else. Not ever again. He knew that, but I didn't. Like you said, he broke my trust, and I had to learn to trust him again."

"How did you do it?" Roger asked, trying to keep even the slightest note of desperate pleading out of his voice.

"It took time," Frankie replied. "I never stopped loving him, and because I loved him, I forgave him. That's what you do when you love someone: you find a way to forgive them." Now she grinned. "And of course Cass..." He recognized the look of fond affection in Frankie's eyes now as she trailed off, obviously remembering something. "I thought he pulled out all the stops the first time we were finding our way together, but it turns out I hadn't seen anything yet." Frankie came out of her reverie of memories, though she had already resumed talking, and looked Roger right in the eyes. "Of course, being Cass, he was a little bit pushy sometimes, but he got very good at backing off when I asked or told him to."

"Holly and I aren't that far yet," Roger said.

"Give it time," Frankie counseled. "Be patient. Be patient with yourself, and be patient with Holly. Really talk to her. It won't always be pleasant or pretty, but you have to get everything out there, all of the hurts and grievances, both of you. You can't keep it inside. It's rolling up your sleeves and digging in and giving each other everything you are, and everything you'll be. It's dealing with the past and letting it go so that you're not a slave to it anymore, so you can go on from here and have a future and a life together." Frankie smiled again. "And if you need to get away from everyone and everything and really meditate on your dilemma, I know a great retreat on a mountaintop in Peru that serves that purpose excellently."

Unbeknownst to Frankie and Roger, while they were having their talk in the outer office area at Frankie's desk, in Cass's office Cass and Holly, after setting up their meeting with Ross and Fletcher about Holly and Fletcher's divorce for later in the week, were having a talk of their own. Seeing the look of anticipation mingled with relief in Holly's eyes, Cass couldn't help commenting. "I remember that look," Cass said, removing his reading glasses and closing Holly's file on his desk.

"What look?" Holly asked.

"That 'Finally I'm getting out of this huge mistake I made so I can devote all of my time and energy to getting back with the person I never should have left in the first place' look," Cass replied.

"Oh," Holly said. "I guess being a lawyer, you've probably seen this look several times when you're representing people in divorce cases."

"A few times," Cass agreed with a quick nod. "But the look in your eyes is a very specific, very familiar one. It would be impossible for me to ever forget where I saw that look before."

Holly had to ask. "Where _**did**_ you see it before?"

"In the mirror, five years ago," Cass replied.

Holly was shocked. "You mean you..." She wasn't sure how to phrase it.

"Was once misguided enough to leave Frankie for someone else, yes," Cass said. He grimaced at the memory. "I was married once before Frankie. Kathleen. I thought she had died in a plane crash in Alaska. At least, that's what I was told." The corner of his mouth twisted now. "I wasn't looking to fall in love when I met Frankie. In fact, at first, all we did was annoy each other, because we were on opposite sides of a murder trial. Then Frankie found the real killer, saving my best friend, who had been sent to prison for the murder, in the process. That was when I realized she was really good at her job. And after the start we got off to, it took real courage on Frankie's part to ask me for a job after that, but she did, and I gave her a chance. We worked well together...we still do...but after that rocky start, we got to be friends. And then I found myself asking her for an actual date. It had been a long time since I'd been on one of those, but Frankie..." He smiled now, the kind of smile that started in his eyes and took hold of his entire being. "She was a breath of fresh spring air after a long, cold winter. She was like no other woman I'd ever known, and I wanted to get to know her better. She said yes, but I let myself get sidetracked by a...let's call her a friend."

"A friend?" Holly asked, one eyebrow raised.

"Okay, a little more than a friend, but certainly not someone I was in a relationship with or in love with," Cass said. "I was late picking Frankie up, so she thought I stood her up, and she tracked me down. She was ready to tear Caroline's head off, and Caroline didn't like Frankie either, probably because Caroline wanted to be dating me but she knew I wasn't interested in a relationship with her, so I had to get in between them to stop them from getting into a fight, and Frankie threw a glass of champagne right in my face. Then she told me that if I wanted to stand in front of her car, it would be her pleasure to run me over."

"You had that coming," Holly told Cass.

"I did. I definitely did," Cass agreed. His smile grew softer. "Then I kissed her. That was our first real kiss." He fell silent, lost in the memory for a moment, before snapping back to the present and meeting Holly's intent gaze. "Frankie and I were falling in love, but we each had our own past baggage and past fears. Frankie was especially skittish. It took some time for me to find out why, but all along, I knew she was worth it. Worth any amount of time, worth cultivating a patience I didn't know I had until she came into my life, worth not pushing too hard because I didn't want to scare her any more than she already was. I made some mistakes, and Frankie tried to run from her feelings a few times, but we got through it all together. I knew that she was my future, she was my life, and the night we got married was the greatest night of my life up to that point."

"Only Kathleen wasn't dead," Holly said.

"No, she wasn't," Cass said. "She came back four years after I was told she had died. I was in shock. I was confused. For a while there, I didn't know which end was up. And she was being targeted by a very dangerous criminal, the reason she had faked her death and gone into Witness Protection in the first place."

"You were married to her at the time, though, right?" Holly asked. At Cass's affirmative answer, Holly said, "Then why didn't she take you with her? You would have gone if she'd asked you to, if you'd known what was really going on, but she kept all of that from you?"

"I would have gone with her, yes," Cass agreed. "And yes, she kept it all from me. I didn't ask myself any of those questions until later on...after I had left Frankie and tried to make another go of it with Kathleen." Now he looked pained. "I've done some stupid things in my life, but hands down, that was the stupidest. Giving up my life and future with Frankie to try and recapture the past with Kathleen was the biggest mistake I ever made...and it didn't take me long to realize that, either."

"What did you do when you realized it?" Holly asked.

"I went straight to Frankie and told her that I was leaving Kathleen, that what Kathleen and I had was in the past and was going to stay there, and I wanted her and our life together back," Cass replied. "But I had devastated her when I left her for Kathleen. It wasn't easy for me to do it, but Frankie...I emotionally destroyed her. She had loved me and trusted me, and so many other people in her life before me had hurt her, and I was the one person who was never supposed to hurt her, and I hurt her worse than all the rest of them combined. I completely wiped out the trust she fought so hard to build and I fought so hard to earn in the first place."

Holly knew where Cass was coming from on that score. That was exactly what she had done to Roger. "Until you did it, you didn't believe you were capable of hurting her that much, that deeply and that badly," she murmured, shifting in her chair and looking at the floor for a moment.

"Right," Cass agreed quietly. Not that he had doubted Frankie's intuition about them before, but now he knew for sure that Holly and Roger were in a place very similar to where he and Frankie had been when Kathleen came back, and for several months even after Cass had remedied the biggest mistake of his life and cut ties with Kathleen once and for all and realized with a clarity he'd never felt about anything else that his life and future were with Frankie. "Kathleen wasn't exactly gracious about accepting that I didn't want to be with her anymore," he continued.

"Thank God I don't have that problem," Holly murmured. Fletcher agreed with her that getting married had been a mistake and was not giving her any problems at all with the divorce.

"Then Frankie figured out that the man who had been trying to kill Kathleen before and still wanted her dead had planted a bomb," Cass said. "She saved Kathleen's life...and nearly died herself in the process."

Holly's face revealed her awe at this revelation. "I couldn't do that for any of Roger's exes," she reflected. "But if it was Roger, I'd give my life to save him without even having to think about it."

"Frankie was clinically dead at the hospital, but I refused to believe that was where it ended for us. I wouldn't leave her side. I kept talking to her, pleading with her to wake up, telling her over and over again how much I loved her and needed her and that I wasn't leaving that room without her, and she came back. Loving me wasn't the problem, though. She still loved me, she just didn't-"

"Trust you," Holly said at the same time Cass said, "trust me."

"You had to earn back Frankie's trust," Holly said, looking at Cass again now, feeling a kinship with this man that went beyond the fact that he was her divorce lawyer.

"Yes, I did," Cass replied.

"How did you do it?" Holly asked, hoping she didn't sound too desperate.

"It wasn't easy," Cass said. "I did everything I could think of. I begged for her forgiveness. I told her every day and in every way I could think of that I loved her and I wanted her back. I kept asking her to marry me again. That last one didn't go over so well," he added ruefully. "She kept telling me no, and then she kept telling me that she wasn't ready yet.

"But it wasn't just telling her. It was showing her. Actions speak louder than words." Holly nodded. "I stayed as close to her as she would let me get. I let her know that I was there for her and that nothing and no one would ever get me to leave her side again. Whatever she had going on, whatever she was doing, whatever she was going through, and it was a lot and not just because of me and our relationship, I was right there through all of it. And gradually, we rebuilt the closeness we had once shared, and Frankie came to know that she could trust me to never leave her and to never hurt her like that again. She loved me, she forgave me, and she learned to trust me again. And we finally found our way back to each other...after one last misunderstanding." At Holly's quizzical look, Cass said, "I thought that she was going to tell me she couldn't do it, that what we had was over. I couldn't bear the thought of being here without her, so I was ready to leave town. I was on the plane, and I couldn't shake the feeling that I was forgetting something, so I got off the plane...and when I walked back through the gate at the airport, Frankie was there. I walked straight into her arms, and I've stayed there ever since."

"I'm the one earning back Roger's trust," Holly said. "I'm still figuring out exactly how to do it, to be honest."

"There isn't one set way to earn back the trust of the person you love above all others," Cass replied. He leaned forward in his chair "If you want my advice-"

"Please," Holly said earnestly.

"Be patient," Cass said. "Give him time. Give him space when he needs it. Tell him and show him every way you can think of how serious and how sincere you are about wanting a life and a future with him."

"I can definitely do that," Holly said, feeling hopeful.

"And it's probably a good idea not to repeatedly ask him to marry you, if you're thinking that far ahead already," Cass added.

"I am," Holly admitted, "but no, I'm not going to propose to Roger until I know the time is right, until I'm sure that we're _**both**_ ready for that and that he'll say yes."

"And until your divorce is final and his divorce is final," Cass concluded.

"That's a must," Holly agreed. She stood up, so Cass stood up too. "Thank you, Cass, for everything."

Cass took the hand Holly extended and shook it. "You're welcome, Holly," he said, "and good luck."

Cass and Holly emerged from Cass's office to find Roger showing Frankie the pictures of Blake, Kevin, and Jason he carried in his wallet. "That's Kevin, and that's Jason," he said, pointing to first one baby and then the other in the snapshot of Blake holding both boys.

"They're beautiful," Frankie said. "My best friend Ryan is married to a twin, but she's an identical twin."

"One of Michael Hudson's daughters?" Roger asked.

"Yeah, Vicky," Frankie replied. "And her sister is married to my cousin Jamie."

"Small world," Roger murmured.

"You know Michael?" Frankie asked.

"They go way back," Holly said.

Frankie and Roger looked up to see Cass and Holly standing there. "I was just showing Frankie pictures of Chrissy and the boys," Roger said as he accepted the snapshot back from Frankie and replaced it in his wallet.

"You have a beautiful family," Frankie said to Holly.

"So do you," Holly replied, gesturing to the Christmas picture on Frankie's desk. "How old is your little girl?"

"Charlie was two in February," Frankie said. "When were Kevin and Jason born?"

"Almost three months ago," Holly said.

The phone in Cass's office rang then. "I'd better get that," he said. "Holly, I'll see you next Tuesday afternoon, 2:30, the courthouse in Springfield."

"I'll be there," Holly assured him.

Holly looked at Roger then. "Ready to go?" she asked.

"Yes," Roger said. "Thank you, Frankie."

"Yes, thank you, Frankie," Holly echoed.

"It's what I do," Frankie replied. "I'll get you proof of the gaslighting as soon as I can. It's going to take something a little more intensive to get that, but I _**will** _get it."

"I know you will," Roger said.

"I'll call you with another update next week," Frankie pledged.

When they were in the car, Roger asked Holly, "Are you in any particular hurry to get back to Springfield?"

"No," Holly replied. "But I think we need to talk."

"We do," Roger agreed. "But not at The Harbor Club. We'd just run into Donna and/or Michael, and this is one conversation that needs to be just between us."

"Yes," Holly said. "So where do we go to talk?"

They were driving by a park, so Roger suggested, "Here?"

"All right," Holly agreed.

Roger parked the car and shut off the ignition. He and Holly were both quiet for a long moment. Then they both started speaking at the same time.

"Holly, I-"

"Roger, I-"

They both stopped short and laughed a bit self-consciously. "It would work better if we would take turns," Roger said.

"Yeah, it would," Holly agreed. "You go first."

"Are you sure?" Roger asked.

"Yes," Holly said.

"Okay," Roger said. He took a deep breath, then shifted in the driver's seat, turning so that he was facing Holly. "I'm sorry."

"For what?" Holly asked, confused.

"For not being honest with you about where I was going That Night," Roger said. She heard the capital letters and knew which night he meant. "I have no excuse for what I did. I should have been honest with you. By not being honest, I drove you to Fletcher."

"Yes, you were wrong," Holly agreed, "but so was I. And that's not the first time that I thought you were cheating on me and I turned to another man. It's not even the first time I married my rebound man. It's a pattern of mine, but it's a pattern I'm breaking."

"Because you want to be with me and only me," Roger said. He was stating it in an even tone of voice, as a fact, no sarcasm or rancor.

"I know you don't believe that yet, and I know that you don't trust me yet, but yes," Holly said. "We both made plenty of mistakes That Night and after. There's enough blame to go around, but we'll never get anywhere if we let ourselves get bogged down in the mistakes and who's at fault. I was responsible for my own actions. I made the same mistake with Fletcher that I made with Ed years ago, except that Ed and I found that we could be friends after the marriage was over. And I know now that marrying somebody else to try and forget about you or get over you never works, because I could never forget about you, and I will never get over you. What's more, I don't want to forget you or get over you."

"I could never forget you or get over you either," Roger said, "nor do I want to. Forgiveness, though... You can really forgive me for what I did That Night?"

"I've forgiven you for much worse things," Holly replied seriously, earnestly, her eyes locked with Roger's, her posture unconsciously now perfectly mirroring his own, since she had turned in her seat to fully face him. "Yes, I forgive you for That Night. But can _**you**_ forgive _**me**_?"

He saw the anxiety in her eyes. "I can," Roger said. "I do. I forgive you, Holly. That's what you do when you love someone. And I do love you."

She reached for his hand and squeezed it before linking her fingers with his. "I love you too, Roger," she said. "And we're gonna get it right this time. We're going to build a life together on a firm foundation of love and trust and fidelity and honesty."

"I want to believe that," Roger said, looking at their joined hands before meeting Holly's gaze again.

"You will," she vowed. "And until you do, I will believe for both of us."

"We really _**have**_ traded places," Roger reflected.

"Yes, we have," Holly agreed. "I have a whole new understanding of how you felt all those times you wanted another chance with me and I just..." She trailed off; he knew what she meant.

"And I know now how you felt, why you were so cautious and careful, how your head and your heart were so at odds with each other," he replied. "That part gets exhausting emotionally."

"I remember," Holly said. "But I'm going to do everything I can to make you believe in us again, and to show you that this time, nothing and no one will ever take me away from you again. From this moment on, I'm wooing you."

"You're wooing me?" Roger asked with a smile.

Holly smiled back. "Yes," she replied. "I'm going to court you like you've never been courted before."

They just looked at each other, smiling, for a moment before Holly grew serious. "I'm going to prove to you that you can trust me again. I can't promise that we'll never fight or hurt each other's feelings, because we both know that we will." The look in Roger's eyes told her that he knew that too and agreed with it. "But I can promise...I _**do**_ promise that if you trust me with your heart one more time, I will cherish it and keep it safe and never break it again for the rest of my life."

Roger wanted more than anything to trust Holly like that, and to believe that that was exactly what she would do.

"Just...if I get too pushy, tell me and I'll back off," she added. "I won't back off too far. But when you need space, tell me and I'll give it to you."

"I will," Roger said. Then he thought of something else. "Is there some kind of timetable for how long it'll take for you to convince me?"

"It will take as long as it takes," Holly replied. "There is no timetable. I'm not going to get bored or tired or fed up, no matter what. I am never giving up on you or us." She brushed a kiss across the back of his hand, then looked deeply into his eyes. "I'm all in, Roger."

Roger didn't realize he'd been holding his breath until he exhaled, looking deeply into her eyes. "I don't know how long it will take either, but for us to be together again, I need for you to convince me that everything you're saying is true," he entreated.

"I will," Holly promised firmly, honestly.


	7. Slowly Gaining Ground

It was now nearing the end of June-June 25, to be exact-and Holly awoke before the alarm went off that morning.

Today was the day she and Cass were meeting with Fletcher and Ross about the divorce, to settle everything before taking it before the judge. She was one step closer to being legally single again, and rectifying the huge mistake she had made in marrying Fletcher.

She and Roger were talking regularly and feeling their way as they slowly, carefully began to rekindle their relationship. Holly knew they had a long way to go, but going slowly didn't bother her at all. She was grateful for this chance to prove to Roger that they could work, that she was trustworthy.

She picked up the phone from her nightstand and punched in the number to Roger's new cellular phone. He had gotten it five days ago after admitting that it had occurred to him that Dinah and Hart might have had his phone at the country club bugged since they knew he was staying there when he wasn't at the penthouse with Dinah, in the guest room. Holly had gotten her own cellular phone the next day. She was still learning how to work it, but she did have Roger's cell phone number programmed into her cell phone, although her phone was charging at the moment, so she called him now from the house extension in her bedroom.

He answered sleepily on the third ring. "H'lo?"

"Good morning. Did I wake you?" she asked.

"Holly." Roger sounded instantly awake now. "No, not really. I was almost completely awake. Now I _**am**_ completely awake. Good morning to you too." When the phone rang, Roger had been approaching wakefulness after a very vivid dream about Holly, and now she was on his cell phone. He glanced ruefully at his lap; his body was still reacting to the memory of the dream, and now it was also reacting to the sound of her voice on the line.

"Today's the 25th."

"You have your meeting today with Cass and Ross and Fletcher," Roger remembered. "Your pre-divorce meeting." He raked a hand through his hair. "I have a meeting today too, with Michael and the Yahoo people."

"Mine's this afternoon," Holly said.

"Mine's this evening," Roger replied.

"Does that mean you'll have time for dinner or a cup of coffee or something before your meeting?" she asked hopefully.

"I can do that," Roger agreed, "as long as it's in Bay City."

"Absolutely," Holly said. "The Harbor Club?"

"Sure," Roger said. "But can we meet at the Bayshore Hotel? The meeting might run kind of long, so I figured I'd just stay over in Bay City tonight. I'm going to check in at the Bayshore this afternoon."

"I'll head to the Bayshore as soon as my meeting is over," Holly said. "Should I just ask for your room number at the front desk?"

"Since you have no way of knowing how long the meeting will take, that's probably the easiest way to find me," Roger said. He paused for a minute, then said, "Good luck today. At your meeting."

"Thank you," Holly replied. She wasn't worried, though. Fletcher was just as eager to end their marriage as she was, and Holly wouldn't have been surprised if Alexandra Spaulding had something to do with Fletcher's eagerness. She was just ready to resolve as much as possible regarding the dissolution of the marriage today, and hoping for a court date to finalize the decree sooner rather than later. "It will be a relief to get it over with. I'll be one step closer to the divorce being final after today." She pushed her hair off her forehead and asked, "How is it going with Dinah and Hart?"

"Dinah left the day before yesterday to visit some friends in Europe," Roger replied. "At least, that's what she told me, and, I presume, Ross and Vanessa. According to Frankie, Dinah and Hart are in Chicago, probably plotting the next step in their plan to drive me out of my mind while having a romantic trip. She's really going above and beyond on this job. She's actually in Chicago too, tailing them. You really picked a great investigator when you picked her."

"I'm glad she's working out so well," Holly said.

"I've, um, got a lot of stuff to go over with Michael before the meeting," Roger said, "so I should get going."

"Yeah, I have a few things to do myself before my meeting," Holly said. "I'll see you later at the Bayshore."

"We'll get dinner at The Harbor Club," Roger agreed. "Until this afternoon."

"Until this afternoon," Holly echoed. Roger hung up, so she did too. Opening the drawer of her nightstand, she removed the box containing the purchase she had picked up the day she and Roger had gone to Bay City to meet with Frankie and Cass for the first time and opened it, looking inside as the five words that had become her mantra for her longed-for, hoped-for, working-toward, eventual reunion with Roger ran through her mind. After a few minutes, she closed the box, carefully replaced it in the drawer, and then got out of bed to officially start her day.

Meanwhile, Roger shaved, took a cold shower, packed a few things in an overnight bag, ate a quick breakfast of toast and coffee, and drove to Bay City, where he checked in at The Bayshore Hotel, taking a suite on the seventeenth floor. After unpacking, he called Michael at his office. "Hey, Fox Head, you make it to town yet?" Michael greeted him.

"Yeah, I'm all checked in at The Bayshore," Roger replied. "You want me to head your way to go over the stuff we need to go over before the meeting with the Yahoo people tonight?"

"Actually, The Bayshore has the best filet mignon in town," Michael said, "and I haven't had one in months. How 'bout I head over to you, we order up a couple of steaks, and we go over everything in your suite before we have to head back to the office tonight for the meeting?"

"Fine by me," Roger replied. "I'm in suite 1714."

"I'll be there in ten minutes," Michael said.

While Michael and Roger had their steaks and then went over all of the necessary information for their meeting that night, Holly met Cass at the courthouse in Springfield. "Hi, Cass," Holly greeted him.

"Hello, Holly," Cass replied, shaking her outstretched hand. "I'm not sure if this is something you'd be interested in, but you mentioned when we spoke on the phone earlier this week that you're looking for a new business opportunity, something in media. I may have something for you."

"Really?" Holly asked, surprised. "You're already doing so much with the divorce, and executing that as swiftly as possible. I didn't expect you to go looking for possible new jobs for me, too, Cass."

"I didn't go looking. This one found me," Cass replied. "A friend and client of mine owns a television station in Bay City, KBAY. She's in the middle of a divorce herself right now, and she's looking to sell the station. I'm not sure if that's the kind of media you have in mind, but I did tell her that I knew of someone who might be interested in meeting with her to discuss the station. It's not a commitment either way, to buy or not to buy, just a chance for the two of you to sit down and discuss the station, and for you to find out what kind of operation it is and see if it's something you'd be interested in pursuing."

"That would be terrific!" Holly exclaimed. "Before I went to the _Journal_, I was co-owner and station manager of WSPR here in Springfield. I worked as a producer, I was involved in syndication deals, advertising rates, the whole nine yards. And I really enjoyed my work back then. I would absolutely like to meet with your client about KBAY."

Cass smiled. "Great," he said. "She's waiting to hear from me. I think I have time to give her a call and let her know you're interested."

"Tell her I can meet with her anytime this week," Holly replied.

"All right," Cass agreed. "Excuse me." Cass stepped over to the pay phone just down the hall. Holly watched anxiously as he placed the call. When Cass smiled and flashed her a thumbs-up, she smiled back, no longer anxious. Ross and Fletcher arrived together, and Cass saw them, quickly wrapping up his call and returning to the middle of the hall, where Holly now stood with the others. "I'll tell you later," Cass said an undertone. Holly nodded once, then introduced Cass to Ross and Fletcher, and the four of them adjourned to a private conference room, where they went over the terms of Holly and Fletcher's divorce.

Both Ross and Fletcher were surprised when Holly offered to sell all of her shares of the _Journal_ to Fletcher, but to Holly, it just made sense; she was doing okay financially, she wasn't going to be working at the paper any longer, and while she was doing okay financially, she would need an infusion of capital to be able to buy KBAY if that's what she decided to do, and if she didn't buy KBAY, she would look for employment or to invest in another television or radio station or newspaper, but it would definitely not be in Springfield.

Ross and Fletcher left the room to discuss Holly's offer to sell her shares of the _Journal_ to Fletcher, and when they were alone, Holly asked Cass, "So, KBAY?"

"The seller is Rachel Cory," Cass began.

"As in Cory Publishing?" Holly asked.

"Yes," Cass replied. "Like I told you, she's in the middle of a divorce herself. It isn't that the station isn't producing revenue, because it is, but she's looking to simplify her life somewhat. She would like to meet with you tomorrow afternoon at 2 at her office at Cory Publishing, if you can make it."

"I can make it," Holly said. "I'll be there."

Ross and Fletcher returned then, and Fletcher agreed to buy Holly's shares of the _Journal_, which gave him controlling interest of the paper. After they had reached agreement on the shares, nothing else remained to be ironed out, since they had no joint property or assets to dispose of, and Holly did not want and was not asking for alimony.

All that remained was for the judge to issue the final decree, and according to Ross, that wouldn't be until mid-August at the earliest. Holly quickly counted in her head, and realized that was another six to seven weeks. It might take a little longer, than that, Ross said, but all things considered, six to seven weeks was not so long to wait for the divorce to be final.

When they had concluded the meeting, Holly stayed back to talk to Cass more about KBAY and Rachel Cory, but she noticed that Alexandra Spaulding was waiting in the hall when they exited the conference room, and Alex went straight to Fletcher's side. A smile bloomed on Alex's face after a moment, and Cass and Holly both noticed when Fletcher and Alex left the courthouse arm in arm. "Holly?" Cass asked after a moment, seeing her watching Fletcher and Alex together.

Holly snapped back to attention, looking at Cass with her full attention. "It's fine," she said. "It's what I thought. I wish Fletcher well. He has his life, and I have mine, and that's the way it should be. I know you must think it's odd, but Fletcher and I were never any great love match. We were each other's rebounds, and now you have a prime example to use in the future when you're handling other divorces: this is why you never marry your rebound relationship. You hold out for the one you love, no matter what it takes, no matter what you have to slog through and work out and deal with first." Cass certainly agreed with that philosophy. "So," Holly went on, "tomorrow afternoon, 2 PM, Cory Publishing, and I'm meeting with Rachel Cory."

"Yes," Cass replied, and as he walked Holly out to her car, they talked about Rachel and KBAY.

When they reached her car, Holly said, "Thank you, Cass. Really. I've been divorced before, but it's never gone this quickly or this smoothly."

"That's mostly because of you, and Fletcher," Cass replied. "I will say I don't think I've ever seen such a civilized divorce before."

"I just want to put this mistake behind me and get on with the rest of my life," Holly said. "A life that I hope will include Roger."

"Frankie and I are pulling for you two," Cass said. "How are things going with him? I know how difficult it can be when you know who you're supposed to be with, but they're...well, not on the same page as you are yet. It can make you do crazy things."

"I'm not exactly known for doing crazy things," Holly said with a laugh.

"That's probably helpful," Cass agreed, smiling. "I think the tamest thing I did when I was wooing Frankie again was that her aunt set her up on a blind date, and I happened to be at the restaurant where they went. Her aunt and her husband accompanied Frankie, and the blind date guy met them there. I kept sending Jamaican Me Crazys to Frankie, and I actually wrote a note on one of the little umbrellas, telling her that I would keep sending them until she talked to me. Then when we went out on the terrace to talk, I told her that her date wasn't right for her because he wasn't me-"

"A secure man, I don't think I've ever met one of those before," Holly mused, without any bite to her words.

"I can have an ego," Cass admitted. "But Frankie's the best at keeping it, keeping_** me**_, in line. She wasn't too happy to hear me say that, and I had to realize that I was driving her away, which was the last thing I wanted. I just wanted us back. I literally got down on my knees right out there on that terrace, which actually only made her angrier. I was messing up, badly. But finally I was able to spit out what I really wanted to say, which was that I wanted to earn my way back into her life, and I vowed that I would put as much energy into doing that as I had into messing us up."

"What did she say to that?" Holly asked.

"She said that sounded promising," Cass replied.

"So don't buy Roger obnoxious drinks, got it," Holly said with a nod. She smiled again. "He's not dating anybody else. He said it's either me or no one, so right now, it's no one."

"Now _**that**_ sounds _**very**_ promising," Cass remarked with a smile.

"It does, doesn't it," Holly replied, and her smile grew wider. "I know it's a slow process, but I want to earn my way back into Roger's life, like you earned your way back into Frankie's. I don't think I'll be doing anything crazy in the earning my way back, but I would definitely do something crazy if I thought it would get me any closer to him. But I can be patient."

"It's all worth it in the end," Cass promised, "and I know whereof I speak. And if you do decide to buy KBAY and you have any legal questions, you have my number."

"Thanks," Holly said. "Now, I'd better get going."

"Date with Roger?" Cass asked interestedly.

"We're having dinner. I don't think we're actually calling it dating, at least not yet," Holly replied.

"Have a good time. And don't get too crazy," Cass teased.

"He has a business meeting tonight. Craziness is not on the menu," Holly said before getting in her car to head to Bay City.

At the same time, in Roger's suite at The Bayshore, he and Michael had just finished going over the last of the projections they had on Yahoo. "If these projections are anywhere close to accurate, this thing is going to be huge," Roger said, rubbing at the back of his neck.

"Remember when computers were these massive boxes that took up an entire room?" Michael asked as he put the last of the paperwork back in his briefcase and closed it. He and Roger had both long ago shed their jackets and loosened their ties, and Michael even had his shoes off and was now propping his sock-clad feet up on the coffee table next to his briefcase. "Now you can actually put a whole computer on top of a table, or even on your lap."

"A computer in every home," Roger said. "I never thought I'd see the day."

"Hopefully some politician won't appropriate 'a computer in every home' for their campaign slogan," Michael replied. "And that was a good catch on those growth rate numbers. If I had gone in there with the wrong numbers, they probably would have walked right out."

"I've always had a head for numbers," Roger said, waving away the compliment. "Thank you, Michael, for bringing me in on this. It's not just a distraction, although it's proving to be a good distraction too. It's been a really long time since I've worked on any project that was this engaging. And I've never worked in business with someone that I knew wasn't out to use me, screw me over, or both, until now."

"We always were a good team," Michael said. "I'm glad to have you on board, Roger. You've got more business acumen than anyone I've worked with in ages. If the Yahoo people bite, then theoretically, you and I could have a lot to do with this project for a long time to come."

"I would like that," Roger replied. "I would like that a lot."

"Depending on how tonight's meeting goes, we'll have to see what we can do on that score," Michael said. Before Roger could ask Michael exactly what he meant by that, Michael said, "So, how is everything else going? Has Frankie gotten anything yet?"

"She has proof of the affair," Roger told him. "She's working on getting proof of the gaslighting."

"She'll get it," Michael said confidently. "And if you need the use of a psych ward to throw them off the scent, or anything else, all you have to do is ask. Now, the really important question: how are things going with Holly?"

"We're having dinner together tonight," Roger replied. He said, "How did you do it?"

"Do what?" Michael asked.

"Trust that Donna wouldn't destroy you again if you let her back into your life and got back together with her," Roger clarified.

Michael thought about it for a moment. "Donna and I couldn't stay away from each other," he began. "When I moved back here after living in Hawaii by myself for a few years, I knew she was still here, of course. I even knew that she was with Matthew Cory. Marley and Victoria both kept me apprised of that situation. They both had a hard time with the fact that Donna was with someone other than me, especially someone so much younger, and related to both of them through marriage. It wasn't that they had anything against Matt, he's a nice guy, but..."

"He's not you," Roger finished.

"It bothered me. That's part of the reason I came back," Michael confessed. "I got two frantic phone calls from my daughters within an hour of each other after Donna accepted Matthew Cory's marriage proposal. Vicky being Vicky, she was blunt enough to tell me to get my butt back here before I lost Donna forever. Marley was more diplomatic, as is characteristic of her, but she encouraged me to really examine my feelings and decide if I was ready to let Donna walk out of my life for good. I wasn't. I didn't come back here with the express purpose of stealing her from Matthew Cory, but the second I laid eyes on her again, it all came rushing back to me. All of the pleasure, all of the pain, all of the moments, good and bad, that made up our life. And can I tell you something, Roger? The second I laid eyes on Donna again, I actually felt my heart beating for the first time since I walked out on her for the last time. I mean, I know my heart kept beating all the years we were apart. I took biology in school, and my brother and my son-in-law Jamie are both doctors. But I've only truly felt alive when I'm with Donna, or at least around her. It's been that way since I was 16 and mucking out stalls in her father's stable, and it'll be that way until they plant me in the ground, hopefully many, many years from now."

Because it was Michael Hudson, the one true friend he had ever had in his life, the one person he had ever been able to consistently count on to have his back and not hurt him or screw him over in any way, Roger asked the question he would never, could never, ask of anyone else. "Weren't you ever scared that if you let her back in to your life, she'd annihilate you again?"

"I was terrified of that," Michael admitted honestly. "And because I was so terrified, I drove her to marry Matthew Cory."

"How?" Roger asked, surprised. This was news to him.

"The night before she was supposed to marry him, she came to see me. She had a pair of cufflinks that she had given me as a gift years ago, and I had left them with her the last time we broke up," Michael said. "But those cufflinks were just her excuse to get in the door. I'd been back several months by then, we'd been dancing around each other in all that time. It was no secret how our daughters felt. Everything was still there between us. We made love that night. And I'm not one to kiss and tell, but it was one of the greatest nights of my life. For that one moment, Donna was back in my arms and all was right with the world.

"But the world has a nasty habit of intruding on an idyll. Morning came, I woke up first, I looked at Donna sleeping on my chest, and I panicked. I wanted her back, but we hadn't really talked about anything in all that time, about us or why we kept screwing things up or what we wanted or expected of any future relationship. She woke up and just assumed we were back together and wasn't even going to show up to the church. Telling Donna that morning that we weren't back together yet, that I wasn't ready for that yet was one of the hardest things I've ever had to do in my life. She took it badly. She told me off and went rushing out of there to marry Matthew Cory because she thought I didn't want her at all. But I did. I just wanted us to get it right this time, but she didn't stick around long enough for me to explain that. She was running late, so she crashed her car. She wasn't seriously hurt, thank God, but they kept her in the hospital overnight for observation. She married Matthew in her hospital room, in front of his mother and brothers and our daughters...and me."

Roger winced. "That had to be hell for you," he said sympathetically.

"I was more angry than hurt," Michael replied. "I knew Donna well enough to know that that twinkle in her eye when she said 'I do' to him wasn't joy, it was defiance. I don't think Matthew noticed that she looked right at me after she said 'I do.' I was standing behind and to the right of the hospital chaplain, so it looked like she was looking at him, but her eyes met mine for a few seconds, and I knew. I also knew that the marriage wouldn't last. For one thing, I've known Matthew since he was in high school and dating my niece Josie. He's no dummy. He knew Donna and I had deep feelings for each other, and I guess from day one, Donna had one foot out the door of the marriage. It only took him a couple of months to figure out what happened between Donna and me the night before the wedding, and he's not the type of man to abide being cheated on, especially when he knew that Donna wasn't really invested in their marriage or their relationship, and hadn't been since the second we saw each other when I returned to town all those months before. He confronted her, she admitted what happened, he asked her if she still loved me, she said yes, he said, 'Then why the hell did you marry me, Donna?' She didn't have an answer for that. He ripped off his wedding ring, threw it at her feet, walked out, and got an annulment. And I know this because after he walked out, she called me...ostensibly to warn me that Matthew might be showing up at my door angry, drunk, or both, and she meant the warning."

"Did he show up at your door?" Roger asked.

"Oh yeah," Michael said. "He was angry, but not drunk. He was angry at being made a fool of, which I could understand. I offered him one punch, hands behind my back. And he's about 30 years younger than me, and in a hell of a lot better shape, so he could have really done some damage if he'd wanted to. But he didn't hit me. I offered to let him, and it was like letting the air out of a tire. He just deflated right before my eyes. Then he told me, 'The truth is, I lost Donna the second she saw you again at Vicky and Ryan's house. But none of us would admit it until tonight. I told her, and I'm telling you, Michael: you screw it up with her again, I'm not gonna be there for her to use to get back at you or make you jealous. So maybe you don't screw it up this time, because neither of you wants to do that. You just want to be with each other. So be with each other already. Hasn't it been long enough?'"

"Wow," Roger said, impressed with young Matthew Cory.

"Yeah," Michael said. "I always was impressed with him, but never more than I was that night. And I didn't want to screw it up with Donna again. I had to get her out to John and Sharlene's-my brother and sister-in-law, they live on a farm-get her out to the barn, have John lock us in there, and I wouldn't let Donna out until we hashed everything out and talked it all over and really listened to and heard everything each other was saying, because I _**didn't**_ want to screw it up with her again. I think that was the first time we ever really communicated honestly with each other. And then we started dating, and a few weeks after that, we were having dinner, and that's when she told me that we loved each other and we had forgiven each other and that she didn't need another wedding ring, she just needed me, and we've been together ever since."

"I want Holly back," Roger confessed. "I want a life with her. I'd still like to marry her, but I'm certainly not going to push for that. I just want her. I just want to belong to her, and know that she belongs to me, and that we're never going to leave each other again. You know what I want, Michael? I want to know that her face will be the first thing I see when I wake up every morning for the rest of my life, and the last thing I see before I fall asleep every night."

"Then you have to work at it," Michael said. "You have to talk. You have to listen and really hear what she's saying, and she has to listen and really hear what you're saying. You can't have any secrets, and if there's anything you're insecure about or doubting, you have to be honest about that too, and not just honest about the good stuff. Letting her all the way in is scary, yeah." Michael leaned forward now, looking intently into Roger's eyes. "But it is also the best thing that will ever happen to you. Getting it right with the only woman you've ever loved is the most incredible feeling in the world."

Before Roger could say anything to that, a knock came at the door. Roger hurriedly buttoned his collar button and tightened his tie before crossing the room and opening the door to Holly. She greeted him with a big smile, then leaned in and kissed his cheek. "Hi," she said.

Michael, meanwhile, was tying his shoes, retrieving his suit jacket from the chair where he'd left it, and gathering his briefcase. His tie remained loosened.

"Hi," Roger replied with a smile. "Come in. We're just finishing up."

"I was just on my way out," Michael added. "Nice to see you again, Holly."

"You too, Michael," Holly replied. "I'd like to freshen up a bit before we leave for The Harbor Club," she said, addressing Roger then.

"Right back there," Roger said, gesturing toward the bedroom of the suite with the adjoining bathroom.

"I'll just be a minute," Holly said.

After Holly was out of earshot, Michael said, "You're having dinner at The Harbor Club?"

"Yeah, why?" Roger asked.

"Nothing," Michael said a little too quickly. At Roger's look, he said, "Okay, Donna's working tonight. I've told her not to push Holly for details on her divorce or your relationship, but it's not like I really expect her to listen to me, so just consider this a friendly warning."

"I think Holly and I can handle Donna," Roger said.

"Yeah, you say that now," Michael said.

"You say what now?" Holly asked, returning.

"When you see Donna, would you give her a message from me?" Michael asked Holly in reply.

"Sure," Holly said, a bit surprised. "What's the message?"

"Tell her to behave herself," Michael replied. "Have a good time, and Roger, I'll see you at the office at eight o'clock."

"I'll be there," Roger pledged. He shook hands with Michael before Michael bid both Holly and Roger farewell, and then Roger said, "Just let me get my jacket and I'll be ready to go. Whose car are we taking?"

"It doesn't matter to me," Holly said.

"Mine? Since I have that meeting with Michael and the Yahoo people after our dinner," Roger said as he shrugged on his jacket.

"Sure," Holly agreed.

Roger made sure he had the key to his suite, and then he surprised Holly by taking her hand, threading his fingers through hers. The look in her eyes as she looked from their linked hands to his face mingled surprise and happiness. "This okay?" he asked.

"It's very okay," she replied, her smile lighting up the whole suite.

And they headed off to The Harbor Club for dinner.


	8. A Dinner Date and a Girls' Night

Roger and Holly were seated at a table overlooking the harbor for which The Harbor Club was named. After placing their dinner orders-prime rib for Roger, pasta primavera for Holly, with a nice wine-Roger said, "So how was your meeting?"

"It went well," Holly replied. "We got everything settled. Well, almost everything. But the rest of it won't take long to settle. Ross said that I should get the final decree in mid-August at the earliest, but if not then, it shouldn't be too much longer after that."

"That's good," Roger said. "That's really good."

"I'm very relieved," Holly replied. The waiter returned with their wine then. After the waiter had departed, she asked, "How was the preparation for your big meeting tonight?"

"It went well," Roger said. "I found and corrected some mistakes on the growth rate numbers Michael had in the projections, and if this meeting goes well tonight with the Yahoo people, I think Michael might offer me a job."

"Really? That's terrific," Holly said enthusiastically. "Would you take it?"

"I think I would," Roger replied. "Michael and I always did work well together, and this is a new experience for me. He's the only person I've ever worked with that I know isn't using me and won't screw me over to get what he wants. Well, except for you when we were both at WSPR."

"I'm flattered to be in such esteemed company," Holly said. "It's obvious that you think very highly of Michael, and that he thinks very highly of you. I hope your meeting with the bigwigs from Yahoo goes really well tonight, and that Michael offers you a job with him."

Roger picked up his wineglass then. "I'd like to propose a toast," he said. Holly picked up her wineglass and looked at Roger expectantly. "To the future," he said.

"To the future," she echoed before touching her glass to his.

After they had each taken a drink, Roger said, "I've been doing a lot of thinking lately, about us."

"So have I," Holly said.

"I don't want there to be any more misunderstandings between us," Roger continued.

"Neither do I," Holly agreed. "We just have to talk to each other, keep the lines of communication open at all times."

"And be honest with each other," Roger added, "even when it's not...well, not pleasant, or not pretty."

"Yes, we do," Holly said. "Communication is important. Neither of us is a mind reader."

"No, we're not. Although you know me better than anyone else in the world." He reached across the table for her hand, and she slipped her hand into his.

"And no one knows me better than you do," she replied. "I know that I have to earn my way back into your life. I _**want**_ to earn my way back into your life. I want you to reach the point where you know that you can trust me to never leave you or cheat on you again, to never hurt you the way I did two years ago."

"I want to reach that point too," Roger said. Holly could see that he was considering something for a few seconds. Then he said, "Before you got to The Bayshore, Michael and I were talking about you and me, and about him and Donna, and what he went through with Donna, and I told him what I really want. And now I want to tell _**you**_ what I really want, because what I really want has to do with you." Holly looked at him intently. Roger met her gaze just as intently and said, "I want to know that your face will be the first thing I see when I wake up every morning, and the last thing I see before I fall asleep every night."

Holly's expression softened. "I miss waking up with you," she said softly.

"I miss everything about you," Roger replied just as softly.

"I miss everything about you too," Holly said.

"My goal is to get to the point where neither one of us has to miss anything about each other ever again," Roger said.

Holly's breath caught in her throat at this. She took a sip of her wine, then said, "I'm supposed to be the one wooing you."

"It was never established that we can't woo each other," Roger pointed out.

"That's true," she said.

"And if we're going to make it work this time, everything has to be mutual. We have to trust each other. We have to be committed to each other. We have to respect each other, and listen to each other," Roger continued.

"Absolutely, yes," Holly agreed fervently. "That's what I want."

"It's what I want too," Roger replied. "You said that you're all in, with earning back my trust and wooing me and proving that I don't have to be afraid to let you in again. Well, I'm all in too, Holly. I don't want anybody else but you. I want us back. I want us to work."

She beamed at him. "Me too," she said. "So does this mean we're dating now?"

"Yeah, I think it does," Roger realized. He smiled at her now. "So, time, patience, honesty, communication, everything has to be mutual...am I forgetting anything vital here?"

"Not that I know of," Holly replied.

Their dinners arrived then. Somewhat reluctantly, they let go of each other's hands so they could eat. While they ate, they discussed their respective days-Holly's pre-divorce meeting, the fact that she sold her shares of the _Journal_ to Fletcher and yes, she got a fair price for them, enough that she could explore her options now, and that she had a meeting the next afternoon about a possible business opportunity, but she didn't want to go into it until she knew more about it, because it was in the very preliminary stages at this point, and Roger and Michael's afternoon of work and plans for their meeting with the Yahoo people tonight, and how Yahoo would revolutionize computers, bringing pretty much the entire world into people's living rooms on their personal computers.

When they had finished dinner and were sipping their coffees, Roger looked a bit anxious. "I'm not sure how long it's going to take to straighten everything out with Dinah and Hart, and for me to get a divorce," he said.

"We have time," Holly said. "I'm going to be by your side every step of the way through this, no matter what happens." She reached across the center of the table to rest her hand on his arm.

Before Roger could say anything more, Donna Love appeared at their table with a big smile on her face. "Well, this is a lovely surprise!" she greeted them enthusiastically. "Hello again, Roger, Holly."

Holly gently squeezed Roger's arm before reluctantly removing her hand. "Hello, Donna," she replied.

"Nice to see you again," Roger added.

"I hope you enjoyed your dinner," Donna continued.

"Everything was wonderful," Roger said.

"Excellent," Holly agreed.

"Have you had dessert yet?" Donna asked.

"They don't have time for dessert." Roger, Holly, and Donna all three turned to look and saw Michael Hudson approaching them. "At least, Roger doesn't."

Roger looked at his watch. "I didn't realize it was getting so late," he said.

"Yeah, it's about that time, buddy," Michael replied.

Roger looked at Holly apologetically. "I hope this doesn't make me the worst date ever."

She stood up so he did too, and then she crossed to him and straightened his tie. "Of course it doesn't," she assured him. "We both lost track of time. I'm taking that as a good sign." She smiled, and Roger smiled back at her, relieved. "Go. Lock up this deal."

"How will you get back to the Bayshore to pick up your car?" Roger asked.

"I can give Holly a lift, it's no trouble at all," Donna piped up.

"Thank you," Holly told Donna. Then Holly looked at Roger again. "I'll call you when I get home."

"All right," Roger said. "Drive safely, and yes, call me when you get home so I know you made it there all right."

"I will," Holly agreed.

After Holly and Roger quickly hugged goodbye, Donna asked Holly, "Could you stay and have dessert with me? On the house."

Holly looked at her own watch now. She didn't see the harm in staying for dessert with Donna. "All right," she agreed.

Michael put his arm around Donna's shoulders and pulled her against his side then. "Donna, behave yourself," he said sternly.

"Don't I always?" she retorted with a grin. Michael's answer to that was a snort.

"Watch yourself," Roger said in an undertone so only Holly could hear him. "Michael never snorts or scoffs unless it's practically a given that what he's snorting or scoffing at will happen."

"I'll be fine," Holly assured Roger.

Michael kissed Donna goodbye with one final warning to behave herself, and then Donna and Holly were alone together. They sat down at Roger and Holly's table again, and Donna flagged down one of the waiters. "Paul, please bring us two slices of the Chocolate Raspberry Liqueur Cake, and bring a fresh pot of coffee as well."

"Right away, Ms. Love," Paul the waiter said before hurrying off.

Holly decided to take the bull by the horns. "I know you're dying to know how Roger and I ended up breaking up," she said, "so I'll save you any attempts at subtlety and just tell you. One of Roger's ex-wives set it up to look like he was cheating on me with her. I believed it, went out and cheated on him, found out it was all a lie, and I felt horribly guilty for having_** really** _cheated on Roger when he _**didn't** _really cheat on me, and I got scared and so because this other man was supposedly more stable than Roger and I didn't have a history with him other than as co-workers, I continued seeing him and ultimately I married him even though we had next to nothing in common, and it wasn't long before I realized I had made the biggest mistake of my life, which I am now in the process of rectifying by getting a divorce and working to earn back Roger's trust." Donna looked at Holly, shocked. Holly mistook Donna's shock for scandalization and said, "I know, I'm a horrible person-"

Donna interrupted her. "Well, if you are, then I am too, because I did pretty much the exact same thing you did."

Now it was Holly who looked at Donna in shock. "You didn't," she said as Paul the waiter returned with two cake plates with huge slices of Chocolate Raspberry Liqueur Cake, a pot of coffee, and a coffee cup and saucer for Donna.

After Paul took his leave, Donna said, "I did." She poured herself a cup of coffee and offered Holly a refill of her own coffee. At Holly's nod, Donna topped off her coffee and picked up her fork to dig into her cake.

"I thought Michael was cheating on me," Donna began. "He told me he was, and he moved out. He was very cold and distant to me for months afterward whenever we saw each other. I was one of the bridesmaids at his brother's wedding, and after the happy couple left the reception for their honeymoon, Michael picked a fight with me and made this big scene in front of half the town. At that point, I figured I'd lost him, so I started getting on with my own life, spending time with our daughters, our grandson-we only had one grandson at the time-getting a real job for the first time in my life, not because I needed the money but just to have something to do, and much to my surprise, I found that I not only enjoyed working, but I was good at it. But no matter how much I tried to fill my life, I was hurt and angry and finally I became very lonely, so several months after Michael left me, I slept with this man I worked with at the time. We had been getting much closer since I started working with him, and so I slept with him...so of course that was the same night that Michael showed up at the front door at 2:00 in the morning to tell me that he _**wasn't**_ having an affair. He had been working for the Agency again, and he left me to protect me, but his assignment was over. The criminal he'd been after was dead, he never cheated on me, and he could come home now."

"What did you do?" Holly asked.

"I lied, of course," Donna replied. "I covered up my slip off the fidelity wagon and let Michael come home, but I gave him hell for what he put me through, and all the while, I was terrified that he would find out what I had done. It took us several months to get back on an even keel, and then, of course, he _**did**_ find out, and in the worst possible way: in court, in public. One of our daughters was on trial for attempted murder. I confessed to keep her from going to jail, and I gave my one-night stand as my motive. I really thought Marley had shot him, but he had it coming. There were several suspects in his shooting, all of them women. But when Michael found out, he filed for divorce. It turned out Marley hadn't shot Jake, and neither did I, and he recovered. It took years for Michael and I to find our way back to each other. He left town for four years, and I ended up marrying someone else. Not Jake, though. That would have been a little_** too** _Noel Coward."

"Too Noel Coward?" Holly asked, puzzled. She reached for her coffee cup and took a sip.

"Did I mention Jake was my ex-son-in-law? Marley's ex-husband? And he was my other daughter Victoria's boyfriend first, because Jake and Victoria grew up together," Donna replied. Holly choked on her coffee. "Talk about a terrible person, right?" Donna said wryly.

Holly wiped her mouth with her napkin and took a deep, shuddering breath. When she had recovered herself, she said, "I wouldn't say that." She paused for a moment, then said, "You said Jake and Victoria grew up together. Don't you mean Jake and Victoria and Marley grew up together? Victoria and Marley are identical twins, aren't they?"

"Yes, but my father robbed me of Victoria's childhood," Donna replied. "Actually, he robbed me of Victoria's entire existence. I didn't know I gave birth to twins. Back then, women were knocked unconscious to give birth. He gave Victoria up for adoption, and she grew up alone, not knowing that Michael and I were her parents or that she had a twin sister. My father also forced me to raise Marley as my sister instead of my daughter. It wasn't until Michael came back into my life when Marley was 18, and Victoria came to town shortly thereafter, with Jake in tow, having learned that Michael and I were her birth parents and tracked us down that we even knew Victoria existed. That's also when Marley found out that I was her mother and not her sister. My father, pardon the crudity of what I'm about to say, was a real bastard. He killed my mother and terrorized my sister and brother and I. My sister Nicole had a promising future as a fashion designer, but first she was sidetracked by cocaine addiction, and then she killed the man our mother had had an affair with, which is why our father killed her, after which she suffered a complete breakdown. She's been institutionalized ever since...seven years now. And my brother Peter got himself in some legal trouble, then he got out of legal trouble, and then he decided that he had disgraced himself before our family so much that he disowned himself. I hear from him once a year, at Christmas. He left ten years ago and I don't think I'm ever going to see him again."

"That sounds sort of similar to my family, actually," Holly said. "My father left when I was a baby. My mother had to raise me and my two brothers alone. One of my brothers is catatonic in an institution, and the other one is in prison. And when my father came back into our lives when we were all grown, he wasn't there for long before someone murdered him because of the way he'd been living his life all those years."

"My father's dead too," Donna said. "Thankfully. If he hadn't died when and how he did, I'm really afraid that Michael would have killed him. I never loved my father, I only feared and resented him, but he did do one thing that I have to be grateful to him for: he hired Michael to work in our stables, and that's how he and I met."

"The only good thing my father ever did for me was introduce me to Roger," Holly mused. "Roger worked for my father, and that's how we met." Holly finally took a bite of her cake. "That is fantastic," she said after chewing and swallowing. "That is the best chocolate cake I've ever tasted in my life."

"Isn't it?" Donna said proudly. "My dessert chef is French. I got into this outrageous bidding war with Felicia-" At Holly's blank look, Donna explained, "Felicia Gallant. She owns a restaurant here in Bay City, too-TOPS. Anyway, Felicia and I both wanted Emile to work for us, and we're not what you would call friends anyway, but I emerged victorious, and so Emile plies his trade here. This cake is so sinfully delicious, I privately refer to it as a chocolate orgasm."

"I won't argue with that appellation," Holly said, cutting another bite of cake and eating it.

"So, we both had evil fathers, we each have a sibling in a mental institution, the men in our lives were both in the CIA," Donna said. "We're both mothers, grandmothers, businesswomen."

And so Holly and Donna spent the next few hours eating Chocolate Raspberry Liqueur Cake, drinking coffee, and talking about their sometimes difficult relationships with their daughters, their work lives, their grandsons and sons-in-law and exes (though Holly did not mention that Ross was one of her exes), their parents and siblings, and of course Roger and Michael. After one cup of coffee, Donna switched to wine, and before long Donna was well and truly blasted, and Holly let herself be talked into one more glass of wine, so she was a little bit tipsy. When Donna offered her another glass of wine, Holly declined. "I have a very important meeting tomorrow afternoon, and I have no intention of showing up to it with a hangover."

"Great! More wine for me then!" Donna exclaimed. She poured herself another glass from the bottle she had had Paul bring to the table, draining the bottle in the process. "So," she continued after fortifying herself with a healthy sip of the wine, "you and Roger...You're gonna get back together, right?"

"I certainly hope so," Holly replied. "That's what we both want, ultimately. We just have some things to work out first."

"You ever think of working them out physically?" Donna inquired, tilting her wineglass and watching the wine swirl for several seconds.

"Working them out physically?" Holly asked, bemused.

Donna sat back in her chair and appeared to be thinking. "How does Victoria put it?" She frowned, thinking for several seconds. "Oh! I remember! 'Rock his world.' That's how she puts it."

"Rock his world," Holly repeated. She was just tipsy enough to be a bit slow on the uptake tonight. "You mean sex," she realized. "At this point, that would just complicate things. The last thing I need is a repeat of Cliff House, but with our roles reversed this time."

"Remind me to ask you later what Cliff House is," Donna said before taking another drink of her wine.

"If you keep drinking like that, I expect I'll have to remind you what your name is later," Holly replied dryly.

Donna laughed at that, a boisterous, full-throated laugh. "This is fun!" she said. "I've never met any woman I've had this much in common with before. I've never had a woman friend before in my life."

"I haven't had one since I was a sophomore in high school," Holly replied.

"Are you having fun?" Donna asked seriously then.

"You know what? I am. I really am," Holly said.

"So does this mean we're getting to be friends?" Donna asked hopefully.

"I think so," Holly replied.

"Wonderful!" Donna exclaimed. "I've never been a friend before, but I'll do my best to be a good one to you, Holly. And as your friend, it is my duty to help you win Roger back. So, rocking Roger's world" here Donna tripped over the words, which made her dissolve into laughter again. "That is out for the time being."

"Yes," Holly said firmly.

"Okay, something else, something else, something romantic," Donna mused.

"It's not going to happen overnight," Holly said.

"No, I don't suppose it is," Donna agreed. "But it's fun to do romantic things for the men sometimes." Donna lapsed into silence, finished the wine, and then said, "I've got it! A serenade!"

"Excuse me?" Holly said.

"A serendade...seren...seren...Oh, you know what I mean! Where you show up unannounced late at night and sing to Roger!" Donna exclaimed.

"About the nicest thing you can say about my voice is that I can carry a tune. I'm no Aretha Franklin," Holly replied.

"And I'm no Barbra Streisand, but I've sung to Michael before," Donna said. "Did you ever hear her Broadway album? Phemonemal."

"Phenomenal?" Holly asked.

"You have heard it!" Donna exclaimed happily.

Holly hadn't, but Donna was so hammered that Holly decided it wasn't worth it to point that out.

And Holly herself was just tipsy enough that she thought serenading Roger was an interesting idea. "It's not that late," she pointed out.

Donna squinted at her watch, wasn't able to make out the time, and gave up. "It's late enough," she said, airily waving a hand.

"You're in no shape to drive, and I'm not sure I am either, not that my car is here. It's still at the Bayshore," Holly continued.

"I'll call for a town car," Donna said. "Michael and I have an account there. Now, are you out of excuses yet?"

Holly thought for a minute, but couldn't come up with any good reason not to go along with Donna's idea. "What am I going to sing?" she asked.

"You and Roger don't have a song?" Donna asked.

"Not one in particular," Holly replied. "There's more than one that reminds me of him, or has meaning for us."

"Good, that'll give us something to figure out on the car ride!" Donna exclaimed. She got up, stumbling slightly. "I'm going to go and call for that town car. Wait here." There was a phone at the bar, so Donna returned a minute later, crowing that the town car was on the way and would be there in just a few minutes.

Which is how Holly found herself in the backseat of a gray town car with Donna Love, being driven to Michael's office at almost 10:30 PM by a suit-clad chauffeur named Jerome.

Donna drunkenly chattered on, singing a few fragments of songs, mostly from Broadway musicals and '60s girl groups, neither of which was really Holly's favorite kind of music, or included any of the songs that reminded her of Roger.

When they stepped off the elevator on the twentieth floor, which was dark and seemingly deserted, Holly began to have second thoughts. "This way," Donna stage whispered.

Holly followed Donna down the hall, which was lit only by dim safety lights in the ceiling and the red exit signs at each end of the long hallway.

"Donna, it looks like they've already left," Holly said.

"They're probably having celebrity...celebratay...having a drink in Michael's office," Donna said. She continued slowly making her way down the hall, with Holly following after, becoming more convinced with each step that Michael and Roger were not here.

Donna tripped and stumbled against a closed door. Holly tried to help her stand up straight again, but Donna waved her off. "I'm fine, I'm fine," she insisted. "And we're here. This is Michael's office suite."

Indeed, they were in front of an oak door. The safety lights directly above them illuminated the writing on the door: HUDSON ENTERPRISES MICHAEL S. HUDSON, PRESIDENT AND CEO.

Holly peered through the rectangular window that was next to the door. "It's totally dark in there," she reported. "It looks like they've already left."

Donna, however, wasn't listening. She was drunkenly fumbling through her purse, muttering, "I have a key."

"Donna, they're not here!" Holly insisted, but Donna was still looking for her key to Michael's office.

"All right, FREEZE!" shouted a deep bass voice from behind them. Holly's hands instinctively shot up in the air of their own accord in the universal gesture of surrender. Donna was still looking for her key and starting to become agitated that she couldn't find the keys. Then all of the bright, fluorescent lights in the corridor went on. Holly turned around, her hands still up, and found herself face to face with a six-foot-eight-inch scowling security guard holding a gun on her and Donna.

"Um, Donna..." Holly said.

"A-ha! Found it!" Donna exclaimed triumphantly. Only then did she notice all the lights were on, and the angry security guard with a gun. "What are you doing, pointing a gun at us?" she asked the guard indignantly.

"You're trespassing after hours," the guard replied crisply.

"Trespassing?" Donna scoffed. "I'll have you know that I have a key to this office! I am Michael Hudson's..." She trailed off. "Holly, what's the word I'm looking for?"

"Significant other?" Holly suggested.

"Yes!" Donna said. "I am Michael Hudson's sinfinicant other! And this is my friend Holly, and she is Roger Thorpe's sinkifigent other, and Roger and Michael are in there!"

"Mr. Hudson and Mr. Thorpe left an hour and a half ago," the guard reported, "and I don't care if you're the Queen of England and her main lady in waiting, you're trespassing. Come with me. I'm calling the police to pick you up."

"Go right ahead!" Donna challenged, sticking her chin in the air. "My son-in-law is the commissioner!"

"Yeah, right," the guard said. "Look, ladies, we can do this the easy way or the hard way."

"The easy way," Holly blurted. "We'll come with you without any trouble. Come on, Donna."

"Michael is going to hear about this!" Donna insisted as she followed after Holly, refusing to put her hands up when the guard asked her to. "And so will your boss, and the police commissioner and the whole police force!"

In the security office, the guard told Holly, "You can put your hands down, ma'am, just keep them where I can see them."

"I guarantee you I'm not armed," Holly replied. "You can look for yourself." She gave the guard her purse. After a cursory look through its contents, he returned it to her with a nod.

"Your turn," the guard told Donna.

"Absolutely not!" Donna said, clutching her bag to her chest with both hands. "Look at how this small is. Do you really think I'm carrying a concealed weapon?"

"I wouldn't put anything past you," the guard replied, picking up his phone and dialing the Bay City Police Department.

Officer Josie Watts, who, coincidentally, was the daughter of Michael's brother and sister-in-law John and Sharlene (John was Josie's stepfather, and no adoption had ever taken place, but John had been a part of Josie's life since she was 16 years old and was the only father she had ever known, so it wasn't long after John and Sharlene's first wedding that she had started calling him 'Dad,' since that's what she considered him, and the habit had remained ever since), answered the phone at the police station. She thought she recognized Donna from the security guard's description, and when Donna began protesting the "criminal treatment" she and her friend Holly were receiving from this baboon with a badge, Josie instantly recognized the voice as belonging to Donna. "We'll send someone right away," Josie promised, and then she hung up from the security guard and called her boss and friend and quasi-relative (Michael's daughter Vicky was married to him) Ryan Harrison.

So it was that fifteen minutes after being marched to the security guard's office, a knock came at the door, and the guard opened it to a tall man in his early thirties with wavy brown hair and blue eyes, wearing jeans, sneakers, and with the sleeves of his gray-and-white-plaid shirt rolled up to his elbows. "Commissioner Ryan Harrison, Bay City P.D.," the man introduced himself as he flashed his badge at the guard.

"Ryan! Thank God you're here! Will you tell this baboon with a badge who we are and that we were not traipsing...treppsing...tresprass...that we're not here to rob the place?" Donna exclaimed.

"She claims that she's Mr. Hudson's significant other and the other one is her friend," the guard told Ryan.

"She is Mr. Hudson's significant other," Ryan replied. "Her name is Donna Love. And her friend is-" Ryan looked at Holly.

"Holly Lindsey," Holly said.

"Right," Ryan said.

"Well, even if they are who they claimed to be, they're still trespassing, because it's after hours and neither Mr. Hudson nor Mr. Thorpe are here," the guard stubbornly insisted.

"I can virtually guarantee you that Mr. Hudson will not be pressing charges," Ryan said. "I'll see that they get home."

"Have at it, and good luck," the guard said. "The redhead cooperated fully, but the brunette wouldn't listen to a word I said!"

Ryan smiled wryly. "Believe me, you're not the only one who's made that observation about the brunette," he said dryly. "Ladies, if you'll come with me?" Donna nearly fell over her own feet when she tried to stand up. Ryan said nothing, just helped her to her feet, despite her insistence that she could make it on her own.

Ryan seemed more amused than anything else in the elevator on the way down. "What's so funny?" Donna asked him after finishing her diatribe against the security guard.

"You tying one on and trying to break into Michael's office," Ryan replied.

"I was not trying to break into Michael's office, I have a key!" Donna insisted. "And I did not tie one on."

"Oh no?" Ryan asked. "I haven't seen anyone this blasted since Bridget the night Vicky and I finally got married."

"You haven't even been married a year yet and you're against romance!" Donna exclaimed.

"No, I'm not," Ryan said. "I was half afraid I'd come down here and find you wearing a trench coat and high heels until Josie told me another woman was with you. Then I figured you weren't here to flash Michael, but I still don't know what you_** were** _doing here."

"Looking for Roger," Donna said.

Ryan looked at Holly now. "Roger's your husband, I take it?" he asked.

"Ah, no," Holly said. "But we are...well...it's complicated. He's my significant other...sort of."

"I haven't introduced you yet!" Donna exclaimed then. "Ryan, this is my friend Holly Lindsey. Holly, this is my son-in-law Ryan Harrison."

"It's nice to meet you, Holly, the circumstances notwithstanding," Ryan said, extending his hand for her to shake.

"It's nice to meet you too," Holly replied. "I really don't have an explanation for my behavior tonight. I just...I had a little more to drink than I usually do, and when Donna suggested coming down here to serenade Roger, I thought it sounded like a good idea."

"She's trying to win him back," Donna said then, leaning back against the wall of the elevator and wiping her forehead with the back of her hand. "Earn back his trust. You know what that's like, Ryan. So do I. I was just trying to help." Then something occurred to her. Her eyes snapped open and she looked as hard at Ryan as she could, given her inebriated state. "You're not going to tell Victoria about this, are you?" she asked, horrified.

The elevator doors opened, and Donna stumbled off the elevator backwards, still awaiting Ryan's answer about Vicky. "She already knows. I was at home when Josie called and interrupted our romantic evening," Ryan replied. "You're lucky Bridget's still out with her bowling team celebrating their league win, or else Vicky would have come down here with me. As it is, I'm not going to get one minute of sleep tonight until I give her chapter and verse. And I owe her five dollars."

"Why do you owe her five dollars?" Donna asked.

"Because she said it sounded like you got drunk before trying to storm Michael's office," Ryan replied. "I the fool said you weren't necessarily drunk, maybe you were just trying to spice things up, or make up from a fight. She conceded my point about the possibility of a fight, but said that you and Michael are spicy enough as it is, so that wasn't why you were here. So she was right: you got blasted before coming down here."

"I did not!" Donna said, stopping too fast and stumbling a bit in the process. Only Ryan's quick reflexes kept her from kissing the pavement, since they had reached the parking lot by now.

"Donna, you would flunk the Breathalyzer with flying colors," Ryan said as he steadied Donna on her feet. He looked at Holly now. "I don't know where you'd fall on that scale," he told her, "but I'm hoping that if you two drove down here, that you were the one behind the wheel, Holly."

"We didn't drive ourselves. Donna hired a car and driver," Holly replied.

"I'll take that Breathalyzer test and show you!" Donna interjected then.

"Are you taking us to the police station?" Holly asked when they had reached Ryan's squad car.

"Why?" Ryan asked, looking at Holly in surprise as he prepared the Breathalyzer for Donna. "You didn't drive here yourselves. I take it that gray town car over there is the one you came in?" Holly nodded. "I guess technically you were trespassing, but it's not like Michael is going to press charges. I was going to just take Donna home, but Vicky called her parents' place while I was getting dressed, and there was no answer."

"Michael's probably still with Roger. They must be at The Bayshore," Holly said. "That's where Roger is staying."

"Okay, then, I'll take you both to The Bayshore," Ryan replied. He handed Donna the Breathalyzer. "Blow," he directed. After she did, Ryan read the numbers. "Mmm hmm. You, Donna, are legally intoxicated. Three times the legal limit, in fact."

"Well, clearly, it's wrong," Donna insisted. "Holly, you do it."

"Holly's not anywhere near as crocked as you are," Ryan retorted.

"Well, I bet that little thingy still says she is!" Donna exclaimed.

"I don't mind," Holly said. "I'll take the test."

Ryan cleaned the mouthpiece, reset the machine, and gave it to Holly. "Four-tenths of a degree to spare," Ryan reported. "You are _**not** _legally intoxicated, Holly."

"What?" Donna yelped. "That little thingy is definitely broken, Ryan!"

Ryan smiled benignly. "Whatever you say, Donna." He opened the back door of the police car and gestured to the empty backseat. "I'm just going to go and tell your driver that you won't be needing him anymore tonight, and then I'll take you to The Bayshore. I won't be a minute." He closed the car door after Holly had helped Donna into the car, and then hurried off to dismiss the driver.

Donna rested her head against the cool glass of the window. "I'm sorry this didn't go as planned," she said, turning to look at Holly.

"I didn't know what song to sing anyway," Holly replied. "I was trying to remember the words to 'Heart and Soul,' but I couldn't even remember the whole first verse, and I couldn't think of any songs with his name in them, and I don't think I could sing in front of an audience anyway, even if the audience is you and Michael."

Ryan returned then, and the drive to The Bayshore didn't take long, less than ten minutes in fact.

And so it was that Roger and Michael were surprised at the knock on the door of Roger's suite. "I bet Holly came back to say good night," Michael said.

Holly was indeed at the door when Roger opened it, looking more than a little chagrined, but she wasn't alone. Donna, listing to one side, was standing next to her and being held upright by a thirtyish man dressed casually. "Roger Thorpe?" the man asked.

"Yes?" Roger asked, wondering what this was about.

Michael heard and recognized the voice. "Ryan?" he asked as he joined Roger at the door.

"You are here," Ryan greeted his father-in-law. Ryan looked at Holly then. "You were right," he said.

"Who are you and what's going on?" Roger asked Ryan.

"Ryan Harrison," Ryan said, extending the hand that wasn't keeping Donna upright to Roger. "Donna and Holly had a bit of a misadventure at Michael's office. One of the security guards found them prowling the hallway outside the office after hours, looking for the two of you, and called the police. Josie got the call at the station house and recognized Donna from the guard's description of her, and she also heard Donna protesting rather loudly, so she called me at home. I went down there to make sure they got home safely. There was no answer at your place, Michael, and Holly said she thought you and Roger would be here."

Michael peered at Donna critically. "You're blitzed!" Michael exclaimed, surprised.

Donna snorted indelicately. "I'm not so think as you drunk I am, Michael!" she exclaimed indignantly.

Michael couldn't stop himself from laughing. "Sure you're not," he said. "You're going to feel like hell in the morning."

"Well, that's in the morning," Donna said. "Right now, I'm feeling really good, and if you take me home, we can feel really good together." She stumbled the few steps into the suite to snake her arms around Michael's waist. "Come on, double-oh-seven. You're the spy who loved me...Hey! Holly! There's a song! 'The Spy Who Loved Me'! Carly Simon! Or was it Carole King?"

"Uh, Carly Simon, and no, I don't think so," Holly said.

"Song?" Roger asked, puzzled.

"Holly was going to surprise you with a serem-serenday-a song, but you weren't at Michael's office," Donna told Roger. She was still standing there with her arms around Michael, and he jumped when she goosed him.

"Donna!" Michael yelped, his voice an octave higher than normal.

"Oh, come on, Michael, you love it when we play Secret Agent Man and horny Bond Girl," Donna said, trying to sound flirtatious. Michael grimaced slightly.

"And on that note, I'm out of here," Ryan said. "I don't even think Vicky would want to know that. I certainly don't."

"When I get you alone, I'm gonna show you something that's for your eyes only," Donna said as she started to loosen Michael's tie.

"Thank you, Ryan," Michael said as he stilled Donna's fumbling fingers.

"Yes, thank you, Ryan," Holly echoed.

"Well, thank you for cooperating, Holly," Ryan said. "Mr. Thorpe, nice meeting you," he shook Roger's hand here, "Michael, you're welcome and good luck, Donna...Good night." Then Ryan left.

"I still don't think I'm legally drunk," Donna grumbled after Ryan had departed.

"You failed the Breathalyzer?" Michael asked, frowning.

"It was broken!" Donna insisted. "It's not like we were driving anyway! I called for a car."

Michael raked a hand through his hair. "You're just damned lucky that Josie was the one who got the initial call and that she called Ryan to take care of it," he said.

"Oh, like you would have pressed charges!" Donna said.

"I wouldn't have, no," Michael agreed, "but even though you weren't driving, you could have been charged with being intoxicated in public."

"What public?" Donna wanted to know.

Michael took a deep breath. "We're not doing this here," he said. "We're going home."

Donna smiled. "Finally," she said. She looked at Holly now. "I had a lot of fun. We'll have to do it again soon," she said.

"Only with a lot less wine next time," Holly said. Before Holly could say anything else, Donna started to slump to the floor, the effects of too much wine. Michael caught her before she fell, but she was out cold.

"She's gonna have one hell of a hangover in the morning," Michael said with a sigh as he gathered Donna up in his arms.

"Yeah, she will," Holly agreed. "Don't be too hard on her, Michael. She was just trying to be helpful, and I was just tipsy enough that it sounded like a good idea at the time."

"No matter how much or how little Donna remembers about tonight in the morning," Michael said, "I'll make sure she knows what a good friend you were to her tonight, Holly. I appreciate it."

"She's been a good friend to me tonight too," Holly said, "the results of our little escapade aside."

Roger held the door open. "You need any help getting her downstairs or in the car or anything?" he asked.

"No, I've got her," Michael said. "I think we'll have to put off our meeting until tomorrow afternoon now, though."

"Not a problem," Roger assured him. "Give me a call sometime late tomorrow morning and we'll nail down a time."

"I will," Michael said. "Good night."

"Good night," Roger said.

After Michael had left with Donna, Roger closed the door. "So, how was your meeting with the Yahoo people?" Holly asked brightly.

"It went well," Roger replied. "Michael offered me a job. Vice President of Internet Acquisitions. I'm taking it."

"That's wonderful," Holly said. She couldn't keep up the pretense, though. "Okay," she said. "Let's have it."

Roger just smiled. "You were going to serenade me?" he asked.

"If I could have remembered the words to 'Heart and Soul,' maybe," Holly replied. "It was Donna's idea. She and I have a lot in common, not just you and Michael. Her father was a monster too, possibly even worse than mine. She's had difficult relationships with both of her daughters at times. She has three grandsons, I have two. We both work and enjoy working. And she and Michael went through something similar to you and me. She suggested the serenade after I ruled out...you know..."

"You know...Oh!" Roger realized. "Yeah, the last thing we need right now is a reprise of Cliff House but with our roles reversed."

"I said that very thing!" Holly exclaimed. "It's not like I haven't thought about it, but no, I know we don't need that right now. It's not going to be one night out of time. That's not what I want."

"It's not what I want either," Roger said. "And I agree, we're nowhere near ready to make love again yet. Although I have to admit, I've thought about it too."_ For the last almost two years,_ he added silently. "That's why I know you'll understand what I'm about to do."

"What are you about to do?" Holly asked, her heart beginning to pound as the hope that Roger was going to kiss her blossomed fully in her chest.

"Wait here," Roger said. He disappeared back into the bedroom of the suite with its adjoining bathroom. He returned a couple of minutes later holding a toothbrush still in its package, a travel-sized tube of toothpaste, and one of his white button-down shirts. "You're in no shape to drive back to Springfield tonight," he said as he handed her the shirt, toothbrush and toothpaste. "So you're going to stay here tonight. You can have the bedroom, and I'll sleep on the couch. You said your meeting tomorrow isn't until tomorrow afternoon, so you'll have time to either go home to freshen up, or go shopping here for anything you need and still make your meeting, and since you're not nearly as blasted as Donna was, you won't feel like turning off the sun tomorrow morning. So please, stay here tonight, so I know that you're safe."

Holly nodded as she took the shirt and toiletries from Roger. "I will," she said. "Thank you."

"Anytime," Roger replied. He changed into his own pajamas and took a pillow and extra blanket out to the couch while Holly was in the bathroom before returning to the bedroom to turn down the bed for her. When she emerged from the bathroom, having brushed her teeth and washed her face and wearing his shirt, her legs and feet bare beneath it and the cuffs rolled up so they weren't covering her hands, she didn't miss the fact that he swallowed hard at the sight of her. "Well," Roger said, forcing his eyes to meet hers and seeing that she knew the effect she was having on him. Seeing him in his black pajamas was having an effect on her as well, because it had been far too long since they had been in the same room this late at night, even though they were not going to be sleeping in the same bed.

"Yeah," Holly said. "We should both get some sleep."

"Call me if you need anything," Roger said.

"I will," Holly said. "Good night, Roger."

"Good night, Holly," Roger replied.

Then Holly got into bed and turned out the lights, and Roger went out to the living room and turned out the lights before settling himself on the couch.

And they both lay awake for a long time, thinking about one another, before finally falling asleep, in two separate rooms only twelve feet apart.


	9. Two Meetings With Rachel Cory

_**I'm not sure how many people reading this are aware of the histories of both GL and Another World, but there's something of an inside joke in this chapter which I just couldn't resist putting in, and which I'll explain at the end of the chapter. **_

* * *

Holly awoke the next morning with a dull headache, but otherwise none the worse for wear. Dinner with Roger the night before had been great, and while she was surprised to find that Donna had had many similar experiences to her own, Holly had enjoyed getting to know her last night over cake and coffee and, in Donna's case, too much wine. Thankfully, Donna's son-in-law had been understanding. Even more thankfully, Holly had recalled her own previous experiences with too much wine (her birthday four years ago, and then the night she had too much to drink at the country club and shoved Blake, fully dressed, into the swimming pool in the middle of their latest argument about Ross had both come to mind the night before and kept her from imbibing as much and as freely as Donna had) and kept her alcohol intake at a manageable level. True, she had been just tipsy enough to go along with Donna's scheme to go to Michael's office in search of Roger that late at night, and apparently Donna had intended for Holly to serenade Roger. True, a serenade was romantic, and now Holly remembered Cass's words about not being afraid to get a little crazy when you're working to earn your way back into your soulmate's life. She wouldn't rule out the possibility of serenading Roger at a later date (if she was going to serenade him, she would really rather it was just the two of them), but it would have to be the right song, a song that said something about them and their relationship, that had some meaning for them.

She gingerly sat up, grateful that the pain in her head did not increase or throb. The bathroom door was open, the room empty. She wondered if Roger was still asleep on the couch. After splashing some cold water on her face, brushing her hair and teeth, and getting dressed, she ventured quietly into the living room of the suite.

And there was Roger, dressed and seated on the couch, reading _The Bay City Herald, _or at least pretending to; Holly wasn't sure which, because he lowered the paper before she had taken three steps into the room. "How are you feeling?" he asked, deciding to skip saying 'Good morning' in case it wasn't a good morning for her, although she hadn't been nearly as hammered as Donna had been the night before.

"Not too bad," Holly replied. "A slight, dull headache. Have you, ah, heard from Michael?"

"Not yet," Roger said, folding the newspaper and setting it aside. He got up from the couch and headed to the kitchen; his suite had a full kitchen with a microwave, refrigerator/freezer, oven, cupboards, and a small sink. He pulled a pitcher of ice water from the refrigerator, a glass and a bottle of aspirin from a cupboard, filled the glass with water, pried the lid off the aspirin bottle, and then brought the glass and two aspirin to Holly, who was now sitting in the armchair in the living room. She accepted them, swallowed the aspirin, chased them with several sips of water, and lowered the glass.

"Thank you," she said.

"Of course," he replied. "What would you like for breakfast?"

Holly looked at the kitchen. "Are you cooking?" she asked.

Roger chuckled. "No. They have excellent room service here. Pretty much anything you want, and you should eat."

"I guess just toast, scrambled eggs, and coffee," she said.

Roger nodded and made quick work of calling room service, and their breakfasts arrived a few minutes later. As they sat down across from each other at the small kitchen table and started eating, Holly said, "So, about last night..." Roger just smiled. "You're amused," Holly realized.

"Very," Roger replied honestly. "In all the years I've known you, I've never known you to have a really close female friend. You were with Donna Love for what, three hours last night, you apparently hit it off with her, and you ended up getting brought home by the police."

"Technically that's true," Holly said. "But Ryan is Donna and Michael's son-in-law. One of them. And I guess it was Michael's brother's daughter, or stepdaughter, that took the actual call from the security guard at Michael's office and sent Ryan in the first place, because he's her boss, and because it was Donna. This is one time I'm grateful for nepotism. If this had happened in Springfield, I'd probably still be in jail after having spent the night there."

"Bay City is another world compared to Springfield," Roger agreed. "I guess I just never thought of you as the being brought home by the police type."

Holly's eyes narrowed. "Now you're making fun of me," she said.

"I didn't get my serenade last night," he reminded her.

"That was Donna's idea in the first place. I was just tipsy enough that it sounded good at the time. Besides, I'd rather serenade you when it's just the two of us." She took a bite of her scrambled eggs and washed it down with ice water.

"Does that mean I can look forward to a serenade from you at a later date?" Roger asked hopefully, all traces of humor and teasing gone now.

"Maybe," Holly replied. "If I do, though, I don't intend to be tipsy or drunk when I do it."

"Why didn't you tie one on with Donna last night?" Roger asked. "You clearly had a good time together."

"We did," Holly agreed. "I just...The last couple of times I had too much to drink, it didn't work out so well for me." She paused, then said, "I have a confession to make. Not about last night, but...Well, do you remember about three years ago when you were at the country club with Jenna that night, and Blake told you she had slipped and fallen in the pool?" At Roger's nod, Holly focused on the tabletop. "She didn't fall into the pool. She was pushed in...by me. I was still angry about her and Ross at that point, and I got drunk at the country club, and she tried to talk to me and I got snippy with her and we had an argument, and then we wound up by the pool and I was so angry and so drunk that I pushed her in. Ironically, that was the night I realized that she was telling the truth about Ross loving her for real, even though I found out later that they were also arguing at the time because she had said 'I love you' to him and he hadn't said it back yet. But he broke up our argument and immediately started comforting Blake and defending her, and that's when I knew. That was one of the lowest points of my life, and definitely one of the lowest points of my relationship with Blake."

"Now I have a confession to make," Roger said. "I already knew you pushed Chrissy in the pool that night." Holly jerked her head up and looked at Roger, stunned. "Not because she told me," he added hastily. "She didn't. But when I found out that you'd been there, and been drinking, and the fact that Chrissy and Ross neither one would say a word about you...well, it was obvious what had happened. But that was between you and Chrissy. I knew I had to stay out of it, that neither one of you would have wanted me meddling, even if I was trying to help. And you patched things up. You're closer than ever now."

Holly sat back. "Why does this surprise me?" she wondered rhetorically. "You are the one person in the world who really knows me. Of course you knew I pushed Blake into the pool."

"One of my goals is to keep surprising you," Roger replied seriously. "In a good way, of course. In the best possible ways."

Holly heard a chiming then; the clock on the mantel was chiming the half hour, and she looked to see which half hour it was. "It's 10:30 already?" she exclaimed. "Oh, that's not good. I have to go home, shower and change, and then come back here for my meeting."

"What time is your meeting again?" Roger asked.

"2:00," Holly replied.

"Okay," Roger said. "It's 35 minutes from here to Springfield, another ten to get to your house, so that's 45 minutes. Thirty-five minutes to get back here. You know where the meeting is? How to get there and everything, I mean?"

"Yeah," Holly said. "That's another 20 minutes after getting into town."

Roger did some quick calculating in his head. "It might be a bit close, but you'll make it," he said confidently.

"Not if I don't leave right now," Holly said. "My car keys. Where are my-?" She was cut off by Roger, who had moved to the table by the suite's front door, where he picked up her purse and removed her car keys from the side pocket, holding them both up, the keys in his left hand, her purse in his right. She hurried to the door. "I must be a mess," she said, smoothing one hand through her hair.

"Not possible," Roger replied. Their fingers brushed when she took her purse and keys from him. "I figure you won't have time to call me when you get to the house, so drive safely," he said.

"I'll let you know how my meeting went tonight," she said.

"I look forward to it," he told her. "Good luck." He opened the door and held it for her.

"Thank you," she said. "I'll see you later."

"'Bye," Roger said.

A few minutes after Holly left, the phone rang. Roger picked it up. "Hello?"

"So how's your girl this morning?" asked Michael Hudson on the other end of the line.

"A slight headache, but otherwise none the worse for wear," Roger replied. "How's your girl this morning?"

"Battling the hangover from hell and channeling Tallulah Bankhead in the process," Michael said. "But that's typical Donna, and that's why she doesn't get drunk very often. She said she wouldn't have gotten hammered last night if she hadn't been having such a wonderful time that she wasn't paying attention to exactly how much she was drinking." He paused, then said, "Look, Donna doesn't know I'm asking this, and if I'm overstepping here, Fox Head, just say so and I'll drop it, but Donna's never had a female friend in her life, and certainly not one that she thinks as highly of as she already thinks of Holly. She's worried that Holly's going to be angry or embarrassed about last night and never want to speak to her again. I'm the first to admit that Donna can be a bit of a drama queen sometimes, but really, she's got a good heart. She honestly didn't mean to get Holly into any trouble last night. Thank God Josie was the officer who answered the security guard's phone call, and that she sent Ryan to deal with it."

"Holly and I were talking about that just a little while ago," Roger admitted. "Had this happened in Springfield, that wouldn't have been what happened last night, and not only because Holly and I don't have any family on the Springfield police force. And I'm sure Donna does have a good heart. You wouldn't love her so much if she didn't. I can't say for absolute certain, but if I know Holly half as well as I think I do, she's not going to banish Donna to Siberia because of what happened last night. I guess showing up at your office so late was Donna's idea, but Holly said herself that she was just tipsy enough to think it was a good idea and to go along with it. Holly's never had a female friend in all the years I've known her, and she did have a good time last night, she said...at least until the police got involved."

"I can't believe the police had to bring them home," Michael said, laughter in his voice, "even though it was Ryan. Donna thinks the physical feelings of the hangover are awful, she has yet to speak to Victoria."

"Are your daughters going to bust Donna's chops for last night?" Roger asked.

"Marley won't," Michael said certainly, "but Victoria is already busting my chops over it because Donna is still too indisposed to take Vicky's calls herself, and despite my warning her not to go full throttle with this on Donna, she'll do it because that's who she is. What about your daughter?"

"I don't think she's going to find out about this," Roger said. "I'm certainly not going to tell her, and I doubt that Holly will either. If she knew, she'd have a few things to say, but Chrissy's got enough on her plate, with this whole Dinah situation ticking like a time bomb. I just hope Ross doesn't do the stupid thing and push her away."

"It's hell when your daughter suffers heartbreak," Michael agreed. "As a father, your instinct is to rush right in there and fix everything, but when it comes to matters of the heart, you can't fix it. All you can do is be there to dry their tears and listen to them. We all went through the wringer for a couple of years there with Victoria and Ryan, but it finally all worked out. I'll keep a good thought for your daughter and her husband."

"Thanks, Michael."

"Actually, I was calling for another reason. Business related. You said that you used to co-own a TV station with Holly back in Springfield, right?"

"Yes, WSPR."

"Well, I happen to know that there's a TV station here in town that's for sale."

"Is that so?"

"Yup. KBAY. I'm not sure if you're into diversifying your interests, but I remember a little something about how your mind works. I know that you're working with me now, Mr. Vice President of Internet Acquisitions. And I know that Holly is looking for a new job herself."

"Connect the dots," Roger said. He pulled a pen and a pad of paper from the desk drawer. "Tell me more. Who's selling the station?"

"Rachel Cory," Michael replied.

"As in Cory Publishing? Didn't she marry somebody else a few years back?" Roger asked.

"She's divorcing him. A wise move, since the man is a career criminal. He's going to be a special guest of Club Fed for the next twenty-five to life," Michael said.

"That's a tough break for her," Roger said sympathetically.

"Not the toughest one she's ever had in that department," Michael said. "And before you ask how I know all this, she's the mother of one of my sons-in-law and the stepmother to the other, and Ryan's on her side."

"She's Ryan's stepmother?" Roger asked.

"She's the only mother he's ever known, and considering the psychotic nut case his birth mother was, it's a blessing," Michael said.

"Harrison!" Roger exclaimed suddenly. "Is he any relation to the disgraced Senator, Grant Harrison? Another guest of Club Fed?"

"Half-brothers," Michael said, his voice clipped. "And that bastard damn near got Victoria, Ryan, and their son Kirk all three killed, so I'd just as soon not talk about him. He's rotting in prison where he belongs, and has no chance of parole."

"The father's in prison too, isn't he?" Roger asked.

"Spencer Harrison, yes," Michael said.

"So Rachel's divorcing Spencer?" Roger asked.

"No, she's divorcing Ryan's biological father, Carl Hutchins," Michael said. "Spencer is Ryan's stepfather, and the man who raised him, but he always blatantly favored Grant over Ryan because Grant is Spencer's biological son."

Roger whistled low. "No wonder Ryan kept the Harrison name," he remarked. "Okay, so Rachel Cory is selling KBAY. Do you have any other particulars?"

"Not many," Michael said. "Your best bet is to get a meeting with her yourself."

"I think I will," Roger mused. "I'll see when I can get in to meet with her. Thanks for the heads up about KBAY, and don't worry about Donna and Holly. They'll still be friends."

"Anytime, and good to know," Michael replied. He paused, then said, "Uh oh. Tallulah beckons. Gotta run. I'll talk to you later."

"Talk to you later," Roger echoed, then hung up.

He resumed his seat on the couch and leaned back, getting lost in thought. He was beginning to give serious thought to relocating permanently to Bay City once this whole mess with Dinah and Hart was resolved and he was divorced from Dinah. Of course, a lot of that would depend on Holly. Where Holly went, Roger would gladly follow. He knew that for their relationship to have any realistic chance of lasting for the long haul, which is what he wanted more than anything in the world, they could not go back to how things were the last time they were together. Roger had made the mistake of putting Spaulding ahead of Holly back then; actions spoke louder than words, and as much as he had said that she and their relationship were what mattered most to him, his actions had shown the exact opposite, and his actions had caused the breakdown in their relationship that had split them apart. Whether it was luck, serendipity, or the greatest coincidence of all time finding Michael Hudson in Bay City, Roger didn't care. But he knew and trusted Michael, and Michael knew and trusted him. He had a good job with Michael, a chance to make a lot of money legitimately, maybe even buy into the company someday, make it Hudson-Thorpe Enterprises, and he knew that Michael would never cheat him or screw him over, just as he knew that he would never cheat Michael or screw Michael over. The number of people that Roger Thorpe trusted could be counted on one hand, and truthfully he wouldn't even need all five fingers, but Michael Hudson was one of those people. Chrissy was another, but she had her own life and family now, and Roger was happy that his little girl was finally happy, except for the recent strife over Dinah. He was a part of her life, and a part of his grandsons' lives; not as big a part as he would like to be since he was embroiled in this mess with Dinah and Hart, but once that was resolved, he would be a bigger part of their lives. If Roger moved to Bay City, it was only a 35-minute drive from Springfield, close enough for visits that were many and often.

But what about Holly? Would she want to stay in Springfield? The only thing really holding her there was Chrissy and the boys. She was investigating a business opportunity here in Bay City herself. If Roger could get Rachel Cory to sell him KBAY, Holly could manage the station. _Whoa, there, you're getting ahead of yourself,_ he cautioned himself. _You're learning to trust her all over again...but you know damn well that you want to trust her again, with your heart and with your life. You want to marry her someday, if she'll have you. But you can't push her into this. You can offer her the job if you end up owning the station, but you don't want her to think you're dictating to her or telling her what to do._

The first step was a meeting with Rachel Cory, to see if she was even interested in selling him KBAY, if he could even afford it. There was the matter of returning Dinah's trust fund, and he would undoubtedly be hit with a hefty divorce settlement for Dinah when the time came, not that he cared about that; it was only money, he could always make more, and he would pay any amount to legally free himself from Dinah, no matter how much that amount was.

He needed to see if he could afford to buy KBAY, and if Rachel Cory would sell it to him, and in order to do that, he would need to schedule a meeting with her.

Cory Publishing was listed in the phone book. Roger dialed the main number. "Cory Publishing, how may I direct your call?" a man answered.

"Rachel Cory, please," Roger said.

"One moment, please."

A few seconds later, the phone was ringing again. On the second ring, a woman answered, "Rachel Cory's office, how may I help you?"

"I would like to schedule a meeting with Mrs. Cory regarding KBAY," Roger replied, "as soon as possible."

He heard pages being turned and presumed this woman was Rachel Cory's secretary and was looking at her appointment calendar. "I can get you in this afternoon at 4:30," she said.

"That will be fine," Roger said.

"And your name, sir?"

"Roger Thorpe."

"All right, Mr. Thorpe, Mrs. Cory will see you at 4:30 this afternoon."

"Thank you very much," Roger said before hanging up.

Of course, Roger had no way of knowing that Holly's meeting about a new business opportunity was with Rachel, and was about buying KBAY, any more than Holly had any clue that Roger had just scheduled a meeting with Rachel himself, two-and-a-half hours after her own meeting, about buying KBAY.

But before the day was out, Rachel Cory would meet them both separately and be drawn into their lives and their story as Michael and Donna, and Cass and Frankie, were.

Holly, meanwhile, had gotten ready for her meeting and had enough time to pack a few things-not that she was planning on any more nights drinking with Donna Love and getting escorted back to The Bayshore Hotel by Donna's son-in-law the police commissioner-before driving back to Bay City. Roger was spending most of his time there, and would be spending more time there now that he was working with Michael Hudson, and Holly was looking into buying the local TV station so she could manage it. _I practically have one foot out of Springfield already,_ she thought as she drove back to Bay City. _Of course, it's up to Roger. Wherever he goes, I'll go...even if it's back here. _It didn't matter where Roger was-Timbuktu, the dark side of the moon, or anywhere in between, wherever he was, she would go, because she just wanted to be with him. Blake and Kevin and Jason were here in Springfield; so was Hart's son Peter. But Roger and Holly both had a lot of baggage here in Springfield too: the Spauldings, their company, various exes of each of them. Bay City wasn't far. They'd still see Blake and the boys plenty. It's not like Blake was keeping them here. She and Ross had their own life and family. Roger and Holly didn't have to live in Springfield anymore. _Unless Roger really wants to,_ Holly silently amended. _Just take it one step at a time. You're still earning back his trust. If you buy KBAY, you can still live in Springfield and commute. When the time comes, you're going to have to talk this all out with Roger and you're going to have to make the decision on where to live together._

She arrived in Bay City then, and twenty minutes later, she was pulling her car into a spot in the parking garage at Cory Publishing. She had arrived for her meeting with ten minutes to spare.

A brunette woman in her early thirties with green eyes behind wire-rimmed glasses was seated at the receptionist's desk outside Rachel Cory's office. She looked up from her computer and greeted Holly with a smile. "Hi, how may I help you?" she inquired cheerfully.

"My name is Holly Lindsey, I have a 2:00 appointment with Mrs. Cory," Holly replied.

"Yes, Ms. Lindsey," the receptionist said. "Have a seat. Mrs. Cory is out of her office at the moment, but she'll be back shortly."

"Thank you," Holly said, taking a seat and picking up the latest issue of _Brava_ magazine, a Cory publication, from the end table next to her chair.

She was slowly, idly flipping through the magazine when she heard an indignant female voice exclaim, "I am not a child!"

"Well, you're certainly acting one," retorted another, older female voice. "You cannot seriously believe that is proper attire for work, Amanda."

The younger woman, Amanda, a blonde in her early thirties wearing a black leather miniskirt, fishnet stockings, five-inch black heels, and a leopard print blouse, stormed into view before spinning on her heel (Holly wondered how she managed to do that without falling on her butt) and glowering at the woman behind her, a woman with dark brown, shoulder-length hair about Holly's age, who was frowning back at her. "I already told you, I have a date right after work and I don't have time to go home and change!" Amanda exclaimed.

"You couldn't bring that outfit with you and wear something more suitable for the workplace and change before leaving here?" the older woman asked.

"It didn't occur to me," Amanda said snidely.

The older woman released a put-upon sigh. "I'm beginning to think Iris has a point about you."

"Oh, that's terrific, Mom. Take Iris's side over mine. You're my mother, and she hated you from the moment she met you, the entire time you were married to Daddy!" Amanda exclaimed.

"Iris and I have reached a new understanding in the past few years," Amanda's mother replied. "And she has settled down considerably, whereas you-"

"So now I'm the black sheep of the family?" Amanda asked. "That's just great. Thanks a lot, Mom. And you wonder why I don't come home more often!" Amanda then flounced away overdramatically.

Amanda's mother sighed and shook her head. "Whoever said it's supposed to get easier when they're grown was lying," she said aloud to no one in particular. Holly sympathized with the woman on that score; of all the difficulties she and Blake had ever had in their relationship, the worst ones had come once Blake was grown. The woman then addressed the receptionist. "I'll be in my office, Amy. Let me know when my two o'clock gets here."

"She's already here, Mrs. Cory," Amy replied, looking at Holly, and the woman, who Holly now knew was Rachel Cory, followed Amy's gaze to Holly, still seated in her chair and waiting for her meeting.

Rachel reversed course as Holly stood up, and greeted Holly with a warm smile and a firm handshake. "Rachel Cory," she said. "I apologize for that little scene with my daughter. It's a pleasure to meet you."

"Holly Lindsey, it's a pleasure to meet you too, and I have a grown daughter of my own, so believe me, I understand," Holly replied as they shook hands while Amy answered the ringing phone on her desk.

"Mrs. Cory," Amy piped up then, "I'm sorry to interrupt, but there's a problem with the issue of _Brava_ that has just gone to press that requires your immediate assistance." She looked at Rachel and Holly apologetically when they both turned to look at her.

"Where do they need me?" Rachel asked.

"Typesetting," Amy replied.

Rachel nodded. "I'm sorry for the delay," she said to Holly. "Amy will show you in to my office, and you can wait there. I'll be back just as soon as I can." Then Rachel hurried off to fix the problem in typesetting.

"Right this way, Ms. Lindsey," Amy said. She opened the double doors to Rachel's offices, and Holly followed her inside. "Can I get you anything? Coffee, tea, bottled water?" Amy offered.

"No, thank you," Holly replied.

"I'll be right outside if you need anything," Amy said before taking her leave, closing the doors behind her.

Alone in Rachel's spacious office, Holly took a good look around. Several pieces of sculpture were scattered around the office. On the wall above the couch hung a large portrait that had to be of Rachel's family, numbering at least twenty people. Everyone in the portrait, kids and adults, wore white button-down shirts and light blue jeans. Rachel was seated in the middle of the group, with a baby boy about eight months old on her lap. Holly recognized Ryan Harrison in the picture, and when she saw two blonde women who looked identical but for the fact that one wore her hair in a ponytail and the other wore hers long and loose, tumbling just past her shoulders, she realized those women must be Donna and Michael's daughters, Rachel's daughters-in-law. The couch sat in front of a low coffee table, and the conversation group of furniture also included two overstuffed armchairs.

Rachel's desk held several papers and folders, and a grouping of three large, framed photographs that she could see whenever she was seated at her desk. One of the pictures was of Rachel and an older woman Holly guessed was her mother; the second picture was of Rachel surrounded by a group of adults that must have been her children and stepchildren. Ryan was also in that picture, standing behind Rachel's chair with his hands on her shoulders, and he was flanked by a man with black hair about the same age and a man with blond hair about a decade younger. A fortyish man with strawberry blond hair and a warm smile stood next to the man with black hair, one arm slung about the black-haired man's shoulders. Seated next to Rachel was a very pregnant blonde woman in her early thirties, and on Rachel's other side was Amanda, who looked considerably less happy than everyone else in the picture. Seated next to Amanda was a polished blonde woman who looked to be about Rachel's age, with an air of sophistication about her that reminded Holly of Alexandra Spaulding, except that the woman in the photo looked genuinely happy to be there, and not as guarded as Alexandra always looked.

But it was the third picture that really caught Holly's eye. This picture was in the center of the desk, directly at Rachel's line of sight when she was seated in her desk chair, with the picture of Rachel and her mother to its left, and the picture of Rachel and her children and stepchildren to its right. Rachel was in the picture, in a gorgeous white long-sleeved dress covered with silver beads. Silver earrings dangled from her ears, and she looked a few years younger and considerably lighter than she had looked in person just a few moments ago when Holly had formally met her. Her hair was the same length in the picture that it was now, but she had a frizzy, curly perm, which made Holly think the picture was from sometime in the late 1980s, when more women than not had those frizzy curly perms.

But it was the look on Rachel's face, and the man in the picture with her, that made that photograph catch Holly's eye. For in the picture, Rachel wore a beaming smile that seemed lit from within. Her right hand rested, palm flat, on the chest of the tuxedo-clad man standing beside her, right over his heart, and her left arm was stretched across his broad shoulders, her left hand dangling off his left shoulder so that her wedding and engagement rings were visible on her third finger.

The man in the picture cut a dashing figure in his crisp black tuxedo with its perfectly knotted black bow tie, the pristine white of his shirt cuffs, pocket square, and the white cloth of his tuxedo shirt visible offsetting the midnight black of his jacket, shirt studs, and tie. He was a good twenty-five years older than Rachel, his gray hair worn in a brush cut, his darker mustache perfectly trimmed above a dazzling smile of pure happiness. Both of his arms were wrapped around Rachel's waist, his left arm on the outside so that his gold wedding ring, matching the one Rachel wore, was visible on his third finger. They were standing so closely together that their sides were touching. And as a touch of whimsy, a long streamer made of several strands of curled gold ribbon, the sort that you would throw at either a New Year's Eve party or the deck of a departing cruise ship, dangled from the man's left shoulder, standing out in stark contrast against the ebony of his jacket.

_Surely this isn't the man Rachel is now in the process of divorcing,_ Holly thought, because these two people radiated love and happiness in this photograph. Their eyes, their smiles, their body language, the way her hand rested on his heart and her other arm wrapped itself around his shoulders, the way his arms enveloped her in his embrace, firmly, strongly, but not in a stifling or smothering way. No, Rachel was in this man's arms because she wanted to be, because she belonged there, because she loved him with every fiber of her being, and this man was holding Rachel close, one hand familiarly splayed across her lower back, his fingers curving around her hip, because he belonged with her just as surely as she belonged with him, because he loved her with everything in him.

Holly was so caught up in looking at the picture of Rachel and this man that she was jolted from her reverie when the doors opened and Rachel walked in, brushing off her annoyance at whatever the problem she had just dealt with was as if she were shooing away a pesky fly buzzing about her head. "I apologize for your wait," Rachel began. She stopped when she saw Holly standing behind the desk, looking at the photographs. "I see you've met my family," she said proudly. "I have to say, it being just Mom and me for so long, I never thought I'd wind up the matriarch that I am. I didn't become a big sister until I had two children of my own." Rachel walked over to the credenza, the top surface of which Holly noted was completely covered in framed photographs, and plucked one from the front row, handing it to Holly. "You can tell the age difference between Nancy and me right away. We almost look like three generations in this picture, but we're not. I just happen to be almost thirty years older than Nancy." Indeed, the older woman in the picture on Rachel's desk was in this picture, with Rachel beaming on her right, and a pretty blonde girl in her late teens, the aforementioned Nancy, on her left. "And now that Nancy has moved back to Bay City from Arizona, the whole family is together again," Rachel concluded.

"Your mother must be very proud," Holly said as she handed the picture back to Rachel.

"I'm sure she is," Rachel said. Her smile now took on a bittersweet tone. "We lost her three years ago."

"I'm sorry," Holly said, and she genuinely was. Rachel and her mother must have been close, since it was only the two of them for so long.

"Mom didn't raise me or Nancy to feel sorry for ourselves, and the last thing she would want is for us, any of us, including her grandchildren, to waste our lives in mourning," Rachel said. "But I admit, I still often ask myself what Mom would do...whenever I'm not asking myself what Mac would do." A shadow descended in Rachel's eyes now. "I'm glad that Mom was still here and still healthy enough to get me through losing Mac," she said. "I don't think I would have survived it without her, and without my children, and then my stepchildren all either came into my life or came back into my life, and the number of grandchildren grew, and then there's my step-great-granddaughter, but she calls me 'Aunt Rachel.' I never thought that would happen either, considering what Iris and I thought of each other for most of our lives." The shadow left Rachel's eyes now as she went on, "And I doubt I'm through having grandchildren. Ryan really wants at least one little girl, and Matthew doesn't have any children yet, he's my baby. Although some baby, he's 28 years old now. But I'm sure you didn't come here to listen to me brag on my family." Rachel put the picture of herself with her mother and sister back on the credenza and headed over to the couch, where she sat down and kicked off her shoes. Holly followed Rachel to the couch and sat down on the other end of it opposite Rachel, but kept her shoes on. "So, you're interested in buying KBAY," Rachel began as she tucked her feet underneath her, rested her elbow on the top of the couch, and propped her head on her hand.

"Yes, I am," Holly said.

"I **_am _**looking to sell the station," Rachel confirmed. "I'm in the middle of a divorce."

"So am I," Holly admitted.

"Really," Rachel said. "I'm sorry."

"Well, the whole marriage was a mistake, so actually, the divorce is the easy part," Holly reflected.

"I know how that goes," Rachel said. "The marriage I'm ending was a mistake as well. Not the first mistake I've made in that department by any means, but the only times it wasn't a mistake were with Mac. He was my soulmate."

"The one man that you can't live without no matter what, no matter how difficult things ever got, no matter what happened between you in the past, no matter how you hurt each other before," Holly said.

"Exactly," Rachel replied. "Clearly you speak from experience."

"Oh yes," Holly said. "I'm in the process of earning back the trust of my own soulmate. It took me so long to fully realize that he's where I belong, and I had to make several mistakes before I _**did** _realize it, but now I know."

"That sounds familiar," Rachel said.

"Did you ever throw the absolute right man over for the absolute wrong one?" Holly asked, feeling a kinship with Rachel, but in a different way than she had hit it off with Donna the night before.

"Actually, yes," Rachel said, remembering Mac, and Mitch Blake, and what a mess she had made of all of their lives, including her own. After that debacle, she hadn't thought she'd ever be with Mac again, as much as she wanted him back when she finally came to her senses, as her mother Ada had always put it. But Mac had loved her enough to forgive her, and she and Mac had decided not to waste any more time apart when they were always far happier together than they ever were apart or with anyone else.

"Mac?" Holly asked.

"He's the absolute right man I threw over," Rachel said, feeling pinpricks of regret at that lost time all over again.

"But you were able to get back together after that?" Holly asked.

"Yes," Rachel replied. "Of course, I had to literally go blind in order to see what was real."

"I'd prefer not to go that far," Holly remarked dryly, eliciting a laugh from Rachel.

"I was in a car accident," Rachel said after she recovered herself. "I lost my eyesight as a result, and the doctors weren't at all sure it was going to come back. Of course Mac was there, he came to see me in the hospital, and he took care of the kids. But I was so stubborn, too stubborn for my own good, and too proud. We weren't together at the time, but Mac wanted to be there for me, only I didn't want him to see me like that. So I did what I always did in those situations: I got angry. Railed at Mac. Sent him away, banished him from my life. He could be there for Amanda and Matthew, and he was friends with my mother, and he was the father that really raised my oldest son Jamie, who was just starting out on his own by that point, so he could be in Jamie's life and Mom's life and take care of Amanda and Matthew until I could learn to do it on my own without my eyesight, but under no circumstances was he to come anywhere near me.

"And thank God that wonderful, amazing man didn't listen to a word I said. He always knew me better than I knew myself. And the lengths he went to..." She trailed off, a faraway look in her eyes, clearly lost in a happy memory.

Part of Holly hated to ask, but the bigger part of her _**had**_ to ask. "What lengths did Mac go to?"

Rachel had fully been expecting the question, and she found a great deal of comfort in her memories of Mac these days. As great a mistake as she made marrying Carl Hutchins in the first place, the divorce was proceeding fairly smoothly, and Rachel was reclaiming her own life, returning to her artistic roots, spending time with her family. She sensed that Holly Lindsay had a story about her own soulmate that would rival the saga that Rachel and Mac had lived over their quarter century together and apart (and together and apart, and then together until Mac's death parted them), so she didn't mind sharing part of her own story with Holly.

"I had no eyesight whatsoever," Rachel reiterated. "So Mac shaved off his mustache, hired a dialect coach to teach him to speak with a believable British accent, and put a bandage on his index finger to cover a supposed deformity and began volunteering at the hospital as a man named John Caldwell so that he could be with me without my _**knowing**_ he was with me. He did this for months. Everyone else knew that John Caldwell was really Mac-my mother, my son Jamie, my doctors; Amanda and Matthew were still too little to realize what was going on, so all they saw was that their daddy had shaved off the mustache he always wore-but no one told me. In fact, when I interrogated Vivien, our maid, about what John Caldwell looked like after he left the house after one of his visits, Vivien got so desperate and panicked that she described the first man she saw: President Reagan, on the cover of _Time_ on the coffee table." Holly and Rachel both laughed at this.

"You got your eyesight back eventually," Holly said.

"Yes," Rachel said, "thank God. It came back gradually over a period of several hours. I was expecting another visit from John Caldwell, and I had started having feelings for him, which confused me because I was still in love with Mac, but at the time I seriously believed that Mac had removed himself from my life as I had ordered him to do after my accident. John Caldwell seemed to like being around me, and he was always very gentle and caring with me, very solicitous, and a perfect gentleman...which, of course, were all characteristics of Mac's.

"So I was eagerly awaiting John Caldwell's arrival, and then he walked in, and I could see him for the first time in all those months, and it was Mac. It was Mac with a British accent, no mustache, and a bandage on his index finger. And it was in that moment that I realized just how much he loved me, to go that far, to go to all that trouble to be around me after I got mad and threw him out of my hospital room. After everything we had put each other through, and even after I was so proud and stubborn, bordering on arrogance, trying to keep him from seeing me so weak and so...not who I usually was. That's when I finally truly understood that the only thing Mac needed me to be was myself, warts and all. That's who he loved. When I told him I could see him, he was so happy he cried. We both did. He confessed that he was going to have Caldwell go away, and then he was going to come back into my life, but my sight came back before he could send John Caldwell off somewhere. And when I asked him why he did it, he said he did it because he loved me. In fact, he told me that he had realized that he was never going to be over me, and that fact made him happier than anything ever had or ever would."

"That's exactly how I feel about Roger," Holly said.

"It's how I felt about Mac too," Rachel replied. "We got married for the third and final time four months later, and this time our marriage lasted until death did us part."

"That's what I want," Holly confessed. "I want Roger back. I want to be married to him. We have some things to work out yet, and a few outside issues to deal with too, but he's worth it. He's also got a new job of his own here in Bay City, at Hudson Enterprises, and since he'll be spending more of his time here, I want to spend more of my time here as well. I do have experience running a TV station-"

"**That's** it!" Rachel exclaimed, interrupting Holly. "When Cass told me your name, you sounded familiar, but I couldn't think where I knew you from. I didn't actually know you until today, but I remembered the name. You used to run WSPR in Springfield, didn't you?"

"Yes," Holly replied.

"WSPR routinely beat KBAY in the ratings when you were in charge there, as I recall," Rachel said. "Perhaps you can reverse KBAY's ratings fortunes. True, we're a respectable second place, behind WOAK in Oakdale, but KBAY has been a respectable second place for almost fifteen years. My son Matthew was working at KBAY, but he's decided to leave the station and go into the newspaper business."

"That's ironic, I'm leaving the newspaper business to return to television, or at least I hope to," Holly said.

"Well, my stepdaughter Paulina McKinnon works at KBAY, she's a producer on the news, but she's on maternity leave until September," Rachel said.

"Congratulations. Boy or girl?" Holly asked.

"Boy. Thomas Mackenzie McKinnon. They're calling him 'Mack,'" Rachel said proudly. "Anyway, Paulina, being a new mother, didn't want the responsibility of being the station manager. My stepson Sandy used to run the station, but he and his family have been settled in San Francisco for years and have no interest in moving back to Bay City, only visiting for holidays and a week or two in the spring or summer as their schedules permit. And I decided it was time for me to return to my professional roots. I'm a sculptor. I haven't had the time for it in years between KBAY and Cory Publishing. I'll still be a part of Cory Publishing, but my stepdaughter Iris will be taking over as CEO and focusing on the day-to-day running of the company to give me more time for my art, and I really need to get moving on this, because I have a showing in December, so let's get down to brass tacks, Holly."

"All right, Rachel," Holly agreed. Holly named a figure. "Of course, I won't actually have the entire amount of capital until my divorce is final, which should be sometime in late August. At this point, we're just waiting for a date on the docket in Springfield."

"You're very lucky. My divorce isn't going to be final much before November 1," Rachel said.

"Something to be thankful for a few weeks later," Holly pointed out.

"That's true," Rachel replied. "And we always have big Thanksgivings. Given the size of our family, it's impossible not to. Do you have children?"

"A daughter. Blake," Holly replied. "And two grandsons, Kevin and Jason. They were just born four months ago. Fraternal twins. You?"

"Seven grandchildren as I mentioned, more on the way eventually, I'm sure," Rachel replied. "For right now, though, Jamie has two boys, Steven and Christopher. Amanda has a daughter, Allie. Sandy has a daughter and a son, Maggie and Alex. Paulina just gave birth to Mack, and Ryan has Kirk. Biologically, I have two sons, Jamie and Matthew, and a daughter, Amanda. Mac had a daughter, Iris, who used to be my enemy but the nature of our relationship has changed drastically since we lost Mac. I would even call her a friend sometimes. And his son Sandy, I mentioned before, lives in San Francisco with his wife and kids. Then Mac's daughter Paulina found us several months after Mac died. She was raised in an orphanage and foster care, and she missed out on knowing her father, but she's just as much my daughter as Amanda. She's the daughter of my heart. And then there's Ryan, my soon-to-be-ex-husband's son. He didn't grow up with a mother either, and...well, that's a whole other long, unpleasant story, but thankfully we all survived her reign of terror. I know that Ryan sees me as a mother. He's very good friends with both Jamie and Matthew, and he's stepfather to Jamie's oldest son Steven, so I see him as my son. Then Iris has a grown son, Dennis, who has a daughter, Sarah, and there's Iris's husband Hank Kent and stepson Tommy. Or Tom, as he likes to be called now that he's 14. He'll be a freshman in high school in the fall. And then there's Sam and Olivia. Sam is my former son-in-law. He was married to Amanda. The marriage didn't work out, but he's happily married now to Olivia, and they have a son, Brian, and they're raising Sam and Amanda's daughter Allie."

"Wow, that's a really big family," Holly said. "What, do you rent a hall for the holidays?"

Rachel laughed. "No need. Mac and I made sure we had a very big house," she replied. "I spent my whole life looking for the place where I belonged, and I found it with Mac. And now it's my job to give all of our children and grandchildren and great-grandchildren when they come along a place to belong." Rachel sat up now. "Getting back to KBAY, your offer is more than fair. Matthew can stay at the station until you're ready to take over. He's marshaling his own resources to buy into _The Bay City Herald _and needs a bit more time to get his own amount of capital organized. Now, about the station itself..."

They spent the next hour discussing KBAY's viewing area, programming, which shows were syndicated and which shows came from the network affiliate in New York, their ratings, their advertising, and the contract status of their on-air talent on the noon, 6:00, and 10:00 newscasts. Generally speaking, it was old hat to Holly, and she knew that she could do well with and at KBAY, and more than that, that she wanted to do well with and at KBAY. This time, the station would be all hers. Not that she hadn't enjoyed working with Roger at WSPR...some of the time, at least...but he had his Internet acquisitions and big business with Michael. Her having KBAY would be a good complement: something that she was good at and enjoyed and something that was just hers, the way that Roger was good at and enjoyed big business and liked working with Michael.

"So then we have a deal?" Holly asked.

"As I said, your offer is more than fair," Rachel replied. "I accept it. I'll have Cass draw up the necessary papers, and waiting another couple of months won't be a problem for me, or for Matthew. So congratulations, you've got yourself a television station, Holly."

They shook hands again. "Thank you, Rachel," Holly said.

"Thank _**you**_," Rachel corrected. "You taking the station off my hands frees me up to return to my art, which is my great love after Mac and my family." She paused, then said, "Will you be moving to Bay City?"

"That depends on Roger," Holly replied. "The commute from Springfield is doable, and we're not that far yet. But wherever he is, that's where I want to be, and hopefully we will eventually be there, wherever 'there' is, together."

"I was never the one being wooed. It was always Mac. Well, except for the time I saved his life. I realized that his new wife, since we were between marriages at the time, was poisoning him to try and kill him for his money. For all that Iris used to accuse me of being a fortune hunter, I wouldn't have cared if Mac didn't have two dimes to rub together and dug ditches for a living. That was not the case with this other woman, however. When I figured it out, I was frantic. I had to get to him, I had to get him away from Janice, no matter what it took. It was a close thing, it was a very close thing..." She trailed off now, looking troubled. "But I did it. I got to Mac in time. Just. He recovered from being poisoned." Rachel shook her head, banishing the scary and unpleasant memory of Mac nearly dying at the hands of this Janice woman. She looked at Holly and smiled. "Good for you for working to earn your way back into Roger's life. I hope the two of you are able to make it work."

"So am I," Holly said. "For the first time in my life, I know what I want. I'm taking a page from my daughter's book. When she knew what she wanted, she went after it wholeheartedly and sincerely. It worked for her. I'm hoping it works for me."

"Do you think we could introduce my daughter to yours? It sounds like Amanda could learn a thing or two from Blake," Rachel said.

"Oh, Blake wasn't always the way she is now. We had a very rocky relationship for several years, and for several reasons," Holly replied. "When she started to find her way is when our relationship started to improve."

Rachel smiled ruefully. "I guess that's part of the problem. Amanda hasn't found her way yet."

"It took Blake a long time too," Holly sympathized. She stood up, so Rachel did too, after slipping her shoes back on.

"You will keep me posted on how it's going for you and Roger, won't you?" Rachel asked hopefully. "I'd like to know. I'm rooting for the two of you. And if you ever need someone to talk to about the whole situation..."

"I will," Holly replied. "Thank you, Rachel. For everything."

"You're welcome," Rachel said as she walked Holly to the door. "And good luck with Roger."

After Holly left, Rachel decided to run down the street for an iced tea, and she left on the elevator with her receptionist Amy, who had a dental appointment and was leaving early to keep it. While Rachel was gone, Roger arrived for his own meeting with her. Seeing her office doors closed, and no one at the receptionist's desk, he sat down to wait in the reception area, figuring either the receptionist or Rachel Cory herself would show up soon.

Someone did show up, but it was Amanda Cory, and she zeroed in on Roger, sitting there flipping through the same issue of _Brava_ that Holly had flipped through earlier, very much liking what she saw. She was carrying a manila folder with her latest story inside, having just had it rejected by the editor-in-chief, who also happened to be her half-sister Iris Wheeler Kent, and was bringing it to Rachel to complain to her about Iris, but seeing Roger sitting there, Amanda no longer cared about her story, or about complaining about Iris to her mother.

Thinking quickly, she let the folder under her arm fall open and the papers inside scatter all over the floor. "Oops," she said, "how clumsy of me."

Roger glanced up from the issue of _Brava_ he was perusing just in time to get a full-on view of Amanda Cory, age 31, bending low, her leather miniskirt-clad butt sticking up in the air, revealing the hot pink thong she was wearing underneath it. He then returned his attention to the magazine in his hands. He sincerely hoped this woman was not Rachel Cory; it wouldn't be the first time a middle-aged man like Carl Hutchins had married some hot young thing. Whoever she was, she was clearly hot to trot, and more than a little obvious and desperate about it, if the way she was practically shoving her behind in his face was any indication. But Roger was very emphatically not interested. He had had hot young things before: Mindy, Jenna, Dinah. Lookswise, Miss Leather Miniskirt reminded him slightly of Mindy-long blonde hair, blue eyes, clearly into fashion-but she gave off that air of desperation, and in addition, she struck Roger as being nowhere near as bright as Mindy.

It didn't really matter, though. The only woman Roger wanted was Holly. They weren't back together yet, but that's where he wanted to end up, and he wasn't interested in any other woman.

Amanda pouted when she realized she hadn't gotten Roger's attention. "Aren't you going to help me pick up my papers?" she asked as she turned around to face him.

"There aren't that many," Roger said. "I'm sure you can manage." He glanced up again. "You're not Rachel Cory, are you?" he asked, trying not to sound too hopeful.

"God, no," Miss Leather Miniskirt snorted. "I'm her daughter, Amanda."

"Oh, good Lord," came a disgusted voice that reminded Roger far too much of Alexandra Spaulding: that haughty voice that was equal parts honey and cyanide. For one awful split second, he thought it _**was**_ Alexandra, and whipped his head in the direction of the voice. He was flooded with relief when he saw that the owner of the voice was not Alexandra Spaulding, but someone who reminded him quite a bit of her, not only in voice but in looks and bearing as well: she was around Alex's age, with blonde hair, a regal set to the shoulders announcing to all the world that she was clearly to the manor born, and a look of haughty disapproval trained on Amanda Cory with just a bit of an ice queen sneer twisting her mouth. "This is a place of business, Amanda, not a singles bar, although you wouldn't know that by the way you're dressed." She looked at Roger then. "I apologize for my half-sister," she continued. "Amanda thinks she is God's gift to all men. It simply never occurs to her that there might be a man immune to her particular brand of what passes for charm because his interests lie elsewhere."

"I don't see a ring on his finger, Iris," Amanda retorted.

"My interests do lie elsewhere," Roger said then, just to settle the matter once and for all.

"There, you see?" Iris said triumphantly. "You'll have to find another happy home to wreck. What's the matter, dearie, afraid you'll get out of practice while you're off the Continent for the summer?"

"Mom _**asked**_ me to come back for the summer," Amanda reminded Iris through clenched teeth.

"Because you're so busy flitting from man to man all across Europe, you never bother to come home on your own," Iris shot back. "As your latest attempt at an article shows, you're certainly not adding much to the professional atmosphere around here. And you know, I really don't understand where you get this from. Rachel only wrecked one home in her lifetime. But then, Steve Frame couldn't keep his pants zipped when he was around her, so I guess he's really just as much to blame for destroying his relationship with Alice, isn't he?"

"Watch it, Iris, that's my brother's father you're talking about," Amanda warned.

"Oh, please. Daddy was more of a father to Jamie than Steve Frame ever was, and if you asked Jamie, I'm sure he'd tell you the same thing," Iris said. "Of course, I'm closer to Jamie these days than you are since I actually see him on a fairly regular basis."

"Why don't you go soak your head, Iris?" Amanda asked sweetly.

"Why don't you go back to Europe and find a man to jump on, Amanda?" Iris retorted just as sweetly. "Or are you finally going to expand into Asia? There can't be too many men left in Europe with the swath you've cut there these past six years."

Roger was alternately fascinated and uncomfortable by how much Iris and Amanda reminded him of Alexandra and Mindy, but tried to make it appear that he wasn't paying attention to every word they were lobbing at one another in their verbal battle.

"That's enough, both of you," announced a third, much sterner voice then. This one belonged to a woman about Iris's age but with dark hair, who was frowning at both Iris and Amanda and holding a to-go cup of what looked to be iced tea in one hand. _That must be Rachel Cory,_ Roger thought.

The new arrival stood in between Iris and Amanda, who were standing about six feet apart, looking from one woman to the other. "The fact that I was away from my desk for a few minutes and Amy left early for a dental appointment does not mean the two of you can bicker and snipe at each other out here. This is a Fortune 500 company, not a soap opera, and do we really have to have yet another discussion on professional decorum, Amanda?"

"I was just being friendly!" Amanda insisted.

"Your type of friendly requires screening for a social disease," Iris muttered.

"I heard that, Iris!" Amanda said angrily.

"I wanted you to, Amanda!" Iris replied.

"Enough!" the third woman thundered. "Amanda, pick up your papers and go. Iris, don't you have somewhere else to be as well?"

"Actually, yes," Iris admitted. "I have an editorial meeting in ten minutes. Will you be gracing us with your presence, little sister?"

"You can count on it," Amanda said icily.

Iris and Amanda left to prepare for the editorial meeting, still sniping at each other. "The joys of parenthood," the woman said wryly as she watched them go. After Iris and Amanda had disappeared from sight, she turned her full attention to Roger. "I apologize for my daughter and my stepdaughter," she said. "Their behavior was unprofessional, to say the least. In the meantime, I'm Rachel Cory." She extended her hand.

"Roger Thorpe," Roger replied, shaking Rachel's hand. "It's nice to meet you."

"Likewise," Rachel said, even as her internal radar went off. _Roger? Is this Holly's Roger?,_ she wondered. "Shall we adjourn to my office?"

"Fine," Roger agreed. Rachel ushered him into her office, a large room filled with pieces of sculpture and dozens of photographs of what were apparently her very large family. Roger had done a bit of research after Michael's phone call and learned that Rachel had two sons, one daughter, two stepdaughters, and two stepsons, and all of them except her youngest son, Matthew Cory (the same Matthew Cory who had been married, however briefly, to Donna), were married with children and/or stepchildren of their own. She was married to Mackenzie Cory, the founder of Cory Publishing, three times over the course of 25 years, the last marriage taking place in 1983 and lasting until Mac's death of a heart attack in 1989. She had married Carl Hutchins in 1994, and they were in the middle of getting divorced; Carl was bound for a federal penitentiary on various charges ranging from racketeering to attempted murder. Rachel was also a sculptor by trade, had one half-sister, Nancy McGowan, who lived in Bay City and ran a restaurant called The Paradise Café, and her mother Ada Hobson had died in 1993. Her father Gerald Davis had divorced Ada in 1949, leaving her to raise Rachel alone, and was currently finishing up a prison term for perjury.

"So," Rachel said as she seated herself behind her desk, "why did you request this meeting, Mr. Thorpe?"

"Roger, please," Roger said. "I'm working with Michael Hudson now, he's an old friend of mine, and he mentioned to me that you're looking to sell the local TV station you own, KBAY, Mrs. Cory."

_Working with Michael. This IS Holly's Roger!,_ Rachel realized. "Please, call me Rachel," she said. "Well, I _**was**_ looking to sell KBAY, Roger, that's true. But I found a buyer earlier today. The sale won't be final for a few months, but we reached terms just a few hours ago."

"Oh," Roger said, disappointed. "I see."

Rachel studied Roger unobtrusively as he recovered himself from the surprise and disappointment that KBAY had been sold before he even had the chance to make an offer. Yes, she could see Holly and Roger together. "If you're working with Michael, why were you interested in buying KBAY?" she asked. "As an investment opportunity?"

"No," Roger said. "I used to co-own a TV station a few years ago, and I thought this would be an excellent opportunity for my former co-station owner to return to running a TV station. She was the best at it."

"She?" Rachel asked.

"Yeah," Roger replied. "Holly Lindsey." Rachel kept a poker face in the wake of this definite confirmation of what she had already figured out. "You might recommend her to your buyer if he or she is looking for a top-notch station manager."

"You must have been very impressed with her to be recommending her so highly now," Rachel said.

"Oh yes, I'm very impressed with her," Roger said, and that's when Rachel saw it in his eyes: that look, the look she saw in Mac's eyes for so many years, the look others saw in Mac's eyes when he was talking about her, or thinking about her, or watching her from across the room. The look that left no doubt whatsoever that Holly Lindsey was the half that made Roger Thorpe whole. Roger saw Rachel watching him then, and ducked his head, slightly abashed. "Holly isn't just my former co-station owner," he admitted.

"So I see," Rachel replied with an understanding smile. At Roger's puzzled look, she said, "It's in the eyes. They'll give you away every time."

"We're trying to work things out so we can get back together," Roger said, "and I know that she's looking for a new job, something that she really enjoys as opposed to the job she recently left, so I thought..."

"You thought you'd buy KBAY and offer her the station manager's job," Rachel finished. "Well, I'm sorry I can't help you out with that, but it's been my experience that these things have a way of working themselves out, sometimes better than you originally planned."

"Does that mean you'll give her name to your buyer?" Roger inquired.

"I guarantee that the new owner of KBAY will know of Holly's past experience as a station manager," Rachel replied.

"I appreciate that," Roger said. "I won't take up any more of your time." He stood up, so Rachel did too. They shook hands once more. "Thank you for meeting with me."

"You're welcome," Rachel replied. "And good luck with Holly."

"Thank you," Roger said. Then he left.

After Roger departed, Rachel sat down at her desk again and looked first at the picture of herself and her beloved mother, and then at the picture of herself and Mac. "Mac, Mom," she said, addressing the photographs, "I don't know if you have any kind of pull up there, but if you do, put in a good word for Holly and Roger. They deserve another chance."

As Roger was walking down the hall of the seventeenth floor at The Bayshore Hotel after leaving Rachel's office, he was surprised when he saw Holly exiting a suite a few doors down and across from his own. "Holly?" he asked.

Holly looked down the hall and smiled when she saw Roger standing there, his tie loosened, his collar undone, sleeves rolled up, and carrying his jacket over one shoulder. "Hi, neighbor," she said as she walked down the hall to join him.

"Neighbor?" Roger asked.

"Yeah, I checked in a little while ago," she replied. "I have some news. I got a new job today. Well, I don't start for quite a while yet, but I'm going to be working here in Bay City too."

"That's wonderful," Roger said. "What are you going to be doing?"

Holly's smile grew wider. "I bought a TV station," she said. "It'll be a couple of months before everything is finalized and I officially take over as the station manager, but my offer was accepted today."

Roger was thunderstruck. "_**You**_ bought KBAY?" he asked.

"I did," Holly said. Roger started laughing. "Wait," Holly said, "were you going to-"

"I just came from Rachel Cory's office, where she told me she already had a buyer," Roger said.

"Great minds think alike," Holly said.

"I was going to buy it for you to run it," Roger said. "That was probably presumptuous of me."

"Maybe somewhat," Holly agreed, "but I know that you're going to be spending more time in Bay City now that you're working with Michael, and wherever you are, that's where I'm going to be. So I guess I was somewhat presumptuous too."

"Do you want to move to Bay City permanently?" Roger asked.

"Do you?" Holly countered.

"That depends on what happens with us," Roger said.

"Yes, it does," Holly agreed.

"We have a lot of other things to settle before we get to where we're going to be living," Roger said.

"We do," Holly said, nodding.

"But that's definitely a subject we need to revisit at a later date, because where we live is a decision that we're going to have to make together."

Holly's heart turned over in her chest. Roger was talking about making a decision _**together**_ about where they would live. At a later date, sometime in the future, but this was the biggest step he had taken so far towards the possibility of them having a future together.

"Yes, it is," she said, her smile taking over her entire face.

Roger's answering smile was a beacon of hope.

They were slowly making progress, slowly growing closer, and that was all that mattered.

* * *

_**Beverlee McKinsey, who originated the role of Alexandra Spaulding on GL in 1984, originated the role of Iris Cory Wheeler on AW in 1975. I am more familiar with her successor in the role of Iris, Carmen Duncan, but when I realized that Roger would be seeing Iris and Amanda argue at Cory Publishing, I could only see Beverlee as Iris...hence Roger being reminded of Alexandra when he saw and heard Iris and thinking, for one split second, that it actually was Alex.**_


	10. An Eventful Date Night

"I think this one," Donna said decisively.

"Black? Really?" Holly asked, surprised.

"Black does not automatically mean 'slutty,'" Donna replied. "White is for virginal ingénues, I don't do pastels, and I already have several pieces of lingerie in red. The purple makes me look hippy, the green makes me look poochy, and I'm not much for blue. That leaves black. Besides, Michael will like it...for the 30 seconds or so I'm wearing it." She grinned mischievously. "And it _**is**_ his birthday."

"Black it is, then," Holly agreed.

As Donna pulled the black negligee from the rack and checked the size tag, she asked Holly, "So, when are we going to buy something like this for you?"

"Oh, not for quite some time yet," Holly said with a laugh.

"Really?" Donna asked, surprised.

"You don't have to sound so surprised," Holly said. "At the moment, sex would just complicate things for Roger and me."

"Yes, I guess that's true," Donna reflected. "It certainly complicated things for Michael and me the first time we...well...got together after Michael moved back here. Still, it has to be frustrating for you."

"Celibacy is not a new concept in my life," Holly replied. "Let's just say my fantasy life is very healthy and active these days and leave it at that."

"Ryan and Jamie both belong to this fantasy football league thing on the computer," Donna said.

"Okay, I don't know much about football, but I really doubt it's the same thing," Holly said dryly.

Donna laughed. "Of course not. You're not fantasizing about a football team. You're fantasizing about Roger."

"Boy, am I," Holly muttered.

"Oh ho, then you _**are**_ frustrated," Donna said.

"A little," Holly admitted. "But I'm not going to do anything to risk ruining our chances for a happy future together. It will happen when it's right for both of us." They were interrupted by a muffled ringing sound.

"Your purse is ringing," Donna said.

"Cellular phone," Holly replied, removing the phone from her purse and answering it. "Hello?"

"Hello," Roger greeted her on the other end of the line.

"Well, hi there," Holly said happily.

Donna, realizing it was Roger by the tone of Holly's voice and the way her eyes lit up and a soft smile bloomed on her face, discreetly stepped away to give her friend some privacy.

"We're still subscribing to the wooing each other theory, right?" Roger asked.

"Right," Holly replied.

"I just wanted to make sure," Roger said. "To that end, there's an art exhibit tonight at the local museum. Would you like to go?"

"Are you asking me on a date?" Holly asked.

"Yes. Yes, I am," Roger replied. "We can get dinner before or after, whatever you want."

"I would love to go to the art exhibit with you," Holly replied.

"Great," Roger said, and she could hear the smile in his voice. "I'll pick you up at 7:30. Are you at The Bayshore or at home?"

"The Bayshore," Holly said.

"Okay, then I'll pick you up at your room tonight at 7:30."

"I'll be waiting."

After they said goodbye, Donna returned, her purchase in a pink-and-white-striped shopping bag. "That was obviously good news," she greeted Holly.

"I have a date with Roger tonight," Holly said happily.

"He asked you?" Donna asked excitedly.

"Yes!" Holly exclaimed.

If the few people in the lingerie shop thought the two middle-aged women acting like giddy teenage girls who had just been asked to the prom by the boys they had had huge crushes on all year was odd, they kept their comments and thoughts to themselves. "And you're absolutely sure you won't be needing anything from here?" Donna asked, gesturing at the store around them with both arms.

"Positive," Holly said firmly.

"All right," Donna said, lowering her arms. "But you'll need a sensational outfit for tonight, something to knock his socks off. What are you doing? Did he tell you?"

"Dinner and an art exhibit," Holly replied as they left the lingerie shop.

Donna scanned the shop windows across the way with an appraising eye. "Hmm..." she said thoughtfully.

Holly followed Donna's gaze and was surprised when she spotted Rachel Cory exiting one of the stores carrying a garment bag. Rachel spotted Holly with Donna and lifted a hand in greeting as she crossed the concourse. Holly waved back. "Why are you flagging Rachel down?" Donna asked.

"She's a friend of mine," Holly replied. "I bought KBAY from her last week."

"You bought KBAY? Why didn't you tell me?" Donna asked, shocked.

"Because you've been planning a celebration to rival Mardi Gras for Michael's birthday, and Roger and I have both been pulled into it to try and keep Michael from finding out, and I realize I don't know Michael that well yet, but if he's anything like Roger, he at least knows you're up to something, even if he doesn't know exactly what it is."

"Well, of course he knows we're doing something for his birthday," Donna replied. "He just doesn't know exactly what. And if he has somehow figured it out..." Her eyes narrowed slightly.

"Roger wouldn't tell him," Holly declared loyally.

"Of course he wouldn't, because Roger doesn't know everything," Donna said. "But if Michael has somehow figured out exactly what I have planned for tonight, he'll fake that he doesn't. But that's the things he'll fake tonight, especially once I get him alone." She grinned saucily.

Rachel arrived then. "Hello, Holly," she said. Then she nodded at Donna. "Donna."

"Rachel," Donna said shortly.

Holly looked from Donna to Rachel, back to Donna, then back to Rachel. Deciding not to get involved in whatever this was, she greeted Rachel warmly. "Hello, Rachel. I was just helping Donna with some shopping. It's Michael's birthday."

"Ah, yes, Jamie and Ryan both mentioned that recently," Rachel replied. "I just picked up my dress for tonight's art exhibit."

"You're going to the art exhibit tonight?" Holly asked. "I am too."

"With Roger?" Rachel asked interestedly.

"Yes," Holly said happily. "He asked me."

Rachel beamed. "That's wonderful!" she exclaimed.

"Yes, isn't it?" Donna inquired. "We were just on our way to find Holly an outfit for tonight. We don't want to keep you, Rachel, busy as you are."

"Actually, I'm not as busy as you, Donna," Rachel replied sweetly. "After all, you own and run The Harbor Club. I sold KBAY to Holly, Matthew is running things over there until the sale is final and Holly can take over, and Iris is handling the day-to-day operations at Cory Publishing, so my schedule is wide open for today. I'd love to help you find something for tonight, Holly."

Donna bristled slightly, but before Holly could figure out what to say, Donna said, "That's just fine." Then she pinned Rachel with a hard stare. "And for your information, The Harbor Club is not open for breakfast, and I took the whole day and night off today because it is Michael's birthday."

Now, Holly had borne witness to more than one fight Roger had had with Ed Bauer over her years and years ago, but being fought over by two of her female contemporaries, both of whom she considered friends, was a new experience for Holly. She didn't think that Donna and Rachel would come to blows over her as Roger and Ed had once upon a time, but still, the best course of action Holly could see was finding an outfit quickly so the three of them could go their separate ways. "Is this black tie? I forgot to ask Roger," Holly said.

"No, it's not black tie," Rachel replied as she, Holly, and Donna crossed the concourse toward the womens' apparel shops. "You could wear a skirt and blouse, if you wanted, or a nice summery casual dress."

"No, no, no, she wants some slinky, sexy number to make Roger's eyes pop out of his head," Donna disagreed.

"Um, actually-" Holly began.

Rachel sighed. "It's like talking to Amanda," she said. "You know, Donna, some women prefer_** not** _to dress as walking advertisements for sex."

"Are you comparing me to your prodigal strumpet of a daughter?" Donna asked, insulted.

"If the shoe fits," Rachel said. "And do not call Amanda a strumpet."

"'Strumpet' is the polite term for Amanda," Donna sniffed.

Rachel ignored Donna and turned her attention to Holly. "What do you have in mind?"

"I would rather not do slinky or sexy just yet," Holly replied with a half-apologetic look at Donna.

"Of course," Rachel said with a sage nod. "There's no rush."

"There may not be any rush, but I'm sure Holly would like to get there eventually," Donna muttered.

"Oh? The way you got there with Michael the night before you married my son?" Rachel challenged.

This was news to Holly, but she carefully schooled her features not to show her shock. "I regret hurting Matthew. How many times do I have to say it?" Donna wanted to know as Holly realized that the younger man Donna had married was one of Rachel's sons.

"Oh really," Rachel said. "I'm supposed to believe that when you had no trouble at all using him to make Michael jealous?"

"My entire relationship with Matthew was not about making Michael jealous," Donna said in a low, firm voice.

"I suppose not. Just the part where you slept with Michael the night before marrying Matthew, and then when Michael didn't propose to you the morning after, you rushed to marry Matthew," Rachel retorted.

"Oh, like you never made a mistake and married the wrong man?" Donna demanded. "Two words, Rachel: Carl Hutchins."

"I believe you made that particular mistake before I did," Rachel replied haughtily.

"Well, at least I never professed to love Carl," Donna said primly. "It was a marriage of convenience, period. And you have a lot of room to talk to me about cheating. How many times did you cheat on Mac? There was Steve Frame, although I suppose I can understand that, given your history and, of course, your deep-seated need to once again stick it to Alice Matthews after Steve miraculously returned from the dead with plastic surgery after seven years.

"And then there was Mitch Blake. He was shacking up with Janice Frame, Janice married Mac for his money and almost poisoned him to death while keeping Mitch on the side, and you valiantly threw yourself on Mitch's penis so you could find out where Janice had taken Mac to finish him off...only it didn't end there. Afterwards, you decided to keep seeing Mitch on the side yourself, to the point that Mac divorced you when he found out that the baby you were carrying was Mitch's and not his. And then, of course, when Mitch returned from prison years later, you almost fell into bed with him again, and everyone in town could see how he fawned all over you after Mac's passing, neglecting his own wife, who just happened to be your best friend Felicia, to hold your hand and try to get back into your pants again."

"You weren't even living here when that whole mess with Janice happened, you don't know anything about it, and how _**dare**_ you make it sound so tawdry. And yes, Mitch was there for me after Mac died, but only as a friend. He wanted more, but I didn't, and he and Felicia were already having problems that had nothing whatsoever to do with me by then. But if you insist on discussing past relationship peccadilloes, I would like to point out that unlike you, **I** have never slept with a man _**after**_ he married one of my daughters _**and**_ had a sexual relationship with the other," Rachel shot back angrily.

"Oh, look, that's nice," Holly blurted, and Rachel and Donna stopped arguing long enough to look in the shop window that Holly was looking in, at the black dress on the mannequin in the window.

"If you're going to a funeral," Donna said with a distasteful twist of her mouth. "All that's missing is a veil."

"That's a very somber dress," Rachel added. "It's nice, but...well...is that the kind of statement you want to make?"

"No," Holly agreed, relieved that Rachel and Donna had stopped bickering. "I definitely want something more colorful."

"Then that's what we'll find," Donna pledged.

The next forty-five minutes were comprised of several argumentative comments between Donna and Rachel while Holly tried on dress after dress.

"She looks like a rainbow exploded," Rachel said when Holly emerged from the dressing room wearing a dress of red, yellow, green, blue, and white vertical stripes that Donna had suggested she try on.

"It's a date, not an audition for the community playhouse's production of _Godspell_," Donna said when Holly had tried on Rachel's choice, a maroon ankle-length dress with cap sleeves and a white lace collar that Holly had been trying to diplomatically find a way to tell Rachel she would not be caught dead in.

Finally, Holly found a summer dress in a deep gold, with a matching belt at the waist, spaghetti straps, and the skirt of which hit just below her knees. Relieved, she tried it on, decided she would take that dress no matter what Rachel and Donna thought, and when they saw her in it just outside the dressing room, they stopped sniping at one another over dresses and actually agreed that it was the ideal dress for Holly.

Rachel took her leave after the dress had been paid for and zipped into a garment bag. When it was just Holly and Donna again, Donna began somewhat haltingly, "I used to work with Matthew at KBAY. He's the ex I worked with awkwardly for awhile after we broke up."

Holly nodded. "I get it," she said.

"Get what?" Donna wanted to know.

"I get why you and Rachel don't really get along," Holly said.

"We're usually not that bad," Donna said sheepishly. "But without Jamie and Ryan here, or the grandchildren..."

"Plus you were jealous," Holly said knowingly. Donna looked even more sheepish now. "I've never had one good female friend in my adult life, let alone two, but it's not a contest. There's room in my life for both you _**and**_ Rachel. Although I think from now on, I'll keep the two of you apart."

"That would probably be best," Donna agreed, more relieved that Holly isn't angry at her than anything else. "I've never had a good female friend in my entire life, so I'm still feeling my way with this whole friendship thing," she admitted. "But I'll get better, I promise. The important thing here is that you got a fantastic dress for tonight."

"Yeah, I did," Holly agreed, adjusting the garment bag since her fingers were turning white.

"It was inevitable that Michael and I...well, that what happened the night before I married Matthew happened," Donna went on. "We had been circling each other for several months by then, and I admit, it was not a planned seduction, but I did seek him out hoping that, since that was his last chance, so to speak, he would do something, say something, to let me know that he still loved me as I still loved him. I really admire you for having the strength and the intelligence to wait until you're both ready and you're both absolutely sure that you're going to be together, and not just for that one night."

"Well, we've made that mistake before," Holly admitted. "It's not a mistake I want to make again. I want to marry Roger someday."

Donna goggled. "After everything that's happened, you actually want to marry him?" she asked, surprised.

"Very much," Holly replied with absolute certainty.

"Why?" Donna asked. "Not that I'm against marriage," she added hastily, "but as a five-time loser in that department myself, three of those with Michael, I figure that the head of the aisle about to march down it again is the last place I'll ever find myself again."

"How do I explain it?" Holly asked rhetorically. She thought for several seconds as she framed her response in her head. "I'm already fully committed to Roger. He's not there yet, and that's okay. But when he is, I want to stand beside him in front of a minister or a judge and vow to him that I'm going to be by his side for the rest of our lives. I want to join my life to his. I want to be his wife, I want him to know that I'll belong to him and he will belong to me forever, no doubts, no fears that I'm going to leave him again or change my mind. I want him to know without question that I want him, I _**choose** _him and only him, for all eternity. And I want the world to know it too, but it's more important that Roger knows it."

Months from now, Donna would look back on this conversation, this moment, and fully realize the profound effect it had had on her. But in that moment, all she said was, "Wow. That's very deep."

"I've spent a lifetime ignoring and denying and trying to push aside or get over what I feel for Roger," Holly continued. "I've finally come to know that that is never going to happen, and more than that, I would never want it to. We've lost and wasted enough time. I don't want to lose or waste one more second. And no matter how long it takes...no matter how much time Roger needs...whatever I need to do to earn back his trust and make him see, make him know without any doubts or questions that I'm going to be with him from now on...it's all right, because he's worth it. _**We** _are worth it. And I've never wanted anything in my life more than I want a life and a marriage with him, only this time, it's going to last forever." She looked at Donna sharply. "And you are not to breathe one word of this to Michael or anyone else. I was always so skittish about marriage in the past. I'm not anymore, obviously, but Roger doesn't know that yet, and I don't want to scare him or send him running. We're a long, _**long**_ way away from being ready to get married. When the time is right, I'll broach the subject with him, but to do it now would be relationship suicide, and there's no way I'm going to do anything to mess things up."

"My lips are sealed," Donna said. "They could cut off my arms and legs and throw me off a cliff and I wouldn't say one word, not one syllable."

"I don't think anyone will be trying to do that to you, but thank you, I appreciate you keeping this quiet," Holly said.

"That's what a good friend does," Donna said with a proud smile.

At 7:30 on the dot that evening, Roger was knocking on the door of Holly's suite at The Bayshore. In the few seconds before she opened the door, he thought back to another night long ago when he had knocked on the door of her hotel suite in Acapulco. _How far we've come since then,_ he thought. _And the distance we have to go feels like it's getting smaller every day. _

She opened the door and greeted him with a radiant smile that stole his breath. The joy and love shining in her eyes, and the dress of deep gold that she wore, made her shine brighter than the sun. "Hi," she said.

"Hello," he replied, wondering if she noticed that he sounded breathless when he uttered that one-word greeting.

Of course she noticed. But the sight of Roger standing at her door in a light gray poplin suit with a navy blue tie with a pattern of little white diamonds on it with his hands behind his back, staring at her with open admiration and adoration both gleaming in his eyes, left her a bit breathless as well.

They stood there gazing at each other for a long moment in silence before Roger spoke. "You look lovely," he said.

"Thank you. You're looking very handsome yourself," she replied.

Roger brought his hands out from behind his back, revealing a small box containing an orchid corsage. "I know it's not a prom or the 1950s, but, well..." He trailed off. He had agonized over several different kinds of bouquets, flustering and exasperating three different employees at the florist two blocks from The Bayshore, until finally in desperation the one of those three that hadn't escaped to the back to either scream in frustration or curse him behind his back had suggested a corsage, and he had latched on to that, becoming increasingly sold on the idea when she had explained the meanings of the three different color orchids in the particular corsage he was now holding in his hand.

Roger opened the lid of the box and Holly saw that the corsage contained three different colors of orchids: white, yellow, and lavender. "It's beautiful," Holly said softly. Seeing that it was a wrist corsage, she held up her right hand. "Would you put it on for me?"

"Sure," Roger said, removing the corsage from the box and carefully, gently slipping it onto Holly's wrist, feeling the electricity when his fingers brushed her skin in the process, and knowing by the quick, sharp inhalation of breath she took that she felt it too. "The florist said that the white orchids symbolize beauty and elegance, the yellow symbolizes friendship and new beginnings, and the lavender symbolizes grace, elegance, and feminine beauty. So I guess the meanings of the white and the lavender overlap somewhat, but you _**are**_ elegant, and very beautiful, so it's fitting."

"It's wonderful, and I love it. Thank you," she said. After making sure she had her room key, she pulled the door closed and locked it behind her. "So, dinner first or the art exhibit?"

"I leave that up to you," Roger replied. "Frankie and Cass recommended a place, TOPS. We haven't been there yet, so I thought we'd give it a try."

"Sounds great," Holly said with a smile. "I'm not really hungry yet, though, so how about we go to the art exhibit first, and then head to TOPS for dinner afterward?"

"All right," Roger replied. "So, how was your day?"

"Interesting," Holly said. "I went shopping with Donna, and we ran into Rachel Cory. She's going to the art exhibit tonight too. Rachel, not Donna."

"No, I wouldn't guess Donna would be there, since it's Michael's birthday," Roger replied. He held the car door for her and once they were on their way to the art exhibit, Holly continued her story.

"Anyway, it turns out that Rachel and Donna don't really like each other," Holly continued. "So I'm standing in the middle of The Galleria concourse, listening to them argue about Donna having married Rachel's son Matthew to make Michael jealous, and then they were insulting each other about past indiscretions each of them had made. Apparently they both married Carl Hutchins, and...well, both of those marriages were a big mess. Without going into any of the sordid details, I had my work cut out for me getting them to stop sniping at each other long enough to help me find a dress for tonight. I'm still amazed they agreed with me on this one."

"They reminded you of Ed and me, didn't they?" Roger asked knowingly.

"No punches were thrown, nobody got any hair yanked out or eyes scratched out, but yes, they did sort of remind me of you and Ed fighting over me a million years ago," Holly admitted.

"Well, if Donna Love and Rachel Cory started catfighting in the middle of The Galleria concourse, you could charge admission and make a bundle," Roger joked.

"Yeah, but then the police would have to come and break it up, and Donna is Ryan's mother-in-law, and Rachel is Ryan's stepmother, and that would just be unpleasant for everybody," Holly replied. "It was new, though, having the two of them fighting like that. Donna admitted after Rachel left that part of the reason she started in on Rachel was that she was jealous."

"Donna is a force of nature," Roger said. "Rachel strikes me as much more reformed. She may have had wild ways and wild days, but those are far behind her. They probably automatically clash because of the difference in their personalities, and then when you add in the fact that Donna was jealous of Rachel for being your friend, and Rachel was probably also jealous of Donna being your friend, it's no wonder they started sniping at each other."

"I guess. I'm kind of out of my element here," Holly admitted. "I've never had close female friends my own age before. But there's room for both of them in my life. I'll just have to do a better job of keeping them separate from each other from now on."

"That sounds like a wise idea," Roger said.

"How was your day?" Holly asked.

"Boring compared to yours," Roger replied. "I heard from Frankie today. She doesn't have anything yet on Dinah and Hart trying to gaslight me."

"She'll get it," Holly said confidently. "These things take time."

Roger glanced over at Holly. "You're so sure," he said.

"I am," Holly said with a nod.

"How?" Roger asked, looking back at the road. "How are you so sure?"

"I'm with you on this gorgeous summer night," Holly said, "and we're getting closer every day. We're going to get it right this time. I know we are. I believe that with everything in me. So yes, Frankie will get the proof of what Dinah and Hart are doing. My divorce is waiting to be heard. Once we have the proof of what Dinah and Hart have really been trying to do to you, you'll get your divorce. No one is trying to come between us. Neither one of us wants anyone else. And for the first time in our lives, we have no secrets from each other. We're on our way, Roger. We'll get there."

They had reached the museum by now, and Roger parked the car and turned it off. He turned to look at Holly in the fading light and said, "I'm starting to believe we will, Holly."

Holly blinked rapidly when she felt a sheen of moisture welling up in her eyes. She reached across the console for Roger's hand, and when he took hold of her hand, he bent his head to kiss the back of her hand. She swallowed the lump in her throat and said, "Let's go look at some art."

"Yes, let's," Roger agreed.

They walked into the museum arm in arm, smiling at each other. Rachel spotted them and smiled when she saw them together.

"What are you smiling at?" Amanda Cory asked her mother.

Startled, Rachel turned to look at her daughter, who was clad in a tight red halter dress with a short, flared skirt that left absolutely nothing to the imagination. "What are you doing here?" she asked.

"It's a free country," Amanda retorted, taking a sip from the champagne glass in her hand. "Besides, everybody else is busy, and I'm sick of hearing about Dennis and Kelsey's wedding."

"It's in two months, and you know Iris well enough to know that she'll make her only son's wedding a big production," Rachel replied.

"Yeah, a big production that includes most of the family. Paulina's not going to be in it, but only because she practically just had a baby. Jamie and Matthew are standing up with Dennis, Ryan is giving the bride away, Vicky is the matron of honor-"

"Kelsey is Ryan's cousin, and her father is deceased, so of course Ryan and Vicky are going to be in the wedding. And Jamie and Dennis have been best friends since they were twelve years old, or have you forgotten that's how your father and I met, through Jamie and Dennis when I went to pick Jamie up at Mac's house when he went swimming there with Dennis that day?" Rachel interrupted her.

"I'm just curious, do you give Matt this much grief? Because he's divorced too, you know," Amanda reminded Rachel.

"I have no reason to question Matthew's behavior or choices," Rachel pointed out, "whereas you give me ample reason to question both your behavior and your choices on a daily basis."

"Whatever," Amanda said dismissively. "You didn't answer my original question: what are you smiling at?" Amanda followed her mother's gaze, and Rachel saw the predatory gleam come into Amanda's eyes when she spotted Roger Thorpe, completely ignoring the fact that Holly was on his arm, their heads bent together as they laughed at something.

"Amanda," Rachel said sternly. "Your father and grandmother and I did not raise you to be a homewrecker."

"Well, I'm guessing Grandma didn't raise you to be a homewrecker either, but you had no qualms about breaking up Steve Frame's engagement to Alice Matthews because you wanted him for yourself," Amanda retorted.

"Yes, I broke up Steve and Alice. But first of all, I was a lot younger than you are, secondly, I'm not proud of my behavior now, and lastly, we're not talking about me, we're talking about you," Rachel replied. "Roger and Holly are working through some things. He is not available, Amanda."

"He's not married. He's not even engaged like Steve was when you went after him," Amanda said.

"Amanda," Rachel said warningly.

"Mom, relax," Amanda chided. "You may have sworn off men and sex now that you've finally seen the light and are divorcing Carl, but I'm still young, and I have needs."

Rachel shook her head in bewilderment. "Maybe you're not ashamed of your behavior, but you know damned well that your father would be, and so would your grandmother, and I certainly am."

Amanda looked at Rachel defiantly. "Yes, I know, I'm such a disappointment. I'm not like Paulina. I'm not even like Iris. And I'm not like any of your precious daughters-in-law, although it boggles the mind how you couldn't stand it when Vicky was married to Jamie, and when Blaine was married to Jamie before that, but you love Vicky now that she's married to Ryan, and you adore Blaine ever since she got together with Sandy, to the point that you and Daddy shared your last wedding day with Sandy and Blaine."

"All I've ever wanted is for my kids...all of my kids, and yes, that includes Paulina and Sandy and Ryan...to be happy and healthy, and they all are except you. Jamie was not happy with Vicky, or with Blaine. Ryan _**is**_ happy with Vicky, and Sandy is happy with Blaine."

"Well, that shows what you know, because I am very happy with my life," Amanda said, her chin jutting out.

"No, you're not," Rachel said sadly. "You weren't happy with Sam, and I didn't want you to stay with him if you weren't happy. But you're not any happier now than you were when you divorced Sam and gave him custody of Allie and went off to Europe to find yourself."

"That's Iris talking, or Vicky," Amanda said angrily. "All Amanda found was her way into half the bedrooms in Europe. Don't even try to deny they've said it. I know they have."

Rachel sighed. "Amanda, leave Roger alone," she ordered.

"I can't do that, Mom, because I want him, and I'm going to do everything I can to have him. I don't want to marry the guy, I just want to have some fun," Amanda said. Then she walked off, leaving Rachel looking heavenward in exasperation, silently apologizing to Holly and Roger, then giving Amanda several seconds' head start before following after her at a discreet distance.

Roger and Holly were strolling through the museum, still arm in arm, taking in the paintings, all of which were by American Impressionists. Amanda followed after them, plotting how to make a move on Roger. The first step was getting the woman on his arm out of the vicinity.

Roger and Holly stopped in front of a painting of a woman in a long black dress and a black hat. "Lilla Cabot Perry, _The Black Hat_, 1914," Holly read aloud from the plaque beneath the painting.

"Victorian era?" Roger asked.

"Not quite," Holly replied. She leaned in closer and said, "We've acquired a shadow. Or I should say, you've acquired one."

Roger looked at her, puzzled. "A shadow?" he asked.

"Amanda Cory is following us," Holly whispered. "And looking at you like a starving man eyes a seven-course meal."

Roger made a face. "That girl does not know how take a hint," he said distastefully.

"You've met her before?" Holly asked, surprised.

"Technically," Roger replied as they moved on, Amanda still trailing after them. "I was waiting for my meeting with Rachel Cory outside her office, and Amanda tried desperately to get my attention. I told her point blank that my interests lie elsewhere, but she obviously didn't get the message." He looked Holly in the eye, and she saw the urgency and pleading in his gaze. "You know that I did nothing to encourage her, right?" he said. "I'm not interested in her. I'm not interested in anyone but you."

"I know," Holly assured him, squeezing his arm reassuringly.

"She can clearly see that I'm with you," Roger went on. "How does that go over her head?"

"I don't think it's a matter of going over her head, I think it's a matter of she just doesn't care," Holly replied. "Do you want to get out of here?"

"Let that little hussy chase us out of here? No," Roger said. "No, we're staying."

When they did leave after looking at all the paintings, though, Amanda followed them to TOPS, and Rachel followed Amanda.

Roger and Holly both found TOPS greatly reminiscent of The Towers Club in Springfield. They had to take an elevator to the restaurant, which occupied the whole top floor of a building in downtown Bay City, and the place had a balcony that overlooked downtown, just as The Towers Club had. TOPS was slightly smaller than The Towers Club, though. There was a brief wait for a table. "I'm going to powder my nose," Holly said after the maître d' had informed them of this fact.

"Meet me on the balcony when you're done?" Roger suggested.

"Yes," Holly agreed with a smile. "Excuse me."

Roger headed out to the balcony, enjoying the fact that, unlike at The Towers Club, no one inside TOPS was staring at him, casting judgmental or disapproving looks at him and Holly for being there. All right, sure, he deserved those judgmental and disapproving looks in Springfield, but here in Bay City, it really was a whole new fresh start. When people here looked at him and Holly, all they saw was a man and a woman. It was a new, and very pleasant, experience, and although they hadn't discussed it yet, Roger was sure that Holly noticed and enjoyed this fact as much as he did.

"Well, hello," purred a seductive female voice not belonging to Holly.

_Of course, there's no such thing as the perfect place_, Roger thought ruefully as he looked over his shoulder to find Amanda Cory standing there, one hand on her hip, one ankle crossed over the other, giving him what she obviously thought was a 'come hither' look. Inwardly sighing, he moved to the far end of the balcony, where he stood with his back to the doors leading back into the restaurant and folded his arms tightly across his chest.

Meanwhile, when Holly emerged from the ladies' room, she found a worried-looking Rachel waiting in the hall outside the restrooms for her. "Rachel?" she asked.

"I'm so sorry, Holly," Rachel said.

"For what?" Holly asked, confused.

"My daughter," Rachel said in a tone that mixed anger and regret. "She has set her cap for Roger, and she followed the two of you here, so I followed her here. I haven't seen Amanda yet, but I know she's here. I saw her get on the elevator, and she took it straight up here, and there's nothing else on this floor but TOPS. I take it she wasn't in the ladies' room?"

"No," Holly replied.

"Where is Roger?" Rachel asked.

"Waiting for me on the balcony," Holly said. "You don't think-"

"Oh, yes, I do," Rachel replied grimly. "Come on." They hurried through the restaurant proper and toward the balcony, Rachel in the lead. She stopped so suddenly that Holly bumped into her back. When Holly stepped to Rachel's side, she saw Roger with his back to the doors that lead back into the restaurant, his posture stiff, his body language screaming that he is deeply uncomfortable, while the blithely oblivious Amanda Cory half-stalked, half-strutted across the balcony toward him until she invaded his personal space.

"Why are you being like that?" Amanda asked, the exaggerated pout on her face clearly evident in her voice as she brushed up against Roger, walking two fingers across his shoulder blades. Roger jerked away from her as if he'd been burned, taking long, backward strides so he could keep his eyes on her. Holly could tell that his arms were folded tightly across his chest. "I don't bite," Amanda continued as she against half-stalked and half-strutted towards him. "Well, unless you want me to."

"I'm with someone," Roger insisted firmly.

"She never has to know," Amanda replied.

"No, I don't just mean I'm with someone tonight. I mean I'm **with someone**," he continued, emphasizing the last two words.

"So you're with someone," Amanda said, waving a hand dismissively. "I'm not looking for a commitment. I don't want to screw up your relationship, I just want to screw you." She gave him what he guessed was supposed to be a saucy smile, but he didn't find it the least bit appealing in any way.

Roger was appalled at how crass this girl was being. Amanda Cory, despite her pedigree, was completely devoid of the least little vestige of class. "What do I have to do to get you to take 'no' for an answer?" he asked tightly.

"I have an uncanny knack for turning 'no's into 'yes's," Amanda said, reaching behind herself to untie the halter holding up the top of her dress.

"What are you doing?" Roger asked, alarmed. He slammed his eyes shut, then tipped his head back to stare straight up into the black night sky.

"Oh, come on, Roger, you know you want to look," Amanda taunted.

"My god," Rachel said, disgusted. She took a step forward, intent on corralling her out-of-control daughter, but Holly stayed her with a hand on her arm.

"Roger will handle this," Holly said.

"No, actually, I _**don't**_ want to look," Roger said. "And I would suggest you cover up before the police show up. I could go inside and call them right now, in fact. I know the commissioner personally." That was a bit of a stretch, but he could truthfully say he'd met the police commissioner.

"He's my stepbrother," Amanda said.

"Well, then, I really don't think he would appreciate you being half-naked on a public balcony," Roger said. "And suppose he wasn't the officer who responded? Who do you think they would arrest-the topless girl, or the man with his arms folded across his chest and his eyes closed, doing everything possible not to look?"

"I'm a good twenty years younger than that woman you're with," Amanda persisted. "How can you not want me?"

"Very easily," Roger said. "You're not her."

"Well, what does she have that I don't?" Amanda wanted to know.

"Everything," Roger replied. His neck was starting to get stiff, so he covered his still-closed eyes with his hands, brought his head down, and said, "Understand this, and understand it now: I don't want you. I have made this particular mistake too many times in my life. This could be my last chance to get it right with the only woman I've ever loved, and I'm not going to let you or anyone or anything get in our way or mess things up for us. Not again. Not ever again."

"Love doesn't have anything to do with it," Amanda said stubbornly. "I'm talking about sex. Just sex. No strings, no commitments, just fun."

"Fun? No, that's not fun. Not to me," Roger replied. "I don't take sex that lightly. Not anymore. To me, it_** is** _a commitment. You're barking up the wrong tree."

"Did you just call me a dog?" Amanda asked, insulted.

"You're acting like a bitch in heat, yes," Roger said. He turned around then, dropped his hands from his eyes...and found himself looking at Holly and Rachel.

That was when Rachel rushed out to the balcony. "For God's sake, Amanda, cover yourself! This is a public place that happens to be owned by my oldest and dearest friend, and you're out here flashing your breasts to a man that has made it abundantly clear that he doesn't want you! What is wrong with you?"

Roger didn't hear one word Amanda said to her mother, and didn't notice or care whether she covered herself. All he could see was Holly. "I didn't-" he began.

"I know," she assured him. "I saw. I heard you. It was all her, it wasn't you." Then Holly went out on the balcony, where Rachel had finally gotten Amanda to dress herself again, and mother and daughter were heatedly arguing with one another as Rachel was trying to order Amanda home while Amanda insisted that she was adult and perfectly capable of running her own life.

"Excuse me," Holly interrupted them, her intense gaze boring into Amanda with the fire of an exploding volcano. "Hello, we haven't been formally introduced yet. I'm Holly Lindsey, the woman whose significant other you just tried to screw on this balcony."

"He came on to me," Amanda insisted.

"No, he didn't," Holly replied evenly. "I know you're lying because first of all, I know Roger, and I trust him completely. He's not cheating on me. He _**won't** _cheat on me. Secondly," here Holly waved one hand in the vicinity of Amanda's now-covered breasts. "...those are fake."

"They are not!" Amanda shrieked indignantly. Behind and to the side of Holly, Roger coughed to cover a laugh, while Rachel, standing next to Amanda, wordlessly watched Holly lambaste Amanda.

"Please. You move, and they don't. That means they're fake," Holly continued. "And Roger has had his share of pretty young things, but he doesn't go for surgically enhanced pretty young things. Finally, I was watching the whole thing from right inside. _**You**_ followed Roger out here, _**you**_ came on to him, he rejected you, and now you're trying to salve your ego by claiming that he came on to you." She shook her head. "I feel sorry for you, Amanda. The world is not so enlightened that a woman who behaves the way you do, jumping from man to man and bed to bed, will be labeled and whispered about and known as anything other than...what's a polite term for what I'm trying to say...a strumpet." She remembered what Donna had called Amanda that morning and went with that. "And yes, it's hypocritical, because a man who does the same thing doesn't get half the judgment and half the garbage that a woman does. But still, man or woman, there comes a point where it stops being amusing and becomes unbearably sad. Clearly, the way you were throwing yourself at Roger half-naked a minute ago, you haven't reached that point yet. I don't know how many more public humiliations like this it's going to take for you to reach that point, and I don't care. But Roger and I are not going to be a part of any future public humiliations like this, because if we are, I won't be nearly as nice to you about it again as I'm being right now, are we clear?" Holly's tone left no room for argument or misunderstanding, even with Amanda's tendency toward obtuseness, if not blatant stupidity.

Amanda stubbornly refused to acknowledge Holly, so Holly repeated in a hard, icy tone of voice. "Are we clear?"

"Yes," Amanda all but snarled.

"Rachel, I'll talk to you tomorrow," Holly said, turning her full attention to Rachel now. Rachel murmured acknowledgement of Holly's comment.

Holly then turned to Roger. "Do you want to get out of here? I find I don't like the atmosphere," she said.

"Neither do I," Roger replied. "Yes, by all means, let's go." But before they left, he looked at Amanda and said seriously but without rancor, "You really need to learn some self-respect. Maybe you're fine for now being a sex object, but sooner or later you're going to have to start respecting yourself if you expect anyone else to respect you." Then Roger and Holly left TOPS.

Roger leaned his head back against the elevator wall as they rode down to the parking garage and sighed. "What? What's the matter?" Holly asked worriedly.

Roger looked at her. "This is not the top drawer evening I had planned. Some half-naked stalker bimbo who doesn't understand what 'I'm with someone' means ruining everything. The way you handled her was magnificent, though."

"She didn't ruin anything," Holly said. Roger raised his head from the elevator wall and looked at her skeptically. "All right, yes, she annoyed me, and she bothered you. I can't say I don't understand why she found you appealing."

"I hope you want me for a lot more than she did," Roger said.

"Don't worry, I do," Holly assured him. "Anyway, I said what I had to say, you said what you had to say, and it's over and done with. I'm not going to let her take anything away from tonight."

"Then I won't either," Roger said.

The elevator doors opened on the parking garage then. "We probably can't get reservations anywhere else," Roger said regretfully as they walked to the car.

"I don't need dinner at a five-star restaurant," Holly said. "Anywhere is fine, as long as we're there together."

"So, what, we just get in the car and drive and stop at the first place that looks good?" Roger asked.

"Why not?" Holly asked as she stopped beside the car.

Roger stopped too and looked at her. She looked beautiful, as always, and happy, as she did lately whenever they were together. But there was something else: she looked free. She looked freer than he had ever seen her look, and it hit Roger that she looked so free, that she _**was**_ so free, because she was with him. All she wanted was to be with him. That's what she kept saying; that's what she kept showing him.

He had meant it earlier in the evening when he had told Holly that he was starting to believe that they would find their way back together. He was beginning to trust her in a way he had never trusted her before. He knew Holly well enough to know that if she was really angry about that scene with Amanda Cory, she couldn't fake this kind of contentment, the air of freedom she wore like a shawl around her shoulders.

It was a glorious summer night, and he was with Holly. That was all that mattered to her. It would be all that mattered to him.

"Yeah, why not?" he agreed. He held her car door for her, then hurried around to the driver's side.

Fifteen minutes later, they were sitting in the dimly lit back booth of a pizzeria that was otherwise inhabited with high school and college kids enjoying the summer night. The deep dish pizza was baked in a brick oven and served by the slice. Holly was torn between the sausage and the mushroom. "Why don't you get the mushroom and I'll get the sausage, and we'll share?" Roger suggested. "Those are huge slices." Holly's answering smile was all the confirmation Roger needed, and a few minutes later, a waitress brought two huge, square slices of pizza, one sausage and one mushroom, on plates with knives and forks, two frosted glasses filled with ice, and a pitcher of Coca-Cola to their booth.

Roger smiled when he saw Holly pick the mushrooms off her pizza one at a time and eat them. She had always done that, as far back as he could recall. "What?" she asked, reaching for a napkin to wipe her fingers before taking a sip of her Coke.

"Just remembering," Roger said as he cut into his own slice of pizza.

"The cheese is always hotter than the mushrooms," Holly said. "Besides, I like the mushrooms the best." She plucked another mushroom from her slice of pizza and held it out to him. "Try one," she said.

Roger surprised her by eating the mushroom from her fingers instead of taking it in his own hand before popping it in his mouth, then kissing each of her fingertips tenderly, one by one, causing Holly to give a little shiver that she and Roger both knew was not caused by the arctic temperature of the air conditioning blasting through the pizzeria.

Then Roger plucked a piece of sausage from his own slice of pizza and held it out to Holly, who ate the piece of sausage from his hand just as he had eaten the mushroom from hers a moment ago, taking care to lick from his fingers the little bit of pizza sauce that clung there, and causing Roger to give her a smoldering look that Holly half-thought would cause the building to catch fire around them.

The moment was broken by a loud crashing noise; a group of high school kids at a large table nearby were hooting and hollering because one of the boys had tried to jerk the tablecloth from the table and had brought all of the dishes, glasses, and the remaining pizza and drinks crashing loudly to the floor in a mess of sticky soda, melting ice, pizza crusts and cold, unfinished slices, scattered silverware, and broken glass.

"Kids," Roger said with a nervous laugh.

"Yeah," Holly replied, also laughing nervously.

Roger leaned across the table. "It's not that I don't want you," he said softly. "You know that, right?"

"I know," Holly said just as softly, leaning across the table as well so that their faces were almost touching as they gazed into each other's eyes. "And I'm sure you know that I want you, too." He nodded briefly, once, holding her gaze all the while.

"I've probably set the world's record for the greatest number of cold showers in the past few months," Roger continued ruefully.

"Do they really work?" Holly asked. "I might start taking them myself if they do."

"They do okay as a stopgap measure," Roger replied. He paused for a beat, then said, "Sometimes."

"I think about us like that too," Holly said. "A lot. But I don't want anything to happen between us-" At his bemused look she said, "You know what I mean. I _**do, **_but I don't. Not until there are no doubts and no fears and no questions. But if and when it does happen-"

"When," Roger said.

"When?" Holly repeated, hoping she didn't sound too hopeful.

"When," Roger replied.

"That's good to know," Holly said with a soft smile. "So, _**when **_it happens, I'm not going to be pacing the balcony in the middle of the night, I'm not going to freak out and run away from you the next morning. And I don't want you pacing in the middle of the night or running away from me the next morning either."

"Neither do I," Roger agreed. "I want it to be the beginning of everything." Now he looked apologetic. "I need to know that's where we are before it happens: at the beginning of everything, and that when we finally do make love again, it will be a new start to a life together with you."

"Then we're agreed," Holly said.

"We're not on the same page yet, but we're reading the same book," Roger replied. "I'm getting there, Holly. I'm just...not there yet."

"I know that we're making progress. I feel it," she assured him. "And you..._**we**_...are worth the time and effort."

Roger leaned back. "So what do you say we finish eating, and then go home? To The Bayshore, I mean?"

"Yes, let's," Holly replied, also leaning back.

When they arrived back at The Bayshore, they were surprised to see Frankie Frame and Cass Winthrop sitting in the lobby, apparently waiting for them. When Frankie spotted them, she bolted to her feet and rushed across the lobby to meet them, Cass trailing in her wake.

"I must have called your cell phone a dozen times!" Frankie greeted them, looking right at Roger.

"I was out with Holly tonight, I turned the phone off," Roger replied.

"It's probably not a good idea to do that while this investigation is ongoing," Frankie said.

"You have news," Holly said.

"Yeah, and we'd better go someplace private to discuss this," Frankie said.

"Upstairs," Roger said. The quartet boarded the elevator, and when they reached the seventeenth floor, everyone went to Roger's suite.

"Okay, what's the news?" Roger asked.

"Dinah and Hart returned to Springfield from Chicago this afternoon, and I was following them the whole time," Frankie began. "They're running out of patience. They're going to turn up the heat because they are determined to push you over the edge and have you confined to a mental hospital, preferably in a straitjacket, within the next forty-eight hours."

"Is that all?" Roger asked.

"'Is that all'?" Frankie and Cass echoed incredulously in unison.

"Roger, they want to railroad you into a mental hospital!" Frankie exclaimed.

"You do realize that it's not like a regular hospital, where you can check yourself out, against medical advice if you feel it's necessary, right?" Cass asked.

Holly knew what the Winthrops did not: that Roger had been planning for just such a contingency. "I know," Roger replied as he walked over to the phone. "But if you're never actually a patient in the mental hospital in the first place, then it's no problem."

"What are you driving at?" Cass asked.

Roger picked up the phone and dialed, getting the answering machine he was expecting. "Rotorhead," he said after the beep, "it's me. You know that favor you offered? The one involving Jack Nicholson? It's a go. Call me back in the morning to go over the details."

Holly figured it out first. "_One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest_," she said.

"That's a code I knew he'd get but that was vague enough that anyone who might potentially have tapped the phone line wouldn't know specifically what I was referring to," Roger said.

Frankie figured it out next. "Whoever this 'Rotorhead' is, he has an in with a doctor somewhere so he can get you into a mental hospital, but not so you have to stay as an actual, real patient," she said.

"Yes," Roger said.

"So who is the mysterious Rotorhead?" Cass asked.

"Michael Hudson," Roger replied.

"Of course!" Frankie exclaimed. "John is the Chief of Staff at Bay City General, and they have an excellent psychiatric ward."

"You know John Hudson?" Holly asked.

"I've known him for years. He's my aunt, Sharlene's, husband," Frankie replied.

"Is everyone related around here?" Holly asked.

"Nah, it just seems like it," Frankie said. "This could work, Roger."

"It _**will**_ work," Roger corrected her determinedly. He looked at Holly now. "I have too much on the line for it_** not** _to work." Holly looked back at him, and for the first time since they had begun this journey of finding their way back to each other, she saw Roger's heart in his eyes. For the first time in two years, Roger_** let** _her see his heart in his eyes. Though he hadn't actually used the word 'trust' yet, this was a strong indication to Holly that he was learning to trust her again. He had told her earlier that he was starting to believe they would find their way together again. They were making progress.

Holly was standing close to Roger, and she reached out for his hand now. Once his hand was in hers, she looked from Roger, to Frankie and Cass, and back again. "So," she said, "what's the plan?"


	11. A Breakthrough and a Bombshell

"Well, obviously I have to go back to Springfield," Roger replied. "I'm sure Dinah will be spending the night with Hart tonight-"

"Oh yeah, she is," Frankie interjected.

"But she'll undoubtedly show up at the penthouse first thing in the morning, and then Hart will come by shortly thereafter so that they can begin working on me," Roger continued. He sighed. "I hate to do it, since it's his birthday, but I think I'd better touch base with Michael before going back to Springfield."

"And no one in Springfield knows that you and I are...what we are right now, so I can't be there," Holly realized.

"No, you can't," Roger agreed.

Holly sighed. "I hate this," she said. "They're trying to make you think you're insane. They want you sitting in a room with padded walls, in a straitjacket, and you're going to have to face them tomorrow alone, and I don't trust them not to drug you or something if you don't act crazy enough for their liking."

"I can be very convincing when I need to be. That's how I survived in the Agency for so long," Roger said. Truthfully, he didn't put it past Dinah and Hart to drug him either, and if that happened, then he wouldn't be at Bay City General with Michael's brother as his "doctor." Dinah and Hart would stick him in the first hellhole they could find and leave him there to rot, with all of his avenues for help-Holly, Chrissy, Michael, Frankie and Cass-unavailable to him. "I won't eat or drink anything around them, and I'll put on the best crazy act this side of Ingrid Bergman in _Gaslight_."

"I really hate that I can't be there with you, watching out for you," Holly said softly.

Roger looked at Holly helplessly. "I wish you could be there too, but they don't know that you tipped me off about what they're really doing in the first place, and they can't know, because if they know, then they might come after you, and I won't have that."

"Ah, Mary Frances, shouldn't we leave them alone?" Cass whispered to his wife.

"We should," Frankie whispered back, "but I still have to go over with Roger exactly what _**my**_ part in this is, and unlike Holly, I _**do**_ have one." She looked at Holly and Roger. "Wow. It's like looking in a mirror five years ago."

"It really is," Cass agreed, "except I was generally persuasive enough to get you to let me tag along for work stuff. Although we were never in a situation like theirs."

"Except for the New Year's Eve stakeout you ran out on," Frankie reminded him.

"Because I couldn't trust myself not to do something stupid like try to make love to you," Cass replied. "I sat in the hall all night."

"I never knew that," Frankie said, surprised.

"I didn't really _**want**_ to leave you, but I knew I had to get out of that hotel room or I'd completely mess us up," Cass said.

"You did have the annoying habit of proposing to me almost constantly back then," Frankie recalled.

"I wanted to be married to you. I made the mistake of letting you go once. It wasn't a mistake I was going to compound by spending any more time away from you than I absolutely had to," Cass replied.

"I just hate that you have to walk into that lions' den and face them down by yourself, okay?" Holly said, bringing Cass and Frankie back to the present. "I love you, I worry about you. It comes with the territory."

"But I'm not going to be facing them down by myself," Roger pointed out. "For one thing, I'm guessing that Frankie is going to be nearby-"

"Yes, that's why Cass and I are still here," Frankie interrupted then. "To talk about exactly where nearby I'll be tomorrow."

"-and for another," Roger continued, "I won't really be going in there alone." At Holly's skeptical look, Roger amended, "All right, yes, literally, in that moment, it will be me by myself with Hart and Dinah, but when I get out of there, I'll know that you're waiting for me. And I'm not really going to a mental hospital. Not to stay. A few hours with Michael's brother shepherding me around and overseeing me, and I'll be walking the streets again. Well, the streets of Bay City, not the streets of Springfield. And you'll be my first call, I promise."

"I hate that I can't be there," Holly said again.

"You don't have to like it," Roger replied. "You just have to do it. This is the necessary next step."

Holly sighed. "I'll be your first call?" she asked.

"The second the coast is clear and I get to a phone," Roger said, crossing his heart.

Speaking of the phone, it rang then. Roger grabbed it on the first ring. "Hello?"

"I got your message, Roger," Michael Hudson said on the other end of the line.

"I'm really sorry to interrupt your birthday," Roger said, chagrined.

"It's 12:03 AM. It's not my birthday anymore, and it was a great one. So, you need me to set in motion what we talked about before?" Michael replied.

"Yes," Roger said. "As soon as possible."

"So where are we at? Defcon what?" Michael wanted to know.

Roger considered this for a moment. "Defcon Three," he finally said. "Serious, but still a few steps away from nuclear war."

"Understood," Michael said. "I take it you'll be returning to base?"

"Affirmative," Roger confirmed. "I'm leaving tonight."

"Jack Nicholson and I will be standing by, waiting for word from you," Michael promised. "Call when you need us."

"Will do," Roger promised, then hung up the phone.

After finishing his phone conversation with Michael, Roger gave Frankie the address of the penthouse in Springfield. She would follow him there now with listening devices, plant them in the penthouse, and then she would record everything while monitoring the bugs from her car in the building's parking garage. Once that was settled, Frankie and Cass finally left Roger and Holly alone.

After the Winthrops had departed, Roger said, "I'd better be heading back myself. Frankie said something about following me there, and I'll need to pack a few things, and have them hold this suite for me." But he didn't head to the bedroom to pack. He stood where he was, beside Holly. And she stood stock still as well, looking back at him.

"So much to say, no idea how to say it, or where to start," Holly said, smiling weakly.

"Yeah," Roger said. He looked at Holly with such obvious longing that it took her breath away. "Not all of my fantasies and dreams about you are about making love with you. There are a lot of things I dream about, or fantasize about, doing with you, and having long, uninterrupted conversations about everything and nothing is one of those things."

"It's that way for me too," Holly replied. "In fact-" She stopped abruptly, biting her lip and looked down.

Roger took one of Holly's hands in his and gently tipped her chin up with his other hand so she had to meet his gaze again. "In fact what?" he asked.

"It's silly," she said.

"You're allowed to be silly with me," Roger said, giving Holly a look of encouragement.

She paused for a minute, then said, "Something I've thought about is staying up all night with you and just talking."

"We'll have to do that when things calm down some," Roger said. He was holding both of her hands in his now. "Part of me wishes that Dinah and Hart had waited until tomorrow to do this, but the rest of me wants to get going on this and get on with it, so that I can concentrate on you, and on us."

"You be careful when you're with them," Holly said. "Promise me you'll be careful." The look in her eyes matched the urgent, intense tone in her voice.

That was a promise Roger could easily make. "I promise," he said solemnly. "I'm not going to take any chances. I meant what I said a few minutes ago: I have too much on the line now for this _**not**_ to work. I want to get everything with Dinah and Hart settled because I don't want any shadows hanging over us, and until I'm legally free of Dinah, and she has her money back, that's what she and Hart are, a shadow hanging over us. And I don't want them hurting you in any way."

"I don't want them hurting you in any way either," Holly said.

"They won't. I won't let that happen," Roger promised. "Can I tell you something?"

"You can tell me anything," Holly replied.

"When I was in the Agency, before going on a particularly dangerous mission, I would always find myself thinking of you, and Blake," he confessed. "And compared to most of my missions, this is a cakewalk. I survived those missions because I knew if I didn't, any chance I might have to make things up to you and our daughter, to make things_** right** _with the two of you, would be gone...and that's when you thought I was dead, and thinking that you and I could be together again was the ultimate pie-in-the-sky dream. Well, now it's not a dream anymore. It's a real chance, and it's becoming realer every day. I'm not going to do anything to risk losing this chance, because I've never wanted anything in my life as much as I want to get things right with you, Holly."

Holly swallowed past the lump in her throat with difficulty. "I've never wanted anything in my life more than I want to get things right with you," she said tearfully. She cleared her throat, which did nothing to dislodge or dissolve the lump there. "You'd better go," she said, "before I really start crying."

Now Roger looked pained. "If there was any other way..." he whispered.

"I know," Holly whispered back. Unable to stop herself, to resist the impulse, she reached out and touched Roger's face, the way she always used to do during that all-too-brief year they were together in Springfield and she was feeling particularly affectionate towards him. He closed his eyes and leaned into her touch for several seconds. He knew exactly what it meant when Holly touched his face like this, and after nearly two years without feeling her touch upon his face, he was going to savor it for these few seconds.

When he opened his eyes and saw her standing there in front of him, looking at him tearfully, her hand still resting on his cheek, he looked into her wet eyes for the space of two heartbeats, then brought his own hand up and rested it on top of the hand she had on his cheek. Then he gently turned his head and pressed a soft kiss into her palm. Her breath caught, then she whispered, "Be safe."

"I will," he vowed. He took her hand in his again then, squeezed it, and said, "I love you."

"I love you too," Holly replied in a choked voice. Then, because she was in Roger's suite, after she squeezed his hand back, she let go of his hand and hurried out the door and down the hall to her own suite. Since she didn't look back, she didn't know that Roger gave her a few seconds' lead time, then followed her to the door and watched her rush down the hall to her own suite, unlock and throw open the door, and slam it shut behind her.

"Nothing and no one is going to get in our way this time, or ever again," Roger promised Holly before he quickly packed, made arrangements for his suite to be held, and then drove back to Springfield.

Meanwhile, Holly was doing some packing of her own, and about half an hour after Roger had left The Bayshore, she left too, after making similar arrangements for her suite to be held, also headed to Springfield, to her house, where it took her hours to fall asleep.

Roger was having similar difficulties sleeping at the penthouse, and he of course had no idea that Holly was nearby at her own house. He managed to get about four hours' sleep, and then he gave up at 6 AM and called The Bayshore, figuring that Holly wouldn't mind if he woke her up this early just this once. Ned, Roger's favorite concierge, answered the phone. When he asked to be put through to Ms. Lindsey's suite, Ned replied, "You mean you didn't know, Mr. Thorpe?"

"Know what?" Roger asked anxiously, his grip on the receiver tightening.

"Well, I came on at 11 last night, as you know, because I was the one who made arrangements to hold your suite for you until you return," Ned continued. "Ms. Lindsey left about half an hour after you did, after asking me to do the same with her suite, and she had a small suitcase, the same as you. I thought you knew."

"Holly left last night?" Roger asked, surprised.

"Yes, she did," Ned replied. "But we're holding her suite, the same as we're holding yours. There must have been a breakdown in communication."

"Something like that," Roger said. Holly had to be here in Springfield. If she left The Bayshore, where else would she have gone but her own house? "Thank you, Ned."

"Anything you need, Mr. Thorpe, you and Ms. Lindsey know where to find me," Ned said.

Roger was halfway through punching in Holly's home number when an insistent knocking came at his door. Biting back a curse, he hung up the phone, donned his bathrobe, and opened the door to Frankie. "You look like hell," she greeted him as she breezed past him.

"I didn't get much sleep last night," Roger grumbled as he closed the door.

"That's a good thing," Frankie replied. "The more haggard you look to Dinah and Hart, the more believable your 'breakdown' will be to them." Frankie then busied herself setting up the bugs throughout the penthouse. "That should do it," she said when she'd finished. "I'll be recording and monitoring everything from my car in the parking garage downstairs. And if things get dicey, I'll call the local police immediately."

"I can't thank you enough for all that you're doing to help me out with this, Frankie," Roger said, and he meant that sincerely. He was not the kind of person who had gotten much help from others throughout his life, and he was genuinely, sincerely appreciative of everything Frankie and Cass, and Michael, and now Michael's brother, were doing to help him, and to help Holly.

"Everyone needs help from time to time," Frankie said, "and I'm a big believer in good karma. And as much as you and Holly remind me of myself and Cass years ago, how can I not help you?"

"I just hope that Holly and I eventually get to a place where we're as happy together as you and Cass are," Roger said.

"You will," Frankie said certainly. "I'll be downstairs, listening to and recording every word. Good luck, Paula." At Roger's confused look, Frankie clarified, "Ingrid Bergman's character in _Gaslight_. You mentioned the movie last night."

"Right," Roger said. He showered, decided to forego shaving since he looked more unkempt with stubble on his face, and then there was nothing for him to do but wait for Dinah and Hart to show up.

And he didn't have to wait long.

Dinah walked in the door a few minutes after eight AM. She seized on Roger's appearance immediately. "Roger, you don't look so good," she said, feigning deep concern over the way he looked.

"I don't?" Roger asked blankly.

"You really don't," she said.

Then Dinah acted like it was a big coincidence when Hart showed up fifteen minutes later. Roger knew it was anything but coincidental, but he channeled all of his energy into acting extremely fragile. Roger asked Hart about something Hart had mentioned a few weeks ago, about Peter, and Hart played it off as if Roger wasn't remembering it correctly at all, as if the conversation never happened. Dinah, naturally, backed Hart up, and then both of them were working overtime to convince Roger that the conversation about Peter had never taken place at all.

Then they went in for the kill, with first Dinah and then Hart suggesting that maybe Roger should talk to somebody, a professional, because these mental lapses had been going on for the past few months, and they were obviously getting worse now that Roger was remembering conversations that never even happened.

Roger played right into their hands, and cleverly got them to agree to take him to Bay City General Hospital, helped along by the serendipitous stroke of luck that Cedars had no in-patient beds available on their psychiatric wing. Also, because Dinah and Hart believed that Roger was checking in for an extended stay at Bay City General's psychiatric wing, he was able to take his suitcase and shaving kit back with him without arousing their suspicions. He couldn't hear them while he was packing in the bedroom, since they had stayed in the living room and were speaking in hushed tones, but he had no doubt that Frankie was getting an earful in the parking garage thanks to the bugs she had planted earlier.

A short while later, Dinah and Hart were flanking Roger as they walked through the doors of Bay City General Hospital. A quick check of the directory in the lobby sent them upstairs to the floor where the psychiatric wing was housed, and Roger was relieved to see Michael sitting behind the main desk, dressed in a white coat and with a very real-looking ID badge with his picture on it clipped to the pocket of that white coat.

"Can I help you?" Michael asked when they stepped up to the desk.

"Yes," Dinah said, "we'd like to check my husband in."

"Let me get our chief of psychiatry," Michael said. He then paged Dr. John Hudson to the ninth floor.

Dr. John Hudson was a tall man, but that was where his similarity to his older brother ended. Where Michael had blond hair shot through with strands of silver, blue eyes, and was clean shaven, John had salt-and-pepper hair that was more salt than pepper, a full mustache and beard that matched, and brown eyes. He exuded an air of calm competence, and Roger felt instantly at ease with him, especially when John said that Dinah and Hart would have to wait outside while John conducted his preliminary examination of Roger.

Roger and John hadn't been in the exam room for a full minute when the adjoining door opened and Michael entered. "How you holding up, Roger?" Michael asked.

"A lot better now that the hard part's over," Roger replied truthfully. He extended his hand to John Hudson for a handshake. "I can't thank you enough for doing this," he said.

"Anything for a friend of Mike's," John replied as he shook hands with Roger.

While Roger, with the help of the Hudson brothers, was scamming Dinah and Hart into believing that he was about to begin a three-month stint on the psychiatric wing of Bay City General Hospital, Holly spent the day giving her house a thorough cleaning from top to bottom and getting rid of a lot of things she didn't really need any longer in the process.

When she was cleaning out her closet after she'd had an early dinner, she found the heart that Roger had cut out of a memo at WSPR and given to her on Valentine's Day two years ago. It was the next day that she had given him a key and formally asked him to move in with her, and he had accepted, telling her that he'd been happier in that little house with her than he'd ever been anywhere in his life.

But too many people and too many things had gotten in their way back then, Holly reflected as she sank down on the edge of the bed, the paper heart in her hand. The only person whose support they really had in Springfield was Blake's. The more toxic aspects of their history were too well known in this town, and never forgotten. Apparently no one could truly fathom how Holly could forgive Roger for everything that had happened between them years ago. But they didn't have that problem in Bay City. Given that Frankie was a private investigator, Holly was fairly certain that Frankie knew exactly how toxic Holly and Roger's early years truly were, but she didn't sit in judgment of them for wanting to be together again, she didn't look as Roger as a career criminal or at Holly like someone who had taken leave of her senses, she didn't bring up the past at all. All of Frankie's focus was on the present and the future. It was the same way with Cass, and with Michael and Donna, and with Rachel. For them, the past was remembered, certainly; mistakes were admitted and learned from; the good memories were held onto; and the future was looked forward to with eager anticipation. And every single one of them was rooting for her and Roger to find their way together again, and either directly helping them deal with the obstacles in their path or had offered to help them in any way that they could.

There was an insistent knock at Holly's front door then. She carefully laid the paper heart on top of the black velvet jewelry case she had brought with her from Bay City, whose contents she had spent a good amount of time looking at earlier, that was on her nightstand by the phone and the bedside lamp, and went to answer the door.

Blake was standing on the porch, with Kevin and Jason both asleep in their double stroller. She looked unhappy. "Good, you _**are**_ here," she said. "Ross and I had an argument and he stormed out of the house, and I couldn't just sit there and stew about it, so I packed up the boys, and they fell asleep on the drive over. Can we come in?"

"Of course," Holly said, relieving Blake of the giant diaper bag she carried and her purse as she carefully wheeled the boys into the house. "What did you and Ross argue about?" she asked as she carefully, quietly closed the front door.

"Need you ask?" Blake inquired sardonically.

"Dinah," Holly realized.

Blake checked on Kevin and Jason, who were both sleeping peacefully in their stroller, then sank down on the couch with a weary sigh. Holly sat down next to her. "I agree with Ross that her marrying Dad was a big mistake," Blake began, turning to face her mother, who was facing her. "They haven't been around much lately, either one of them. Ross thinks that means they're off somewhere together getting close for real. I believe it's much more likely that Dinah is off somewhere plotting against Dad and waiting to lower the boom, or she's off with someone else getting close for real, but God forbid I cast such aspersions on Ross's precious saint of a daughter. I didn't know her when she was 17. Maybe she really _**was**_ like that then, but she's certainly not like that now. And I know this because I used to _**be**_ her, at least the way she is now."

Blake tilted her head back and stared at the ceiling. "Ross underestimates her. He thinks there's no possible way she could get back at Dad for anything, but I'm just as certain that he's wrong about that, and I just have this horrible feeling that something big and awful is going to have to happen for him to see that." She lifted her head and looked at her mother again. "I don't want to fight with Ross about this," she continued. "And I don't want to say 'I told you so.' I don't want to see anybody get hurt here, including Dinah, because that would hurt Ross, but it's out of my hands, and I just can't shake the feeling that something is going on that I don't know anything about. but I'm convinced that Dinah is up to something, and whatever it is, it's really going to knock Ross for a loop when he eventually finds out about it, because I don't know exactly what she's up to, but I'm sure it isn't good."

Holly silently reflected that Blake was right on both counts: Dinah was indeed up to something that wasn't good, and she was also off getting close with somebody who wasn't Roger. But she and Roger were still determined to protect Blake as much as possible, so Holly elected not to inform Blake that she, Holly, knew what Dinah was up to, or how she had that information. "Did you tell Ross that you're not looking for an opportunity to say 'I told you so,' you're just trying to look out for him?" Holly asked.

"Yeah, but I don't think he believes that," Blake said sadly. "He knows that I've never been Dinah's biggest fan, and that the feeling is mutual, but so far, he's only blaming me for the fact that Dinah and I don't get along. I'll take my share of responsibility for that fact. But Dinah needs to take responsibility for her part in this too, and she's not." She sighed. "I get that it's weird for her, having a stepmother that's closer to her age than her father's, but Vanessa doesn't take this kind of stuff from Dinah for being married to Matt Reardon, and Matt and I are the same age. Of course Ross says that's because Dinah has always been closer to him than she's been to Vanessa, but that seems like a weak excuse to me. Matt says she doesn't like him either, but he doesn't let it bother him, and she's not trying to come between him and Vanessa. I don't know, maybe she's resentful because Kevin and Jason get to grow up with Ross, and she didn't. Maybe she resents me because she wishes Ross was with Vanessa. I could understand that. I never liked anybody else Dad was with, and the only other man you were ever with that I liked was Ed because who doesn't like Ed Bauer, except for Dad."

Then Blake looked her mother right in the eye and said, "I don't suppose you and Dad have secretly gotten back together and you're just not saying anything because your divorce from Fletcher isn't final yet, and he hasn't even gotten divorce proceedings with Dinah started? Because if you have, I wish you'd tell me, because I could really use that kind of incredible news right now."

Holly had no idea how to answer that question, but she was saved from having to try to answer by Kevin letting out an ear-splitting wail. "Shh shh shh," Blake soothed as she picked him up and cuddled him close to her. He started rooting at her blouse. "Okay, that answers that question," she said. "I'm just going to take him back there and feed him, okay? Can you stay out here and watch Jason? Bring him back to me if he wakes up crying?"

"Sure," Holly agreed. Blake took Kevin into Holly's bedroom, and Holly stayed in the living room and regarded Jason, snoozing contentedly in the stroller. "Your brother has excellent timing," she said quietly so as not to wake Jason. "Your grandpa and I aren't back together yet, but we're working on it, but we don't want to say anything to your mommy until everything is all settled." She studied Jason's tiny face. "You sure do look like your grandpa-his dark hair, his eyes. You haven't seen much of either one of us lately, I know, but that's going to change. We just have to take care of some unpleasant grown-up things first."

The phone rang then, and Holly snatched it up in the middle of the first ring before it could wake Jason. Back in Holly's bedroom, Blake heard the phone ring and wondered if it was Ross, calling looking for her and the boys. "Hello?" Holly said quietly.

"It's me," Roger said on the other end.

"Are you all right?" Holly asked anxiously.

"Yeah," Roger said. "It worked." The wonder and relief were palpable in Roger's voice in those two words, but then he elaborated. "Frankie recorded everything this morning, and she's got them on tape discussing their gaslighting of me, how the plan worked because I agreed to go to the psych wing at Bay City General, how they were going to get the money out of the Cayman Island account...all of it. She played it for me after I left the hospital. Michael and his brother John played their parts perfectly. I didn't know Michael was going to be there until I got there, but he was, and it all went off with a hitch. We've got them, Holly."

"That's great," Holly said, and she felt the knot of tension in her chest dissolve. Roger was out of danger, and Frankie had, as promised, gotten proof of everything Dinah and Hart were really doing, or trying to do, to Roger.

"And I told Dinah that I didn't think it was fair that she stayed tied to me while I was recovering, so I told her to go ahead and file for divorce, that I would sign whatever I needed to sign so that she could get on with her life with someone healthier and more deserving of her than I. She put up a token protest, but finally she agreed, so I figure she'll be having Ross file the papers ASAP," Roger continued.

"That's wonderful," Holly said. "I'm just so glad that you're all right."

In Holly's bedroom, Blake's curiosity got the better of her. It wasn't entirely out of the realm of possibility for Holly to be discussing her with Ross for a minute or two if Ross was the one on the phone; they were friends, after all. Blake carefully picked up the receiver and put it to her ear...and got the shock of her life when she heard who it was her mother was talking to, and what they were saying.

"Are you back at The Bayshore now?" she heard Holly ask.

"Actually, I'm at Michael and Donna's," Roger replied. _Dad?! And_ w_ho are Michael and Donna?_, Blake wondered. Roger went on, "I was at the hospital for a few hours, and then we had to make sure that Dinah and Hart really left. Then I met with Frankie, she played the tape for me, and then since my car is still in Springfield, Michael picked me up from the law office, and he insisted that I have dinner with him and Donna. And I know nobody's tapped their phone, so I told him I was gonna call you before we eat. So, as promised, you're my first call as soon as I could get to a phone."

_This Frankie must be a private investigator,_ Blake mused to herself. _But I don't remember hearing that name from Dad before. And I **knew **Dinah was up to something no good, but who else is in on it with her? Dad said 'they,' so somebody else is helping her, but who?_

"You might have mentioned last night that you were going back to Springfield too," Roger said then.

"I guess I should have told you," Holly agreed. "But I didn't actually make the decision until I ran out of your suite. I knew I couldn't be there with you when you saw them, but I needed to be as close to you as I could when I knew you were with them, so I came back to my house last night."

"Ned told me you'd left half an hour after I did when I called The Bayshore this morning at 6 AM looking for you," Roger replied. _Ned? What the...Why don't I know any of these people?,_ Blake wondered, frustrated._ Who **are** these people to my parents? "_I was going to call you at your house this morning, but Frankie got there before I could."

"I'm coming back in the morning," Holly told him. "I'd come back tonight, but Blake and the boys are here. She asked me if you and I are secretly back together and just not saying anything yet because we're still legally married to Fletcher and Dinah."

"What did you say?" Roger asked.

"Kevin started wailing, so I didn't have to say anything, which is good because I didn't know _**what**_ to say," Holly replied. "We agreed that we weren't going to say anything to Blake until we have something definite to tell her."

"Yes," Roger agreed, "and I think we should stick to that. Ross is laboring under the delusion that Dinah is like Mother Teresa. Once he finds out what she and Hart have really been up to-"

Blake nearly dropped the phone at this point. _Hart?! Dinah and Hart?! Whoa!_

"-that delusion will be shattered into a million pieces, and that's when he's really going to need Chrissy and Kevin and Jason, because the truth about Dinah is going to blindside him. I just hope that he lets Chrissy be there for him."

"And neither one of us wants Ross to suspect that Blake knew anything about this until after it's all out in the open," Holly said. "The last thing either of them needs is Ross blaming Blake for this. Blake is the one person truly innocent here."

"So are you," Roger pointed out, "although if Ross knew that we're getting closer, I doubt he'd see it that way."

_They're getting closer? Exactly what does **that** mean?,_ Blake wondered, riveted by her parents' phone conversation.

"I think Ross will have a few other things to worry about besides us," Holly said. "I want there to be an us, Roger."

"I do too," Roger said. "I'm not there yet, but I'm getting there. I am. If you'll just be patient with me a little while longer, Holly..."

"I will be patient as long as it takes," Holly replied. "I want you to be able to trust me without any doubts and without any fears. And you're worth the wait."

"I love you," Roger said.

"I love you too," Holly replied.

"And we'll be able to concentrate more on each other now that things are progressing on the Dinah and Hart front," Roger said.

"I like the sound of that," Holly said, and both Roger and Blake could hear the happiness in her voice.

_They_ _**are** getting back together!,_ Blake silently exulted. _At least, they're working on it. This is the best news I've heard in forever!_

"I should probably get off the phone before Blake comes back from feeding Kevin," Holly said.

"Kiss the boys for me, and I'll see you when you get back to The Bayshore," Roger said.

"First thing," Holly said. "Good night."

"Good night," Roger said softly.

Blake waited until she heard Holly hang up the phone before she hung up the bedroom extension, but when she did, she accidentally knocked the items sitting in front of the phone off Holly's bedside table and onto the floor. Kevin was sound asleep, so Blake carefully laid him on Holly's bed and surrounded him with pillows before dropping to her knees on the floor to pick up the rectangular black velvet box and the piece of paper on top of it.

When she picked up the piece of paper, she saw that it was a heart. There was writing on one side, but it wasn't what she expected, since it contained sentence fragments-what was it, a memo?-and part of a date: _-uary 14, 1994. _Valentine's Day two years ago.

Her parents had been together on Valentine's Day two years ago. She remembered them coming to The Towers that night, and she talked with them while Ross was off talking with Bridget about her upcoming custody case with Vanessa over Peter.

Her mother had kept this because it had come from her father.

But when Blake picked up the rectangular black velvet box and brushed the lint off the top, she didn't think, didn't question, she just reacted. She opened the box, and what she saw inside caused her to nearly drop it.

Because nestled securely inside that rectangular black velvet box were two platinum wedding rings.

Two small folded pieces of paper were tucked into the lid, and Blake looked at them: receipts, one for the purchase of the rings, one for the engraving inside them, both with Holly's name on them as the purchaser, though the amounts were scratched out...and both receipts were dated May 27.

_Oh my god,_ Blake thought as the meaning of the rings hit her full force._ Mom wants to marry Dad! They're working some things out, and neither one of their divorces is final yet, but she wants to marry him! He didn't sound like he knows that yet, though...Oh, Mom, how romantic. _She knew that her father had proposed to her mother, but Holly hadn't given him an answer before Alex and Fletcher and Dinah and everything going to hell. And when she had eavesdropped on her parents' phone conversation a few minutes ago, Holly had said that she wanted Roger to be able to trust her with no doubts and no fears, and Roger had said he wasn't there yet, but he was getting there. They really were getting closer, working things out, and once they did, Blake realized, Holly wanted Roger to know just how serious she was about wanting them to be together, hence these wedding rings. But Roger clearly didn't know that Holly was thinking that far ahead yet, and Blake wasn't about to say anything to either one of them about finding the rings.

She carefully replaced the rings and the paper heart, then scooped Kevin up. "Oh, Kevin," she whispered to her sleeping baby boy, "you'll keep the secret with Mommy, won't you? You and me and Jason, we're not going to let anything mess up Grandma and Grandpa's chance this time."

That was when Blake heard Jason crying from the living room. She hurried back out there, settled the sleeping Kevin in the stroller and picked up Jason, praying that her face didn't give her away to her mother. Before Blake went to feed and change Jason, she looked at her mother, who was tucking Kevin's blanket around him to ward off any possible chill from the air conditioning.

Blake's poker face was convincing enough that Holly didn't notice anything amiss. But when Holly sat back on the couch after tucking the blanket around Kevin, Blake certainly noticed the happy sparkle in her mother's eyes, and now she knew for certain that her father was the reason for it.

The happy sparkle was still there when Holly appeared in the bedroom doorway to tell Blake that Ross was waiting for her in the living room. Blake finished changing Jason and carried him out to the living room, and before she could say anything, Ross said, "I'm sorry, Blake. I feel like Dinah's up to something too, and I have no idea what it is, and it frustrates me that she won't let me in, and I took it out on you and I shouldn't have."

Blake went to Ross. "I'm on your side," she told him seriously, "no matter what."

"I know," he said, taking Jason from her, then pulling her into a hug with his other arm. "Can we go home and talk about this calmly after these guys are asleep?"

"Yes," Blake replied. "And if they'll sleep long enough, maybe we can even make up all the way."

Blake noticed that Holly kissed both Kevin and Jason twice, and knew that one of those kisses was from Roger.

After Holly said good night to Blake and Ross, and they left with the boys, she went back to her bedroom and picked up the rectangular black velvet box from her nightstand. She opened it and looked at the wedding rings inside, gently touching both rings with the tip of her index finger.

"Someday," she said aloud. "We're going to get it right this time, Roger."


	12. The Greatest Fan of Your Life

Holly returned to Bay City the next morning, which, Frankie reported that same afternoon, was also the day that Dinah and Hart jetted off to the Cayman Islands together on open tickets, with no specific return date, just round-trip tickets, meaning they would be coming back at some point, but obviously they hadn't decided exactly when that would be yet.

Ross and Vanessa were equally bewildered when Dinah left them both answering machine messages announcing that she was going away for a while to clear her head. ("Her head gets any clearer, it'll be completely empty," Matt Reardon mused to Blake after they had learned about Dinah's departure from their spouses.) But since Dinah was an adult, neither one of them could do anything about what Vanessa termed Dinah's "latest flight of fancy." The one thing Vanessa and Ross were both happy about, though, was that Dinah asked Ross to file for divorce for her, and said she would be in touch in a few days to go over the details with him. They didn't know half of what she was really up to, but they were at least grateful and happy that she was finally ending her marriage to Roger.

Dinah opted not to tell Ross that she (and Hart) had had Roger committed (well, they *_thought_* they had). She only gave Ross the address of the hospital in Bay City, and told him to send the papers there to Roger in care of John Hudson, omitting the fact that John was a doctor and that the address was that of Bay City General Hospital. As she told Hart once they were on the plane to the Caymans, "That'll just get Blake involved, spouting off about how dare I, the bitch, commit her father to a psych ward, and for all we know, she'll drag Holly into it, probably trying to push Holly and Roger back together again since Holly left Fletcher Reade. We certainly don't need Blake or Holly mixed up in this." Hart agreed with that, but privately wondered if they really would be able to keep Blake and Holly out of it; Roger was never going to get over Holly, and now that she was available again, Hart figured Roger would go back after her the first chance he had...if he hadn't already made some kind of overture to her. But he tried to push it out of his mind and focus on Dinah and the fact that they were going to the Cayman Islands, where they would be getting quite a windfall when they reclaimed the full amount of Dinah's trust fund from the bank account Roger had down there, and having some long-overdue and much-deserved fun after all the months of stress and strain in Springfield gaslighting Roger and carrying on their affair with each other behind Roger's back.

Blake, of course, knew that Dinah was having an affair with Hart, and, having heard the rumors around town all spring and summer that her father's sanity was supposedly slipping and having heard Roger tell Holly on the phone the night before that he had stayed at the hospital until he was sure Dinah and Hart had left, she correctly deduced that Dinah and Hart had teamed up to convince Roger that he needed a stay in a mental hospital, and Roger was letting them think that's what he was up to, but since he and Holly had talked about The Bayshore and seeing each other there, she knew that her father wasn't really a mental patient, he was only letting Dinah and Hart think that he was, and clearly her mother was in on this plan of his as well. But Blake kept all of this information to herself, not wanting to do anything to jeopardize her parents' fledgling fresh start with one another.

But Blake wondered who these other people were that her parents had discussed. The one full name she had was Cass Winthrop, her mother's divorce lawyer, who lived in Bay City, so she started there. Her research yielded the facts that Cass was a member in good standing of the Bar Association, and was married to Mary Frances Frame, a private investigator. Mary Frances...Frankie was a nickname for Mary Frances, right? And she was a private investigator. Roger had said that Frankie had played a tape for him. Of course! Roger had obviously hired Frankie to follow Dinah and Hart, probably to get proof of their affair. She wondered idly if Frankie had gotten the necessary proof, and if Roger would use it in the divorce that Dinah had now filed for, then decided that was secondary; he and Dinah were getting divorced, and he and Holly were getting closer, and that was what was most important.

Looking through back issues of _The Bay City Herald _at the Springfield Public Library put Blake on the trail of the mysterious Michael and Donna. When she came across a wedding announcement from the previous October for one Victoria Hudson, daughter of Donna Love and Michael Hudson, and Ryan Harrison, stepson of Rachel Cory, all of Bay City, she followed her hunch, and then hit the jackpot when she began looking for information on Michael Hudson, including a photograph of the man himself.

Michael Hudson looked to be around her father's age, and was the CEO and President of Hudson Enterprises. That sent Blake looking through the business sections of the _Herald_, and she learned, to her great surprise, that in the last two months, Michael Hudson had hired Roger to work at Hudson Enterprises and they had just closed a major deal having something to do with computers and something called the Internet with a company called Yahoo. Roger was listed as Executive Vice President of Internet Acquisitions of Hudson Enterprises._ At least he's out of Spaulding. That can only be a good thing,_ Blake mused to herself.

She got an even bigger surprise when she saw an item in the _Herald_'s business section dated a few weeks after the announcement about Yahoo and Hudson Enterprises mentioning Roger that declared that Holly Lindsey, the former co-owner of WSPR in Springfield, had bought Bay City TV station KBAY from Rachel Cory. _No wonder Mom and Dad haven't been around much. Between getting closer and launching new careers in Bay City, they don't have time,_ she thought.

The final mystery was solved for Blake when she called The Bayshore Hotel and learned from a friendly concierge named Ned that Ms. Holly Lindsey and Mr. Roger Thorpe were registered as guests at the hotel...though he hastened to point out that they maintained separate rooms, albeit on the same floor._ Well, the last time they were actually together, they started out in separate bedrooms across the hall from each other,_ she mused. _But this time, it's going to have a better ending. It's **got** to have a better ending this time. Ideally, it will have **no** ending for at least the next 30 or 40 years._

With the other people her parents had mentioned identified to her satisfaction, Blake turned her thoughts completely to her parents. Roger and Holly were building new lives for themselves in Bay City, and at the same time conscientiously working together to find a way to build a new life as a couple. Holly's divorce from Fletcher would be final any day now, and Dinah had finally filed for divorce from Roger. And once their divorces were final...

It was no secret to anyone in Springfield that Blake was the one and only person (with the possible exception of Michelle Bauer, whose opinion wasn't given much weight because she was in her early teens and didn't know Roger and Holly's whole history, which she knew Ed strongly believed would change Michelle's mind once she _**did** _know it) who believed that her parents belonged together, who saw that they truly did love each other, who knew deep in her soul that they had the potential to get it right with each other.

But they weren't in Springfield now, surrounded by the whispers and stares and blatant disapproval and judgment of everyone but her. And they were_** really trying** _this time; Blake knew without having to be told that her parents were more serious about getting it right with each other now than they had ever been before. Roger had given up Spaulding. This job with Hudson Enterprises was a heavy-duty, major-league, permanent corporate position. She knew her father well enough to know that he wouldn't go into this kind of job half-heartedly. This wasn't some kind of distraction until he could figure out his next ploy to try and steal Spaulding from the Spauldings. Roger was working at Hudson Enterprises because that's what he wanted to be doing.

And then there was the matter of those wedding rings Holly had bought at the end of May...**_after_** she had decided to divorce Fletcher, if not after she had filed, and those rings were meant for her and Roger. And given Holly's own marital history, and the disaster (and that was putting it mildly) that had been Holly and Roger's first marriage to each other, buying them and having them engraved was not an impulsive move on her part. No, she bought those rings and had them engraved because she wanted to marry Roger, which was not a decision that Holly would have made lightly or without knowing as certainly as she possibly could that it was absolutely what she wanted above all else.

Her mother and father didn't want her to know about them until they had something definite to tell her, and this time, Blake would respect their wishes. She wouldn't push, she wouldn't get involved at all, she would root for them silently from the sidelines and not breathe a word of this to anyone in Springfield; she already knew how they would all react, anyway. Blake was a gambler, like her father, and this time, she was betting on her parents to get it right, to make it work, to make it last the rest of their lives. The lack of interference of every kind could only be a good thing for them. So Blake would stay out of it until her parents chose to include her, hoping and praying all the while that Bay City was a kinder place to them than Springfield had ever been.

With Dinah and Hart out of the country, and Frankie keeping a close eye on them, Roger and Holly were free to concentrate on other things. Holly began going into KBAY for a few hours each workday, learning all she could about the station, and going over things with both Rachel and Matthew Cory. Matthew was the polar opposite of his sister Amanda, a levelheaded young man, with a bit of a rebellious streak evidenced by his long blond ponytail, intelligent, well-mannered, and very down to earth. Holly knew by the slight shadow in his eyes and his smile that he was lonely, and she hoped that he would find a woman worthy of him someday soon.

While Holly was getting her feet wet at KBAY, Roger was working with Michael at Hudson Enterprises. He now had his own office, on the same floor as Michael's. It wasn't as big or fancy as Michael's, but Roger found that he didn't care about having a fancy, showy office this time. It was enough for him to be working in the milieu at which he had always excelled, but this time with the added bonus of working with an old friend of his, because Michael Hudson was one of the few people in Roger's life that he had ever trusted consistently and implicitly. He and Michael had always been a great team, and being able to put their unique chemistry, their combined brain power, and all of their skills into business was yielding successes the likes of which Roger had never known before. And without the Spaulding name or its taint on anything, Roger felt like his part in their work was exactly that: _**his**_ part, and as on their CIA missions, he didn't mind at all sharing the glory with Michael. If anything, he got more credit for his work now than he had in the CIA, whose very nature was covert and secretive.

Most importantly, Roger and Holly were able to spend more time together, and also more time with their friends. Roger saw plenty of Michael outside of work as well as at work, and he and Holly had dinner with Michael and Donna a few times. Holly also spent time with Rachel unrelated to the sale of KBAY, and went on a few more shopping trips with Donna, plus had dinner at Rachel's house, which was actually a mansion, and saw Rachel's art studio and some of the pieces she was hard at work on for her upcoming showing in December. ("Iris's son Dennis owns the gallery. I figure just this once, since I've been away from it so long, nepotism is excusable," Rachel said. Rachel also shared the facts of what Donna had referred to as Rachel "valiantly throwing herself on Mitch Blake's penis" to find out where Janice Frame had taken Mac to finish him off when Janice was married to him and trying to kill him for his money. "I was so desperate to save Mac's life and that was my only option to get answers," Rachel said. "What happened afterward was my fault, my mistake, my throwing over the absolute right man for the absolute wrong man, as you put it." But Holly completely understood Rachel's desperation, and confided that if she were in a similar position and there was no other way for her to save Roger's life, then she would do exactly what Rachel had done to save Mac...and Rachel _**had**_ saved Mac, which was what ultimately mattered.)

They had lots of lunches and dinners together just the two of them, saw a few old movies at the revival house that Rachel mentioned to Holly, and then there was the little blues club, The Pelican, that Holly found and took Roger to for a live performance one night.

It was on a Thursday afternoon three weeks after Dinah and Hart left for the Cayman Islands that Roger played hooky from work, convinced Holly to join him (not that he had to work too hard at that), and surprised her by taking her rowing in the park. The bay for which Bay City was named was large, and besides encompassing the whole waterfront area, Bay View Park rented rowboats, so Roger rented one for himself and Holly to go out on the water.

"Are you sure you know what you're doing?" she asked when she was seated safely in the boat, which was on the edge of the shore.

"Of course I know what I'm doing," Roger replied. "It's true that I've never taken you rowing before, but I think I can handle a rowboat."

"You fell in the water trying to catch a fish in Acapulco," she reminded him as he gingerly climbed into the slightly swaying boat.

"I didn't have a fishing pole," Roger said. "I have two oars right here," he gestured to the oars that were fitted into the oarlocks on either side of the small craft. "Nobody's getting wet today." Roger pushed the boat further into the bay and then jumped athletically into the boat himself, grabbing the oars and propelling the boat out into the middle of the bay. He grinned triumphantly at Holly as he rowed.

She just grinned back. "Showoff," she said affectionately.

"For you, absolutely," Roger replied. They passed by the dock now, and they both noticed the flurry of activity going on there, the preparations for a big party, which they both knew about, Roger having heard about it from Michael, and Holly having heard about it from Rachel.

They spoke at the same time.

"So-" Roger began.

"I wanted to-" Holly said.

They broke off laughing. "You wanted to what?" Roger asked.

"You first," Holly said.

"Are you sure?" Roger asked.

"Yes," Holly replied. "Go ahead."

"Okay," Roger said. He inclined his head toward the setup on the dock. "You see all those people over there, with the lanterns and the strings of lights and the decorations and tables and all?"

"Yes?"

"Well, there's going to be a dock party there tomorrow night," Roger continued. "It's a fundraiser for The Waterfront Clinic, and it's open to the public."

Holly smiled. "The couple that runs the clinic, Jamie and Marley Frame, hold this dock party fundraiser every year at the end of August," she said.

"You know about it?" Roger asked, surprised.

"Rachel told me. Jamie and Marley are her son and daughter-in-law. I was going to ask you if you wanted to go with me," she said.

"Marley is one of Michael and Donna's daughters. Michael told me about it. I was going to ask you if you wanted to go with me," he said. "So is that a yes?"

"Yes," Holly said with a smile. "I would love to go to the dock party with you, Roger."

"Great," Roger said with a pleased smile. "It starts tomorrow night at 8:00. You want to get dinner beforehand?"

"Sure," Holly agreed.

"Did you ever get that mess straightened out at the station?" Roger asked as they drifted past the activity on the dock.

"Yeah, finally," Holly replied. "Matthew was a big help, and I met his sister...stepsister? I don't know, they don't really consider themselves step-siblings or half-siblings in Rachel's family from what I've gathered. Anyway, his sister Paulina that's on maternity leave, she's coming back to work in a couple of weeks, and she had the answer, so she came in yesterday and we met and she had the answer we were looking for. Matthew's eager to get going at the newspaper, so the sooner we can get all of the 'i's dotted and 't's crossed, the sooner I can officially take over at KBAY and he can start at the _Herald_. I was kind of nervous about starting full-time at the station, but Paulina is really good at her job and I think we're going to work well together. She'll be a big help to me as I get used to working in television again."

"You're gonna be great," Roger assured Holly.

"You're doing great yourself at Hudson," Holly said.

"I think Yahoo's going to go public by the end of the year," Roger said.

"Really? That's amazing!" Holly said.

"The amazing part is that Michael and I pulled this off together," Roger said.

"The Black Fox and Rotorhead ride again?" Holly asked.

"Exactly," Roger said. "Only this time, neither of us is in mortal danger, and international security isn't at stake. And it's really different, working with somebody that I have such faith in, somebody that I know isn't going to screw me over at any point."

"You're different," Holly said.

"You noticed," Roger said happily.

"Oh yes," Holly replied.

Roger stopped rowing, resting the oars in the oarlocks and his hands on the oar handles, letting them drift again. "I_** am** _different," he agreed. "Trust can't be a one-way street. I'm learning to trust you again, but you have to be able to trust me again, too, if we're going to work this time." His face clouded now, but he held her gaze as he continued. "All the times I went after Spaulding, what was I really going after? Money...power...the ability to stick it to Alexandra and Alan the best way I knew how. And what did it ever really get me? Nothing but grief. Alex tried to send me to jail more than once...Alan tried to kill our daughter...and I was so blinded by the pursuit of Spaulding that I let it destroy us. I didn't show you that you come first with me, and I lost you, and I should have, because you deserved so much better."

Now he gave her a look of determination. "But I'm never going to let that happen again. I swear it on my life, Holly. Yes, I like working. I like big business, and I'm just arrogant enough to think I'm good at it. But I'm learning a lot from Michael about balancing work with the rest of your life. He has Donna, their daughters, their grandsons, his brother and his family, and his mom's still alive too. And he doesn't let any of them suffer to further his career. That doesn't mean he never works late, or that work doesn't occasionally have to have all of his attention and most of his time, but Donna and his family know that they come first with him always."

He let one of the oars rest in its oarlock and reached across the boat for Holly's hand. When he was holding her hand in both of his, he said, "I know this is going to sound like something out of some cheesy romance novel, but it's the God's honest truth. You make me want to be the best man I can, because I want to be what you deserve. I don't ever want you to think for one moment that you are not the most important thing in my life, Holly, because you are. And I want to keep getting closer to you, and I want us to keep building trust in each other, so that this time, we do make it, because that's what I want the most, what I've always wanted the most: to have a good life with you."

"Oh, Roger," Holly said softly. Unfortunately, as she shifted to move closer to him, her knee bumped the oarlock, and the oar wasn't securely in the oarlock, so it fell into the water with a splash. "Oops," she said.

Roger reluctantly let go of her hand. "Hold that thought," he said. "I'll be right back."

He then stood up in the boat and leaned out over the water, looking for the oar. The boat was pitching far too much to the right side. "Roger, wait-" Holly started to say. But before she could finish her thought, Roger lost his balance reaching for the oar, and with the boat pitching so far to the right, when he lost his balance, he fell out of the boat and landed in the water with a huge splash. "Oh no!" she said, trying not to laugh. Once Roger was out of the boat, since Holly had remained seated the whole time, the boat righted itself. Roger came up spluttering, soaked from head to toe.

Holly put a hand to her mouth to cover her amusement, but Roger could see the laughter dancing in her eyes. "'Roger, wait' what?" he asked.

Holly removed her hand from her mouth, cleared her throat, and said, "You're not supposed to stand up and lean over in a boat on the water. It's too easy to lose your balance and fall into the water." She pulled him back aboard the boat. "I'm so sorry I bumped the oar into the water."

"It was an accident," Roger said. He had made a large puddle in the bottom of the boat, his hair was plastered to his scalp, and he was soaked to the skin. "I'm the one who fell in the water. So much for romance," he added ruefully.

"It's still romantic," Holly said. She saw the oar floating next to the boat, reached out, and effortlessly plucked it from the water and back into the boat.

"Now who's showing off?" Roger asked, but Holly could see that he was amused too.

"What, I can't show off for my guy?" Holly asked as she fitted the oar back into the oarlock. "Equal opportunity wooing, remember?"

"Oh yeah, honey, the way you just pulled that oar out of the water and slotted it back in the oarlock is really attractive," Roger said.

Holly pulled a face and then said, "Let's get back to shore. You have to get into some dry clothes before you catch a cold."

"Well, if I do catch a cold, luckily I know someone who would make an excellent nurse," Roger replied as he began rowing them back to shore.

"Complete with uniform, no doubt," Holly bantered back.

Roger just smiled mischievously.

The next night, Roger, in a summer weight black jacket over a short-sleeved white button-down shirt, khakis, and loafers, was standing at the door of Holly's suite promptly at 7. She answered his knock with a radiant smile, her hair in an upsweep off her shoulders, wearing a white dress with a blue floral print and spaghetti straps and matching white strappy sandals. "Hi," she said happily.

"Hi," Roger replied. "Are you ready to go?"

"Actually, if you have a minute, could you come in? There's something I want to show you," Holly replied.

"I know it's not your etchings," Roger quipped as he entered her suite.

Holly walked over to the desk in the corner and picked up some papers, then returned to him, holding them up. "I got these a little while ago," she said, and her smile grew both wider and more radiant. "I am officially and legally divorced from Fletcher!"

Holly saw Roger's Adam's apple convulse when he swallowed hard in reaction to this news, and she saw the smile that twitched at the corners of his mouth before it burst fully formed onto his face. "That's excellent news," he said.

"Yes, it is," she replied as she returned the papers to the desk.

Roger's thoughts were in a whirlwind. Part of him wanted to grab Holly, pull her to him, and fuse his mouth to hers, preferably for the rest of their lives, separating just often enough to take the necessary quick breaths to sustain their beings. The news that she was officially free, no longer married to Fletcher, to anyone, and that she wanted to be with him-and his persistent hope that he might, eventually, someday be able to get her to agree to marry him (the morning after they made love at Cliff House, she said no; the afternoon two years ago he had told the door she had slammed in his face that he wanted to marry her, she had said not yet; the third time is the charm, isn't that what they say?)-affected him so deeply that no words in any language of the world could begin to express just how much these facts truly meant to him.

But he didn't trust himself to stop at kissing her, and as much as he loved her, as much as he wanted her, as much as he wanted to make love with her, he wanted absolutely nothing and no one standing in their way when they did come together again, including themselves. He trusted her more now than he had in almost two years, but, as strange as it might seem, as difficult as it might be to try to explain, he wasn't all the way there yet. He didn't doubt that she loved him and wanted to be with him, but he had to be completely certain that she didn't just mean it for the present, or for an indefinite period of time. He and Holly had had the tendency in the past to focus on the physical, which was always amazing and fulfilling on a physical level, but Roger wanted more than that from Holly now. He wanted it all-the physical, the emotional, a true commitment to one another in every way and on every level imaginable. He had told her the morning after Valentine's Day two years ago that he had promised himself after their night at Cliff House that if they ever made love again, the next time, he would settle for no less than all of her. And at the time, he had thought, they had both thought, that he had it, but he didn't, because if he had, they wouldn't have imploded less than a year later. This time, Roger was sticking to that promise he'd made himself after the night at Cliff House: this time, he would, under no circumstances, settle for less than all of Holly, for that was really what he was waiting to be able to trust. He wanted, needed, to be able to trust that she trusted him enough to give all of herself to him freely and willingly for the rest of their lives, because he was determined this time to give Holly all of himself freely and willingly for the rest of their lives, with no secrets, no lies, no questions.

Every time he had had any semblance of a chance with Holly in the past, he, they, had always somehow blown it. He refused to let that happen this time. This was too important. She, and this precious chance to finally, after all this time, make a life with her that would not collapse in on itself like a house of cards because he once again drove her away through his own recklessness, stupidity, lack of trust, lack of commitment, failure to let her know that she and their relationship were his top priority. That meant no rushing, no repeating past mistakes, and doing everything in his power to make sure that he and Holly really would be together for the rest of their lives this time, because the mere thought of falling asleep beside her every night and waking up with her every morning made his heart race every time it crossed his mind. What he wanted most of all was to belong to Holly, and know that she belonged to him, utterly, completely, and irrevocably.

"Then we have a lot to celebrate," Roger said. He held out his arm to Holly. "Shall we?"

"Yes," Holly replied, picking up her small white beaded clutch bag, and linking her arm through his.

Their conversation was light on the drive to the restaurant, through their quick bite of dinner, and then on the drive to the dock party. Holly had her own whirlwind of thoughts running through her mind.

A part of her wanted to kiss Roger senseless (which she knew she was capable of doing very successfully), to melt into his arms, into him. The chemistry between them had always burned hot and brightly, gaining in intensity as they got older. She loved him in a way that she could and would never love any other man, and while Roger was setting a world record for greatest number of cold showers, Holly was setting her own world record, for greatest number of erotic dreams featuring the same man. She wanted to make love with Roger, consciously, subconsciously, every waking hour and most of her sleeping ones.

But forgetting everything else and making love before they were truly ready to do so on every level was a mistake she and Roger had made too many times in the past, and Holly was bound and determined that that was one mistake they would never make again. It hurt too much when everything blew up once the afterglow had faded.

Trust was always such a dicey proposition for them, but in order for their relationship to work the way they both wanted it to this time, trust was an absolutely necessary component. Without it, they would only be marking time until the next disastrous end, and Holly had vowed to herself that that would never happen again. No, she and Roger would not implode again, they would not end this time. And she knew how deeply she had wounded Roger, turning to Fletcher the way she did, going as far as marrying him. That was her pattern: Roger made her angry, hurt her, betrayed her, she fell into the arms of the nearest available "good" man and then twisted herself up in knots trying to be the "good" man's ideal woman. No more.

Holly was doing everything she could to show Roger how serious and how honest she was this time about wanting only him for the rest of their lives. Yes, she wanted to make love with him outside of her increasingly fevered dreams. But this was about so much more than sex. Roger was the half that made her whole; it was true when she nineteen, and it was even more true now. She wasn't scared of the intensity of her love for him anymore. She was finally fully embracing the fact that Roger, above all others, was her soulmate, her home, where she belonged. They had lost and wasted enough time apart, they had hurt each other in the cruelest, most violent ways possible, but her life was hollow and spiritless without him.

She was no longer a starry-eyed nineteen-year-old. She knew Roger now-his faults, his failings, his fears, and his heart-and he knew hers. Love, relationships, marriage, they all took work and commitment. And Holly was no longer afraid or unwilling to work at her relationship with Roger, because she knew to the depths of her soul that they could have something amazing together this time if they did the work and made the commitment, if their love had a strong foundation of trust and openness.

She was ready to give all of herself to Roger. He had told her the last time they had been together that after their night at Cliff House, he had promised himself that if they ever made love again after that, he would settle for no less than all of her. At the time, she had believed she had given him that, but she knew now that she hadn't, just as he hadn't given her all of himself. But they had grown and changed after losing each other two years ago. They knew themselves and knew each other better now than they ever had before. What they felt for one another, what they could be together, was too strong, too intense, too profound to be denied or ignored. And they were getting closer every day to finally getting everything right. The fact that her divorce from Fletcher was final and legal was the latest step in that direction.

So there would be no rushing into bed with Roger, no ignoring or putting aside trust or any other issues to get lost in each other's arms. Holly had goals and plans for the rest of her life, and the biggest and most important one was her living that life by Roger's side, eventually as his wife. She saw the changes in him, and in herself. They were learning how to put each other first. They were realizing that sometimes life really was simple, especially when you left behind the scene of nearly all of the complications that had plagued you for years. They were finding out what they needed and what they didn't, and finally fully realizing how important each of them was to the other's life and happiness.

For all that they already were, for all that they had yet to become, and for every bit of hope in every corner of her heart and soul that she would spend the rest of her days, and nights, by Roger's side, making a life with him, Holly would take her time, she would not rush him or push him, she would give all of herself to him and accept all of him in return, and the day would come that she would at last belong to Roger, and he would belong to her, in every way and for the rest of their lives.

The sun was just setting when Roger and Holly arrived at the dock party, music, laughter, and the buzz of multiple conversations wafted on the slight evening breeze, which had the first hint of autumn in it. The temperature was balmy but comfortable, the full moon was just beginning to rise, and a handful of stars winked in the darkening sky, gradually becoming visible as the shadows lengthened.

No one was yet on the dance floor when they arrived, but music was already playing in the background. As they walked along the dock arm in arm, taking in the party's atmosphere, they suddenly heard Michael Hudson calling, "Roger! Holly! Over here!" They both looked in the direction of Michael's voice and found him holding court at a table with Donna, Ryan, a thirtyish blonde woman that must have been their daughter, Ryan's wife, Victoria, and a man that Roger recognized as John Hudson, who had his arm around a blonde woman his own age.

When Roger and Holly approached the table, the young blonde woman spoke first. "You must be Roger Thorpe," she said with a friendly, interested smile at Roger. "I've been dying to meet you. Victoria Harrison." She extended her hand.

"Michael and Donna's daughter," Roger said, shaking hands with her.

"One of them, yeah. My sister is around here somewhere, hostessing," she said. Then Vicky looked at Holly. "I can see why you rebuffed Amanda's advances," she said, glancing back at Roger with an approving nod before returning her gaze to Holly. "So you're the one who got arrested at my dad's office with my mother," she said.

"Vicky, I didn't actually arrest them," Ryan reminded her, shooting Holly an apologetic glance. "I just took them back to The Bayshore."

"Holly Lindsey," Holly said, shaking Vicky's hand, "and guilty on both counts, I'm afraid."

"Victoria, really," Donna said, exasperatedly. "How long are you going to torment me about this?"

Vicky's gleeful laughter was a rich, joyous sound. "Are you kidding?" she said. "I've been waiting years for something like this! The publicly prim and proper Donna Love staging a drunken midnight raid on her lover's office."

"I was trying to help Holly do something romantic for Roger," Donna replied.

"And yet _**you**_ were the one goosing your man and suggesting that the two of you go home and play Double Oh Seven and Horny Bond Girl," Vicky continued.

"Ryan!" Donna exclaimed, embarrassed, as she glared at her son-in-law.

Ryan looked chagrined. "I didn't want to be the only one with that image in my head," he said in his own defense, "but Vicky didn't have the same reaction I did, obviously. I should have known that she wouldn't."

"I forgive you," Michael told Ryan in an aside. "I understand. Believe me, I understand what you were trying to do."

Holly looked at Roger and could tell that he was thinking the same thing she was: Vicky Hudson Harrison reminded both of them of Blake.

"John, good to see you again," Roger said, turning his attention then to John Hudson. Roger introduced John to Holly, and John, in turn, introduced both Roger and Holly to his wife Sharlene.

"I'm glad that we're able to help you fight against your son and your future ex-wife trying to gaslight you," Sharlene said. At Roger's surprised look, Sharlene said, "I'm very discreet, Mr. Thorpe. I'm also the head of administration at Bay City General, so I've known what was going on from the first time Michael mentioned it to John a few months ago." Sharlene looked at John then, and he took her hand in his. "Having someone you're supposed to be able to trust and depend on playing with your sanity is a horrendous experience for anyone to go through, so whatever we can do to help you fight this, we're happy to help."

"So am I," Roger said. He sensed that John and Sharlene Hudson had a story of their own about someone playing with the sanity of one of them, and he was struck, not for the first time, by the understanding, the willingness to help, the **_support _**of these people; with the exception of Michael, none of the rest of them knew him. This was all so new to him, not being reviled on sight by everyone whose path he crossed, having people there he could turn to for help instead of having to handle his current problems alone. He had never really thought it possible for him to have a clean slate in life, but somehow, perhaps because he wasn't actively looking for it or trying to force it, he had found one in Bay City. Not only had he found Michael Hudson, the one true friend he'd ever had in his life, here again, he had this clean slate, and most importantly of all, he had this precious chance to get it right with Holly at last. He could easily, happily see himself staying here in Bay City for the rest of his life, if Holly would stay too.

"Good evening, everyone," Rachel Cory piped up from behind them then.

Ryan smiled and rounded the table to greet his stepmother with a quick hug and a kiss on the cheek. "Rachel," he said happily. "Are you here alone?"

Rachel's motherly gesture of brushing her hand down the back of Ryan's head and then squeezing his shoulder showed the deep, easy affection between them, the son who chose her to be his mother and the mother who opened her heart to a son whose mother and two fathers left him a virtual orphan because of their own sociopathic and criminal behaviors. "No, Matthew is escorting me," she replied. "Jamie asked Matthew to help him with something. He'll be along in a minute. You look lovely, Vicky."

"Thanks, so do you," Vicky replied.

Rachel greeted John Hudson and his wife Sharlene, Michael, gave a terse but polite hello to Donna, which Donna returned, and then beamed at Holly and Roger. "Holly, Roger, I'm so glad you're here!" Rachel said warmly, patting Roger on the back and hugging Holly.

"We wouldn't have missed it," Holly said, looking at Roger. Everyone noticed the look they exchanged, a look that did nothing to disguise their true feelings for one another.

"Hello, everyone." Marley Hudson Frame, one hand linked through her husband Dr. Jamie Frame's arm, the other arm through the arm of her brother-in-law Matthew Cory spoke then, breaking the spell, wondering about the couple most of the rest of her family was watching gaze at each other with a palpable love and longing. Everyone's attention snapped to the trio, the couple lost in each other's eyes noticing them last. Greetings were exchanged, and Donna and Rachel comically, to the others anyway, talked over each other in their eager haste to introduce Jamie and Marley to Holly and Roger.

"You must be something special," Jamie said to Holly as he clasped her outstretched hand with a twinkle in his eye that was amusement but which Roger, realizing that young Dr. Frame was Amanda Cory's brother, wondered was a sign that Jamie was flirting with Holly. "I've never even seen Mom and Donna fight over our kids like this."

"She is," Roger said, putting his arm around Holly's shoulders and giving the young doctor a look that clearly said, _She's with me. _Holly knew that Jamie Frame wasn't flirting with her, but she didn't mind at all that Roger put his arm around her shoulders. Jamie figured that Roger was giving him that look partly because he was Amanda's brother, and he also knew, as did his wife Marley, that he wasn't flirting with Holly, either.

Marley, who was the spitting image of Vicky but for a small mole on her lower left jaw and her blonde hair being pulled back in a chic ponytail where Vicky's fell loosely to her shoulders, smiled kindly at Holly and Roger. "We've heard so much about you both from Donna and Michael," she said. "It's so nice to finally be able to put faces to the names."

"Thank God Amanda went back to Europe yesterday, or we might have a worse floor show this year than we did last year," Vicky said then.

"Victoria," Michael said, a warning note in his voice.

"Oh, there wouldn't have been a repeat of last year's floor show," Jamie said then. "The DJ has been given strict instructions not to play 'I Touch Myself' this year, or he'll never work in this state again."

Ryan changed the subject then by turning to Roger and saying, "So, Roger, you and Michael were in the CIA together."

"That's right," Roger said.

"Ever kill anyone?" Vicky wanted to know.

"You'll have to excuse my sister," Marley piped up then. "She is not known for her subtlety."

Vicky cocked her head then and listened to the music for a minute. "Oh, listen, they're playing yours and Jamie's song, Marley: 'Hip to Be Square.'"

"Girls, play nicely," Donna said.

"Oh, come on, Mom, Holly didn't ditch you as a friend after you nearly got her arrested, she's not going to bail on you because she's met me," Vicky retorted.

Holly couldn't help laughing then. "Vicky, you are a force of nature," she said.

Vicky looked at Holly, bemused. "Is that a compliment?" she asked.

"One of the highest I can pay," Holly replied.

Vicky fell silent, the look on her face a mixture of embarrassment and pleasure.

"Are you blushing?" Ryan asked his wife, surprised.

"No," Vicky murmured.

Ryan peered at Vicky intently then. "You are!" he realized.

"Ms. Lindsey, you've just done the impossible," Marley announced then. "You complimented Vicky into silence."

"And none of us brought our video cameras," Sharlene quipped.

The music started then and Ryan immediately took charge, knowing that Vicky would want to be away from everyone else while she recovered from the unexpected compliment she had just received from Holly, by taking her hand, saying, "Excuse us, everyone. I want to dance with my wife. We'll catch up with all of you later," and then leading Vicky to the dance floor.

Jamie spotted some members of the hospital board then, and he and Marley excused themselves to go and talk to them. John and Sharlene joined Ryan and Vicky on the dance floor, Rachel spotted her friend Felicia Gallant and excused herself to go and say hello, and Donna, realizing that Michael and Matthew were both there, suggested to Michael that they go and get a drink. "That sounds like a good idea," Michael agreed, and they excused themselves.

Matthew smiled ruefully after Michael and Donna excused themselves. "I'm not sure if it's ego or guilt that makes Donna think I'm not over her yet," he mused, "but I am, I swear. That's how I know she really wasn't the one for me. If she was, I never would have gotten over her." He gestured to himself and addressed Roger then. "Matthew Cory, though I'm sure you've heard about me, since you're such good friends with Michael."

"Roger Thorpe," Roger replied.

"Nice to meet you," Matthew said. "I had the opposite problem as Vicky and Marley: I've seen your face, but I didn't have a name to put with it until tonight."

"You've seen my face?" Roger asked, his heart skipping a beat. _He works at the TV station,_ Roger thought grimly._ I don't even want to think about everything he has access to, or where and in what context he could have seen my face._

"Every time I go to Holly's office," Matthew continued. "She has your picture on the corner of her desk, right next to the picture of your daughter and son-in-law and grandsons. At least, I'm guessing Blake is your daughter too?"

"She is," Roger said. He looked from Matthew to Holly and back to Matthew. "Holly has my picture on her desk?" he asked interestedly. He hadn't known this.

Before Matthew could answer Roger, Michael and Donna returned from their trip to get drinks. "Well, I should probably catch up with my family. Almost everyone is here tonight. Excuse me. Roger, nice meeting you. Holly, I'll see you at the station on Monday," Matthew said, beating a hasty retreat.

"It's too bad Amanda doesn't have Matthew's dedication to not making scenes," Donna remarked. "But at least you won't have to worry about her stalking you tonight."

The distinctive guitar, bass, hand claps, and tambourine intro of Van Morrison's "Brown-Eyed Girl" floated across the air then, and Michael, after taking a sip of his drink, exclaimed, "Now this is more like it!" In two smooth, swift moves, he had plucked Donna's glass from her hand, set both their drinks on the nearby table, and swept Donna onto the dance floor.

Alone together again, Roger looked at Holly with a cocky grin. "So I have your picture on my desk at work," Holly said. "You don't have to look so smug about it."

"Me, smug?" Roger asked, resting one hand over his heart and affecting a look of innocence that made Holly laugh out loud. Seeing her laugh, Roger's grin was no longer cocky, merely happy. "May I have this dance?" he asked.

"Yes," she agreed. He took his hand from his chest and held it out to Holly, she took it, and they headed to the dance floor. As Van Morrison went into his first chorus of "sha la la la la la la la la la la te dah"s, Roger pulled Holly into his arms, then spun her out from him before pulling her close to him again, and they danced, spun, and even, by silent agreement, went into the Twist together for a few seconds before Holly caught hold of Roger's hand and ducked under his arm, then circled around him before he caught hold of her hand again and pulled her back into his arms, both of them laughing as they got caught up in the happy, uptempo spirit of the song.

The end of "Brown-Eyed Girl" faded into the start of the next song, a slow number with a sultry guitar-and-saxophone intro. When the slow song began, one of Holly's hands was resting on Roger's shoulder, and his arm was loosely around her waist. He tightened his hold around her waist slightly, resting his hand at the small of her back. She tightened her hold on his shoulder, and her free hand found his free hand, their fingers intertwining of their own accord. Gazing into each other's eyes, they slowly began to sway as the song's words joined its music.

_"The strands in your eyes that color them wonderful_

_Stop me and steal my breath_

_And emeralds from mountains thrust towards the sky_

_Never revealing their depth"_

Roger and Holly subtly, almost imperceptibly, moved closer to each other as they danced. Though they were on a dance floor with several other couples, they only had eyes for each other.

_"And tell me that we belong together_

_Dress it up with the trappings of love_

_I'll be captivated, I'll hang from your lips_

_Instead of the gallows of heartache that hang from above"_

How many times had each of them consigned the other, and in so doing themselves as well, to the gallows of heartache? They were a lot happier now that they were both out of the gallows of heartache...specifically, now that they had released one another from the gallows of heartache and were, for the first time in their lives, taking the time and care to build the kind of relationship with one another that each of them had always wanted.

Holly's hand moved from Roger's shoulder to rest on the back of his neck, her fingers lightly brushing the hair at his nape. Roger rested their intertwined hands over his heart as they moved even closer together, drowning in the feel of her so close in his arms, and of her fingers lightly, just barely stroking the back of his neck, and the look in her eyes would have knocked Roger off his feet had he not been holding onto her, a look of such wistful and profound love, of a yearning both satisfied and multiplied, leaving no doubts at all that he was all she saw, and that in his arms was the only place she wanted to be.

Holly reveled in the fact that she was in Roger's arms, in her fingers laced through his, their joined hands resting over his heart, and in the way he was looking at her. She never had seen in anyone else's eyes what she saw in Roger's, and she had never before seen Roger look at her the way he was looking at her now, with such a depth of longing and a palpability of love that she had never seen in his eyes before.

_"And I'll be your crying shoulder,_

_I'll be love's suicide,_

_And I'll be better when I'm older,_

_I'll be the greatest fan of your life"_

They were older, and each of them was doing everything they could to be better than they had in the past. Each of them wanted to be the best version of themselves they had ever been. Neither Roger nor Holly had ever wanted to be together as much as they wanted to be together now, and if they could get it right this time, there would be no more love's suicide, no more gallows of heartache. Arguments, annoyances, little hurts, yes, of course; that's just human nature. But they both finally wanted to deal with all of the good and bad of life together, because they also had never wanted to get their relationship with each other right and make it last forever as much as they wanted to now.

For the first time, Roger and Holly both believed that they _**could**_ make it last forever this time.

_"And rain falls angry on the tin roof_

_As we lie awake in my bed_

_And you're my survival, you're my living proof_

_My love is alive and not dead"_

Unconsciously, their clasped hands over Roger's heart separated, and Holly's hand went to Roger's cheek, gently touching his face, while he wrapped both of his arms around her waist and pulled her even closer so that their bodies were touching, her chest pressed against his, the closest they had been physically in twenty months. Holly put both her arms around Roger's neck and rested her cheek on his shoulder, closing her eyes and just letting the powerful love and contentment she felt surge through her. Roger lightly rested his chin on the crown of Holly's head, closing his own eyes, as he savored the way Holly felt in his arms, and let the love and joy he felt engulf him completely as they moved ever so slowly in time with the song.

The two of them were now in their own world, where nothing and no one existed but the two of them in each other's arms, slow dancing, and the song.

_"And tell me that we belong together_

_Dress it up with the trappings of love_

_I'll be captivated, I'll hang from your lips_

_Instead of the gallows of heartache that hang from above"_

"Everyone keeps looking over here," Marley said to Jamie as they danced. "Do we need to be doing something other than dancing right now?"

"They're not looking at us," Jamie replied. He gave his head a quick jerk upward, so Marley looked over her shoulder, behind where she and Jamie were dancing, and saw her parents' friends Roger Thorpe and Holly Lindsey wrapped in each other's arms a few feet away, so close together that no space could be seen between them now.

"Way to go, Black Fox," Michael murmured when he saw them from his and Donna's place on the dance floor. Donna was so moved by Roger and Holly, tears were welling in her eyes.

Cass and Frankie had just arrived and they noticed that everyone was moving off the dance floor. "Surely the dancing isn't over already," Cass said. When Frankie stopped suddenly, he bumped into her.

"Everyone is just yielding the floor for the moment, Counselor," Frankie replied. Cass followed her gaze to Roger and Holly, and gave a low whistle.

"Now _**that** _is a floor show," Vicky said. She and Ryan were standing near where Cass and Frankie had stopped on the edge of the dance floor.

"It's a lot more than that, Vicky," Frankie said exasperatedly.

"It sure is," Ryan agreed.

"Well, you have to agree that it's a big improvement over Amanda fondling herself during her hoochie dance last year," Vicky retorted. "No one's disgusted right now."

"That's true," Cass said, and then the four of them fell silent like everyone else and watched Roger and Holly.

Rachel, seated at a table with Felicia Gallant and Matthew, who were talking quietly as Felicia caught Matthew up on the latest news from his friends, her youngest daughter Jenna and son-in-law Dean Frame, saw them too, and raised her glass in silent salute to Roger and Holly, and remembered when she had danced with her own beloved Mac that way.

_"And I'll be your crying shoulder,_

_I'll be love's suicide,_

_And I'll be better when I'm older,_

_I'll be the greatest fan of your life_

_"And I dropped out, I burned up, I fought my way back from the dead_

_I tuned in, I turned on, remembered the thing that you said"_

Holly lifted her head and met Roger's eyes. Her eyes flicked to his mouth for a few seconds, and when she looked at his eyes again, she saw that he was leaning his face towards hers. She stretched her neck just enough and closed her eyes, and Roger pulled in a breath and closed his eyes in the split second before his mouth found hers.

The kiss was tentative on both their parts at first, but the emotions swirling through both of them were too strong and intense for them to remain tentative for more than a few seconds. When Holly traced the seam of Roger's lips with her tongue, his mouth opened instinctively, and she slipped her tongue inside, gently probing, unable to hold back a soft moan when his tongue slid against hers. Roger then pulled Holly flush against him, one arm wrapped around her waist, the other hand splayed across the middle of her back. Holly's arms were wrapped around Roger's neck, one hand resting between his shoulder blades, as they continued exploring one another's mouths, the kiss growing in intensity and passion as they remained oblivious to everything and everyone but one another and their kiss.

_"And I'll be your crying shoulder,_

_I'll be love's suicide,_

_And I'll be better when I'm older,_

_I'll be the greatest fan of your_

_I'll be your crying shoulder,_

_I'll be love's suicide,_

_And I'll be better when I'm older,_

_I'll be the greatest fan of your life_

_The greatest fan of your life"_

The cocoon of their own making in which Roger and Holly were wrapped abruptly burst when the slow song faded into a loud, raucous rock number with a jangling electric guitar riff intro and the lead singer literally screaming at the top of his lungs, which had the effect of an electric shock on Roger and Holly, causing them to pull apart as if they had been caught (which, in a sense, they had, given that most of the people at the dock party were standing around the edges of the dance floor, watching them), their chests heaving as they panted, trying to catch their breath, their arms still around each other since they still stood about a foot-and-a-half from each other, looking at each other in a daze.

"Talk?" Roger managed to get out.

Holly nodded. "Yes," she said in a stage whisper. People had returned to the dance floor when the fast song started, bobbing and weaving as the singer sang about everybody needing to touch now and then and everybody wanting a good, good friend, and wanting to be closer to free. Roger scrubbed at his face with one hand, grabbed Holly by the hand with the other, and the two of them walked briskly off the dance floor.

"Well, somebody's getting some action tonight," Vicky remarked, fanning herself as she, Ryan, and the Winthrops watched Roger and Holly depart. Frankie, long accustomed to her best friend's wife's irreverence, merely rolled her eyes. Ryan looked at Frankie as if to say he agreed with her, but since he was going home with Vicky that night, wisely did not voice the thought.

"No," Cass said quietly.

"No?" Vicky asked incredulously. "Come on, Cass! It looks like she's about to mount him right out there in the middle of the dance floor."

"I'm not saying they don't want to," Cass replied evenly. "I'm saying they won't."

"I agree," Frankie said.

"I don't get it," Vicky said.

"They have a hell of a lot more at stake here than a roll in the hay," Frankie said.

Michael, Donna, and Rachel all saw Roger and Holly leave as well. Donna and Michael exchanged a look, each hoping that Roger and Holly could stick to their individual resolves not to sleep together until they were actually a couple again. Michael knew that Roger's divorce wasn't final yet, and after having heard the tape Frankie got of Dinah and Hart, he didn't trust either one of them not to royally smear Holly and Roger both if they gave in to their obvious love for one another before Dinah and Roger's divorce decree was final, and he didn't want that for them any more than Roger wanted it for Holly.

Rachel recalled the times in between their marriages that she and Mac had gone to bed together and then returned to their separate lives, feeling emptier and sadder than they had before going to bed together, and she too hoped that Roger and Holly could resist the temptation until they were ready to be a real couple again.

They were halfway through Bay View Park now, where they had gone rowing the day before, and Roger spied a park bench beneath a streetlight. Holly saw it at the same time and by silent agreement, they headed to the bench and sat down side by side, still holding hands, now breathing normally again.

"I didn't realize until now just how much I've missed kissing you," Holly said softly.

"I've missed kissing you too," Roger replied. He took a deep breath then, inhaling through his nose and exhaling through his mouth, then gestured to his lap, the corner of his mouth lifting in a rueful half-grimace. "I know you felt how much I want you," he said. Holly nodded once; indeed she had. Roger let go of Holly's hand and raked both hands through his hair, bowing his head for a moment. Then he lifted his head and met Holly's gaze again. "I'm trying to figure out how to say this so that I don't sound like a chintzy romance novel."

"I don't read romance novels, chintzy or otherwise," Holly said helpfully.

Roger smiled at this, so she smiled too. He reached for her hand again now, and she threaded her fingers through his. _A perfect fit_, they both thought.

"What we have is so much bigger than just the physical," Roger began. "And in the past, we've had the bad habit of putting everything else aside to...satisfy the physical urge, and it just never ends up well when we do that."

"No, it doesn't," Holly agreed. "And I don't want to happen this time. The things not ending up well, I mean."

"Neither do I," Roger said. "So, when we do make love-"

"When?" Holly interrupted hopefully.

"When," Roger said firmly.

"Oh good," Holly murmured.

"I want it to be..." He fumbled for the right words. "...right," he settled on. "And special. I want it to be an expression of everything that's beyond words between us. I...I'm really bad at this."

"I think you're better than you think you are," Holly said. She cradled his hand in both of her hands now. "And I think the difference between us now and us before is that now we're finally smart enough to stop ourselves from going too far, and from using sex as some kind of a fix, or as a diversion to forget about everything else for awhile."

"Yes," Roger said. "It means more than that now, Hol. It means everything. _**You, we,**_ mean everything."

"To me too," she agreed.

"And you're legally a free woman, but legally, I'm not a free man, and I don't want Dinah and Hart to get any ideas about using you as some kind of leverage in Dinah's and my divorce," Roger continued. "I'm not putting you in that position."

Holly understood that Roger's reasons for not dragging her into the middle of his divorce from Dinah were much deeper than not wanting to give Dinah leverage in the divorce, though she didn't doubt that Dinah would accuse Roger of adultery, conveniently neglecting the fact that she'd been cheating on him with Hart for months, if she got the slightest hint of the ever-strengthening, ever-growing relationship Roger was forming with her, and it made her love him even more than she already did. "So we wait," Holly said.

"We wait," Roger agreed. "I don't want anything or anyone in our way this time, including ourselves. I want to be able to give you all of me without anything unresolved from our pasts."

"Definitely," Holly said. "And when it does happen, it's not going to be just sex."

"No, it isn't," Roger agreed. "We feel too much for each other for it to ever be just sex."

They fell silent for a moment. Then Roger said, "Do you want to go back to the dock party?"

"Do you?" Holly asked.

Roger lifted one shoulder in a shrug. "We don't have to...although our friends saw us out on the dance floor and then saw us leave together."

"And none of them are thinking, 'She must be out of her mind,'" Holly said, unable to hide the wonder in her tone at that fact.

"None of them are sitting in judgment of us right now either," Roger mused. "If any of them think it's a mistake, it's only because they're afraid we're moving too fast. People are actually rooting for us to get together. Other than Chrissy, I mean."

"It's nice to have people in your corner instead of everyone thinking there's something wrong with you for wanting what you want...for loving who you love," Holly reflected.

"It sure is."

Holly rose to her feet, then pulled Roger to his feet. "Let's go home, to our separate suites on the same floor."

"And take separate long, cold showers," Roger suggested.

"Yeah," Holly said with a chuckle.

When they reached the car, Roger opened Holly's door for her and said, "I am, you know."

"You are what?" Holly asked, turning to look at him.

"The greatest fan of your life," he replied earnestly.

She smiled at him and rested her hand on his cheek for a few seconds. "And I'm the greatest fan of yours," she said. When she removed her hand from his cheek, he caught it in his own and kissed it quickly before they got in the car and went back to The Bayshore, where they shared another searing kiss before retreating to their separate suites, thinking about the step they didn't take that night...and the more important step they _**did**_ take that night.

* * *

_**The song Roger and Holly slow dance to in this chapter is the original version of Edwin McCain's "I'll Be," off his album Misguided Roses. **_

_**The fast song that breaks the spell they're under is "Closer to Free" by the Bodeans. **_


	13. The Upside of Food Poisoning

Roger frowned when Holly didn't answer her office phone. She had told him that morning when they rode the elevator down together that she would be at work until 5:00, and it was only a few minutes after 3:30. He pulled out the phone book and looked up the main number for KBAY's switchboard. When the secretary answered, he asked to speak to Matthew Cory, knowing that Holly had been working with Matthew.

"Matthew Cory," Matt said hurriedly.

"Hello, this is Roger Thorpe. I was looking for Holly, but she's not answering her office phone. Is she in editing or something?" he asked.

"No, she went home sick a little while ago, and I'm headed out now myself because she had lunch with my mother, and Mom's in such bad shape that she's been taken to the hospital," Matt said.

Alarmed, Roger said, "Are you sure Holly's not at the hospital?"

"Paulina was at the house with little Mack when Mom got home, and Mom nearly collapsed, so Paulina insisted she go to the hospital. Mom said that she and Holly had lunch together, and I was here when Holly said she felt sick and was going home," Matt said.

"Thank you. I hope Rachel recovers soon," Roger said.

"Me too," Matt said before ringing off.

Michael walked into Roger's office just as Roger was hanging up the phone. "Hey, Roger, I-What's wrong?" he asked, seeing the look on Roger's face.

"Holly's sick," he said. "I think it's food poisoning. She had lunch with Rachel Cory, and Rachel is now in the hospital. I called KBAY's main number when I couldn't get Holly on her office phone, and I was told that she went home sick."

"Go," Michael said, instantly understanding. "Let me know how she is later, or tomorrow."

"I will, thanks," Roger said, rushing out of the office, down to his car, and straight to The Bayshore.

When there was no answer to his repeated knocking at Holly's door, Roger was ready to go back downstairs, pull Ned out from behind the concierge desk, and demand that Ned let him into Holly's suite, and just as Roger was about to do exactly that, the door slowly opened, revealing Holly leaning heavily against the door jamb, both her hands gripping the doorknob tightly to keep herself upright. She looked pale and drawn, her eyes were glassy, and she was bent forward, grimacing in pain. She opened her mouth, but before she could speak, a look of panic chased the glassiness from her eyes and she clapped one hand to her mouth and, with great difficulty, turned from the door and hurried back into the suite, half-stumbling. Roger was right behind her and saw her disappear into the bedroom of the suite, with its adjoining bathroom.

Roger grimaced when he heard Holly getting sick in the bathroom. She had closed the door behind her, so he waited outside the bathroom door worriedly. When the retching stopped, the toilet flushed, and several seconds went by without any other sounds coming from behind the bathroom door, Roger called out, "Holly?" A broken groan was the only reply. He opened the door and stepped into the bathroom to find Holly lying in a heap on the floor in front of the toilet, curled in the fetal position. He fell to his knees beside her and said sympathetically, "Oh, honey."

"Food poisoning," she said weakly.

He gently smoothed her hair off her forehead, frowning when he realized she was feverish. "I think you have a fever," he said.

She opened her eyes and pressed the back of one hand to her forehead. "Maybe I do," she mused.

She struggled to sit up then, stopping the struggle when Roger reached out to help her into a sitting position. "Do you need to stay here for awhile, or would you like to go back to bed, or to the couch?"

"Bed," Holly said wearily. He noticed then that she was in an ankle-length blue-and-white-striped nightgown with plain white socks on her feet. He helped her to her feet and she leaned heavily against him as she shuffled and he walked slowly, helping her out to the bedroom and then into the bed. He pulled the sheet up to her chest, then fluffed her pillows.

"Will you be okay by yourself for about fifteen minutes?" he asked.

"'Okay' is stretching it, but I'm sure I'll still be alive in fifteen minutes," she replied. "Why?"

"There's a drugstore around the corner. I have to run over there and get a few things, but I'll be right back," he said. He started to lean in to kiss her, but she grimaced, holding up a hand and twisting her mouth in distaste. "Right," he murmured. He kissed her forehead before hurrying out to the living room, pulling the Yellow Pages from the desk, and after finding the number for Bay City General Hospital, he punched it into his cellular phone. The last thing Holly heard before the front door of the suite opened and closed, signaling Roger's departure, was his voice saying, "I need to speak to Dr. John Hudson right away. It's an emergency."

As her stomach cramped and did barrel rolls, and she cursed The Seafood Shanty for putting her, and presumably Rachel as well, in this position, Holly closed her eyes and tried to will herself not to get sick again. Unfortunately, food poisoning was completely unaffected by mind over matter, and she had to bolt for the bathroom again.

She was just settling herself back in bed again when she heard the front door of the suite open again, and a moment later, Roger appeared in the doorway of the bedroom, carrying two large bags from the drugstore. "How are you feeling?" he asked anxiously.

"Lousy," Holly replied succinctly.

"I called John Hudson," he said as he set the bags on top of the dresser then dragged the armchair by the doors that opened onto a small balcony over by the bed. "I'm guessing you ate at The Seafood Shanty?"

"Never mention that place to me again," Holly said grimly.

Roger nodded. "Well, that place was obviously pretty popular because dozens of people have either showed up at the ER or called the hospital with food poisoning," he continued. He got up then and went to the dresser, rummaging through one of the bags until he found a thermometer. He brought the thermometer back to the bed and said, "John said as long as your temperature isn't over 101.5, and you don't get dehydrated, you don't have to go to the hospital, so let's see what we're dealing with." With a muffled sigh, Holly accepted the thermometer, holding it under her tongue while Roger kept an eye on his watch. The thermometer was digital, and when it beeped, Roger took it out of Holly's mouth and looked at the red numbers on the readout. "100," he announced. "Okay, that's one hurdle down. Now, you need to drink something and hope it stays down. I got ginger ale and Gatorade. John recommended Gatorade to replace your electrolytes."

None of that sounded good to Holly, but Roger looked so worried, and she really didn't want to land in the ER tonight. "Okay, Gatorade," she said. "There's ice in the freezer."

"Lemon-lime, orange, or grape?" he asked. "I got every flavor they had."

"Lemon-lime."

"Coming right up."

Holly winced. "Please, don't use that particular phrase," she said.

"Sorry," Roger said, wincing too.

When he returned with the Gatorade in a glass with three ice cubes and a straw, Holly took a few sips and then lay back against the pillows, one hand resting lightly on her aching stomach. Roger took the glass from her and set it on the nightstand, then settled himself in the armchair beside her bed. "Can I do anything else for you?" he asked.

"Stay with me," she replied.

"All night," he promised.

"When I pictured asking you to stay with me all night, this is not at all what I had in mind," she said ruefully.

"Me either," he admitted, leaning in closer and gently clasping her hand in his as he smoothed the hair off her forehead again with his other hand. "If I could be sick for you, I would."

"I wouldn't wish feeling like this on someone I hate, and I certainly wouldn't want you to feel this awful. I didn't know it was possible for my stomach to hate me this much. But it's sweet of you to say that."

"I mean it," Roger said earnestly. "I'm...well, 'happy' isn't the right word, but I'm glad that I'm here to take care of you."

"Me too," she replied. Then her stomach groaned loudly. "Here we go again," she said, dropping Roger's hand and throwing back the covers as Roger rose and pushed the chair back. She quickly cut a path to the bathroom, slamming the door behind her. A few minutes went by, and Holly had left the door ajar, so Roger cautiously peeked around the door and found her lying on the floor in the fetal position again. He sank to the floor beside her again. "The whole room is spinning," she said. "I don't want to move right now."

John had said dizziness could be a symptom of food poisoning as well. "Then we'll stay right here until you feel strong enough for me to carry you back to bed," Roger resolved.

"I am never even driving by that place again," Holly murmured miserably. Then she slowly turned her head and looked at Roger. "I wonder if Rachel has this too?"

"She does," Roger confirmed. "Actually, um, she's in the hospital."

"Oh no," Holly said.

"I tried calling you at the station, and when you didn't answer, I called the switchboard. They put me through to Matthew Cory, who was on his way to the hospital to be with Rachel. Apparently she made it home and nearly collapsed, and Paulina was there and insisted she go to the hospital."

"And I suggested we eat there," Holly groaned.

"I'm sure Rachel won't hold it against you," Roger said.

He got to his feet then, found a clean washcloth in the cupboard by the tub and shower, and fixed a cold compress for her, helping her hold it against her forehead for a few minutes. "Oh god, I'm gonna be sick again," she moaned, struggling to sit up. Roger helped her up just in time, holding her hair back while she got sick again.

"You want to try going back to bed now?" Roger asked after he'd gotten her a cup of water to rinse her mouth.

"Yes," she whispered. Roger then scooped her up in his arms and carried her back to bed, frowning worriedly at how warm she felt, praying that her fever hadn't gone over 101.5 degrees, because then they'd have to go to the hospital. Once she was in bed again, she closed her eyes and tried not to think about how much her stomach hurt and how nauseous she was.

She was dimly aware that Roger was talking to someone on the phone, but she had no idea who it was, nor did she particularly care at that point as she managed to zone out to the point that she started to worry about lying on her back should she fall asleep and then get sick again; she always slept on her side, but lying on her side made her stomach hurt even worse than it already did. She had no idea how long it actually was, but it felt like only a few minutes later when Roger softly, gently called her name. "Holly? Holly, honey, I need you to wake up for me. We have to take your temperature again." Holly didn't bother to open her eyes, but did allow Roger to coax the thermometer under her tongue again. She thought she heard a knock at the front door, but she wasn't certain until she heard another male voice besides Roger's, this one sounding vaguely familiar, but it required too much thought for her to figure out who the other voice belonged to, so she didn't bother.

The thermometer beeped, and Roger removed it from her mouth. "Oh, jeez, 101!" he exclaimed anxiously.

"Has she been able to keep anything down?" John Hudson asked, setting his medical bag at the foot of Holly's bed.

"She had a few sips of Gatorade, but she got sick about twenty minutes later," Roger reported.

"You put ice in it?" John asked, noticing the glass with the half-melted ice cubes on the nightstand.

"She asked for ice," Roger said defensively.

"Get a fresh glass, and make it room temperature this time," John directed. He opened his medical bag.

"Roger?" Holly asked groggily.

"I'm right here," Roger replied.

"Who else is here?" she asked.

"Dr. John Hudson," John answered. "We met at the dock party last month, remember, Holly? I'm Mike's brother."

"Right," Holly said. She forced her eyes open. "Excuse me for not getting up, but if I move, I'll probably throw up all over you."

"Nausea's really bad, huh?" John asked sympathetically as he fastened a blood pressure cuff around Holly's arm.

"The worst," she muttered.

"Blood pressure is good," John reported after taking her blood pressure. He then took Holly's wrist in his right hand while cocking his left wrist to look at his watch while he took her pulse. "Pulse is normal," he continued. "But we need to get that fever down and get some liquids in you to keep you from dehydrating, or you _**will** _end up in the hospital."

"Do you have anything you could give her for the nausea?" Roger asked.

"Yes," John replied. "A shot." Seeing Roger blanch at this, he said, "The shot is for her, not for you."

"He doesn't do well with needles," Holly said. "Go get the Gatorade, Roger."

"Did you get ibuprofen or acetaminophen, something for fever?" John asked.

"I got Motrin," Roger said.

"Ibuprofen," John said. "Get two tablets with that Gatorade, and remember, room temperature."

Roger hurried off to get the Gatorade and ibuprofen, and while he was gone, John gave Holly a shot for her nausea. When Roger returned, Holly took the tablets and slowly drank half the glass of Gatorade. "Keep an eye on your temperature," John said. "Give the ibuprofen some time to bring it down, but if it doesn't come down by midnight, call me. My home number's in the phone book. And drink as much as you can. Dehydration is the big concern, but if you can keep liquids down, that's a sign that you're on the mend."

"How is Rachel?" Holly asked.

"We had to admit her, but she's listed in stable condition, and she was sleeping when I left the hospital," John replied. "I know you feel horrible, but you're one of the luckier patients I've seen today." He closed his medical bag. "Rest, take fluids, and call if you need anything."

"Thank you, John, for everything," Roger said.

"Yes, thank you," Holly echoed.

"Anytime," John said, picking up his medical bag. "I'll see myself out."

After John had left, Roger said, "Feeling any better?"

"Maybe a little," Holly replied. Roger fluffed her pillows up again.

"I got some crossword puzzle books and word search books at the drugstore," he offered.

"Too much thinking," she replied. "I'm not up for that right now."

"The TV is in the living room. I could carry you to the couch if you want to watch something."

"Food commercials, and food is the last thing I want to see, or even think about, right now."

Then Roger spotted the book beside the lamp on the bedside table. "Is this what you're reading right now?" he asked, picking it up.

"Yes, but I don't feel like reading," Holly said.

"Actually, I thought _**I'd** _read to _**you**_...if you wanted."

"You would really read to me?" she asked.

"If you want me to," he replied.

"I'd like that," she said.

Roger looked at the book's cover then. "_Pride and Prejudice_."

"Technically it's a classic. Even if it's considered a romance novel, it's not a chintzy one," Holly replied.

"It couldn't be. You don't read chintzy romance novels," Roger reminded her.

Roger picked up and opened the book, removed the bookmark holding Holly's place, and began to read aloud to Holly about Elizabeth Bennet, Mr. Darcy, Mr. Bingley, Elizabeth's family, and their various cohorts, until they were both completely caught up in the story, Holly taking periodic sips of Gatorade and only making one trip to the bathroom. When she returned, Roger took her temperature again because it had been a couple of hours, and they were both relieved when they discovered her fever was down to 99.7 degrees; not back to normal, but getting there.

Settled in bed once again, propped up against the pillows that Roger had re-fluffed, Holly looked at him as he resumed reading _Pride and Prejudice _aloud, feeling better in a way that had nothing to do with her beleaguered digestive system.

"'She certainly did not hate him. No; hatred had vanished long ago, and she had almost as long been ashamed of ever feeling a dislike against him, that could be so called. The respect created by the conviction of his valuable qualities, though at first unwillingly admitted, had for some time ceased to be repugnant to her feelings; and it was now heightened into somewhat of a friendlier nature, by the testimony so highly in his favour, and bringing forward his disposition in so amiable a light, which yesterday had produced. But above all, above respect and esteem, there was a motive within her of good will which could not be overlooked. It was gratitude. Gratitude not merely for having once loved her, but for loving her still well enough, to forgive all the petulance and acrimony of her manner in rejecting him, and all the unjust accusations accompanying her rejection. He who, she had been persuaded, would avoid her as his greatest enemy, seemed, on this accidental meeting, most eager to preserve the acquaintance, and without any indelicate display of regard, or any peculiarity of manner, where their two selves only were concerned, was soliciting the good opinion of her friends, and bent on making her known to his sister. Such a change in a man of so much pride, excited not only astonishment but gratitude-for to love, ardent love, it must be attributed; and as such its impression on her was of a sort to be encouraged, as by no means unpleasing, though it could not exactly be defined,'" Roger read.

He lowered the book to meet her gaze. "I think I can see why you like this," he said.

"You found me out," she said. "I can relate to Elizabeth Bennet."

"She does remind me of you. I like how she calls Mr. Darcy on everything, doesn't let him get away with anything. Like the part where she tells him that first she was surprised that he knew six accomplished women, but now she wonders how he knows any." Roger looked down at the page again. "'Gratitude not merely for having once loved her, but for loving her still well enough, to forgive all the petulance and acrimony of her manner in rejecting him, and all the unjust accusations accompanying her rejection,'" he read again.

"I would have deserved it if you had told me that day in May to leave and never come back," she said then.

"I could never do that," Roger replied after he looked up from the book once more. "It would be like carving my heart out of my chest and throwing it out the window, because you _**are** _my heart, Holly. And you never would have left if I had given you reasons to stay." He took her hand in his then, looking down at their joined hands for several seconds before looking into her eyes once more. "We both made mistakes," he said. "We'll both make mistakes in the future. But they're not going to be the catastrophic kind of mistakes that send us reeling and looking for somebody else to give us something we're not getting from each other. I can't promise that I'll never hurt your feelings again, but I _**can**_, I _**do**_, promise that I will do everything in my power to always give you what you need from me and to never take you for granted."

"And I promise you that I will always fight for you, and for us," Holly replied. "I never want to lose you again." She reached for the book. "I have to admit, you kind of remind me of Mr. Darcy too." She took the book from him and flipped through a few pages, found the passage she was looking for, and read it aloud. "'I have faults enough, but they are not, I hope, of understanding. My temper I dare not vouch for. It is, I believe, too little yielding— certainly too little for the convenience of the world. I cannot forget the follies and vices of others so soon as I ought, nor their offenses against myself. My feelings are not puffed about with every attempt to move them. My temper would perhaps be called resentful. My good opinion once lost, is lost forever.'"

"That does sound familiar," Roger agreed. "I'm working on it, though. Really, I am."

"I know you are," Holly replied. "I see it. I see it every day."

They looked at each other in silence for a long moment. "So, judging from the condition of this book, you've read this several times before. Do Elizabeth and Mr. Darcy end up together?"

"What do you think?" Holly asked.

"I think they do," Roger replied. Holly said nothing, just managed a wan smile. "So, do they?" he persisted.

"Keep reading," she said. "And no skipping ahead to the end to find out, either."

Roger resumed reading, and three chapters later, he looked up from the book to discover that Holly had fallen asleep. As tempted as he was to flip to the last chapter and read that to see if Elizabeth and Mr. Darcy did indeed end up together, she had told him not to, and so he marked his place in the book and put it back behind the lamp on the nightstand. He touched his hand to her forehead; a light sheen of sweat covered her skin and she no longer felt feverish, much to his relief. He switched off the lamp, noting the gathering dark outside. Since Holly's suite was on the opposite side of the seventeenth floor from Roger's and faced the bay, her suite had that small balcony overlooking the bay.

Roger stepped outside, taking a deep breath of the early autumn air, then resting his arms on the balcony railing and looking out into the night.

Although he hated that she felt so sick, Roger reveled in taking care of Holly. He was becoming more and more aware, in a way he had never been aware before, that it was the little things that made up a truly fulfilling life. They had settled into something of a routine the past five weeks, since the dock party. They met for breakfast nearly every morning, unless one of them had a breakfast meeting for work. They worked at their respective offices, and had dinner together every night. They watched old movies, played Scrabble, and kept in touch with Blake, albeit separately, and with Dinah and Hart thinking that Roger was living in the psych ward of Bay City General Hospital, Roger didn't dare show up in Springfield in person, so he kept in touch with her by phone. In fact, Blake was the one who had alerted him earlier today that Dinah was back in town, and looking very tan, a fact he had put on the back burner in his mind because of Holly's illness. He had left the balcony doors open to listen out for her if she needed him, and let the quiet of the early autumn night seep into his bones as he turned the facts over in his mind.

His divorce from Dinah would be final sometime in the next ten days to two weeks, according to Cass, who was representing him, as he had represented Holly in her divorce from Fletcher. They had to fly under the radar, since Dinah thought she'd had him committed, but Cass was an excellent attorney and reported the results of his meetings with Dinah and Ross back to Roger in great detail. Roger wasn't fighting anything that Dinah asked for; he gave her the penthouse and the settlement she asked for, the amount of which, frankly, surprised him, because he had thought she would try to get much more money out of him in the divorce than she said she wanted. Maybe she figured that getting the full amount of her trust fund back was restitution enough.

But to Roger, it wasn't enough.

He had married Alexandra for her money and her company, and kept Mindy on the side because she was young and good-looking and Alex despised her, and until he found out she couldn't have children, he had thought about having a family with her. He had used Jenna to get Spaulding back when Alan-Michael and Nick proved unable to hold onto the company in the absence of Alan, Alexandra, and Phillip. When he met Dinah, they were both outcasts emotionally estranged from the people they most loved in the world, and theirs was never a marriage built on love. Dinah married him to stick it to Ross and Vanessa, and Roger married her because he couldn't have Holly, because he wanted to show her that he was over her...which was a lie, because he would never be over Holly...and to get at her trust fund.

Of the four of them, Dinah was the only one he thought of as a friend. He tolerated Ross because Ross made Blake so happy, and was the father of two of his three grandsons, and now that Vanessa was sharing custody of Peter with Bridget, Vanessa had no use for Roger and took great pains to see that their paths never crossed, since Roger's visits with Peter always occurred when Bridget had him. Mindy and Jenna had both left Springfield, and Roger was taking the same great pains to avoid Alex that Vanessa was taking to avoid him.

Dinah deserved better than he had given her. He knew she had her trust fund back. And if she and Hart truly loved each other, then he wished them well. No one in their family, such as it was, seemed to go about falling in love in the conventional way. Chrissy and Ross hadn't. If this was the real deal between Hart and Dinah, then they hadn't. And the long and winding road he and Holly had traveled had been anything but conventional.

Roger didn't fool himself that he and Hart could ever be as close as he and Chrissy were, but he wanted his son to be happy, and if Dinah made him happy, then Roger could accept that.

If things went the way he hoped they would, then he and Holly would be making their home in Bay City, so if Dinah and Hart chose to stay in Springfield, they would not be constantly bumping into each other, which would be easier all around until some time and distance from the current situation had elapsed.

Roger was ready to get on with his life, and he wanted that life to be with Holly. Just a few more things remained to be settled, and then they could officially make their new beginning.

It was getting colder outside, the nip in the air just the latest indication that autumn was here to stay. Roger didn't want the night air to give Holly a chill, so he went back inside and, after checking on her, stepped into the living room. First he called room service and ordered a corned beef sandwich since he hadn't had any dinner yet. While he was waiting for room service to show up, he performed a quick financial transaction. When the sandwich arrived, he quickly ate it in the living room, hoping the smell wouldn't reach Holly and reawaken her nausea. Then he slipped down the hall to his own suite for his toothbrush and a blanket. Holly was still sleeping peacefully when he returned, so he brushed his teeth, gargled with mouthwash, and then returned to the armchair at Holly's bedside, wrapping the blanket around himself and watching her sleep.

"This time, we're gonna get it right," Roger said softly to the sleeping Holly, leaning forward in his chair. "Nothing and no one is going to come between us ever again. We'll have no secrets between us, no lies. No shadows or threats from the past hanging over us. We'll talk about everything. This is our chance, Hol, and we're gonna make the most of it." He brushed a gentle kiss to her cheek, and felt her stir slightly, so he sat back in his chair.

She opened her eyes slightly. "I didn't mean to wake you," he whispered.

"'S'okay," she said. "I'm thirsty. Could I have some more Gatorade?"

Roger picked up her glass from the bedside table and handed it to her. She ignored the straw and drank straight from the glass. After she had drained it, she handed it back to him and said, "Could I please have some more? No ice."

"Sure," Roger said, hurrying to the kitchen to fill her glass again. When he returned, she drank half of this glass, then handed it back to him. "How are you feeling?"

Holly took stock of herself before answering. "My stomach still hurts some, but I'm not nauseous anymore."

"You don't feel feverish anymore," Roger said. He retrieved the thermometer from the bedside table and breathed an audible sigh of relief when it registered Holly's temperature as 98.6 degrees-back to normal.

"You're an excellent nursemaid," Holly said.

"I learned from the best," Roger replied with a smile. "You want to hear some more of _Pride and Prejudice_?"

"I'd love to," Holly said.

Roger turned the lamp on, picked up the book, opened it, and began reading again. Holly lay propped up on her pillows, watching him with a smile as he read. "'...to her utter amazement, she saw Mr. Darcy walk into the room. In an hurried manner he immediately began an inquiry after her health, imputing his visit to a wish of hearing that she were better. She answered him with cold civility. He sat down for a few moments, and then getting up, walked about the room. Elizabeth was surprised, but said not a word. After a silence of several minutes, he came towards her in an agitated manner, and thus began:

"'In vain I have struggled. It will not do. My feelings will not be repressed. You must allow me to tell you how ardently I admire and love you.'"

Roger covered Holly's hand on the bed with the hand that was not holding the book and read on through Elizabeth's reaction and straight to the end of the story, learning that he was right and Elizabeth and Mr. Darcy did indeed end up together and married.

When he closed and lowered the book upon finishing it, he saw that Holly was asleep again. He set the book back on the nightstand, turned out the lamp, and looked at her there in the dim light of the room, softly snoring in exhaustion, because Holly only ever snored when she was deeply exhausted. "We're almost there," he whispered. As much as he wanted to kiss her, he didn't want to wake her up again, so he slipped off his shoes, wrapped the blanket around himself, settled himself in the chair beside her bed, whispered, "I love you," and gazed at Holly until he too fell asleep.


	14. Showdown

While Roger unlocked the door of his suite, Michael was on Roger's cellular phone with Donna. "No, Donna, I am not telling you over the phone, just get over here to The Bayshore already!" Michael exclaimed. "Okay, ten minutes. And hey-I love you." When he disconnected the call and handed the phone back to Roger he said, "Why are you still here? Go down the hall and get Holly!"

"She did say she wasn't working today," Roger mused.

"Go!" Michael said, pointing. "I'll call room service and order champagne, and since I'm technically the boss, it's on me."

So Roger hurried down the hall and knocked on Holly's door. When she opened the door and took in the sight of him standing there, his tie loosened, his collar unbuttoned, the look on his face one that was a cross between amazement, happiness, and pride, she knew instantly what it had to be. "Yahoo went national," she greeted him.

"Yeah," Roger said, surprised. "How did you know?"

"It's written all over you," she replied. "Roger, that's wonderful. I'm so happy for you, and so proud of you." She hugged him then, and he held her tightly, closing his eyes for a moment. This was huge: his first business success with Michael, one that had nothing to do with anything Spaulding-related.

When Roger drew back, still holding Holly, he said, "Michael's in my suite, and Donna's on her way. We're going to celebrate. I really want you there."

"Nothing could keep me away," Holly said. She slid her hand into his as they walked back down the hall.

Michael had left the door unlocked, and Roger and Holly were both surprised when they walked into Roger's suite together and found Michael standing there with his brother John. "Hey, Black Fox, I think you have another, even better reason to celebrate," Michael said with a big smile.

John handed Roger an official-looking envelope then. "This was in my mail this morning," he said. "I thought you'd want this as soon as possible."

Roger opened the envelope and removed the papers inside, reading them over.

"Roger?" Holly asked. Behind her, Michael and John exchanged a knowing glance.

Roger looked up from the papers and met Holly's eyes. "My divorce from Dinah is final," he said.

"It is?" she asked, seeing the relief and the happiness in his eyes and feeling that same relief and happiness in her own heart and soul.

"Yeah," Roger said, holding up the papers. "That's what this says. I'm legally a free man."

The smile on Holly's face was positively beatific. Roger was beaming now as well, and unable to hold back, he pulled Holly into his arms and kissed her soundly in front of Michael and John. It took a split second for her to kiss him back just as soundly. Donna and the room service guy with the champagne and glasses arrived at the same time, in the middle of Roger and Holly's kiss, and Michael said, "Roger's divorce is final."

"No wonder you called me down here to celebrate," Donna said. "But are you sure they really need us, Michael? They seem to be doing just fine on their own."

"That wasn't the reason I called you down here," Michael replied. "Yahoo is going national at opening of business tomorrow morning. That's what we're celebrating, but then Roger got his final divorce decree-"

"And my work here is definitely done," John interrupted. He hugged Donna in both greeting and farewell, then said, "We need to be nailing down our Thanksgiving plans. We were all at yours and Mike's place last year, and I know Vicky and Ryan and Marley and Jamie and the boys will be spending at least part of the day at Rachel's, but Sharlene and I thought it would be nice if we took our turn this year and had all of you out to the farm. Plus with Mom right next door, it's easier to get her back and forth, because you and Mike are downtown, and the girls and their families are out in the 'burbs, and of course Josie and Gary don't have room to host everybody in their apartment."

"I'll call Victoria and Marley tonight, let them know, and then call Sharlene," Donna promised.

John clapped Michael on the shoulder. "That's great about Yahoo, Mike," he said. "And I'm glad that my playing messenger boy was so great for Roger and Holly. Give them my regards when they come up for air, will you? I have to get back."

"Sure," Michael replied, clapping John on the shoulder. "Catch you later."

"Catch you later," John said, carefully skirting around Roger and Holly to take his leave.

The room service guy finished setting up the glasses on the table behind the couch, and left the champagne in the ice bucket as Michael directed him. After Michael tipped him, he too left.

The popping of the champagne cork broke through to Roger and Holly, who finally ended their kiss, both of them breathless. "Sorry about that," Roger said somewhat sheepishly to Michael and Donna, his arms still loosely around Holly's shoulders, as her arms were still loosely around his neck. "I lost my mind for a minute there."

"We can always put it back when you're done," Donna said gaily, accepting a glass of champagne from Michael. "You don't look like you regret it anyway, and I can see that Holly certainly doesn't."

Roger looked at Holly and found her looking back at him. "No," he agreed, "I certainly don't regret it."

"Neither do I," Holly replied.

Michael had his own glass of champagne now, and had poured glasses for Roger and Holly. "A toast," he said, but before he could continue, or Holly and Roger could even pick up their glasses, the phone rang.

Roger answered it. "Hello?"

"You lying bastard!"

Roger's expression instantly changed, his smile disappearing completely, his eyes going flinty with an undercurrent of anxiety in them, and his shoulders showing the tension he was feeling in ever fiber of his being. Holly, Michael and Donna were all puzzled, wondering what could have brought about such an instantaneous change in Roger, but that question was answered when Roger uttered one word: "Hart."

"What the hell do you think you're trying to pull?" Hart demanded.

"To what, specifically, are you referring?" Roger asked, battling to keep his tone even. Hart was clearly angry and very worked up, and Roger didn't want to poke an agitated tiger. Roger heard Dinah telling Hart in the background to calm down; she sounded put out too, but she also sounded much more in control than Hart did.

"I'm not getting into it over the phone. Come to the farm. 3:00 today," Hart practically growled.

"I'll be there," Roger said.

"I'm looking forward to it. We're gonna settle this once and for all!" Hart exclaimed before slamming the phone down in Roger's ear.

The jubilant mood in the room had vanished, replaced by an air of tension and anxiety. Roger hung up the phone and tried to smile at the others, but it fell flat. "I'm busted," he said.

"What did Hart say?" Holly asked.

"Well, first he called me a lying bastard, which is technically true," Roger began.

"Don't. Don't do that," Holly said. "This is the same man who tried to run you down with his car once, Roger. I know he's your son, but when has he ever given you a break? You have tried to do everything possible to get to know him and to build a relationship with him, and he wants to no part of it, he wants no part of you. He has been trying to gaslight you for months. So don't stand there and try to sell me on him having a point about you or being right about you. He has made it his goal in life to act like the martyr where you're concerned, and he expects you to just take whatever he dishes out to you because he thinks you owe him. You didn't even know he existed until he told you. He doesn't have a leg to stand on. He doesn't know you the way I do and the way Blake does, and he has never tried to get to know you the way Blake and I have. Biology is the only link you have because that's the way _**he**_ wants it to be, and no matter what you say and do, he is never going to give you a fair chance, and I just hate seeing you hurt all the time, and turning yourself inside out trying to make him love you."

"What else did he say?" Michael asked then. "What does he want from you this time?"

"He wants to see me this afternoon to settle everything once and for all," Roger replied.

"I'm going with you," Holly and Michael said in unison.

"And don't even think about arguing with me," Michael added sternly. "If this punk tried to run you over with his car once, that proves he's a loose cannon, that he is capable of doing absolutely anything. You need somebody to have your back, and you know damned well I always come through in that regard, Roger."

"I would feel better if you were there," Roger told Michael. "Thanks."

"And you expect me to sit here and wait alone while you go walking into certain danger? No. Absolutely not!" Holly exclaimed. "Hart and Dinah have been sleeping together for how long now? And you and Dinah are officially, legally divorced." Holly grabbed Roger's upper arms then, holding onto him as her gaze bored into his. "I'm a part of this, Roger. I was the one who found out about Dinah and Hart's affair first and told you about it. You don't have to do this alone, and yes," she said when Roger opened his mouth to speak, "I know Michael is going to be there, but they're not going to know that Michael is there, right?"

"Right," Michael replied.

"Dinah will be there by Hart's side. I'm going to be there by yours, where I belong," Holly said.

"You didn't sign on for this," Roger told Holly.

"Yes, I did," Holly replied firmly. "I signed on for everything, all of it, the good_** and** _the bad."

Roger and Holly looked at each other intently, and Michael and Donna exchanged a look of their own behind them. Michael perfectly understood Roger's feelings, and Donna perfectly understood Holly's, because if it were them, Michael would want to keep Donna out of the line of fire, and Donna would insist on being right in the thick of all the action, no matter what, because that's where Michael was.

"If you try to ditch me, I'll just follow you," Holly said then, breaking the silence of her and Roger's staring contest.

Roger finally cracked a smile. "You would, too," he said. "I don't like this. Michael's right; Hart is a loose cannon, capable of anything."

"You don't have to like it. You just have to accept it," Holly replied.

Roger remembered saying something similar to her the last time he had met with Dinah and Hart, having gone by himself that time...although he wasn't really alone then, he recalled; Frankie was in the parking garage below, listening to every word the three of them said on the listening devices she had planted through the penthouse. "Is that what they mean by 'hoist by your own petard'?" he asked.

"Neither one of us is going to get hurt," Holly said determinedly. "Being hoist by your own petard means that you're hurt or destroyed by your own plot, which you intended for somebody else."

"Like getting blown up by your own bomb?" Roger asked.

"This is such a cheerful conversation," Donna interjected then. "The only ones getting hoisted by their own petard today are Dinah and Hart. And I think you should get Frankie in on this too."

"That's a great idea," Michael agreed. Then he looked at Donna suspiciously. "Why are you suggesting we get Frankie in on this?"

"She's a private investigator, she's been in on this from the start too, and since this is happening in Springfield, it is, unfortunately, out of Ryan's jurisdiction. He would have been my first choice, with the entirety of the Bay City Police Department backing him up, but that's not possible," Donna replied.

Holly was already at the phone, punching in Cass's office number. "Cass? Holly Lindsey. Is Frankie there? We have a situation here, and we could really use her help."

"Holly? What's going on?" Frankie asked after she had taken the phone from Cass.

Holly quickly filled Frankie in on the situation, then gave her directions to the Jessup farm. "We'll be there, don't worry," Frankie assured her, and Holly instantly felt better.

"Thank you, Frankie," Holly said earnestly.

"It's what we do," Frankie replied. The last thing she said was, "Everything is going to be fine, Holly."

"Donna," Michael said, for she was the one loose thread remaining.

"I'll find my own way to the police station in Springfield," Donna said. "I presume that's where this whole thing will end up when it's over?"

Michael and Roger exchanged a look. "Ideally," Roger said.

Donna looked to Michael now. "You call my car phone when this whole thing is over," she said. "I'll meet you all at the police station. That_** is** _where you'll all end up, I know it."

And so it was that a few hours later, Roger and Holly were headed to Springfield in Roger's car, with Michael following them in his own car...and Donna gave them a 15-minute head start and then started for Springfield herself in her own car. Frankie and Cass were already at the Jessup farm and waiting when Roger and Holly, and Michael arrived. Dinah and Hart, however, were not there yet.

"Trying to get the upper hand by making you wait to psych you out," Michael said. "That's something we've seen before, right, Fox Head?"

"Right," Roger said. He was worried about having Holly there, though.

"I can't bug a field," Frankie said. "But I _**can**_ film everything, and I will." She held up a video camera.

"Will it be admissible?" Roger asked.

"There are ways around that," Cass said. "We've done this sort of thing before." He looked around. "Mary Frances, what do you think?"

Frankie looked around now too. "Back there," she said, gesturing to a stand of pine trees adjacent to the farmhouse. The pine trees created a semicircle that backed up to the river that ran past the farmhouse.

"You and Cass take the middle, I'll take the left end?" Michael asked, gesturing now himself to where he wanted to hide and where Frankie and Cass would hide.

"That'll work," Frankie replied.

"We've got your back," Michael said to Roger, squeezing his shoulder before going to take his place in the stand of trees.

"Everything's going to be fine," Frankie repeated to Holly. before she and Cass went and hid in the middle of the trees. Sure enough, all three of them were out of sight.

Which left Roger and Holly alone in the middle of the field.

"Last chance to go and hide with the others," Roger told Holly.

She took his hand in hers then and held it. "You had to face them by yourself the last time," she said, firmly but calmly. "You won't have to face them by yourself this time. You never have to face anything by yourself again."

"Well, well, well, isn't this touching," came the sneering voice of Hart Jessup. Roger and Holly both turned to look at him, and they could see the anger emanating from him in waves as he crossed the field, stopping just a few feet from the two of them. "And yet it's not really a surprise to see you here, Holly. I used to think you had more sense than that, but apparently I was wrong. How long have you been sleeping with him?"

"You can say anything you want to about me, but you don't talk about Holly that way," Roger said, his voice steely.

Dinah came briskly trotting around the farmhouse then. "I knew it!" she exclaimed as she went to stand beside Hart. "I _**knew**_ you were cheating on me with Holly!"

"Dinah, the divorce is final. It's a bit late for you to be playing the wounded wife," Roger said tiredly. "And I did not cheat on you, which is more than I can say for you." At Dinah's shocked expression, Roger said, "That's right. _**I**_ know that _**you've** _been sleeping with Hart for months."

Now Dinah looked confused. "You didn't use that in the divorce," she said.

"I didn't see the point," Roger replied. "We just both wanted out of the marriage as soon as possible. You filed, claiming irreconcilable differences, and that was grounds enough to get it issued."

"I didn't think your ego could stand knowing that I cheated on you, and with your own son," Dinah said.

Hart looked at Dinah as if she had lost her mind. "What the hell?" he asked. "_**That's**_ what you want to talk to him about?"

"I don't understand why he didn't come after me, come after both of us, if he knew about us for as long as he says he did!" Dinah exclaimed. "Is that what the money is? Some kind of weird sop?"

"What money?" Holly asked.

"Yes, the money," Hart said, glowering at Roger. "You deposited the exact amount of Dinah's trust fund in her private account at First National. Surely you must have known that we had already been to the Caymans to get her trust fund out the bank you stashed it in down there."

"I did," Roger agreed. "I felt I owed her, though."

Hart laughed mirthlessly. "You owed her. Right," he said sarcastically. "You're being manipulative, Roger, and I _**hate**_ that!"

"Funny how you don't seem to mind when you're the one doing the manipulating," Holly said then.

"I don't recall asking you, Holly!" Hart spat through teeth clenched in rage.

"All right, yeah, we gaslighted you," Dinah said then. From her hiding place, Frankie silently rejoiced at having caught that particular admission from Dinah with her video camera. "It was the surest way we could think of to get my trust fund back without you interfering."

"You've been manipulating us all along," Hart said angrily then. "You let us think that you were safely locked away in the psych ward at the hospital in Bay City for the past few months, only you were never there at all, were you? It was all a lie, a scam. We found out when we went there this morning to see you, and they had no record of you having ever been a patient there, and since you haven't been in Springfield much the past few months, since you weren't in the psych ward, all I could figure was that you had moved into the best hotel in Bay City, and sure enough, that's where we found you. Is that Dr. Hudson even a head shrinker?"

"Dr. Hudson is not your concern," Roger replied. "I am."

Hart clutched at his head for a moment, mussing his hair in the process. "I've really had it with your bullshit, Roger! You think Dinah and I are just puppets that you can make dance to your tune by jerking our strings to suit your will!"

"You want to stand there and talk about jerking strings?" Roger asked. "You tried to make think I was losing my mind! If anyone is a puppetmaster around here, Hart, it's you!"

"So what exactly _**is**_ the money, Roger? Some kind of a payoff?" Dinah persisted.

Roger focused on Dinah now. "I stole your trust fund, and that was wrong of me," Roger said. "We got married for all the wrong reasons."

"Oh, please," Dinah scoffed. "If you were ever going to marry anyone for love, it would be_** her**_." She waved a hand at Holly. "The whole town knows that you claim to love Holly, that you've never gotten over her, and that she has this weird fixation on you. I knew the score. We used each other, Roger. I married you to get my trust and infuriate my parents, and you married me to _**steal**_ my trust fund and probably to try and convince Holly that you were over her, but you weren't. I didn't expect to get a huge payday out of it, and that's what's throwing me."

"I thought of you as a friend, Dinah," Roger said. "And stealing your trust fund was a lousy thing to do to you. It wasn't the action of a friend."

Dinah looked distinctly uncomfortable now. "When did you grow a conscience?" she asked. "You gave me the penthouse, the full amount of the settlement I asked for in the divorce, and the amount of my trust fund twice over."

"He doesn't have a conscience!" Hart yelled. "It's another manipulation, Dinah! Open your eyes!"

"How?" she asked, stopping Hart cold. "How is it a manipulation? He wants Holly. That's not a surprise. He can have her now, because he and I are divorced! And_** we** _gaslighted_** him**_, Hart! He found out about our affair and played right into our hands, letting us commit him, or try to. That's the only manipulation he's really done."

"Don't tell me you're defending him now!" Hart exclaimed.

"No, I'm not defending him!" Dinah exclaimed right back. "I'm just trying to figure all of this out, because it makes no sense whatsoever to me!"

Hart was enraged now. This confrontation with Roger wasn't going according to plan at all.

It was time to get back on plan.

Hart pulled a gun out of his jacket pocket then. "I'm done trying to figure anything out," he said, pointing the gun right at Roger's chest. In the trees, Frankie's heart and stomach both sank, and Cass looked at her worriedly, afraid of what danger she might try to rush into if Hart fired the gun; Michael cursed inwardly, patted his jacket, confident that his own gun was in the inside jacket pocket if needed, and tensed, ready to race into the middle of the fray on a split second's notice, all of his old Marine and CIA instincts straining like a fighter jet on the holdback bar of an aircraft carrier before it was fired off the deck.

Roger extended his arms out at his sides, trying to move in front of Holly, to block her from the muzzle of the gun, but she kept moving with him, half behind him, her arms wrapped around his upper torso, her palms flat on his chest. It was a lousy defense, because a bullet could go through her hand and into Roger's chest, but for the moment, it was the only defense she had to employ, though her mind raced as she tried to think of another, better one.

"We agree that I've been a lousy father to you," Roger said.

"You were never my father!" Hart retorted, holding the gun in both hands, still aimed squarely at Roger's chest.

"Why didn't Michael and I think to ask Ryan for some bulletproof vests?" Frankie whispered frantically to Cass. Cass had no answer, because he hadn't thought of it either.

"Hart, think!" Holly shouted then. "Do you really want to go to jail? If you shoot Roger, at the very least, you're looking at assault with a deadly weapon. At the worst, you're looking at attempted murder, or murder one. That's a minimum of twenty-five years behind bars. Is that what you want to do with the rest of your life?"

"Thank you, Madame Newspaper Editor, I wasn't aware of that," Hart said. "All he has _**ever**_ given me is grief! I'm sick of it!"

"Hart, put the gun down," Roger implored.

Michael recognized the look of pure rage in Hart's eyes. He was almost beyond all reason now.

Holly tried to pull Roger further away from Hart, which, again, was a lousy defense, but the only one she could come up with in that moment. She moved out from behind Roger so she was standing at his side, less than three feet away from him.

"Hart, what are you doing?" Dinah cried. This wasn't going according to their plan at all. Hart was supposed to make Roger angry enough to come at him, but he seemed to have thrown that out the window now.

"What I should have done the second I found out what he was really like," Hart said angrily. He cocked the hammer.

In the next split second, a gunshot rang out.

"NO!" Holly screamed.

She jumped out in front of Roger, shoving him backwards as hard as she could at the same time.

"HOLLY!" Roger screamed as he went down, grabbing her around the waist and pulling her down to the ground with him.

Michael burst out of the trees, covering the thirty yards separating him from Hart in the space of two-and-a-half heartbeats, then throwing a flying tackle, knocking Hart facedown in the mud and holding him down there with a knee in the middle of his back. He ripped the gun from Hart's hand and growled, "You so much as twitch, I'll blow your damned head off!" before pressing the gun to the base of Hart's skull. He looked up at Dinah, whose eyes were as big as dinner plates as she took in the scene before her in shocked silence, and said, "That goes for you too!"

Frankie and Cass came rushing out of their hiding place a split second after Michael charged out of his and rushed to Holly and Roger.

In reality, not even five seconds passed from the time Holly jumped in front of Roger to the time Roger, tears pouring down his face, sat up, crying, "No, God no, Holly!" as he sprang up to his knees and gently rolled Holly over from where she was lying facedown.

Her face and clothes were covered in mud, as were Roger's, and her sweater bore a large black powder stain that spread from just below her breasts to the hem of the sweater at her waist...but there was no blood!

Holly opened her eyes and sat up gingerly, her palm pressed to her stomach, then moving to first one set of ribs and then the other. When she pulled her palm away from her torso and looked at it, all she saw was traces of black powder in her hand. She looked up at Roger in surprise. "Powder," she said.

"Blanks," Frankie realized. "The gun has blanks in it!"

Upon hearing this, Michael shoved Hart's gun in the back of his waistband and reached into his jacket, pulling out his own Glock pistol. The safety was still on it, but Hart and Dinah didn't need to know that, he thought. "Maybe your gun has blanks, but mine doesn't," Michael said. He stood up then, still holding the gun on Hart. "Get up. Now!" he ordered. "Cass!"

Cass hurried over. Michael handed him the gun. "Cover us," he said. Michael then searched Hart, ripping open Hart's bulky jacket and plaid flannel shirt to reveal a fake blood pack strapped to his chest. "Well, what do we have here?" Michael asked rhetorically. "A fake blood pack."

"Designed, no doubt, to make Roger think he had shot you and probably killed you after you baited him into a struggle over the gun," Cass said, "only you couldn't bait Roger, and you lost your temper and abandoned the plan when you got angry over that fact, didn't you?" Hart said nothing. Neither did Dinah, but she was chalk white now and trembling, and not from the chill in the November wind whipping around them now; a thunderstorm was coming.

Roger frantically moved his hands over Holly's torso, coming away with two handfuls of powder traces himself. "You could have been shot!" he exclaimed, his tone of voice half angry and half terrified while the look in his eyes was one mingling concern with amazement.

"And you've been shot three times that I know about!" Holly retorted. "I wasn't about to let number four happen right in front of me!"

Frankie extended a hand to help first Holly and then Roger to their feet. Then the wailing of sirens rent the air. Hart cursed roundly. "Who called the cops?" he demanded to know.

"That would be me." Roger, Holly, Michael, Cass and Frankie all whipped around when they heard Donna utter those four words. "I also took the liberty of calling the auto club because that little tart over there," she gestured to Dinah, "who I'm guessing is Dinah took a crowbar to your car, Roger. Completely smashed the windshield, headlights, taillights, and all four windows. What's the matter, didn't have a knife to slash the tires with?" she asked Dinah blandly. "I was watching from right over there." She turned and pointed to the side of the house, near the enclosed porch. "As soon as I saw that gun come out, I went back to my car and called the local authorities. I have to give them credit, I didn't think they'd get here that fast."

"If you mentioned my name, I'm surprised they weren't here faster," Roger said.

Five police cars pulled to screeching halts, and Detective Cutter and Detective Levy with half a dozen uniformed officers converged on the crowd in the field. "Roger Thorpe," Cutter said. "I should have known those rumors about you being in a mental hospital were too good to be true." He looked around at the assemblage. "I see we have some new faces here. I can't_** wait** _to hear this story."

"Detective, I'm Cass Winthrop. I'm Mr. Thorpe and Ms. Lindsey's lawyer," Cass piped up then.

"Mary Frances Frame, I'm a private investigator in Mr. Thorpe and Ms. Lindsey's employ," Frankie added.

"Michael Hudson, United States Marines, retired, CIA, also retired. Roger's my best friend," Michael said.

Cutter looked at Michael incredulously. "I'm sorry, did you just say that Roger Thorpe is your best friend?" he asked disbelievingly.

"Yes, I did," Michael replied firmly.

"And who are you?" Cutter asked Donna.

"Donna Love. Holly's best friend and an interested bystander," Donna replied, her chin jutting out defiantly.

Cutter pinched the bridge of his nose as the uniformed officers moved around, gathering evidence and formally arresting Dinah, Hart, Roger, and Holly. "Is that really necessary?" Roger asked when one of the uniforms prepared to put handcuffs on Holly.

"Roger, let me take care of everything," Cass said.

"I would listen to my lawyer if I were you," Levy told Roger as he handcuffed him.

Everyone headed down to the police station then, Frankie and Cass, Michael, and Donna being allowed to take their own cars. Once at the station house, Roger, Holly, Dinah, and Hart were booked, then taken to interrogation rooms. Michael was also taken to an interrogation room to be questioned, and Frankie and Cass went with Holly and Roger. Donna's statement took the least amount of time, and she was waiting in the bullpen when a redheaded woman pushing a double stroller containing one sleeping baby boy and one awake baby boy sucking on a pacifier hurried in and tried unsuccessfully to flag down a police officer. "I just want to know where you have Roger Thorpe and Holly Lindsey!" she finally exclaimed in frustration.

"You must be Blake," Donna said.

Blake looked at the woman about her mother's age with the raven-colored bob and frowned. "Yeah, I am. Do I know you?" she asked.

"No, but I've heard a lot about you from your mother and father," Donna replied. "They're fine. They're being questioned right now, but they're fine. I'm Donna Love, a friend of your mother's." She stood up, walked over to Blake, and shook her hand.

"Donna," Blake repeated, realizing this must be the Donna she had overheard her parents talking about on the phone a few months ago. "Blake Thorpe Marler. What happened?"

"Your parents had a little showdown with Hart and Dinah a little while ago," Donna replied. "Hart pulled a gun-" Seeing the panicked look on Blake's face at this news, she hurried on, "No, no, everyone's all right. Holly jumped in front of Roger, and the gun had blanks anyway."

Blake exhaled a sigh of relief, and said, "Wait, how do you know this?"

"I was there. We all were," Donna said.

"'We all were'?" Blake echoed.

"Yes. Me, Michael, Frankie and Cass," Donna said. "The others are being questioned now, along with your parents and Hart and Dinah. And Cass is serving as your parents' lawyer. They couldn't have a better one, truly."

Ross came in then, shouting, "Where's Dinah? What did Roger do now?"

"Excuse me," Donna said, affronted. "Roger didn't do anything. Dinah and Hart were the ones gaslighting him, and sleeping together behind his back for months. Although I guess it wasn't really behind his back, since he's known about it almost as long as I've known him."

Vanessa had arrived just in time to hear that Dinah and Hart were sleeping together. "Dinah and Hart have been having an affair?" she asked, dismayed. "Roger will kill them both!"

"Hart's the one who had a gun today!" Donna retorted.

Vanessa and Ross both looked sickened at this news. "Who was shot?" Ross asked tersely.

"No one," Donna replied. "Well, Hart took a shot at Roger, and he hit Holly, but the gun only had blanks. However, Hart was wearing one of those fake blood packs. Apparently his plan was to provoke Roger into fighting over the gun with him and then make Roger believe that he had shot and probably killed Hart, but Roger wouldn't take the bait, which I guess incensed Hart enough that he forgot himself, or at least forgot the gun had blanks."

Vanessa looked even sicker. Ross noticed Blake then, and the babies. "You brought the boys down here?" he asked her.

"I didn't have time to find a sitter," she told him. "I heard that my mother and father were here, and my only thought was getting to them as soon as possible."

A tidal wave of press came surging into the police station then, including representatives from both WSPR and the _Journal_. Blake was grateful that Fletcher was not among them. Matt Reardon was, however, having followed them in after getting Vanessa's message that she was down at the police station with Dinah.

Cutter exited an interrogation room then and sighed heavily when he saw both the press contingent and Ross and Vanessa. "I would like to see my daughter," Ross told Cutter.

"As would I," Vanessa added.

"It's going to be a long evening," Cutter murmured. "Members of the fourth estate, a statement will be forthcoming!" he shouted before shepherding Ross and Vanessa back to see Dinah.

Michael exited another interrogation room then and came over to join Donna. "How are Roger and Holly?" he asked her.

"Still back there," she replied.

Michael noticed Blake then. "You must be Blake," he said. "Your dad talks about you all the time. I'm Michael Hudson, your dad's best friend."

Blake was as surprised as Cutter had been at the farm. "Best friend?" she repeated.

"Yeah, we go way back," Michael replied. He hunkered down to look at the boys in their stroller. "And you brought Kevin and Jason with you, I see. You're lucky they're fraternal. Our daughters are identical, and there were times they impersonated each other so well that I didn't know who was really who at first. Thank God those days are over."

"Exactly how far back do you go with my father?" Blake asked.

"To the CIA," Michael said. "I know you're worried, but Cass is with them-"

"That's the lawyer, right?" Blake asked.

"Yes," Michael told her, "and he's an excellent one. And Frankie was recording the whole thing. We all saw it. The police will have all of our statements, and Cass and Ryan-"

"Ryan?" Blake asked blankly, her head spinning.

"Our son-in-law. He's the police commissioner in Bay City," Michael told her.

"So he's not here?" Blake asked.

"No, this is outside his jurisdiction," Michael replied. "Anyway, Cass and Ryan would know for absolute certain, but as far as I can tell, neither one of your parents did anything that will get them in jail here. Dinah and Hart were the ones trying to gaslight Roger."

Blake sank wearily into a chair, and when Jason started fussing, she picked him up, pulling a bottle from the diaper bag in the basket beneath the stroller's seats to feed him. "What a mess," she said.

"It's really not as bad as it might seem," Donna said, trying to be encouraging. "Cass will do all he can for Roger and Holly."

"He did handle both of their divorces," Blake mused aloud but mostly to herself.

Matt Reardon wandered over then. "Hart took a shot at Roger and Holly, but there were blanks in the gun?" he asked. "Do I have that right?"

"Yes," Donna said.

"Matt Reardon. I'm Vanessa's husband. Dinah's mother," Matt said.

Donna and Michael introduced themselves and didn't miss the double take Matt did when they said they were Roger and Holly's best friends. Vanessa returned then, looking distraught, and Matt hurried over to her.

Cutter came out a few minutes after Vanessa and called the press over to one corner of the bullpen, where he gave a summary of the events of the afternoon. The reporters kept harping on charges, and Cutter said, "We're still figuring out what charges, if any, will be conferred on everyone involved. We'll have more for you later."

"When?" asked the reporter from WSPR.

"Later," Cutter said firmly before turning on his heel and heading back to the interrogation rooms.

It was another almost two hours before Roger and Holly emerged from the interrogation rooms, along with Frankie and Cass, who hung back to talk to Cutter. Roger spotted Blake first, sitting with Michael, who was holding one of his grandsons, and Donna. "Chrissy!" he exclaimed.

Blake, holding Kevin now, stood up when she saw Roger, Holly right beside him, both of them looking rumpled and a bit worn, with dried mud streaking their clothes (they had been able to clean the mud from their faces upon arriving at the police station). Donna wordlessly held out her hands, and Blake handed Kevin to her, then hurried to her parents, hugging them both at the same time. "Are you guys okay?" she asked anxiously.

"Yes," Holly assured her.

"You were going to take a bullet for Dad?" Blake asked, one hand resting on Holly's arm now, the other hand resting on Roger's.

"I was," Holly said matter-of-factly.

Blake looked at Roger then and found that he was looking at Holly in wonder. Being privy to the existence of those wedding rings in Holly's possession, Blake was not at all surprised that her mother had jumped in front of a gun for her father, and she was exceedingly grateful that the gun had held blanks instead of real bullets, but she figured that Holly had figured that the gun had real bullets, which, to Blake, spoke volumes about the depth of Holly's true feelings for Roger.

"So, what's the good word?" Michael asked as he handed Jason to Roger.

"No charges for Holly, and amazingly enough, no charges against me, either," Roger said, sounding relieved about the first and amazed about the second. "It sure is good to see you again, Jason," he said to the baby, who gurgled and cooed up at his grandfather.

"What about Dinah and Hart?" Donna asked.

"That's still being determined," Holly replied, "although it doesn't look like Frankie's tape of everything that happened out at the farm today is going to be admissible, although the audio recording of the morning they got Roger to agree to be committed _**is**_ admissible."

"Dinah is singing like a canary right now," Cass reported as he strolled up to join the group, Frankie right behind him. "I don't know how truthful she's being, but she's giving the police everything they want from her and then some."

"Hart, on the other hand, has completely clammed up," Frankie said. "They're not getting one word out of him. I don't think they're going to settle any of it tonight."

"Probably not," Cass agreed. "And with that in mind, and the fact that you're not being charged with anything, Roger, Holly, the two of you are free to go, provided you don't leave Bay City, which I promised Detective Cutter you wouldn't."

"We won't," Roger and Holly said in unison.

"All of the glass on your car is being replaced as we speak," Donna said. "You'll want to get in touch with your insurance adjustor tomorrow and let them know about it. I had the auto club take your car to the same garage where we take ours."

"Thank you, Donna, I appreciate it," Roger told her.

"I was glad to be of help," Donna replied.

"You two can ride back with me. I'll drop you at The Bayshore," Michael told Roger and Holly.

Roger handed Jason to Holly, then took Kevin from Donna. As Holly hugged Jason and kissed his cheek, Roger hugged Kevin to his chest before holding him out so he could look into Kevin's tiny face, then said, "You guys are gonna be seeing a lot more of your grandma and me from now on, I promise."

Holly settled Jason in the stroller, then accepted Kevin from Roger and hugged and kissed him before settling him in the stroller with Jason.

Ross emerged from an interrogation room then, and he looked grim. Blake felt awful for him, and she only hoped that Ross would let her be there for him. She didn't want to say 'I told you so'; she just wanted to console her husband. "Call me tomorrow," she told her parents. She wanted to give them time to recover from the events of today, and to digest everything that had happened today and what it meant, especially for their relationship. Maybe by the time she talked to them tomorrow, they would have something to tell her, and they would finally let her in on the fact that they were working on getting back together.

"We will," Holly promised. First she, then Roger, hugged Blake, and Roger lightly kissed Blake's temple. "But call us before then if you need us," Holly added.

Blake then looked at Michael and Donna, Cass and Frankie. "It was nice meeting all of you," she said. "I'm glad that my parents have such good friends." The quartet told Blake it was nice meeting her, Kevin and Jason as well, and then the Bay City contingent left the Springfield police station and headed back home.

Roger and Holly both sat in the backseat of Michael's BMW, and ten minutes outside of Springfield, Holly dozed off, her head resting against Roger's shoulder.

Michael looked in the rearview mirror and saw the way Roger was looking at Holly as she slept. Michael knew his old friend well enough to know that Roger's thoughts were in a whirl over everything that had happened that day, but most especially over the fact that Holly had, without even needing to think about it, shoved him out of the way of a bullet...or what, at that second, they had all thought was a bullet. Thank God it hadn't been a real bullet. Michael didn't even want to think about what could be happening now, or what a wreck Roger would be, if it _**had** _been a real bullet.

Not to take anything away from Donna, because Michael knew without a doubt that she loved him, always had, and always would, but Michael couldn't see her jumping between him and a bullet. He admired Holly for what she had done, and he knew that the part Roger was wrestling with was the realization that Holly loved him enough to have died for him.

"That's quite a woman you've got there, Roger," Michael said quietly, catching Roger's eye in the rearview mirror.

"Yeah," Roger said, not taking his eyes off of her sleeping against his shoulder.

The rest of the drive back to Bay City was silent. When they arrived at The Bayshore, Roger unbuckled his seat belt, then Holly's, then gently leaned over and spoke directly into her ear. "Holly, wake up. We're home."

Holly awoke blinking her eyes, shook her head to clear the cobwebs, and looked at Roger. "I dozed off?" she asked.

"The adrenaline wore off," Michael said. He turned in his seat to look at them.

"Michael..." Roger began.

But Michael waved him off. "I know," he said simply.

"Thank you, Michael, for everything," Holly said then. "And thank Donna for us too."

"Will do," Michael said. A distant rumble of thunder sounded. "Looks like that storm that hit in Springfield is making its way here," he said. "I'd better get home, and you two had better get inside. Talk to you later."

"Later," Roger said. Holly opened her door and got out, and Roger followed her. They stood there watching Michael drive away until his taillights disappeared, then headed into the hotel.

Neither of them said anything on the ride up to the seventeenth floor in the elevator, but when they reached their floor and stepped off the elevator, and found that the floor was deserted, Roger said, "We both need to get cleaned up."

"Yeah," Holly said, looking down at her ruined sweater and khakis. "And then I really think we need to talk."

"Yes," Roger agreed. They were walking down the hall now, and they reached Holly's suite first. "Fifteen minutes?" Roger asked.

"Your suite or mine?" Holly asked.

"Yours," Roger replied.

"Fifteen minutes," Holly agreed as she unlocked her door.

They just stood there looking at each other for a long moment, and Holly couldn't completely decipher everything she saw in Roger's eyes. He leaned forward and kissed her forehead. "Fifteen minutes," he said softly before turning and walking down the hall to his own suite to get cleaned up and changed.


End file.
